Chapter 46 - Bardy
BARDY
Love looks not with the eyes but with the mind.
They are circling. A settling before the real business starts.
Bardy: “You’re back to wood turning then.”
Lou, self-conscious: “More like a bit of sculpture. Doubt I’ll enter it for anything.”
Bardy: “But you’ll show it at the exhibition?”
Lou: “I’d forgotten that.”
It was a tradition that the group always put their work on display for a weekend before entering it for the MACKL prize, and anyone in town could come and have a look.
“Yep. Nate said we can use the gallery. Might be our last chance.”
“It’s really closing? Shame. What about the Constable exhibition or whatever?” Lou asks.
“Not sure it’s fully decided, but in the end, he only secured the loan of one painting. A minor one, of clouds. I’ve seen it. It’s good and definitely looks like Norfolk. But Nate thinks it will take more than that to get the press interested.”
“So this new bloke will turn it into flats?”
Bardy nods.
Lou’s chair creaks beneath him as he reaches for the thermos in his bag. “Tea?”
“Look!” Bardy whispers.
On the bank in front of them, not three meters away, is an otter. Body sleek and shining, even in the early morning drizzle. It runs like an undulating wave for a few moments before pausing, studying them, then slipping back into the water with barely a splash.
“Well! Would you look at that,” Lou says, sitting back.
They smile at each other. Both nodding.
Bardy knows it’s time. Both do.
“Hana’s asked if I would come to New Zealand with her. Make a fresh start.”
Lou blows out a breath and, putting his umbrella aside, concentrates hard on pouring tea.
After a while, nodding, he says, “Well, that would be good, wouldn’t it?
Be there with the boys.” He passes Bardy a cup.
Face composed. Body solid, shrouded in a fleece blanket. Only his hand trembles slightly.
“I don’t know what to do, mate.”
“How come?”
“Of course I want to be with the boys, and I think I never really got over Hana.”
“But?”
Does Lou sound hopeful?
Was this really such a good idea?
“I’d miss this,” Bardy says simply.
“What! Getting up at the crack of dawn as some bugger’s texted you? Sitting in the rain drinking lukewarm tea? Arses about to end up in the mud?” Lou’s chair creaks ominously.
“We did get to see an otter.”
“Of course, there is that.”
Bardy can detect his best friend’s laughter.
Lou sips his tea before saying, “Seriously, mate. Family first.” He looks Bardy full in the eye now. Clemenza, reassuring, saying it as it is.
“I keep coming back to what Tina said.”
“Should never have told you that,” Lou replies, shaking his head.
“Nah, it’s alright. Just wish I could talk to her.”
“You and me both, mate.”
Bardy would like to hold his best friend’s hand. But they don’t do that. Unless he’s in the hospital and you think he might die.
How can he leave this, leave this man?
How can he not?
“Then there’s Tay,” Bardy says.
“Ah, yes, that would be hard on her. But she’s getting on with stuff. She and Uzma make quite a team.” Clemenza coughs. “And I’d keep an eye.”
“I know you would. That wasn’t quite what I meant.” Bardy sips his tea. It really is disgusting. He thinks of the café. Bacon sandwich and a large Americano. His usual. God, he’d miss that.
“What did you mean about Tay? I’m not a bloody mind reader.” Lou lets some of his hurt show.
“It’s the way Tay hugs Hana. Trusts her completely.”
“Mate, not being dense here, but isn’t it more the way you feel when you hug the woman?”
He hasn’t thought of that. How does it feel? Good. Familiar. But also odd. He did have doubts, and what about . . .
“And what about Kate? Thought you two might make a go of it.” Lou reads his mind and plays his trump card.
“She’s silver, you know.”
Lou nods. “I can see that.”
That’s why he loves this man. He gets it. Never laughs at him. Well, not when it comes to the important stuff.
“I don’t know if Kate would even be interested.” Bardy knows he is playing for time rather than compliments.
“For fuck’s sake!” Lou exclaims.
“What?”
“You need to get on with whatever you’re going to do.” Lou stares off into the distance.
He should never have contacted Lou. It hadn’t been fair.
“She saw you, you know.”
“What? Who?” Bardy is struggling to keep up.
“At Satya and Jack’s. Think she went back down for something. I was behind her on the stairs. You and Hana. You know.”
“Oh fuck!”
“Yeah, quite. Made myself scarce. Didn’t want to make her feel worse.”
“Was she upset?”
“What do you think, mate?” Lou now sounds angry.
“Right. Right. You’re right, I need to get my shit together. Make a decision.”
Bardy can feel the big man beside him relax slightly, softening.
“Look, I can see it’s hard. You and Hana have history, the boys. Family. But it will only work if you and Hana are solid.”
And are they? Yes and no.
Bardy wonders if life would be easier as an otter.
“And what did you mean about Tay?” Lou rewinds.
“It’s just that Tay doesn’t trust many people. And yet with Hana, she’s different. I can see that, and it does make a difference. Tay sees what is special about Hana. And that counts for something. Then I think . . . sorry mate . . . that Tina must have been wrong.”
“Well, you can’t ask Tina,” her widower says, “but you can talk to Tay.”