CHAPTER FOURTEEN
After her mom had set her plate on the picnic table, Skylar maneuvered herself onto the bench, then propped the crutches up on the end of the table. Janessa, Will, Jay and Misha were also seated there and greeted her with smiles.
“Hey, Aiden,” Jay called out. “Come sit here.”
Skylar frowned at her brother as Aiden headed over and put his plate down on the table next to Jay.
“I’m going to get a drink,” he said. “Anyone else need one?”
Janessa nudged Skylar’s arm. “You don’t have a drink.”
“Want me to grab you one, Skylar?” Aiden asked.
“Uh, sure.”
After she told him her preference, he gave her a nod, then headed toward the large cooler that held cans of soda packed in ice.
“Stop scowling,” Janessa said. “Your face is gonna stay that way.”
“From what I’ve seen, that’s already happened,” Wilder commented drily.
Skylar rolled her eyes at her brother while Lexi elbowed him. “That’s not a nice thing to say to your sister.”
“You know that teasing my siblings is how I express my love for them,” Wilder told his wife.
“You could just say you love us, like a normal person would,” Janessa told him.
“But where’s the fun in that?”
“Here you go, Sky,” Aiden said as he approached her.
She looked up at him as she wrapped her hand around the can he held out to her, the condensation on its smooth surface chilling her fingers. “Thank you.”
A quick smile crossed his face as he said, “You’re welcome.”
He headed back to the other end of the table where he’d set his plate. Settling down on the bench by Jay, he cracked his soda open and lifted the can to take a sip.
Skylar shifted her attention to her meal, taking a bite of the potato salad as she tried not to focus on Aiden.
It hadn’t been a big surprise to show up at the house and find Aiden there. In fact, once she’d seen him at church, she would have been more surprised if he hadn’t been invited.
She was curious as to why he’d shown up for the morning service. At the end of their relationship, she’d known that he had moved away from his faith, and she was sure that Cole had as well. Not that she was pointing fingers at them because she’d basically done the same thing.
It had been hard to find a church to plug into when she’d left Serenity for college. And when she’d discovered she was pregnant, finding a church had dropped completely off her priority list. Since then, she hadn’t even attempted to grow in her faith.
She was attending church in Serenity simply to appease her family. It wasn’t as bad as she’d thought it would be. In fact, there had been something comforting about being back in the familiarity of her childhood faith.
Glancing down the table, she did another quick category of Aiden’s appearance. It was hard not to compare him to the young man she’d fallen in love with.
Though he smiled easily enough as he conversed with her family, she could see that he didn’t have the carefree attitude he’d had as a teen. There were dark smudges under his eyes, and he’d lost the glow of youth. The responsibility of caring for his family in light of the tragedy they’d endured seemed to weigh him down.
Sadly for her, none of that had diminished his attractiveness.
It was one of the things that had sparked her initial crush on him. He’d also always treated her well, even when Cole was frustrated with her. Around the time she turned fifteen, their interactions had turned mildly flirtatious as they’d each put out feelers toward the other.
And then there had been their first date. Their first kiss. Holding hands. Hugging.
All of those moments played through her mind in great detail, and familiar butterflies came to life in her stomach. It was like the period of time around the breakup didn’t exist. The man he was now was most similar to the one she’d fallen in love with. Not the one who’d broken her heart.
“How’re you doing, Sky?” Jay asked. “Ankle doing better?”
“Not better enough.” Skylar took a sip of her soda, grateful for the distraction from her thoughts. “I still have pain if I’m not careful.”
“I’ve sprained a few ankles in my day, and they can be so annoying. Almost worse than a break because mentally, it feels like it should heal faster, and sometimes it doesn’t.”
“Sprained muscles can take a while to heal,” Misha said. “It really depends on how badly the muscle and ligaments are impacted.”
Conversation flowed easily around the table. Even Aiden was participating, sharing about his life and his career. She was a bit surprised at how well he interacted with her family.
In the past, he would never have shown up without Cole being there. Even when they were dating, he was most at ease when Cole was present, too. The way he conversed with Will and Jay spoke to the maturity he’d gained over the years.
When the guys began talking about basketball and how Cole had done in the most recent season, Janessa and Misha started up their own conversation, centered on the kids. Skylar just listened as she ate, since she had nothing to contribute.
“How are you finding things with Shiloh now that she knows about you?”
Skylar glanced at Janessa before lifting the hotdog her mom had fixed for her. “So far, so good.”
“Is it weird?” Misha asked.
“Yes.” She didn’t really need to ask Misha to clarify. “It was challenging enough when no one else knew. But it feels worse now.”
Janessa frowned at her. “What do you mean?”
“Everyone, including Shiloh, just viewed me as her aunt. Now, everyone knows she’s my biological daughter, and it just feels… weird. Harder.”
“Do you wish she was yours and Aiden’s now?”
Skylar shook her head. “Not in the way you mean. I think Charli and Blake are better parents to her given the circumstances, especially with what’s going on now. Had the situation been different, sure, it would have been nice to raise her, but that’s not how things worked out for us.”
Misha nodded. “You seem very determined to live in the moment and not dwell on what might have been.”
Well, that all depended on the moment, to be honest, but Skylar decided not to tell her that. She had a feeling that Misha was aware of that.
Was anyone ever able to live completely in the moment? Without any regrets for past decisions?
She didn’t think it was too likely.
“I just wish you hadn’t thought you had to keep it a secret from us all these years,” Janessa said.
“I thought it was for the best at the time.”
“Do you still think that?”
“Yes.”
“Well, I think you all have handled it quite well,” Misha told her. “Shiloh seems to be doing fine with it, from what Charli says.”
“She does seem to be taking it all in stride quite well,” Janessa agreed.
“It probably helps that they told her she was adopted early on, but then didn’t tell her who her birth parents were until later. It gave her time to get used to the concept.”
Skylar didn’t bother to tell them that had Aiden not agreed to show up for the blood test, Shiloh probably still wouldn’t know. She glanced over at Aiden and found him watching her.
The fluttering in her stomach was reminiscent of the past, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to be reminded of that time. But the reality was that he was the last man who’d brought those butterflies to life in her in that way.
After what happened with Aiden, she hadn’t let herself feel that anticipation or excitement over a man. She viewed the relationships she’d had as friendship with a side of intimacy. Which was probably why all of them had ended.
Apparently, Aiden didn’t have a serious relationship going on either. That didn’t mean he hadn’t had one in the time since they’d been together, however. It was ironic that he’d dumped her to find someone better, and yet he still hadn’t found that perfect woman.
If she hadn’t been perfect for Aiden before, she was definitely not perfect for him now. The thought sent a pang of hurt through her, but she ignored it. She wasn’t in the market for a relationship, let alone one with her ex.
At some point, the kids came to ask their parents if they could have ice cream. The two couples got up to help them, leaving Skylar with Aiden, Wilder, and Lexi.
“I want ice cream too,” Wilder said, swinging around on the bench. “How about you, love?”
“I shouldn’t…”
Wilder held out his hand to her. “C’mon. Help me choose what flavor I want, and I’ll let you share it with me.”
Lexi let Wilder help her up from the picnic table, then they wandered hand in hand to where Lee and Rori had ice cream and all the fixings for cones or sundaes.
Skylar watched them go, then turned back to Aiden. He was looking at her expectantly, a small smile playing on his lips. She felt a pang of nostalgia wash over her as memories of their past flooded her mind. She quickly pushed them away, focusing on the present moment.
“Are you getting ice cream, too?” Skylar asked, trying to sound casual.
Aiden nodded. “Yeah, I think I'll indulge a little.” He stood up, then picked up his empty plate. Motioning to hers, he said, “Want me to toss that out for you?”
“Sure. Thank you.”
She watched him as he walked to where they were dishing up the ice cream, pausing to toss their used plates into the garbage can that was set up for the trash from the meal.
Dragging her gaze away from him, Skylar looked down at her phone, checking to see what was new on her social media. She didn’t have large numbers of people on her accounts, but she had a few co-workers who posted a lot.
One co-worker in particular had posted tons of pictures from a recent work trip to Rome. As she looked at the photos, Skylar found herself missing the trips she’d taken. She hadn’t been to Rome, and that flight might have been hers if she’d still been working.
She’d been resigned to the fact that she wasn’t going to be taking any flights for at least a couple more weeks. Maybe more if she gained weight while she was basically unable to exercise and wasn’t watching what she was eating very closely. If she didn’t fit into her uniform, she might end up sidelined for longer.
She’d never had it happen to her, but others in the company had. Some might say such a rule was sexist, but it actually applied to all flight attendants, regardless of gender. If they didn’t fit their assigned uniform, they needed to do what they could to rectify that.
Movement on the other side of the table had Skylar looking up. Aiden was now seated opposite her with two dishes of ice cream. He slid one across the table to her.
Skylar stared down at it, taking in the choices Aiden had made for her. Vanilla ice cream. Walnuts. Bananas. Mini marshmallows. Chocolate syrup. Everything she would have chosen for herself. Everything she’d chosen back when they’d been dating, which is how he’d known what to get her now.
“I assumed your tastes hadn’t changed too much over the years,” Aiden said as he dipped his spoon into the chocolate ice cream in his bowl, which he’d covered in peanuts, caramel, and marshmallows. He never mixed fruit with his ice cream.
Given what she’d been thinking about right before he set the ice cream down in front of her, she should probably not indulge. But… “Thank you. I do still like all of this.”
Aiden flashed her a grin that was so familiar that it hurt her heart. “You’re welcome.”
Skylar took a spoonful of the ice cream, making sure to get a little bit of everything. The ice cream was rich and creamy. Obviously, they’d bought the good stuff, unlike what her mom had used to buy them when Skylar was a kid.
“How are you doing, Sky?” Aiden asked after they’d been eating in silence for a couple of minutes.
Frowning at him, she said, “I’m fine.”
One of his brows lifted. “Are you? I’m not asking flippantly. I’m serious. How are you?”
Skylar took another bite of her ice cream before answering. “Let’s see. I hear that the girl I gave birth to has been diagnosed with cancer. Then, in order to help her, I have to contact her birth father, who didn’t treat me very well. And on top of that, I sprained my ankle so I can’t go back to work. So yeah, I’m doing just fine.”
“I wish I could tell you that I’d walk away to make it easier on you, but I can’t.”
“I know that,” she said. “And I wouldn’t expect that you would because it would upset Shiloh.”
“I would like for us to become friends,” he said. “I understand that might be a bit of a stretch at the moment, but I really hope that eventually, we could reach that point.”
Skylar wasn’t sure how she felt about it. Her conversation with Cole had put the thought into her mind, but she hadn’t dwelled on it too much. Part of it was because she didn’t want to think about how she was apparently good enough to be a friend, but hadn’t been good enough to be something more.
“I don’t think it matters if we’re friends or not,” she told him. “Once my ankle is better, I’ll be gone.”
“But surely you’ll be back to see Shiloh,” he said as he lifted another spoonful of ice cream to his mouth.
“Definitely, but I won’t be here for extended stays. Not like this time.”
“I think that being friends would also be beneficial as we relate to Shiloh,” he said. “She would probably pick up on the fact that we’re uncomfortable around each other if we can’t be friends.”
“We don’t have to see her at the same time, so she won’t know how we do or don’t relate to each other.”
Resignation settled over Aiden’s features. “I do understand why you don’t want to be friends. I treated you badly, and I am very sorry for that.”
“Not sorry enough to approach me to apologize,” she said, trying to keep her emotions from her voice. “You could have asked Cole where I was, or you could have asked him for my phone number. If you’d really regretted what you did, you would have found a way to contact me.”
“You’re right.” Aiden stirred his ice cream, keeping his gaze lowered. “I should have apologized before now.”
Skylar waited for him to give excuses for why he hadn’t.
“I was a coward,” he said with a shrug. “I didn’t like being confronted by what I’d done to you. I didn’t like to think about that time.”
Skylar thought he might have used what had happened with his dad and sister to excuse why he hadn’t pursued making amends with her. So for him to admit it was because he was scared to do it surprised her.
Right then, she wasn’t sure if there was anything he could do to bridge the chasm that had grown between them because of what had happened. But she also knew that it would be better if the two of them were on friendly terms, even if they wouldn’t ever be friends the way they once had been.
“I agree that it might be best if we could be around each other without tension,” she finally said. “Let’s just leave the past in the past.”
He tilted his head. “Just like that?”
“Just like that,” she said.
It wasn’t like they hadn’t discussed the past. They’d touched on what had happened, and she’d had an epic meltdown about it right in front of him. That was enough for her. She had no desire to have an in-depth conversation about it all.
Though he didn’t look thrilled, he gave a single nod.
If things went the way she planned, any time they spent together would be when others were around. And it wouldn’t be for long periods. So there was really no need to rehash the past more.
She wasn’t sure what her future held, but she’d come to the place of accepting that Aiden was going to be a part of it to varying degrees. Whether she liked it or not.