Chapter 19
CHAPTER NINETEEN
LUKE
“ I think they took the news about Matthew’s gun pretty well,” I mention as Erin kicks off her heels and hobbles over to the couch.
“They did,” she agrees, lifting up her feet and flinching like she’s in pain.
“You okay?” I’ve noticed her pulling strange faces all night. I thought she was just feeling awkward around my folks because of everything that's happened between us, but now, I can see she’s in genuine pain.
“I’m fine, I just forgot how uncomfortable heels are.” She rubs her feet to try and ease them, and I chuckle to myself as I kneel on the floor, taking one in my hand and massaging my thumbs deep into her sole.
“What did you wear ‘em for? You don’t normally wear heels.” I laugh, wondering why women do these things to themselves
“Because I could.” She answers me with a twinkle in her eye, and I love seeing how each day she’s growing in confidence. “It wasn’t by choice I never wore heels; your brother threw out all the shoes he didn’t like after we got married,” she explains
“Didn’t like that they made you taller than him?” I chuckle, remembering how I always had the upper hand when it came to height. I may have been the younger one, but I had at least a foot on him.
“I guess.” She shrugs, looking sad, and I suddenly feel awful for making a joke outta something that was clearly part of the abuse she suffered.
“I didn’t mean for that to come out the way it did; it’s not funny.”
“It’s fine, I know you didn’t mean it like that, and I guess it kinda makes sense.” She looks down at me and laughs a little, herself. “I guess we both have to stop being sorry,” she tells me. I smile, and I can’t help sliding my hand up her dress between her thighs.
“I agree.” I stand on my knees to kiss her, and when she starts unbuttoning her dress, I unbuckle my belt so I can unleash the cock that's been hard for her all fuckin’ night.
I’m suddenly liking the idea of fuckin’ my girl, here on the couch. Keeping us a secret gets harder every day. I can’t count how many times I wanted to tell my parents tonight that I’m here for more than just her protection now.
I slide my hand up over her perfect body, taking hold of one of her round tits and squeezing it in my hand.
“Ouch…be careful with those.” She bites her lip like she’s uncomfortable, and I quickly let her go.
“Shit, Erin, I’m sorry. I’ve been getting rougher lately. I think it’s all the frustration of not being able to touch you whenever I want,” I try to explain myself. “I’ll be more careful.”
“No, it’s fine… I like it.” She seems surprised by her own admission. “Just not there, right now,” she tells me, clutching her hands over them while I nod and get back to kissing her.
I take her hips in my hands and drag them to the edge of the couch, sinking my head between her legs and licking her pussy just the way she likes it.
It never takes me long to make my girl come when I’m using my mouth.
Her pussy is so sensitive to my tongue, and I can’t get enough of the way it tastes.
She’s been tense these past few days; it’s good to see her unwind.
It’s even better that I’m the one helping her do it.
I wait till she’s come all over my tongue before shifting up her body and slowly filling her with my cock.
I never tire of hearing that gasp she makes when I first slide into her.
I could watch the way this woman takes me for hours, but there's no way I could ever last that long. Just being near her has me edging, and being inside her is so intense it makes my fuckin’ head spin.
“I love you,” she tells me, with tears that look sad instead of happy, magnifying her eyes.
“I love you, too.” I wipe them away with my thumb, cradling her head in my hands as I thrust inside her. “Always have, always gonna,” I assure her, still unable to believe that she’s mine.
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” she whispers, spilling more tears over my fingers and making me wonder what the hell is going through this girl's head. Surely she must see how mad I am about her. I can hardly keep my hands off her.
“Erin, I’m gonna love you till the day I die.” I pause to ensure she fuckin’ hears me.
“I hope so, Luke.” She kisses me hard, holding me tight to her body like she’s scared to let go, and I take her slow and steady, trying to ensure that she knows she’s got me for keeps.
“Darlin’, are you okay?” I tap my knuckles against the bathroom door the next morning, and when Erin finally emerges, she looks pale and washed out. “I think you're coming down with something.” I hold my hand up to her forehead, and she brushes it away like she can’t tolerate my touch.
“It’s probably something I ate.” She attempts to smile but quickly rushes back to the bathroom, gripping the basin as she starts throwing up again.
“You should go back to bed.” I rinse out the basin and pull her hair back over her shoulder.
“I can’t. I need to be somewhere today,” she tells me, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand.
“Baby, you can’t go anywhere in this state.
” I laugh, loving this new stubborn trait she’s developed over the past few weeks.
“Come on, I’ll tuck ya back into bed and get ya what you need before I start work again.
” I smile to myself when I notice her birth control pills on full display in the cabinet.
Though I’m sure they were there yesterday morning, too.
“I said I have somewhere to be.” She fills her hand with water so she can rinse her mouth out, before picking up her toothbrush, and I step back, being mindful of how upset she got the last time I told her she shouldn’t leave the house.
She obviously finds it triggering, and I have to trust that she knows her own mind.
I leave her to it and finish clearing up after breakfast, then when I see her head through the living room toward her room, I get an idea and follow after her.
“If you need to be at this place so bad, at least let me drive you,” I offer, watching her pull on some jeans and an oversized T-shirt.
“I can drive myself, you’re busy.” She smiles at me as she passes me at the door, and I get really confused when I see that the pills I caught her hiding last night are still on the mattress.
“Erin, I’m not saying this because I don’t want you to leave, I’m just lookin’ out for ya,” I explain, hoping she’ll understand the difference between care and control. Sometimes I even question myself, and I hate Matthew for that.
“And I love you for it, but I need to do this by myself.” She plants a kiss on my mouth and heads for the door, and as desperate as I am to know where she’s going, I have to let her leave without asking. She’s sensitive right now, and I refuse to set us back.
“Just call me when you get there; let me know you're okay,” I call after her.
“Sure.” She smiles at me over her shoulder before heading out, and I quickly head to the bathroom and check I wasn’t seeing things and the pills are still there.
I see them exactly where they were, and when I head back to her room, I pick up the box that's on her bed. She wasn’t hiding birth control from me when I caught her last night.
She lied to me. I look at the wardrobe where the loose floorboard is, then out through the window to check if her car is gone.
It’s wrong of me to want to check up on her; I shouldn’t be this paranoid.
Everyone's entitled to their privacy, and after all she’s been through, I really should be respecting hers.
But the thought of her keeping something from me is driving me insane.
I’m disgusted in myself for even thinking of looking under the floorboard as I quickly march toward the door to get back to work, but something stops me from opening it.
Something, I fear, holds a likeness in me to my brother.
Something that draws me back into the bedroom, and tells me to lift up that loose floorboard, and when I give in to its temptation and reach my hand inside, I’m stunned.
Confused, and fuckin’ furious at what I’m holding when I pull it back out.