Chapter 28
Cody
Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks.
~ William Shakespeare
My thumbs drum the steering wheel as I drive past the Buckners’ ranch. My truck nearly steers itself onto the main drive out of habit. I’ve been driving the short space between our ranches ever since I got my license—honestly, before then on ATVs and tractors. Tonight, I’m going a different route.
I take the main road down a few miles and turn left onto Smokehouse Road. It’s named after the place a few miles down where the pork is smoked as bacon, ham or sausage.
The dirt road leading to the back of the Buckners’ is fenced off with a rickety old gate.
I hop out of my truck, leaving the engine running and unlatching the gate.
Once I drive through, I hop out and shut it behind myself.
Then, with my low beams on, I travel the bumpy old dirt pathway to Carli’s cabin.
I pull in behind the building, killing my lights and the engine and walking around to the front door.
The door swings open before I even knock.
My smile is instantaneous. “Waiting for me?”
“I heard you pull up,” she says, tucking a piece of her blonde hair behind her ear. It’s a little unruly as it tends to get by the end of a day, so it pops right back out after she lifts her hand away.
“Hi,” I say, stepping over the threshold and turning back toward her while she shuts the door.
“Hi.”
We stare at one another for a moment, exchanging smiles.
“Do you want something to drink?” she offers.
“Maybe later.”
“Okay. Well …” she waves a hand around the living area. “Welcome to my place.”
I glance around. The walls are painted a warm yellow with the one behind the fireplace painted almost terra cotta.
The furniture is overstuffed and comfortable looking, two side chairs and a sofa centered around a coffee table and all facing the fireplace.
Above the mantel, she’s got a flatscreen TV.
Across the room is an island with barstools, and the galley kitchen is behind that.
Everything looks neat and tidy—a little too tidy.
“Did you straighten up for me?” I smile.
“A little,” she admits.
“Hmmm.” I step toward her and pull her into a hug. “I like that.”
“You like me tidying my place for you?”
“Yeah,” I say, looking down at her. “I like that I matter enough for you to care.”
“Maybe I want to impress you,” she says, batting her lashes up at me.
“You already do.”
She smiles and I reluctantly release her.
I have no plan—just to see her, to be with her alone after a day spent skirting around one another.
“Do you want to watch something?” she asks. “Or play a board game?”
She steps further into the room and I follow, plopping down on the center cushion of the couch and resting my arms along the back.
“Oh, no,” I say. “I know how you are with board games. It’s brutal.”
“I’d give you a handicap.”
I laugh. “Way to bolster a man’s ego.”
“They say a man’s ego is the most fragile thing on earth,” she mutters softly.
“Probably so,” I agree. “So, tread lightly, Chuck.”
She laughs, walking over and finally sitting next to me.
“Are you nervous?” I ask her.
“A little. It doesn’t make sense. I’ve known you forever. We’ve been sneaking around, calling, texting, grabbing up time, even taking that sweet day away to Nashville.” She pauses, her eyes searching mine. “There’s just something about having you here—in my space.”
I nod. “I’d feel the same way if you came over to my place. It’s sure not as clean as yours.”
“Oh really?” Her voice is teasing.
“Yeah. I run from the station to the ranch and back again. Now that I’ve been seeing you, I don’t do enough cleaning of my cabin.”
“So it’s my fault?” She lightly shoves my arm.
“Yeah. And I’m good with that.”
She nestles down so her head is on my shoulder. “I’m good with it too.”
“I was going to light a fire and make cocoa,” she says.
“That sounds good. Why don’t I get the fire going? You can make the cocoa.”
She tips her head up and kisses my cheek. Then she runs her hand down my jaw.
“Don’t ever shave at night.”
“You like that?”
“Mm hmm. I like the stubble. Not all the time, but at night. I like it.” She runs her hand down it again and I swear I’d grow a mountain-man beard if she wanted me to.
She places another kiss on my cheek and stands to go into the kitchen. I start the fire while she putters around and returns with two mugs.
Something settles deep inside me when I glance up and see her standing there.
I rise to my feet, taking my mug and looking down into her eyes.
“Carli?” My breath stalls and my chest fills with warmth.
“Hmm?”
“I love you.”
“Oh.” Her mouth pops into a surprised “O.”
I chuckle. I definitely caught us both off guard.
She sets her mug on the mantel, takes mine from me and sets it right next to hers and then she loops her arms around my neck. “Cody Lawson?”
“Hmm?” I smile down at her.
“I’ve been in love with you for years. But over this past bit of time since you kissed me in the hog barn?”
I laugh. I can’t help it. “Yeah?”
“I’ve fallen hard. I love you too.”
I feel like letting out a whoop that could be heard all the way at my ranch. My chest is so full of something I’ve never felt before it could burst.
“You love me,” I say it out loud just to let it all sink in.
“Yeah. I love you—big time.”
I lean in and kiss her. She’s it for me.
I knew it a while back, but the idea hadn’t made its way to the front of my mind like it has over the past week.
She kisses me with a tenderness that makes me want to protect her and keep her to myself but also parade her around town so everyone can see she’s mine.
I tug her close and our kiss deepens. She runs her fingers through my hair and I have to step back.
My forehead rests on hers.
“Carli, I’ll take you up on that board game now.”
“Ready to get your butt kicked?”
“By you? Yeah. I think I am.”
She pulls out a few choices and we land on Clue.
We sip our cocoa, talking and playing well into the night.
After she beats me twice at Clue, we put the game away and snuggle up on the couch, my arm around her and her tucked into my side.
The silence between us feels lived-in—like we’re returning to something road-tested over years, not something as new as we are.
I run my fingers up and down Carli’s arm in lazy strokes.
The fire mellows and she lets out a contented sigh.
When she looks up at me, her eyes are soft and drowsy.
I lean in and place kisses on the lids, then her nose and then I trail kisses down her jaw and her neck.
When our mouths meet, we’re slow and languid, not in a rush, not worried about being caught, not desperate.
This kiss says I love you—the kind of kiss that says we’ve found our home.
We pull apart, smiling softly at one another in the firelight. Carli snuggles back into my chest.
“I love you, Cody,” she says on a breath.
“Love you too, Chuck.” I smooth her hair and we stare into the fire as it crumbles to embers.
I don’t know when we dozed off, but I wake to the pitch black of the cabin at night.
Carli is snuggled against me, her breath warm and even against my chest. I lie here holding her for a few moments.
She shifts, burrowing into me and letting out a soft sigh.
I lift my arm carefully so as not to wake her.
“Mmm?” she says, shifting and gripping on to my shirt in her half-asleep state.
“Hey,” I say softly.
“Hey,” she answers groggily. “What time is it?”
“I have no idea. We fell asleep.”
“I was dreaming that you were holding me.”
“Not a dream,” I tell her. “You might want to sleep in your bed, though.”
“I like your shoulder.” She’s definitely still half asleep. It’s like I gave her a shot of truth serum.
“My shoulder likes you too.”
“Mmm. Your shoulder loves me.”
“True.” I smile.
She stretches and collapses onto my lap, tucking her legs up and curling into me. “G’nite, Cody.”
“Carli?”
“Hmm?” She doesn’t budge.
“Let’s get you to bed.”
“I can’t take you to bed, Cody,” she says, but her words are slurred. “Jace doesn’t even know I kissed you.”
“Yeah. Probably best we tell him before I go to bed with you.” I chuckle.
Something about that sentence must be the equivalent of a cold glass of water because Carli bolts upright. “Did you say you’re telling Jace?”
“No. I said I can’t go to bed with you while he doesn’t even know we’re dating.”
She laughs and rubs her eyes. “Oh. Yeah. There’s a few things that need to happen before you go to bed with me. That’s one.”
I chuckle. Then I smile at the idea of Carli in a wedding dress …
“Let’s get you to bed.”
“Are you driving back home tonight?”
I pull my cell out. Two forty-five.
“I could sleep on the couch and leave before sunrise,” I offer.
Staying means a greater chance Jace could sense something—questions waiting in the morning if I’m not home before work starts on the ranch. But when Carli looks at me like that, my decision is made.
“Do that. Stay here,” she says. “Blankets are in that coat closet by the front door.”
She stands up and I follow her. Then she wraps her arms around my waist and tugs me close. “I like you being here.”
“I like being here.”
“Mmm. You love it,” she says, yawning.
Exhausted Carli might just be my new favorite thing.
“I do love it,” I tell her.
She turns toward her bedroom and says, “Goodnight, Cody. Set an alarm.”
“Got that covered,” I say, pulling down blankets and settling onto the couch.
I could leave. But I like being one room over from her. Just for tonight.
I fall asleep easily, which is unusual for me. I’m a typical firefighter—our sleep cycles get all messed up and we wake to a pin dropping. Not tonight. I’m out within minutes of my head hitting the throw pillow on Carli’s oversized couch.
I wake before dawn to the sound of my phone alarm. I stretch and fold the blankets I used last night. The dim pre-dawn light bathes the room in blue-grey shadows.
Carli comes out from her bedroom, wearing pajamas, her hair sticking out in all directions.
“Morning,” she says softly. “Want me to make you a coffee?”
“Another time. I’d better get going. Both ranches will be rousing soon.”
“Yeah. That’s true. I have to get to the barn in a bit anyway.”
I check the time. She’s not wrong. My margin is thinner than I had planned.
She walks over to me and pulls me into a hug. “Thanks for staying.”
“I’m glad I came over.”
“Me too.”
“I’ll text you later. Okay?”
“Yeah.”
She walks me to the door.
I open it and look around even though we’re far from the main house and barns. The sun is already rising. It’s not ideal. I planned to get back to the ranch before everyone was up and moving.
Reality is a thief, invading our bubble again.
I drive in the direction of the ranch, but at the last minute, I turn toward town. It’s less than an hour before shift change. I don’t want to risk my brothers or McKenna seeing me drive in from being out all night. I drive straight to the station to start my next twenty-four-hour shift.
I don’t think through the logistics of my decision until we’re gathered around the table for our shift-change meeting.
"Nice outfit you were wearing this morning," Grey mutters low, a smirk on his face.
“What?” I ask.
I showed up in yesterday’s clothes. I’m in my station uniform now, but leave it to Grey to notice.
“It looked well-worn,” Greyson says. “Did you sleep in your clothes or something?”
Actually … “I um … Yeah. Slept in them.” I feel myself actually blush.
Greyson’s brow raises. He’s far too perceptive.
“Going for consistency?” Patrick asks with a chuckle.
“Forget to do laundry, Cap?” Dustin follows.
It’s the first time one of the guys has actually called me captain. I don’t officially start until the day after tomorrow, but leave it to Dustin to jump the gun.
“Something like that. Now let’s get to work,” I say, testing out my new role.
They can still rib me. I would miss it if they didn’t. Just not with jokes that hit so close to home.
Everyone clears out of the kitchen. The alternating crew heads home and our crew moves into the bay. I’m at a loss for a minute. David’s here for his last day today, helping me transition. After this, he’ll be at the county offices and I’ll be on my own.
“I thought we could go over the captain’s log.”
“The captain’s log? Like in Star Trek?” I joke.
“Not exactly,” David laughs. “It’s a log I keep of protocols and details about calls—notes that I keep for follow up, clarity, and a backup to any incident report.”
I walk behind David into the office. It feels odd, but also right being here while the rest of the crew is out in the bay running checks. I’m officially going to be their captain now.
“You’ll probably still go on fires until we hire your replacement,” David says.
“Sounds good.”
“Have a seat,” he says. He walks to one of the two chairs in front of the desk and eyes the empty seat he always took behind the desk.
I walk over and sit down, swiveling and tugging the chair so it’s tucked into place.
David pulls up a notebook and opens it.
He thumbs through, showing me the types of entries he’s made in the past.
His gaze follows mine toward the door leading out into the bay.
Then he says, “Low-risk calls, you can stay behind. You’ve watched me over the years.
When it’s all hands, you’re on the field in a turnout with everyone else.
Otherwise, you’re here running point and holding down the fort for other needs. ”
I nod.
“You’ll adjust, Cody.”
“I know. I really feel like I will now.”
“Good.” David’s smile is warm and assuring. “You’ve got a bright future in the department.”
The laughter of the crew filters in from the bay. David stands to walk into the kitchen, and I settle into my new desk chair.