Chapter 29
Carli
I want all of you, forever, you and me, every day.
~ Nicholas Sparks
Cody and I have resorted to sneaking time around the edges again.
We met at the fence line late at night one night.
Him on Jasper and me on Lark. Our kiss was frantic and hurried.
Then we separated. He calls me to say goodnight when he can.
We text. But we’ve been forced into collecting desperate scraps of time, nothing as sweet and luxurious as our day in Nashville or the night he stayed over.
He’s been on shift. I’ve had work. Family obligations on both sides. With McKenna’s wedding approaching, everything’s tighter.
This morning he came over to check on Dad as an emissary of his family. I don’t know how he managed to be the one they sent. But I’m certainly not complaining.
We’re in the main hog barn. Farrowing’s over. Sows are milking, early litters are in the nursery, and we’re getting ready to send some older hogs to market.
I’m mucking stalls.
Yeah. Glamorous way to impress the boyfriend: scooping hog manure.
Jace steps into the barn. “Chet, help me with the chute.”
Chet looks up and nods, walking out of the barn, leaving me and Cody alone.
The doors to the outside pen are huge and we’ve slid them open to shuttle hogs into the outside area before loading them onto the truck when it arrives.
Chet and Jace’s voices carry in from outside. If I stand just right, I can see Jace’s plaid shirt and a part of his face. He’s focused on the task at hand, but there’s only about thirty yards between us and where he and Chet are standing.
Cody steps toward me. His voice is a whisper.
“I miss you, Carli.”
“I miss you too,” I say, leaning on the handle of my manure fork.
He steps one step closer to me. “You look beautiful.”
“You’re kidding, right?” I look up into his eyes. Then I glance out through the open barn doors, checking for my brother. “Bet I smell great too.”
Cody steps closer and takes an exaggerated sniff. “Mmmm.”
I laugh and then stifle my laughter. “Cody!” I whisper-scold, smacking his chest.
“What? You do.” He’s the picture of innocence—only not.
He reaches up and brushes a hair out of my face, and before I can say a word, he glances around, leans in and places the sweetest kiss on my lips.
I want to linger—to grip his shirt, to tug him to me, to run out of the barn, hop in a truck and go somewhere alone with him.
Jace’s voice is the first one I hear. Then his boots on the concrete. Chet answers Jace.
What were we thinking?
I jump backward, pushing Cody’s chest.
Cody jumps back.
The hog in the pen with us startles, shifts, and lunges sideways, bumping Cody in the back of the knees with a loud, sharp squeal.
Cody loses his footing, but regains it, stomping his foot down into the hay—and a pile of manure.
“Ahhhh!” he shouts as the loud squishing sound fills the pen. “Ugh”
“Cody!”
Jace is at the pen in an instant—his eyes flitting between me and Cody. His brows draw in. “What is going on?”
We both practically shout, “Nothing!”
Cody stares at Jace, his face neutral. I glance down at Cody’s boot. He definitely stepped in it. Right in it. The boot’s coated in straw and manure all the way over the toe.
Dad enters the barn at the far door. “Cody, could you help me unload this feed?”
Cody looks down at his boot, scuffs it twice on the hay, and shouts, “Coming!”
He strides down the aisle, right past my dad, manure and all.
Dad asks, “What is that smell?”
Cody keeps walking, straight out of the barn to the feed delivery truck, not saying a word, as if he just struts around town coated in pig poop all the time, thank you very much.
Jace’s brow furrows. I chuckle.
“Did he just march out of here with a boot coated in hog droppings?”
“Yeah,” I chuckle. “Yeah, he did.”
I finish mucking stalls and am at my cabin cleaning up when I get a text from Cody.
Cody: Meet me tonight.
Carli: I don’t think we should meet at my cabin.
Cody: Agreed. Jace wasn’t suspicious this morning, but he’s not totally oblivious. We don’t need to push our luck.
Carli: You mean like no kissing in the hog barn? That kind of thing?
Cody: I claim the fifth—or something like the fifth. I couldn’t help myself.
Carli: Because me with straw and eau de hog is so irresistible.
Cody: Oddly, yes.
Carli: You’re too much.
Cody: I think you like it.
Carli: I already told you. I love you—even your crazy perception of what makes me attractive. Where should I meet you?
Cody: Want to meet at the old Waddell property? Our usual spot?
Carli: That works.
Cody: I’ll be in my truck waiting for you.
Carli: I’ll meet you there.
I spend the day at work, come home, change and drive to the main house for dinner with my family. Ever since Dad’s diagnosis, I’ve been taking every opportunity to be with my parents during meals or when they need me around the farm.
As soon as dinner is over, I rinse my plate and start to head for the door.
“Do you want to stick around and watch a show with me and Dad?” Mom asks.
“I’ll take a rain check,” I tell her. “It’s already been a full week. And McKenna’s wedding is coming this weekend.”
And I’m meeting Cody at an abandoned property in a half hour.
I can’t wait until I can say that kind of sentence out loud. Not that I’d tell my mother that I was meeting him at an abandoned property. But, I want to be able to say I’m seeing him—out loud, to everyone.
I pull down Chigger Ridge and turn onto the road leading to our little turn off. Cody’s there, in the back of his truck.
We lie on the blankets, Cody’s arm around me, laughing and talking.
He fills me in on how it feels to be easing into his role as captain, I tell him about Dad.
We reminisce about things we remember when we were younger.
Time dissolves. Occasionally, Cody leans in and kisses me.
Mostly, we’re just soaking up being in each other’s presence after a few days of having to live on scraps.
“We were joking about kids last time,” he says.
“That was a joke?” I ask, playfully.
“Not completely,” he admits. “I want kids. And I want to have them with you one day.”
His boldness should freak me out, even a little, but instead, a rush of warmth fills me and I give him a squeeze.
“I’ll do it all in order,” he clarifies, as if I thought he wouldn’t. “Once we tell everyone we’re seeing one another—and they get over it.”
“I know you will. And I hope they get over it.”
“They’re going to have to.”
“Okay then,” I say with a soft laugh.
“We’ll give them time to have McKenna’s wedding. And we can wait a few weeks after that for the dust to settle,” he says. “Then I’m going to talk to Jace.”
“And ask for my hand?” I tease.
He chuckles. “Not yet.”
“Cody! Don’t you dare ever ask Jace for my hand in marriage.”
He laughs a full laugh. “I’ll ask your dad when the time comes.”
“Good. I can only imagine how Jace would handle that. He’d probably make you go through some sort of challenge course, the likes of which you’ve never seen. If you can reach the gauntlet, you win me like some prize sow.”
Cody laughs hard. “I’m a firefighter. I’ve run the gauntlet. I say, bring it.”
“No.”
“Okay. Okay.” He kisses the top of my head. “But you’re good with us telling everyone after the wedding?”
“I’m so ready to tell everyone. I think it almost slipped to McKenna twice and my mom once.”
“I’ll miss this,” he says, tugging me close.
“Hanging out in the back of our pickups?”
“Yeah.”
“Who says we have to stop?”
A smile spreads across his face. “I like that. We can still sneak out here. No one needs to know.”
“Yeah. It’s our spot.”
“Our spot,” he smiles and I rest my head on his shoulder.
After that, our conversation drifts to the wedding and other things. We talk and kiss and hold one another for hours.
I yawn and Cody pulls out his phone. The sky isn’t light, but it’s the kind of dark that says the sun will rise in an hour or so.
“It’s late,” he says softly.
“Or early,” I say with another yawn.
“I don’t want to leave you, but I think we have to go,” he says.
“Yeah, duty calls,” I agree.
Cody tugs me close and we snuggle and then he kisses me. We’re not rushing even though time is not our friend. He kisses me like a man in love, and I kiss him back with my whole heart.
When we separate, he scoots down the truck bed and holds his hand out to me. I put my hand in his and jump down.
“I can’t wait to take you out riding again,” he says out of the blue.
“Poor Lark has been neglected. She’s fine. She just hasn’t been on a good ride in a while—not unless you count the other night when I met you at the fence line. And I think she was just confused then.”
“Jasper either,” he laments. “I ride him for work, and I took him out that night, but I haven’t just let loose and taken him out over the hills since you and I went out.”
“We’ll get back to riding,” he promises.
I’m sure he’s assuring himself as much as he’s promising me.
“We will,” I agree. I let out a breath.
Cody pulls me into a hug. The sky is lighter now. The sun hasn’t risen, but we stayed out here all night.
He watches me climb up into my truck and drive away.
I yawn a few times on the drive home. Today is going to be a challenge, but I can probably grab a few hours of sleep to tide me over. It was worth it to get time alone with Cody.
I drive up the main driveway. A truck approaches from the other direction. Maybe it’s Chet. I dim my lights and slow, tugging to the side of the driveway. The truck passes.
It’s Jace.
Maybe he didn’t see me.
He keeps driving. I pull away and start driving toward the road that leads out to my cabin. I look into my rear view, letting out a breath.
Then, he does a U-turn.
He pulls up next to me. I lower my window.
“Where have you been?” he asks. His voice is tight, his brow furrowed.
“Jace, I’m twenty-six,” I say. “I don’t need a chaperone.”
“You’re my sister,” he says with a sigh. “It’s my job to watch out for you.”
“I’m fine,” I assure him.
He runs his hand through his hair. “Are you coming out to the barn this morning?”
“Yes. I just need a few hours’ sleep.”
He studies me for a beat and then he nods once.
“Thanks for looking out for me,” I tell him.
He doesn’t smile. He just says, “Always will.”
We roll our windows up and I drive to my cabin.
We’ll tell Jace. Cody’s right. And I’ll tell McKenna.
After the wedding. We need to come clean. It's time.