Chapter 32 Cody
Cody
Grow old along with me; the best is yet to be.
~ Robert Browning
I’m up early, in the kitchen, helping Mom throw together a breakfast for the wedding party.
I tossed and turned last night, resisting the urge to call or text Carli every time I woke.
What I told her was right. Even though no one would hear our call or see our texts, we need to honor McKenna by keeping a distance between us for now. The wedding needs to be the focus.
“How are you holding up?” Mom asks.
I guess McKenna told her about me and Carli.
“I’m fine. It’s my sister’s wedding. I’m happy for her.”
“You’re a good brother, Cody,” Mom’s voice holds an extra layer of kindness.
“I am—even when I screw up royally.”
“People hurt one another. That’s part of being in relationships.” She gives me a look I can only describe as The Mom Look. “What matters is what you do to make up for your blunder after you hurt someone. Showing up for the cleanup makes all the difference.”
I don’t have a chance to say anything else because people start streaming into the kitchen, grabbing plates and filling them with mini quiches, breakfast potatoes and fruit.
I step out the back door. I need a minute to myself.
My chest feels tight, like I’m carrying extra weight there. I take a deep breath and let it out. Then I glance around at the barn and the surrounding yard.
The ranch is transformed. Everywhere you look, cream banners and twinkle lights, chalkboard signs and white flowers have turned the property into a dreamland.
Despite last night’s explosion, I smile.
Today, McKenna’s life changes in the best of ways. I see how Westley loves her. They’re good for one another. And I’m going to show up for that—for her.
I walk around the side of the house—standing in the same place I hid in the shadows, sneaking out to invite Carli to meet up with me in secret.
Jace shows up with Carli, both of them arriving in his truck. He exits the pickup as if he’s on security detail. Any other day I’d be teasing him about it, covering my ear like I was speaking into a secret service mouthpiece and asking him if the eagle has landed.
I stand off to the side of the porch, watching the two of them ascend the steps together. Carli doesn’t see me at first, but Jace turns and our eyes meet. He holds the door open for Carli, ushering her inside. Then he backs out and walks back down the steps in my direction.
The air around us is stiff. My chest tightens the closer he gets. I don’t know how to repair this fracture—I can’t lose my best friend, especially not over my choice to love his sister.
“Hey,” I say.
Jace tips his chin. No words.
“Do you want to do this now?” I ask him. “It can wait or we can talk. Whatever you want.”
“What I want?”
“I know. You didn’t get a vote here. And I’m sorry.”
He’s quiet. I know him. And I see all the layers.
That’s what kills me.
“Now’s as good as anytime,” Jace says.
I had a whole speech planned, explaining how and why. Telling him how much I love his sister. None of that seems sufficient now that we’re face to face.
“I’m sorry,” I say, simply. And I hold his gaze.
My skin feels hot and uncomfortable, but I don’t look away.
“My sister?” he asks.
“I love her.”
He narrows his eyes and studies me as if he could sniff out any falsehood.
“You love her?”
“I do. I’ve liked her for a long time—been attracted to her.”
He winces slightly. Man, I’m not doing this right.
“She’s amazing. And I kept my distance out of respect for you. I thought it would pass—my feelings for her. But I only …” I blow out a breath. “I couldn’t get over her. I love her.”
“So you said,” he says with a nearly imperceptible quirk of his mouth.
“You’re my best friend—as close as a brother,” I tell him. “We’ve always had each other’s backs.”
He nods.
“I would do anything for you,” I tell him. “I’d probably even die for you.”
His face shows no emotion, but then it softens slightly and he nods.
“I’m not giving her up,” I say. “Not even for you.”
I swallow hard.
My words surprise me for a moment—but they’re true.
Jace’s head pulls back slightly. He didn’t expect me to say what I did.
“I didn’t mean for you to find out like you did. We were going to tell you after farrowing—after the wedding.”
“I know. Carli told me on the ride over here.”
I nod.
“Today’s about McKenna,” Jace says. “Let’s focus on that.”
“That’s the plan,” I agree.
His lips thin and he stares at me for a beat and then he turns and we walk up the front steps together.
I’ll give him time. That’s the least I can do. Hopefully, he’ll come around.
I tuck everything else away and focus on where I’m needed for the rest of the day.
McKenna and the bridesmaids are getting ready in her cabin, and the groomsmen in the main house.
The string quartet, band, DJ and wedding coordinator arrive. And then guests start filling chairs in the late afternoon.
Before I know it, I’m on the back porch with the other groomsmen. The bridesmaids all parade in front of us, walking to their spot on the other side of the barn.
Carli looks up at us.
Our eye contact lands. I hold her with my gaze. She smiles a shy smile and keeps walking, following the other bridesmaids.
I meant every word I said to Jace. He matters more than he probably knows.
She matters more.
Blaire approaches the porch and ushers us to the front of the lawn where the arch Luke and I made is draped with gauzy material and flowers.
I take my place at the end of the groomsmen.
The string quartet starts to play.
Westley walks up and in front of the arch next to the pastor.
The bridesmaids walk up the aisle one by one. When Carli rounds the barn, my eyes tear up. She’s beautiful. I discreetly rub under my eye with my thumb.
Her eyes meet mine and she smiles. My smile breaks out like a bird that’s been caged.
The music changes and my sister comes around the corner, her arm linked in Dad’s.
She’s smiling so widely it’s like she swallowed the sun.
She glances at her guests briefly but her eyes keep returning to Westley.
I look over at him. He’s wiping tears. And then he lets out a full-blown sob.
If any of us had any hesitation as to whether he’s the one for her, he just sealed the deal.
When Dad hands McKenna off to Westley, he wipes tears. We’re all crying or trying not to at this point. I glance at Mom. She’s got a handkerchief out, dabbing her cheeks.
Carli and I didn’t ruin this day. And it’s not about us in the least. McKenna and Westley are the only thing on anyone’s mind right now.
They read their vows to one another. I only understand about half of what they say because they weave private jokes between their promises. Their voices carry across the lawn, steady and sure. Around me, the guests sit silently, as if they’re collectively holding their breath.
The pastor smiles and raises his voice. “I now pronounce you man and wife.” Then he says, “You may kiss the bride.”
Westley dips my sister in a dramatic kiss that’s so them—the social media influencer and the Hollywood director.
The guests burst into applause.
Dustin whoops and shouts, “That’s what I’m talkin’ about!”
And then my sister and her new husband run down the aisle, hand in hand.
The wedding party files out in pairs. My eyes are on Carli until she slips out of sight around the side of the barn.
As soon as we’re past the rows of chairs, I aim for the last spot I saw Carli.
The photographer, Bryce, approaches me. “Family photos, Cody. Could you head back to the arch on the lawn?”
I glance in the direction where Carli disappeared. “Yeah. Sure. Coming.”
I turn around and head to the lawn. Guests are mingling. McKenna and Westley are there already. My brothers and I gather with Mom and Dad. Bryce shoots a bunch of shots and then the wedding party joins us, but we’re separated—groomsmen and then bridesmaids.
When the photo shoot is almost over, I start to walk toward Carli.
Blaire holds her finger in the air and says, “Okay, everyone, I need you to head straight into the barn. We’ll have the first dance, toasts and then dinner can be served. We don’t want the guests getting restless.”
Carli smiles over at me and shrugs.
I practically laugh. It feels like I won’t be able to get within twenty feet of her for the rest of the night. If this is karma, I’m not a fan.
McKenna and Westley have their first dance. The wedding party is consigned to the same seats we had during the reception, which means Carli might as well be a mile away on the other side of the barn. Dinner is served, a catered meal, so we all remain seated.
We take turns giving speeches for the toasts during the meal. My brothers and I do a group toast which ends up drawing a lot of laughs.
After dinner, all the guests remain seated while McKenna and Dad have the Father/Bride dance and then Westley and his mom do a really fun Groom/Mother dance with a bunch of moves that look like they’re straight off TikTok.
When the wedding party joins the dance floor, we have to dance with the bridesmaid we escorted down the aisle, so I end up dancing with Winona while Benji holds Carli and sways to the music.
I’m not a jealous man. And I’m not jealous of Benji.
But I am jealous of his hand, the way he places it on her back.
That should be my hand. And I’m jealous of the palm that’s respectfully holding her other hand.
I should be touching her now. And I’m jealous of the polite smile she’s giving him.
She should be smiling at me. I sway Winona and she teases me about Carli.
“Eyes on me, Cody.” She giggles.
“Happy to be your entertainment tonight, Winona.”
“You are!” She laughs again. “This is payback for you two keeping the rest of us in the dark.”
“Wait ‘til you love someone,” I threaten—but it’s an empty threat and she knows it.
I hope the whole world falls in love. I just want Carli in my arms before the night is out.
The song winds down and the DJ starts the next one. He shouts, “Okay, everyone! Let’s get this party started!” and finally, we’re allowed to mingle. I look around for Blaire or Bryce. No one’s heading my way to cut me off.
I glance at Jace. His face is an impenetrable mask. I take a breath and cross the room.
McKenna walks toward the stage where the band and DJ are set up for the night.
I step up next to Carli. She gasps when I take her hand in mine. Then she turns and smiles at me.
I lead her toward the front of the barn where the band and DJ are set up.
“May I have the mic?” McKenna asks the DJ.
“What’s going on?” Carli asks.
The DJ hands the mic over to McKenna and dims the music. She nods at me with a wide smile, handing the mic out to me and walking back to Westley. He pulls her into his side.
The room quiets, conversations stilling and all eyes fixing on me and Carli.
“What are you doing?” Carli whispers.
I drop to one knee.
Her hand flies up to her mouth.
I bring the mic to my mouth and say, “Carli Buckner, I love you. And I have something I want to ask you tonight—here, in front of everyone.”
Her eyes go wide. She might kill me for this later. But we’ve been in hiding too long.
I smile up at her. “My life is better because you’re in it. I’m a better man because of you. Will you be my girlfriend?”
“Your …” She bursts out laughing. And then she shouts, “Yes!”
I stand and pull her into my arms. Lifting the mic behind her back, I say, “Carry on, everyone.”
The crowd breaks into applause. Some people are laughing. Dustin shouts, “That’s how it’s done, people!”
I hand the mic back to the DJ and pull Carli into my arms.
At last.