Chapter 22
Danica
M y eyes strayed to the clock again and I sighed. I had the kids working on group projects, mostly just so that I could distract myself and not have to answer as many questions.
I’d asked Smoke if he wanted me to take the day off to go sit with them while they waited to hear what the judge would say. He’d told me he’d rather I stayed home. That wasn’t an option. It was either work, or the court, so here I was, waiting to hear what happened.
“Mrs. Carmine?” Sean asked, a secretive smile playing over his face.
“Yes, Sean?”
“Are we still doing show and tell after lunch?”
“We are. Do you have something to show today?” I loved this kid. He was bright, inquisitive, and seeing him at the clubhouse daily had just reinforced everything I thought about him.
“Yup,” he said with a grin.
“Okay, great. Just as soon as everyone is back in the classroom we’ll begin. You can start us off.”
“Thanks, Mrs. Carmine!” he scampered back to his group.
I floated around the room, helping where I was needed and obsessively checking the clock.
Once the kids left for lunch, I tried calling Smokehouse.
The preliminary court hearing between the judge, DA, and my mom and sister should be over by now.
It was making me nervous that I hadn’t heard anything yet.
When Smoke’s voicemail picked up, I sighed and ended the call. Tapping the phone against my forehead, I debated about my next move. “Screw it,” I muttered and hit another number.
“Hey, Dani,” Kit said as she answered.
“Hi. Sorry if I’m bothering you. I know you worked a late shift at the bar last night.”
“You’re never bothering me. I’m assuming you’re hoping I’ve heard from the guys?”
“Have you?” I couldn’t keep the hope out of my voice.
Her laugh was soft and understanding. “No, unfortunately, nothing yet. Is it supposed to take this long?”
“It could,” I told her, “if the judge wanted to talk to the guys. Or if Fremont puts up a fight.”
“Damn.”
“Yeah,” I sighed. The bell rang and I groaned. “Sorry, I have to go. Hopefully we hear soon.”
“See you tonight, Dani.”
We hung up right as kids started piling back into my classroom. Everyone was laughing and chatting and I waited for their attention. I never yelled or demanded. Just sat quietly waiting until a hush fell over the room. It worked every time. And more quickly than most realized.
“We’re going to do our weekly show and tell today. How many of you have something?” Three hands went up. “Perfect. Sean, why don’t you start us off?”
I sat behind my desk and waited for him to go to the back of the room where the cubbies were. A frown grew on my face as he went to the door of the classroom and poked his head out.
“Okay,” he hissed.
Standing in alarm, I hurried over to the door. The kids weren’t supposed to bring anyone in without permission and I hadn’t realized his show and tell was a person.
I didn’t make it to the door before Ricochet, Smokehouse, and Hellfire sauntered in.
They’d changed out of their suits and were back in their leather cuts, jeans, and boots.
They looked exactly like what they were, dangerous bikers.
My jaw dropped. Smokehouse winked at me, but focused on Sean as the boy launched into his speech.
I was left floundering. I wanted to demand to know how long they’d known Sean was bringing them in for show and tell. The need to pepper Smoke with questions about what had happened at the hearing was clawing at me. Them not being in jail was a good sign.
“This is my Uncle Ricochet, and his friends, Smokehouse, and Hellfire.”
There were giggles from the girls in the class. Oh Good Lord, I was going to have to answer a million questions from the principal, possibly school board, and definitely from angry soccer moms about this. “They were all military members. They got to shoot guns, drive tanks, and blow things up.”
Crap.
It was too late to stop this little performance, so I tried to steer it toward a more educational route. “What branch of the military were you gentlemen in?” I prompted, widening my eyes at them. Hopefully we could sideline the blowing things up portion of this story.
The smile that Smokehouse flashed me had heat creeping over my body. Suddenly, all I could picture was him, lying between my thighs with his face buried in my-
Shaking off the wild thoughts, I listened while the men explained what positions they’d held and what tasks they’d been responsible for.
Each time my mind tried to stray back to the image of Smoke in bed, I willfully shoved it aside.
The kids peppered the men with questions, and I was grateful that the guys kept everything PG.
Even I was sucked into some of the stories they told about the shenanigans they’d gotten up to while deployed.
“Why are you all dressed the same?” Heather, an inquisitive little girl, asked.
Before they were able to answer, Brandi piped up. “Are you on a team of some kind?”
“We’re not on a team,” Ricochet said with a chuckle. “We’re in a club.”
“What kind of club?” Hank asked with a frown.
I cringed as I saw where this was going, but Smoke stopped me from shutting down the conversation.
“It’s a club where we have common interests. We’re all friends, just like we were with the guys from the military,” he explained.
“Is everyone in the club a man?” Tiffany asked.
“Yes, but we have girlfriends and wives,” Hellfire replied. “They like to hang around, too.”
“You’re all married?” Jill asked, disappointment filling her features. “Too bad, you’re all very handsome.” She batted her eyes at Smokehouse.
The grin that crept over his face had me shooting an irritated look at him.
The guys were getting a kick out of this.
And why wouldn’t they? The boys in the class all had hero worship written all over their faces and the little girls were all experiencing what had to be their first crushes.
In all fairness, I couldn’t blame them. These three guys were drop dead gorgeous.
“That’s enough for today,” I called out.
“Spoilsport,” Smoke muttered.
I hadn’t realized he’d edged closer to me. Rolling my eyes with a smile on my face, I continued, “Thank Ricochet, Hellfire, and Smokehouse for coming to talk to us.”
The class chorused out a thank you. The bell cut them off and the mad dash to rush out the door took over. By the time all the kids, including Sean, left the classroom I was nearly vibrating with curiosity.
“What happened?” I asked, a bit breathless with worry and hope.
“Your mom is amazing,” Ricochet said with a grin.
“Got the judge to agree that there wasn’t really a case to go on. Especially since we were leaving and Eli came after us with a knife and restarted the confrontation.”
“I thought they said that would look like self-defense?” I asked.
“She managed to word it in a way that, combined with everything else, made the judge dismiss the case. He basically told us that he didn’t want to see us again,” Smoke told me with a shrug.
The excited squeal I’d been holding back burst out of me, startling the guys as I launched myself into Smokehouse’s arms. “I’m so relieved,” I laughed as I squeezed him.
He shifted, bundling me closer, but a quick look up showed him giving the other men a confused look. Almost like he was saying, ‘See? This is what I’m talking about. Why does she do this?’
Sighing to myself, I released him and backed up.
I didn’t want to make him uncomfortable.
Being this demonstrative was the old me.
The fact that I felt safe enough to do this with him was a big eye opener for me.
I trusted Smokehouse completely, even though he seemed uneasy each time I did something to show my gratitude.
I’d been hoping that after yesterday he’d relax a little.
It amazed me that he could do such dirty and delicious things to me, but a hug made him look like he wanted to run.
Yet if I made any motion for the door, he’d clamp onto me and keep me from going. It made my head spin.
It didn’t matter, I decided. For too long I’d locked this part of me up into a small box. Not because Eli never wanted hugs, but because deep down, I hadn’t trusted him. Not fully. How had I never realized that before? The woman I’d been while I was his wife had been a reserved shell of herself.
I’d missed the old me and was glad to see her coming back.
And even if Smoke wasn’t comfortable with the way I showed my gratitude, it was all I had.
I’d have given anything to be the one to walk into that courtroom today and get them off the hook.
That just wasn’t me. Never had been. The closest I’d been able to come was calling my mom and sister.
Smoke was studying me as though I was a bug under a microscope, while his friends watched him just as hard.
I wasn’t sure what was going on here, but my gut told me it had more to do with him than me.
Until he asked me to stop, I didn’t plan on it.
I wanted to touch him. To get to know him.
I wanted him , though I didn’t dare say that out loud for fear of sending him running toward the hills.
Was it stupid to fall for the first guy I was with after a long painful marriage? Yup. Was it stupid to fall for a womanizer? Absolutely. Did my heart care? One hundred percent, no. I was already starting to fall for the man and we’d only lived together for a couple weeks.
It was the small things he did. The thoughtful gifts he brought me when I wasn’t feeling well. The protective streak that was a mile wide. The way he made sure to help me in the kitchen, even if it was something as small as dishing my plate for me, or cleaning up after I’d cooked.
I wasn’t letting him go. I wasn’t sure when I had made that decision. Maybe just now. He was more of a man then Eli ever was, more than I had ever thought I would love. I was going to make this work.
“We’ll give you two a few minutes,” Ricochet said. Hellfire was already halfway out the door.
I smiled at Smokehouse. “I’m so glad this went well. It was really worrying me.”
“Same, Wildcat. Thanks again for calling in backup.” He took a step back, shoving his hands into his pockets.
Laughing, I shook my head. “It’s the least I could do.” I nibbled my lower lip, hesitant to bring this up, but I needed to know if we were going to move forward. “I know I said I wanted us to get to know each other without getting sex involved… Yesterday-”
“Shouldn’t have happened,” Smoke replied, cutting me off.
It was like a punch to my gut and the breath whooshed out of me. I took a moment to gather my courage, wrapping it around me like armor. “You’ve changed your mind? You don’t want to have sex with me?”
Smoke looked shocked. That eased my bruised pride a little.
“What? No. I mean, yes, I want to have sex with you.” He whispered the last part, looking around to make sure there were no kids or teachers in earshot.
Despite the tough exterior, he still knew better.
He fumbled with words, trying to explain his meaning.
“You asked to move forward without that. I should have respected that. Had more self-control.”
Tilting my head, I studied his handsome face. Was that it? Had he been so overcome by his desire for me that he couldn’t keep his hands off me? Lord knew I was having a hard time doing the same. He enticed me in a way that no one ever had. “What if I’ve changed my mind?”
His eyes narrowed. “Don’t fuck with me, Dani.”
I tried to smother the laugh that bubbled up, but it was too powerful. “You think I’m messing with you? ”
He seemed to be debating over how to respond. “It’s probably best not to rock the boat,” he finally said.
My mouth dropped open in shock. Hurt was a centripetal force, causing me to take a few steps away from him.
He was allowed to not want me. I wasn’t some seductress bent on ensnaring him.
I’d just hoped that maybe I’d finally had a run of good luck.
That I’d managed to find my person. The one person put on this planet for me. It certainly hadn’t been Eli.
“Okay,” I whispered.
“Dani,” he took a step forward, his hand outstretched as though he were going to stop my retreat from him, but the bell interrupted whatever he’d been about to say.
“Recess is over. You need to go.”
“Shit. I fucked this up. Let’s talk tonight?”
Mouth flattening into a grim line, I nodded. I would have agreed to anything to get him out of there. I needed time to pull myself together. He’d just taken my offer of further intimacy and crushed it beneath the huge work boot he was wearing.
Maybe it was what I deserved. You couldn’t force a wild animal to accept you. Not in a few weeks’ time anyway. And Smoke was as wild as they came. He was used to doing anything, and everything, he wanted to do. Used to women tossing themselves at him. No wonder it was so easy for him to reject me.
He gave me one of his usual intense stares, as though he could read my mind if he just concentrated enough, then left my classroom.
From fooling around in bed to utter rejection.
Why couldn’t I seem to figure this man out?
Shaking my head, I stowed the hurt away deep inside and forced a smile on my lips as the kids piled back into the room.
I’d gotten entirely too good at faking happiness.
I was damn sick of it. Was it too much to ask to want some of the real thing?