5. Samantha
5
SAMANTHA
S amantha stood in the warehouse-sized baby supply store on Route One, watching Wolf and Amelia stand side by side, studying the big map by the entrance.
They looked like they were planning a jewel heist, not just buying some baby supplies. Something about the way the two of them both frowned so seriously at the map made her smile.
Wolf pointed to something, and Amelia shook her head and pointed at another section. He nodded in agreement like they had some sort of telepathy.
“Formula first,” Amelia said, turning back to Sam. “Then diapers, carriers, strollers, clothing, and books.”
“In order of necessity,” Sam guessed. It definitely wasn’t in order of the store layout. But she reminded herself that according to his file, planning efficient supply routes had been one of Wolf Cassidy’s strengths, so he probably had a good reason.
“Exactly,” Wolf said with a crisp nod. “We don’t know how much time we’ll have.”
That was a fair point. The baby was only a few months old. He might melt down at the drop of a hat.
“How long since he’s had a meal or a diaper change?” Sam asked.
“Otto’s secretary gave him a new diaper right before I headed to your office,” Wolf replied. “So I guess about an hour ago?”
“And a meal?” Sam asked.
“I didn’t think to ask them,” Wolf said, frowning down at the little one.
Ezra peeked out from Wolf’s chest, his eyes wide as he took in the sound of the Christmas music on the speakers and the bright lights of the shop. For now at least, he seemed like he was just fine.
“Well, we’ll just aim to get what he needs quickly,” Sam said.
Amelia took off at a brisk walking pace toward the aisle that said Formula with Wolf at her heels.
Samantha grabbed a cart and followed.
“Do you know what kind he was taking before?” Sam asked Wolf quietly when she caught up.
“No,” he said. “Does it matter?”
“It might, if he has any allergies,” she told him. “You’ll want to get in touch with his pediatrician as soon as you can find out who that was. They should have a record of what kind of formula he was eating, any sensitivities, his vaccinations—basically everything.”
“That’s a good idea,” Wolf said. “I’ll see what I can find out. I feel terrible that I don’t know much…”
“Here,” Amelia said, holding out a large jar of formula.
“Why that one?” Wolf asked.
“It’s the most expensive one,” Amelia said. “That means it’s probably the best.”
“Good thinking,” Wolf agreed.
“Not necessarily,” Sam said, scanning the shelves. “Here. This one is what you used to have, Amelia.”
“It’s cheaper,” Wolf noticed.
“My mom wouldn’t have given Amelia anything but the best,” Sam said firmly.
“This one, then,” he said with a grim smile, putting the other one back on the shelf.
“Diapers,” Amelia announced, heading off again.
Wolf smiled down at Sam and they followed together.
“I don’t know what size he wears,” he admitted.
“You should probably get him twos and threes to be sure,” Sam said. “If the threes are too big, he can grow into them. And if the twos are too small, you can donate them.”
“How do you know all this?” he asked, quirking an eyebrow.
“I was thirteen when Amelia was born,” she said, smiling fondly at the memory. “I was completely in love from the moment she was born, and I was obsessed with taking care of her. I used to do her shopping with my parents too. Mom used to say it was like having a free babysitter in the house.”
Wolf nodded, his expression neutral.
It hit her what he was thinking, and the thought smarted.
“I don’t feel like a free babysitter,” she said tightly. “If that’s what you’re thinking. I’m really glad to have my sister with me. She’s my whole world.”
“I can tell,” he said, his blue eyes solemn as he looked down at her. “That’s not what I was thinking at all. I was just thinking how lucky it was that I bumped into the right two people today.”
“You really picked him up and came straight to your meeting with me?” Sam asked, still unable to believe it.
“I was kind of on autopilot,” he admitted. “And we had an appointment.”
He was practically in shock, she thought to herself. First, the tragic news about his friend, and then being handed a baby out of the blue like that…
“I’m sorry about your friend,” she said. “You must have been really close for him to leave Ezra with you.”
“Not exactly,” Wolf said, wincing. “I mean, we used to be, but I hadn’t seen him in years. And I’m worried that he only left Ezra with me because he thought Angela was in the picture. But now…”
“You were with her for years ?” Sam asked, more than a little shocked. The woman on the phone hadn’t exactly sounded like she’d been super invested in the relationship.
Wolf nodded slowly.
“You’ve had quite a day,” she said, shaking her head.
“ Diapers ,” Amelia announced.
Sam watched as Wolf and Amelia examined the various brands. Given everything he had been through, his manner was surprisingly calm and focused.
“Which one, Sam?” Amelia asked at last.
“I’d go with this one,” Sam, said, pointing to the biggest brand name on the shelf. “They cost a little more, but they’re almost foolproof, so they’re great for a beginner.”
“Perfect,” Amelia said.
“ Almost foolproof?” Wolf asked, looking a little horrified.
“One package of size two, and one of size three, Amelia,” Sam said, trying not to laugh. “You’ll get really good at changing him in no time, Wolf. I promise.”
She grabbed a pack of wipes and a tube of diaper cream and put them in the cart too.
“Carriers,” Amelia said, throwing the two packages of diapers into the cart and taking off again.
Sam and Wolf followed after her with the cart. The aisle with the slings and carriers wasn’t far from the diapers. They pulled up next to Amelia, who was carefully studying the options.
“These are kind of expensive,” Sam suggested. “Maybe you’ll want to wait and see if they already have one for him.”
“Maybe,” Wolf said.
“No way,” Amelia chimed in. “You’re like the biggest person I’ve ever met. We need to find one that fits you.”
Wolf only chuckled.
“That’s a good point, Amelia,” Sam said, impressed. “You need one that’s comfortable and easy for you to get him in and out of.”
“Do you want to take him so I can try?” Wolf asked.
“Sure,” Sam said, completely delighted at the prospect of holding the adorable baby again, and hoping she wasn’t being super obvious about it.
“Okay, Ezra,” Wolf said gently. “Let’s go see Samantha.”
This time, when he handed her the baby, instead of just focusing on keeping him warm, she drank in his sweet weight and incredible baby smell.
Happily, his diaper didn’t seem too wet. They were moving quickly through the store, so with any luck, they could get him changed and fed soon. Wolf didn’t seem to really understand how often a baby needed food and a fresh diaper, but Sam remembered only too well how quickly Amelia used to melt down.
“Can we open this?” Amelia asked a worker who was walking past.
“Knock yourself out, kid,” the man said without stopping.
“This one looks good,” Amelia said, holding up a box that showed a big man with a bushy beard and a tiny baby strapped to his chest.
“ Ahh, ” Ezra said, one fist closing on a hank of Sam’s hair.
“Yes,” she told him quietly. “Yes, we’re going to find a nice, comfy carrier for you.”
“ Ahh, ” he said again, opening his mouth as if he had more to say, but wasn’t fully in control of whether or not a sound came out.
“How in the world—?” Wolf began.
“Here, let me help you,” a woman’s voice said.
Sam looked up to see a female employee smiling at Wolf a little too widely.
For some reason, Sam felt a little twinge of jealousy. She swallowed it back, surprised at herself, and watched the woman help Wolf with the carrier. In fairness, Sam hadn’t adjusted one in so long that she wasn’t even sure they would have figured it out on their own.
“There you are,” the woman said triumphantly as she looked him over.
“Thank you,” Wolf said gruffly.
The woman hurried away, as if she sensed that there were more people in baby-related emergencies elsewhere in the store.
“That looks good,” Amelia said.
“Let’s put the baby in and see what he thinks,” Sam suggested.
She felt a little sad about surrendering Ezra, but she knew it was important for him to try it out.
“Do we have to?” Wolf asked. “It fits.”
“We have to see how that carrier distributes his weight,” Sam said, heading over with the baby. “You don’t want to have a backache after five minutes.”
“He’s tiny,” Wolf scoffed.
“He won’t be forever,” Sam told him. “Besides, you’d be amazed how quickly they can get heavy. Here you go.”
“Aren’t you going to do it?” Wolf asked.
“You’ll want to be able to do it yourself,” she told him. “If it’s too hard to get him in and out, then we should pick a different one.”
She watched the big man maneuver his little charge into the carrier, his massive hand completely covering the little one’s back as he snapped the pieces into place with Ezra facing his chest.
“Is that it?” Wolf asked nervously, keeping both hands on the baby like he didn’t completely trust the carrier to support him.
“Let me have a look,” Sam told him, moving closer to examine the carrier. The baby looked cozy, and his little head was perfectly positioned to have plenty of air. “It looks right, but I’ll stay right here while you let go.”
Amelia moved closer too, and all three of them seemed to hold their breath as Wolf released one hand and then the other.
Baby Ezra remained snuggled safe against his chest.
“Now just move around a little,” Sam said. “We’ll stay with you.”
Wolf twisted and turned, and the baby stayed right where he was.
“This thing is great,” Wolf said.
“Well, why don’t you keep wearing him while we finish shopping,” Sam suggested. “Then you’ll really know if it feels good.”
“Good plan,” Wolf said.
“Strollers,” Amelia announced.
Sam put the box for the carrier in the cart and the three of them headed off. She couldn’t help but notice that even with the carrier, Wolf kept his big hand cradled protectively around the baby’s bottom, as if to reassure himself that nothing would happen to Ezra.
“Are you sure you need a stroller?” she asked him. “It would be weird if they didn’t already have a stroller for him.”
“It could have been in the car,” he said, then frowned.
Sam’s heart sank and she nodded.
“We’ll find you a simple umbrella stroller for now,” she told him. “Then you can do your homework and choose a really nice one for long walks.”
“Long walks,” Wolf echoed, the corners of his mouth curving upward slightly, as if he were pleased at the idea that a long walk with a baby might be in his future.
Sam grabbed a bottle of baby-safe laundry detergent from an aisle cap on their way, and Wolf nodded before she put it in the cart. When they reached the strollers, they grabbed an umbrella stroller and kept moving to the clothing section.
“We’ll just grab one or two things,” Wolf said. “And then I can check out the books.”
“You’ll need more than one or two things,” Sam pointed out. “Unless you get unpacked really quickly. He should have at least five onesies, two blanket sleepers, and a couple of blankets.”
“He already has a nice blanket,” Wolf pointed out.
“Well, yes,” she replied. “But what happens when it gets poop on it?”
Amelia giggled.
“It will get poop on it?” Wolf asked in horror. “But we bought him diapers.”
“ Everything will get poop on it,” Sam said, trying not to smile. “Even the good diapers don’t always keep it all in.”
Amelia giggled some more, and Sam winked at her.
“Okay,” Wolf said. “We’ll get a lot of everything.”
But Ezra had begun to wiggle in his carrier and make little noises.
“What does he want?” Wolf asked. “Are you hungry, boy?”
“He’s probably ready for a fresh diaper and a bottle,” Sam agreed sympathetically. “He did very well tonight between our meeting and this shopping trip.”
“I guess no books,” Amelia said sadly.
“But I’m going to need books,” Wolf said, looking up in a panic. “I don’t know how to take care of him.”
He wasn’t wrong.
“You two go check out the books,” Sam told them. “I’ll just grab what he needs from here and we can meet in checkout. We probably have two to three minutes until he freaks out. But if you want that much time, you have to keep moving, Wolf.”
“You walk with him. I’ll grab books to show you,” Amelia suggested.
The two of them disappeared with the baby in the direction of the books, leaving Sam alone in the clothing section.
She quickly chose some onesies, pants, booties, hats, blankets, and blanket sleepers for the little one, and then pushed the cart over toward the checkout line, passing the book section on her way.
True to her word, Amelia was trotting after Wolf, reading out the titles of the books in her arms as he nodded.
By the time she made it to the line, they were right on her heels. She noticed how full the cart was as they added a small stack of books to the items already inside.
She bit her lip, thinking of the cost of everything in that cart.
If Wolf Cassidy was newly home and didn’t have a job yet, he might not be in a great position to pay for all this stuff.
She snuck a glance at him over her shoulder. He was already bent over one of the books with Amelia, the two of them seemingly in a speed-reading contest. He didn’t look at all worried.
Maybe he doesn’t realize how expensive baby stuff is…
She found herself playing with the zipper on her bag. She knew she couldn’t really buy all this stuff herself. But Captain Anderson had given her a debit card for petty cash expenditures .
When she asked what that meant, he’d explained that it was in case the office or any of the vets needed anything quickly. Anything under a thousand dollars you don’t need my approval, that’s why you have this card, he’d said.
In her own mind she’d thought that meant paying for office supplies, or maybe for a night at the local inn and a few necessities for a new veteran who arrived unexpectedly.
This is the same thing, she thought to herself. This baby arrived unexpectedly. Captain Anderson would want him to have his necessities.
She slipped the card out and then shot off a quick text to the captain.
He probably wouldn’t answer. He spent most of his off-hours these days feverishly preparing for the arrival of his fiancée, who was supposed to get in on Christmas Eve. But she felt better at least trying to get his blessing.
The family in front of her finished checking out and Wolf jogged forward to help Sam get everything onto the conveyor belt.
“Find everything you need?” the young man at the register asked politely.
“I’d say so,” Wolf chuckled.
“Gumballs,” Amelia said dreamily, catching sight of a machine by the doors.
“Go on,” Sam told her, handing her some coins.
“ Awesome ,” Amelia said, sounding like a regular seven-year-old for a minute.
While Wolf was watching after Amelia, Sam handed over the card to the boy at the register, putting her finger to her lips and hoping the boy understood that she wanted him to just run it quickly.
“What are you doing?” Wolf growled suddenly.
“Captain Anderson asks that we do something concrete to help each of our new arrivals get settled quickly,” she said. “It’s part of our mission statement.”
“You’re lying,” Wolf said, narrowing his eyes at her.
It hit her out of the blue that he looked even more handsome than ever when he was angry. Horrified at herself for that inappropriate and unwanted thought, she opened her mouth and closed it again, pretty sure she seemed more like she was lying than ever.
“I’m not,” she told him. “Look at our website if you don’t believe me.”
She had memorized the mission statement the day she got the job. It included the idea that the foundation would provide resources to meet returning veterans’ immediate needs, including personal necessities, housing, and job training.
“Well, you already helped by staying late and coming here with me,” he said, pulling out a wad of cash and handing it to the clerk.
The kid shrugged and handed the card back to Sam.
Her cheeks burned and she felt ashamed. She should have known a man like Wolf Cassidy wouldn’t want her hurting his pride by paying for his things, even if it wasn’t really her paying.
I’ll get better at this job in time, she told herself. I won’t have to learn this lesson more than once.
They pushed the cart out and Amelia joined them, her mouth already a little purple from her gumball.
“You guys okay?” she asked, looking back and forth between them.
“Your sister tried to pay for Ezra’s things,” Wolf said gently.
“With the foundation’s card,” Sam said defensively. “Because it’s what Captain Anderson would want me to do.”
“And for a lot of guys, that would have been a lifesaver,” Wolf said, his voice deep. “But I’m doing just fine with money. What I needed tonight was good advice and company. And you both provided that. So, you can tell Captain Anderson you did just right. As a matter of fact, I’ll tell him myself.”
“Thank you,” Sam said, meaning it.
“He’s sleeping,” Amelia pointed out, her eyes on Ezra.
Sure enough, a bit of snuggling up to Wolf’s warm chest and the rhythm of the big man’s pacing must have been just what Ezra needed to take a little nap.
“We can try to get him out and into his car seat without waking him all the way up,” Sam offered.
“Let’s do that,” Wolf said as they approached the car.
“It probably won’t work,” Sam warned him. “But it’s worth a try.”
On instinct, she began singing “Silent Night,” the last song that had been playing inside the store when they checked out. She kept the song going softly as she took Ezra off Wolf’s chest and swept him into his car seat.
He whimpered a little as she placed him down. But she tucked his warm blanket around him and kept singing for a moment and he settled back in. She froze there for a moment, watching his sweet sleeping face, his lips slightly pursed, like he was nursing.
For a moment, the wholesome sight transported her back across the years to when her baby sister was small like this. Sam would sit in the back next to her with their parents in the front, talking and laughing softly as they drove.
She felt that familiar pang of loss in her chest, and straightened up as she pushed the thoughts away.
“You did it,” Amelia whispered excitedly.
“If he starts waking up while we’re driving, you can rub his belly very softly and sing,” Sam told her. “That’s what I used to do for you when you were little.”
“Okay,” Amelia said. “Don’t worry. I’ll keep an eye on him.”
She darted around the car to slide into the seat next to the baby right away. Sam smiled and headed back to help Wolf load in the things from the cart.
“She’s a great kid,” Wolf said, instantly endearing himself to Sam. “I meant what I said before, I’m grateful to you both.”
“I think she had the time of her life,” Sam told him with a smile. “She’s normally really quiet.”
“Well, I’m glad she wasn’t quiet tonight,” he replied, placing the last bag in the back. “She was a real help.”
She watched as he closed the door.
“So where am I dropping you guys?” he asked.
“I’m not sure we’re done just yet,” she told him.
Sam reminded herself that she was just doing her job, and definitely not making excuses to spend more time with this man who seemed to be instantly at ease with her and her sister.