23. Beau
23
BEAU
B eau tapped on Quinn’s contact again, knowing she wasn’t going to answer. It was dark out now, and he’d been calling and texting since she left.
How did something that seemed so right go so wrong so suddenly?
He’d never been more certain of anything as he was the day he slid his grandmother’s ring on her finger.
Their partnership might have started off as a convenience, but over the last few weeks, his feelings for her had gotten more complicated.
He realized now that he was wrong.
Beau’s feelings for Quinn weren’t complicated at all. In fact, they couldn’t be simpler.
He loved her, and he wanted to marry her.
He knew that like he knew the sun would rise tomorrow.
And he also knew he was too late.
The pretty little engagement ring she’d handed back to him before she ran felt as heavy as an elephant in his pocket, and it was pulling his heart down with it now that the wool was off his eyes.
He was still holding his phone when it began to ring.
“Ma?” he said, picking up.
“It’s coming down pretty hard out there,” she said cheerfully. “Zandy was hoping we could have a snow day sleepover.”
Beau walked over to the big front windows and flicked on the porch light. Sure enough, while he’d been pacing and worrying over Quinn, the snow had been coming down hard and fast.
He thought about her, alone in her little cabin, with the snow falling down around her, and felt a shiver of loneliness go down his spine. He had the urge to run to her, blizzard or not.
She doesn’t want you there…
“Beau?” Mom said.
“Yeah, sorry,” he said. “Of course. Zandy can do a sleepover with you.”
“Great,” Mom said. “And if you and Quinn want to join us, we’ll have your old room and the guest room ready. I doubt she’ll make it back to the cabin at this point, plus it’s no fun being snowed-in alone.”
“Right,” Beau said, his stomach twisting at the idea.
“They’re saying on the news that it’s going to be a doozy,” Mom went on. “We’ll see you two when you get here.”
Beau slid his phone into his pocket, his mind racing.
How was he going to survive being snowed-in away from Quinn, knowing she was alone in that cabin?
He found himself pulling on his boots and coat, and heading out onto the porch.
The wind was blowing, and it was snowing so hard he could barely see the post light glowing at the end of the walkway. He needed something to occupy his mind, and he thought he might just have the perfect thing for that.
Relieved to have something productive to do, he brushed snow off the steps with his boots and tromped through the white stuff to grab his shovel from the side of the house before heading to the big barn.
There was no point staying home feeling sorry for himself. He could sort out the old tractor uninterrupted now. The distraction was just what he needed.
And sometimes, when he was focused on cleaning and caring for an engine, it seemed to lubricate his mind too, and other worries fell into place.
Please call me back, Quinn…
* * *
A few hours later, the tractor’s entire engine was disassembled on the barn floor and Beau’s brain was buzzing with endorphins as he planned to put it all back together after cleaning and examining each component.
The phone finally rang, and he ran over to where it was charging on his tool bench, only then realizing how late it must be.
He’d put logs in the old wood stove, and they had burned down to embers while he worked. The barn cats were all warming themselves near it, and they blinked up at his approach, clearly annoyed at the disturbance.
“ Quinn ,” he said as he picked up.
“Beau?” Mom’s voice on the other end was concerned.
“Sorry, Ma,” he said. “I was working on the tractor.”
“It’s the middle of the night, Beau,” she moaned. “In the middle of a snowstorm. And where is Quinn if she’s not with you?”
Beau looked around the barn. But the cats couldn’t help him with his situation.
“We had an argument,” he heard himself admit. “And she went back to her place, long before the snow got bad.”
“Have you talked to her?” Mom asked. “Made sure she’s okay?”
“I’ve called… a lot,” he said. “I don’t think she wants to talk to me right now.”
Or maybe ever again…
“What did you do, son?” Mom asked, her voice stern.
“It’s complicated,” he said.
“I’ve got nowhere to be,” she told him. “And she’s exactly the kind of daughter-in-law I’ve always dreamed of. I know you’re not about to ruin that for me, are you?”
He opened his mouth to lie to her some more, and then realized with sudden clarity that there was no more point to it.
Besides, even if he somehow convinced Quinn to get back with the plan, he was only going to disappoint her later.
“Beau?” she said softly, before he could reply. “You know I’m only teasing, right, honey? I’ll be sad if it doesn’t work out between you two, but you don’t need a perfect wife or a perfect life for me to love you. I’m a pretty tough cookie. Your father always said so.”
If that wasn’t an invitation to tell the truth, he wasn’t going to get one.
“How would you feel if I told you I didn’t want to work the farm?” Beau heard himself ask.