Chapter 5 Felix
FELIX
“Dude, are you sure you know what you’ve gotten yourself into?”
I pause mid-deadlift, sweat dripping off my chin, and glare at Tyler Bron.
My longtime personal trainer stands a few feet away, hands on his lean hips, wearing baggy shorts, an athletic shirt, and a know-it-all smirk that makes me want to knock him into next Tuesday.
And I could, too. He’s toned, but I’m bigger.
“Stop making this more complicated than it needs to be, Ty.”
He shakes his head, his dark eyes glinting with amusement. “This is Piper Hart we’re talking about. The woman who’s lived rent-free in your head forever.”
“Hardly forever.” I grab a towel and wipe the back of my neck. “I met her at Ian’s wedding last summer.” I should never have told him how much she gets under my skin, or about our one-night stand.
“Right, your sister-in-law,” Tyler says, like I’ve somehow proven his point.
“She’s not my sister-in-law. She’s my brother’s sister-in-law.
We’re not related. Not family.” I toss the towel aside, annoyed at having to explain this again.
“And she doesn’t live rent-free anywhere.
” Trust me, there’s a cost to the mental real estate Piper Hart occupies. One I’m determined to ignore.
“If you say so.”
“I don’t get why you care.” I return to my position for another set. Outside of Ian, Tyler’s my best friend. But he’s going a little heavy on the helicopter mom vibes, if you ask me. “If she hadn’t offered to help, you’d be running me through these workouts holding a two-year-old in your arms.”
The initial plan had been for Tyler to stay with me at the cabin until I figured out childcare for Ellie.
Two men and a baby, minus the Hollywood ending.
But once I mentioned Piper being here, he insisted on staying at his family’s condo near the ski village instead.
They only rent it out during ski season, so it sits empty all summer.
When I told Piper about the change in plans, she’d seemed disappointed.
As if she’d been counting on a buffer between us.
I tried—and mostly failed—not to take offense.
It’s not like I want to play house or pretend this is something more than it is—a lucky break for me and an excuse for her to avoid whatever’s waiting back in Skylark.
I still don’t have the whole story there, and I shouldn’t be so damn curious, but I am.
What would make her quit a job I know she loves?
It can’t just be grief over Max, though I’m not dismissing her loss.
She and Sadie adored that old dog. And even though Ian and I didn’t have pets growing up, I get that kind of devotion.
Pets weren’t Dad’s thing. Not much else other than football could hold his attention.
“I care about your focus, and obsessing over Piper isn’t going to help you keep your eyes on the prize.”
“I’m not fucking obsessed,” I growl. So what if I haven’t been able to get her—and since April, that one night we spent together—out of my mind? I’m not about to admit it to Tyler, but I’d be lying if I told you I haven’t thought about what might happen if she did turn up naked in my bed.
Even if joining her there means enduring the wrath of my older brother. Ian was built for monogamy, even when he thought he wasn’t, so he wouldn’t appreciate me blowing off steam with the woman he now considers his little sister.
Me, on the other hand…I was all about commitment.
Until committing to the wrong women resulted in my heart being trampled not once, not twice, but three times.
First in high school, then college, and most recently with Veronica Bolton, the woman I thought would be my partner in starting our own little football dynasty of baby Barlowes.
That dream was crushed when I found her getting railed by my teammate and supposed friend, Cincinnati’s marquee quarterback, Russ Farmington.
Russ and I were magic on the field. We had the kind of connection the pundits love to talk about. But it all fell apart last season. Every time I saw Russ’s hands on the ball, I also saw his hands all over Ronnie. So when the opportunity in Denver presented itself, I didn’t hesitate.
A thump overhead interrupts my thoughts. What if Ellie fell? Or Piper fainted again? That shit scared the hell out of me yesterday.
My chest tightens, the protective instinct I can’t seem to tamp down flaring. It’s the kind of caveman-coded shit Piper would rake me over the coals for, but I can’t stop the word that pulses through my veins. Mine.
Only Piper and Ellie aren’t mine. Not to protect or keep or anything.
“Focus,” Tyler murmurs as he studies me. “You still here?”
“Yeah. Let’s keep going,” I say and grab the weights again.
“How much longer, Felix?” Tyler asks as I grunt through another set.
“At least thirty more minutes.”
“I mean, how much longer are you staying in the game?” He inclines his head. “You don’t have to put yourself through any of this.”
“You know I’ve got something to prove this season.”
“What more could you possibly need to prove? You’ve got Super Bowl rings, money, a clear path to Canton and the Hall of Fame.”
“I need to show everyone I can do it without Russ.” Most importantly, I need to show myself.
“The magic between you and Farmington was mutual.” Tyler shakes his head. “He and Ronnie did you dirty, but that’s on them. It has nothing to do with you or your ability to—”
“To what?” The weights I’m holding hit the floor with a bone-jarring clang. “Keep my girlfriend happy so she doesn’t crawl into bed with my friend?”
“To catch a ball and make plays and be the fucking hero on the field you seem to think you have to be. You’re more than the game, Felix, and there’s life after it. Look at your brother. Ian’s doing great.”
“Ian had a reason to leave.” My brother chose to retire in order to take a more active role in parenting his now thirteen-year-old daughter. “Riva needed him.”
“You’ve got reasons, too.”
“Name one.”
“Ellie.” Tyler says her name softly, but it’s like being smacked upside the head with a two-by-four.
“Fuck you,” I whisper, “for bringing her into this. You know it’s not permanent. I’m going to find her a real family.”
“Troy made you her godfather for a reason.” His dark eyes hold steady on me.
“Yeah, because I’m rich and generous. A fun honorary uncle.”
“That wasn’t—”
“Neither of them could have possibly considered an accident that would take them both. Nobody leaves their kid to the funcle.”
“Troy and Julie chose you.”
“They didn’t think it through.” I scrub a hand over my jaw. “No parent believes they’re going to leave their toddler an orphan. Troy probably figured I was the backup plan they’d never have to utilize.”
He throws me a towel. “Good parents prepare for worst-case scenarios. And they still picked you, Felix.”
“Can we stop fucking talking about Ellie?” I mutter.
It’s the same argument Piper made, and I don’t appreciate it any more now.
“I pay you to train me, not to psychoanalyze my life choices.” Never mind we’ve been together since I got drafted.
He’s been with me through the highs and lows of my career and my personal life, always grounding me in addition to kicking my ass.
Tyler moves forward to spot me as I position myself on the bench.
“I throw in the psychobabble free of charge.”
“Save it for somebody who gives a shit.”
He grins and adds extra weight to each side of the bar. But he could load it up with every plate in this gym at this point. I’ve got enough—let’s call it energy versus emotion—pulsing through me to bench-press an elephant right now.
“Easy there, old-timer,” he says as I heft the bar with more force than is necessary or smart.
“Screw you,” I answer.
“Right. So since you’re not interested in Piper beyond her nanny skills, you wouldn’t mind if I ask her out?”
The bar nearly slips from my grip as I bite back a growl. “Why the fuck would you want to do that?”
“Why not? She’s beautiful, fun, and gives you shit like a pro. That’s a winning trifecta in my book.”
The incessant drumbeat pounds through me again. Mine.
But I know what he’s doing. This is some reverse psychology bullshit.
“Go for it. You two would be fucking adorbs. Shout me out as your matchmaker when you go Instagram official.” Given his success with the ladies, I could too easily see it happening.
Tyler’s grin widens. “Will do.”
I know he’s bluffing. Tyler has a type: dark-haired and girl-next-door sweet. And while Piper might be the literal girl next door to my bedroom at the moment, anybody who makes the mistake of calling her sweet would end up gargling their nuts.
“What nights does she have off?”
“She works every day that ends in a Y.” The words escape before I can stop them.
“That’s what I figured.” His smile widens.
“Shut up and spot me.”
Ty and I are friends, but I also respect the hell out of his training methods and pay him good money to whip my ass. And the old-timer comment might have been a joke, but I’m not as young as I used to be. I give him a lot of credit for keeping me competitive in the league this long.
I give him more credit than my former quarterback and backstabbing friend, that’s for damn sure.
We go hard for another forty-five minutes, then I hit the sauna Ian installed next to the weight room. By the time I head upstairs, I’ve sweated out most of my pent-up frustration. Or so I thought.
I have a reputation around the league as a man who loves women.
And I do. All shapes and sizes. And grandma nanny notwithstanding, I rarely discriminate on age either.
But since having my heart trampled for a barely believable third time last summer, I’ve put a moratorium on dating.
And more specifically, on fucking. A ban I’ve only ignored once.
With Piper.
Voices drift from the family room, and I’m annoyed to realize one of them belongs to Tyler, who should be long gone by now. My jaw clenches. Unless he was serious about wanting to date her.
Damn it, I don’t care. Ty and Piper can date and do whatever else to their hearts’ content.
And no, I’m not gritting my teeth so hard it feels like I’m going to crack a molar when I find the two of them cozied up in the family room.
Tyler stands behind the couch while Piper sits on the floor with Ellie, who’s gnawing on a block instead of stacking it.
They look comfortable together. Too comfortable.
“Fee!” Ellie shouts, spotting me. Her face lights up as she waves the soggy block and lifts her hands into the air.
Yeah, the kid is damn cute.
I try to ignore the sharp pinch in my heart at the thought of that attorney calling and telling me he found a family member willing to adopt her.
“Fee up,” Ellie demands.
I lean down to kiss the top of her head. “I need to shower first, Bean. Uncle Felix is a stinky mess.”
“Fee up! Fee up!” She reaches for me, not seeming to care that I stink.
Tyler chuckles. “You always did have a way with the ladies.”
“Not all ladies,” Piper mutters, but there’s warmth in her eyes when she glances at me. She likes that Ellie likes me. I can see it in the soft way she watches us together.
“Tyler was just telling me about the children’s art center and a couple of good playgrounds around Vail,” Piper says, standing and brushing off her jeans. “Ellie might enjoy some toddler-friendly outings.”
“My sisters have scouted all the kid-friendly activities in the valley,” Ty confirms.
Of course. They’re talking about kid stuff, not planning a date. The relief that floods through me is embarrassing.
“I should probably head out.” Tyler glances at me, then checks his phone. “Same time tomorrow?”
“Yeah.” I watch as Piper scoops up Ellie, settling her on one hip with practiced ease.
“We’ll walk you out,” she tells Tyler. “This one loves to watch the hummingbirds go at it in the feeders out front. Don’t you, sweet girl?”
Ellie claps her hands. “Hummies!”
“Come on then.” Piper leads my trainer toward the door without looking back at me. Like I’m not even part of the equation. “Thanks for the kid tips, Tyler.”
“You bet. Maybe we can grab coffee sometime? I can tell you about all of Felix’s most embarrassing moments.”
Piper laughs, the sound hitting me in the chest. “I’d love that. The cringier the better.”
They’re at the door now, Piper shifting Ellie in her arms while Tyler opens it for her. She moves out of sight, and he turns back to me with a wink and a thumbs-up.
My hands curl into fists as the door closes behind them with a soft click.
I move to the window like an idiot, sweating my ass off as I watch my trainer and Piper walk down the front steps side by side. Tyler says something that makes her tip her head back and laugh, while Ellie points excitedly toward the hummingbird feeders hanging from the porch’s rafters.
They look natural together, like a little family unit.
The thought makes my chest burn with something that definitely isn’t jealousy. Because I don’t get jealous over women who aren’t mine. Particularly women who can barely tolerate me on a good day.
Except, Piper didn’t seem to barely tolerate me that night in Denver. And the way she melted into me yesterday when I carried her halfway down the mountain felt like anything but tolerance.
“Fuck,” I mutter, heading for the stairs.
Tyler’s either being friendly or trying to get under my skin. He isn’t going to try to date her. She’s off limits. He has to know that. Even if I haven’t explicitly said so and have no claim on her whatsoever.
Even if watching them together makes me want to punch something.
I strip off my clothes and crank the shower to cold, stepping under the icy spray with a hiss.
It’s none of my business. Piper can date whoever she wants.
Tyler can flirt with whoever he wants. I’m just the guy who happens to be sharing a house with her for the next month while she helps with Ellie.
I just have to survive one month without doing something stupid. Like telling Piper Hart I haven’t stopped thinking about her since April. Or admitting that having her here feels right in a way nothing has in a long time.
Or clocking my best friend for making her laugh.
The cold water beats down on me, doing absolutely nothing to ease the heat still flaring through my veins. Because all I can think about is the sound of her laughter floating back through the door, and how badly I want to be the one making her smile like that.
I’m so completely fucked.