27. Neve
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
Neve
I can’t stop thinking about him.
No matter what I do.
No matter where I go or how much I try to distract myself. I can’t get Celso out of my mind or my heart.
I’m falling apart without him. And I’m terrified of being with him.
In the last few days he hasn’t messaged me and I’m worried.
What if he’s given up? He said he never would though. What if he has?
The thought shatters me. It makes me realize that I never wanted him to give up because I always knew that at some point I would give in and go back to him.
I belong with him.
I need time to process everything.
I could be wrong though. After what I found out about him.
It could be my heart tricking my mind. Matters of logic falling away while blind love leads me. Dammit.
I need to talk to Dalila. She will know what to do. She always does.
Grabbing my phone off my bedside table I lie on my back, holding it above my head while I type the message to Dalila.
Me: I need to talk. I need to get out. I need my friend.
Dalila: Finally. I’m glad you’re done saying no to my invites. I’ll come fetch you at eight. Dinner first and then we’re going dancing.
Me: I’m not in the mood for a club. Dinner sounds perfect.
Dalila: I don’t care. Wear something hot. We are going dancing.
I grin and shake my head.
Me: Fine. I’ll be ready at eight.
Dalila arrives at Seven thirty. Nevio drops her off. We are going to catch an Uber there so that we don’t have to worry about having a few drinks.
She waltzes into my room like it’s her own. “ You aren’t even close to ready.” She shakes her head, looking me up and down where I’m standing in a towel, fresh out of the shower .
“I almost cancelled three times already.” I sigh, throwing my hands in the air in frustration.
“Idiot.” She mutters, walking over to the closet, tugging it open and searching through my dresses. “Oh, wow, this is new.” She says holding up a deep blue sequin dress.
“Celso got it for me.” I sigh. “It was one gift he had sent over here.”
“Well, if there is one thing I can say about my brother it’s that he has good taste.” She tosses the dress onto the bed and searches through my shoes, selecting gold stilettos.
“Um. No.” I shake my head at the shoes. She rolls her eyes.
“These?” She holds up a pair of red bottom black strappy stilettos. I nod.
“Ok. Well, hurry.” She waves her hand over the clothes and heads into my bathroom to find a hairbrush.
I slip into the dress and Dalila comes out and grabs my shoulders, turning my back to her and starting to tug my hair up into a messy, wild, loose bun high on my head .
I don’t know what all the worry was about.
We walk out of my room at eight on the dot.
Sitting at the restaurant I relax. I really didn’t want to come out. I changed my mind so many times and grappled between forcing myself to go and cancelling and climbing into bed. Never mind being late - if Dalila hadn’t rocked up when she did I would have messaged her and said no.
“Girl, you need to talk to me. You’ve been way too quiet for way too long and it’s not good for you.” Dalila says, pouring me a glass of white wine. She’s already ordered salmon for us with vegetables and baby roast potatoes on the side.
“I’m so lost.” I shrug. “Most of the time I don’t even understand what’s going on in my head so how can I explain it to someone else.” I chew at the inside of my cheek, uncomfortable and not wanting to cry in public.
Dalila tilts her head to the side. “Ok, so you found out some crazy stuff he did in the past right? And you left.”
I nod.
“And now - are you happy you left but angry with him? Are you scared he’s going to do something to you - because if he hurts you I swear I will?—”
“No. No it’s not like that.” I mutter.
Dalila picks up her wine and sips it while she watches me thoughtfully.
“Neve, the thing is that with whatever happened - we can all have our own opinions, but you are the only one who knows what happened between you two - and you are the only one who knows what you want at the end of the day.”
“What do you mean?” I ask, knotting my brows.
“I mean - you should follow your heart. Trust your heart. And no matter what I say or what your brother says - or even what my brother says - you should do what makes you happy.”
“I thought you didn’t want me anywhere near Celso.”
She grins.
“So, you do want to be with him still?” she says, drawing attention to my obvious statement. A confession I hadn’t realized I’d made .
My mouth drops open. “Um, I didn’t say that exactly?—”
“If you fell in love with that idiot - well that’s your own stupidity.” Dalila giggles. “Ok, no, but in all seriousness, Neve. I want you to be happy. With Celso or without Celso. I want you to be happy.”
Her saying that is a massive weight being lifted off my shoulders.
I have her blessing either way. I can walk away and hurt her brother, or I can go back to him - and she will still accept me as her friend.
“Ok, let’s not talk about this anymore. I want to have some fun tonight and relax.”
“Yes. Clear your head. Eat good food. Dance and forget about boys for tonight.” Dalila lifts her wine glass and holds it towards me.
The club is packed. It’s so loud I can’t hear Dalila when she asks me what I want to drink. She wave her hand in the air to say never mind and orders us some shots. After three shots I am relaxed and buzzing. The music is freaking incredible, the heavy base is massaging my brain into silence and I’m smiling for the first time in what seems like forever.
I dance, and I keep dancing until my feet ache. Dalila leads us to the bar to get more drinks.
That’s when I see him.
He’s standing by the bar with his eyes on me.
My heart leaps into my throat and my stomach is swarming with butterflies, all taking off at once.
I can’t look away and our eyes lock in the longest time. He smiles, the slightest curve of his lips, almost unperceivable.
Instead of rushing over to greet him, I take my shot, play it cool and head back to the dance floor.
But I can’t stop looking in his direction and the more I watch him the more I want to talk to him. But he’ll come and talk to me, surely. He’ll come say hi or dance with me. He always does.
Dalila noticed him because she followed my gaze. All she did was roll her eyes.
She’s dancing next to me and is oblivious to the heavy tension in the air between Celso and me .
After the most recent round of shooters glitters my brain, I can’t hide my smile when I look towards him.
He licks his lips and every cell in my body flares.
Fuck he’s hot. Like crazy hot. Like wildly, inappropriately, can’t be real hot.
I flirt with him by dancing and teasing a little. I’m playing with fire but I’m having fun. And I need a little fun in my life right now.
For an hour Celso and I flirt silently across the club. He sips his drink, his eyes wandering over me, and I wait for him to come over and say something to me.
After a while I tire of waiting, annoyed that he isn’t chasing me like he does. He hasn’t been messaging me the last few days. He hasn’t been sending gifts, and now he’s at the club and basically ignoring me.
What is going on with him?
What is he even doing here? Is he here by accident and I happened to be here ?
I chew the inside of my cheek, impatient, frustrated with him for keeping his distance.
I turn my back on him to hide my expression. My brows knotted while I try to decide if I’m going to march over there and give him a piece of my mind or not.
When I turn back - he’s gone.
I wait for him to come back.
But he’s gone.
He freaking left the club.
He didn’t say hello, and he didn’t say goodbye and when I realize that my heart shatters.
Also - anger floods me like a wild rain storm.
Dalila leans close to me, shouting right into my ear. “One last drink - Nevio is on his way to fetch us.”
“I’m going to catch a taxi, actually.”
“Why? That’s stupid. We can drop you at home.”
“I’m not going home.” I shout back, trying to be heard over the bass. I’m angry, fired up and ready to confront him for walking away without saying a word to me.
She grins and rolls her eyes. “Ok, I get it.” She laughs. “Well, wait here with me until Nevio gets here and we can drop you at Celso’s place.”
I smirk, she knows me too well. I guess that is what friends are for. She didn’t even judge me for trying to sneak off without telling her. “Thanks.” I grin and she orders us one more drink while we wait for Nevio to arrive.
I stand on the sidewalk outside Celso’s building. “Thank you, drive safe.” I shout back into the car. I swing it closed. The door slams a little harder than I expect it to, and I jump in fright. I need to calm down. Sheesh. Dalila grins and shouts goodbye through the open window and Nevio waves.
My stomach knots tightly as I walk towards the entrance of Celso’s building.
I’m still angry.
I can’t believe he left.
Digging around in my purse I find my house keys, which luckily have his house keys attached to them.
I’m tipsy. Perhaps more than tipsy. My head spins while the elevator takes me up to the top floor.
“Asshole.” I mutter to no one. “How can you watch me for an hour and leave?” my anger rises, pushing away the anxiety and nerves. I’m definitely going to give him a piece of my mind when I get up there. He’s going to hear exactly what I think about him and his stupid games. And who the hell does he think he is not messaging me or calling for the past few days?
It’s not acceptable.
The elevator doors slide open and I have to hold on to the wall for a moment to steady myself. Wow. I should not have had that last drink, but I’m also giggling because I’m still having more fun than I’ve had in ages. Well, since I left Celso. It’s nice not to be drowning in my misery and to instead be a little tipsy and on my way to give someone a mouthful of drama.
I fumble with the key and fumble again and swear loudly .
The door opens and Celso is standing there in a pair of dark jeans - and nothing else.
I stare up at him and narrow my eyes. My body ignites as my eyes trace over his perfection. Fuck. What was I going to say?
“Angel. What are you doing here?” he says, his deep voice a smooth current washing away my anger.
“I - I came to - you should never have.”
He grabs me and drags me into the apartment. In a flash his lips are on mine and his body is pressed against me. I drop the keys, my bag, my phone and melt against him.
A flash of anger spikes inside me and I shove him away.
“No, wait, you don’t get to kiss me and make me forget what I came here to say—” I stammer, trying to pull myself together.
“Actually, sweet girl, I get to do whatever the fuck I want. And that dress looks amazing on you by the way.” He growls, coming at me again and lifting me off my feet, slamming me against the wall and wrapping one of my legs over his arm as he presses his cock between my legs.