25. Masaccio
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Masaccio
S he is still tied to the bed. I lie next to her catching my breath. Her skin is shining with a thin layer of perspiration, and she has the most gorgeous grin on her face.
I roll towards her, reaching for the cord and pulling it loose.
She lowers her arms and rotates her wrists, rubbing them a little.
“Was it too tight?” I ask, concerned that I hurt her.
“Not at all.” She says with a slight blush on her cheeks.
I grab her around the waist and pull her up against my body. It feels so good to just be here with her, to feel her skin against mine. Tonight, out at the beach bar - it was so much fun.
I want to tell her how I feel - that I’m sorry for the stupid way I acted. I want to explain to her I’ve never felt this way before and I’m not very good with words. But, I just stare at her instead, appreciating the soft curve of her cheek bones and the sharp dip of her collar bone.
I trace my fingers over it, following the shape of her body.
Her stomach growls loudly and she giggles.
“Are you hungry?” I ask, sitting up. “I can order some room service.” I climb off the bed ready to find the hotel phone.
“Actually. I have a nice selection of leftovers in the fridge. I’m happy to snack on that.”
“Alright. I can do with leftovers.” I head towards the little kitchen and unpack three boxes from the fridge.
Roast chicken pieces, a stir-fry and some sushi. An interesting mix of assorted flavors.
Putting them all onto a plate, arranging them nicely, I carry it back towards the bed and sit down next to her.
She’s pulled her floral dress back on, much to my disappointment.
“I don’t know why you put this back on when I am just going to take it off again later.” I grin, reaching out to touch her dress.
She leans up against the back of the bed, crossing her legs and pulling the plate of food towards herself.
She looks so relaxed. Content and happy. I wish I could see her like this all the time.
I can.
If I just open up to her and be honest about everything.
When we are done eating, I’ll tell her.
Watching her I know it’s real. I know without a doubt that I have fallen for her.
It seems like the universe was on my side this entire time - I just wasn’t paying attention.
But it also seems that it’s not too late.
I still have a chance. She is still willing to let me close to her.
She is chatting, telling me about her diving lessons and how she swam with sharks.
It’s so good to hear her talking like this again.
I get nervous as the food finishes.
How am I going to word this? What am I going to say?
My jaw is clenching and unclenching, and I feel tension creeping into my shoulders.
Leora notices it too.
She stops talking and looks towards me.
“Is something wrong? Was I talking too much? Was I - was I annoying you?” She asks, sounding hurt.
“No - definitely not. Not at all - it’s - I need to talk to you—”
“Ok.” She sits up straighter, biting her lower lip.
“Leora, I know why you left. Uh - let me start from the beginning.” I swallow hard. The beginning. Where is that? The kiss?
“Ever since this whole thing started - it happened really quickly. You have to understand that I have never seen myself as the type of guy who was going to get married. And then it was thrown at me. And then you stopped talking to me. And you just left. You didn’t say a word. You snuck off in the middle of the night. Taking your bags. I saw you on the security cameras and I thought - she didn’t even have the heart to tell me to my face that she was leaving. I was angry and hurt—”
Leora pushes herself off the bed and turns to glare at me. “Are you serious right now? You want to lecture me for leaving? You came all this way to get laid and then tell me I hurt your feelings by leaving? This has to be some kind of fucked up joke?” She yells at me.
Shit.
None of my words came out right. I wanted to tell her it hurt me when she left because I realized I have fallen for her. What did I say? Whatever I said has made her furious.
“Wait. Just listen to me.” I say, standing up.
She grabs her cardigan and slides her arms into it.
“Actually, I don’t have to listen to you for another second. I am so over you and the way you treat me. I don’t deserve this. You are the biggest asshole I have ever met. I wish I had never met you. I can’t believe I am stuck - married to you—” her words are clipped, angry, heated. She spits them at me with hurt in her voice. Her chest is heaving up and down as she huffs.
“Leora.” I try again, but she pushes past me, towards the door, walking out of it and slamming it behind herself.
Fuck. That was terrible.
Why am I so fucking bad at this?
“Shit.” I swear loudly. “I need to fix this - again.” Searching around the room I find my shirt, pulling it on and rushing to do up the buttons.
I need to go find her.
It’s a toss-up between giving her the space to calm down - or finding her and explaining that I didn’t mean for it to sound like it did.
I push the door of the villa open and step out onto the sand.
Really there is no toss up at all. I have to find her and fix this.
It’s dark, but the pathway on either side of the villa is lit with fairy lights - and above me the moon is bright, and the stars are glittering everywhere. It’s a beautiful night. The kind of night where you hold someone special and tell them you love them.
I glance left, then right, trying to figure out which way she would have gone.
In the distance the party is still going at the beach bar. I can hear the music and laughter.
She would have wanted to be alone I imagine.
So, I turn in the opposite direction and walk along the beach - looking for her.