34. Nova
34
nova
He left me, and for the first time in the last eighteen hours, I felt something other than heartbreak. I was pissed. How dare he fucking leave me like a helpless woman when the people I loved were missing and I was an able-bodied person ready to help and search. So, I got dressed in the warmest things I owned, laced up my boots ready to go out when Genevieve and Camila walked out of the hallway dressed similarly to me.
“The town Facebook group says they are convening at the fire station again to help look for them,” Genevieve said, as she read off her phone.
“We can probably make it before they start leaving,” Camila said, grabbing a bag and a few thermos’ I missed. “Here’s some coffee to keep us warm and keep us awake.”
I was in awe of these women and to thank them was right on the tip of my tongue, but I was afraid if I did then I would start crying and the fire I woke up with would burn out. I needed that fire to get me through the day.
The girls and I got into what I assumed was Luke's truck and it was a little comical how much Camila had to scoot the seat up to be able to reach the pedals. We drove in silence with Genevieve looking back at me every so often like she was afraid I would break down or jump out of a moving car.
We made it to the fire station without me doing either and the amount of people here blew my mind. One of the search and rescue guys was talking about where we would start looking as we walked through the crowd. A few people patted my back, and I stopped when I saw the families of the kids that were missing. Some of the moms hugged me and that’s when I learned a few kids and dads had made their way back.
The avalanche had hit them, panic ensued, they all got separated.
Since it snowed last night, their chances of survival were slim. One of the moms held my hand as I tried to wrap my brain around what was happening. Camila and Genevieve had their hands on my shoulder when commotion erupted.
“Medic!”
My head whipped towards the sound as firemen and a few other people rushed toward the ambulance. I was pushed aside as a few moms tried to rush over, but a few police officers held us back.
“Hello?” Genevieve answered her phone. “What? Ok, yes. Well, I’ll ask her.”
“They found them,” she whispered, and I cried in relief.
Camila grabbed my hand and maneuvered us out of the crowd following Genevieve.
“They are heading to Monroe’s hospital,” Genevieve said, as we climbed into the truck and Camila drove like a mad woman.
If I wasn’t fearful for my life, I think I would have cried the entire way there. Camila left us at the entrance to the ER as she went to find a parking spot. As soon as we walked in Colt, Luke, Jude and Forest were talking to what looked like a mountain man.
“Colt,” I called out and he turned quickly.
“Cielo,” he said, as he caught me in his arms.
“Are they ok?” I whimpered.
“They’re fine,” he breathed. “They were dehydrated and hungry, Atlas was the only one hurt with a broken leg. Theo and Sol are getting checked out as a precautionary measure and given fluids.”
“Oh, my god,” I cried. “I need to see them.”
“I bet you can see Sol,” he said, pulling away.
I quickly hugged Jude and Luke.
“This is Aiden, he helped Search and Rescue since he knows these mountains well, he is the one who found them,” Colt said, and before I could think clearly, I hugged him too.
“Thank you so much,” I cried.
“I’m glad we were able to find them,” he said, patting my back.
“We owe you so much,” I said, still hugging him when I felt Colt behind me.
“Ok, too much, thanks,” Colt said, tugging me back.
“Not enough,” I grumbled, “And look, he’s married,” I said, spotting his ring.
Aiden chuckled. “My wife works here as a nurse.”
“Well, thank you so much,” I said.
I rushed to the front desk where I was let through right away. A nurse showed me to a small room, and she pulled the curtain back. Sol was covered in dirt, talking animatedly to Iris who was holding her hand.
“Sweetheart,” I whispered.
“Momma!” Sol cried out, as I rushed to her.
I wanted to crush her to me, but I was afraid she was hurt.
“Baby girl,” I cried, holding her against me.
Thinking I might lose her was the worst pain imaginable. No parent should have to go through that pain.
“Are you ok? How are you feeling?” I asked, noticing she was hooked up to an IV.
“They said she's doing great, a little dehydrated, but overall, they say she looks great,” Iris said.
“Thank you for staying with her,” I said, hugging Iris. “I’m a little upset that you left without me, but thank you for going out to find them.”
“She’s like my little niece.” Iris hugged her.
“I’ve always wanted tios and tias,” Sol said, hugging her back.
“Aunts and uncles.” I translated for Iris.
She smiled, kissing Sol’s head. I turned away to keep my hazy eyes hidden, I always wanted her to have a family too.
“How are Theo and Atlas?” I asked, peeking around the curtain to see if I saw either of them.
“Theo is across the hall,” Iris said.
I wanted to head over there immediately, but leaving Sol felt wrong.
“Mama, go see how they are doing,” she said, laying back on the bed.
“It’s ok, I’m?—”
“Go. Tell me they are ok,” she murmured.
“I got her,” Iris whispered.
“Ok, I’ll be right back,” I said, walking across the hallway quickly, feeling like I was going to get in trouble.
The nurses were a little distracted and, thankfully, nobody paid attention to me.
“Theo,” I whispered, not wanting to look around the curtain in case it wasn’t his room.
“Nova?”
As soon as I heard his voice, I slipped through the curtain seeing him standing like he was pacing the room. I looked him up and down, but he looked good, just dirty and tired.
“Darlin’,” he said and I almost cried again.
He pulled me against him, and I was helpless in keeping my tears at bay.
“I thought we had lost you,” I cried. “I thought…”
“We are fine,” he said, taking a deep breath. “We got very lucky.”
“Thank you for keeping Sol safe.” I held on tighter.
“Atlas saved her,” he mumbled against my hair. “I froze and he pushed us into gear. He tried to help the others, but they just scattered. He pushed me forward while he tried to help one of the dads and that’s the last I saw of him. Sol and I got buried, but it was only maybe two feet. I was able to dig us out, but I was exhausted.”
Theo took another deep breath like he was getting ready to keep talking.
“You don’t have to do this now,” I said, leaning back to look at him. “You’re here, you're safe and?—”
“I got us out, but we were disoriented. Sol was crying and my only worry at the moment was getting Sol to calm down,” he shuddered as he started tapping his fingers. “It was getting dark by the time I found Atlas and I couldn’t leave him. I’m sorry I didn’t bring her back.”
“You did what you thought was best,” I said, wanting to kiss him.
“Is Atlas ok?” he asked.
“I don’t know, but I can go see if I can get some information,” I said, standing on my tippy toes to kiss him softly.
“Don’t leave yet, I… Don’t leave me yet,” he stuttered as he continued to tapped his fingers.
“Come on, let’s go sit down,” I said, guiding him to the bed to lay down.
He was wound tightly and something else seemed to be bothering him.
“Hey, are you in pain? Do you need something?” I rubbed his arm while he just sat there.
“I love you, Nova,” he said softly.
My heart stuttered. I opened my mouth, but he shook his head.
“I’ve loved you since that first time you gave me a haircut. You were patient with me when I didn’t know what I wanted and when I said I didn’t like clippers. You've… you’ve always treated me like everyone else, and you’ve always made me feel safe.” He cupped my face. “I’ve loved you since you turned down all of my offers to help you. Your stubbornness is admirable. I love you and the sunshine you have brought into our lives, not just with an amazing daughter, but with your strength, your smiles and your thoughtfulness. We are lucky to have you in our lives, and I should have said it before I left, but Nova, I am in love with you. I don’t think I stood a chance against your love because you've always felt like you belonged with us. You don’t have to say it back, I know it's scary and you will say it in your own time, but I had to let you know. It killed me that I could have left the world without ever telling you how I really felt.”
I was crying again as he hugged me. I knew I loved all of them.
“I think I’ve loved you from that first haircut or how you held Sol for me when she was three months old and I was stressed out because she was crying so much. You looked so good with her in your arms and when she stopped crying for you, I knew you were special.” Butterflies exploded as I got ready to confess something. “You were always off limits, but I always wondered what our life would be like if you were mine.” I laughed nervously. “I think it's so much better than I imagined. I love you, Theodore.”
Theo grinned, his eyes shining with tears as he pulled me forward. “I love you and I hope we can give you and Sol the life you deserve.”
“Well, no more hiking, that’s for sure,” I chuckled.
“Not for a while,” he said, kissing me softly, deepening it and then resting his forehead against mine. “Nothing will keep us apart.”
The curtain opened as a nurse walked into the room. I stepped away as she came to check on his IV.
“I’m going to go check on Sol and see if I hear anything about Atlas,” I said, blowing him a kiss.
His cheeks grew red as he smiled. I left the room, checking in on Sol who was passed out, getting checked on by a nurse. She was the same nurse who had helped me when I came in last summer.
“Oh, hey you,” she said, like she recognized me. “You came in last summer with a concussion.”
“Yup, that’s me, how does she look?” I asked.
“Great, just a little dehydrated, but once she finishes the IV, she’ll be good to go,” she said, flipping through an iPad.
“Do you happen to know what happened to the other man that was brought in with her?”
“Oh, the one across the hall?” She pointed behind her.
“No, the man with the broken leg,” Iris added.
“Oh Dr. Jensen! I think he is coming back from getting an X-ray,” she said, looking at his watch. “I can let you know when he comes back.”
“Would you please? He’s my boyfriend and I’ll be forever grateful,” I said, as I heard the sound of a curtain being pulled aside. Theo was walking out of his room with his IV cart, heading straight towards me.
“Sir, you can’t just leave your room,” his nurse said, walking to us.
“Can he stay with us?” I asked immediately. “He’s my boyfriend and he doesn’t do well in hospitals.”
“How many boyfriends you got, girl?” Jane asked.
“Uh… three,” I said blushing.
The other nurse scoffed at me. “Seriously, leave some men for the rest of us girls. Six men between the two of you and I can’t even manage to tolerate one for more than an hour.”
“Wait, you have three boyfriends too?” I asked, getting excited at finding someone who was in a relationship like me.
“Three husbands,” she grinned. “My husband helped your guy find Sol.”
“Aiden.”
“Yup! Callum was helping another team and Nathan is at home with our baby,” she said, full of pride.
“That's awesome,” I said, wanting to become her best friend, but trying not to be too weird.
“We should go out to dinner and vent about our men,” Jane chuckled.
“I’m down,” I said immediately, flinching from being too quick to say yes.
“We can exchange numbers before you leave,” she said, looking down the hall. “It looks like your other man is back.”
“Thank you so much!” I yelled, walking to his room.
The nurses were helping him into his bed as I stood off to the side. They spoke to him in soft tones as he nodded, his eyes already drooping. As soon as they left, I rushed to his side.
“Atlas,” I teared up again.
“Hey, Starlight,” he murmured. “I missed you.”
“I missed you too; you scared the crap out of us,” I said, holding onto his hand.
“Sol and Theo are ok?” he asked.
“Great, just dehydrated,” I said, pushing his hair out of his face. “They are alive because of you.”
“Fuck, I was so scared, Nova,” he whispered. “All I could think about was getting Sol home to you no matter what, even if it meant I wasn’t coming home.”
“Thank you, but I needed you too, Atlas,” I said, kissing his forehead. “I love you.”
“Shit, Nova. Say it again, but this time say my name.” He pulled me closer.
“I love you, Atlas,” I murmured. “I almost didn’t stay in Sterling Ridge, but your act of kindness made me stay. Every time you left, it felt like you left us too and when you came back it was a relief, even if you weren’t mine at the time. Thank you for giving us somewhere we belong.”
“No, I should thank you. You gave us something I didn’t think any of us knew we needed,” he sighed. “I just hope it's not too?—”
The curtain to the room opened, startling both of us, and in walked Theo and Colt with Jane right behind them. She winked at me as she let them in. I mouthed a ‘thank you’ as she pulled the curtains closed and Theo rushed to Atlas.
“Are you ok? How do you feel? What did they say? I’m sorry I’m an asshole.” Theo spoke rapidly and Atlas chuckled.
“You’re not an asshole,” Atlas said. “It was stupid of?—”
“No, it’s not stupid, you’ve talked about this for years and I?—”
“Change is hard, I know, and the last thing I wanted to do was change this…us,” Atlas said, cupping Theo’s face.
“Jude was talking about moving to Denver and when I saw your letter, I panicked,” Theo whispered. “Losing Jude was going to be hard, but losing you both just made old feelings return and I let them get the best of me. I’m—I’m sorry.”
“It’s ok, Teddy,” Atlas said. “I love you and it’s going to take a lot more than us arguing to push me away.”
“I don’t want to be apart, so if this will make you happy, maybe I can find someone to run the ranch for me or sell?—”
“Don’t you dare sell it,” Atlas snapped. “I’m not going to San Francisco.”
“We could all go, and I’m sure Nova could find a job and Colt could work at a shop,” Theo said, looking over at us like he was pleading for us to say something.
“I don’t know if I would like a big city anymore,” I said, running my hands through Atlas’ hair.
“I like my coworkers; they might be smelly and hard to move, but at least they don’t talk back to me,” Colt said behind me. “I say I miss it, but I’d probably hate it now.”
“But things would be so much better for you,” Theo said confused. “A small town is no place for you guys.”
“I think it is because you are here, so is Colt and Atlas,” I said, reaching over for his hand. “We are exactly where we belong.”