33. Colt
33
colt
The Malones were some of the best people I knew. After we had showered, they had food waiting for us, and basically took over dishing out orders and making Nova as comfortable as possible.
Right now, the girls surrounded her as some movie played, but Nova just stared off into the distance. Genevieve let Nova lay her head on her lap as she played with her hair. Camila had Nova’s feet in her lap and Iris sat in front of them, giving Nova pieces of popcorn every so often.
I didn’t know if I would ever be able to thank them for what they were doing for her, and it made me want to start crying all over again. It seemed I had more tears to shed since Nova and I had cried together, but seeing her in so much pain, wrecked me.
“What’s the plan?” Luke asked, also looking at the girls.
“I want to go out and search first thing in the morning,” I said, putting the kettle on the stove. “I would have gone out, but I didn’t want to leave Nova alone and there's no sense in looking in this storm if it means I get lost too.”
“As much as I want to leave this in the hands of Search and Rescue because they are professionals, I can’t just do nothing,” Luke said, mixing a bowl of cookie dough. “I don’t like thinking of them alone out there, but knowing Theo, he went out there prepared.”
“Nova said he had a big pack with him,” I said, grabbing a piece of the dough and eating it. “Maybe, we could take Iris. I think she would be able to help us and the more people we have, the better.”
“You think Jude will help?” Luke asked, scooping out the dough and putting it on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper.
“Yeah, in a heartbeat, but they didn’t let him go looking earlier, and I know he was itching to leave.” I reached for more dough, but he slapped my hands away.
I scowled like I was upset, but honestly, Luke could punch with half power and still knock me out.
“Wait till they are done,” he said, as someone knocked on the door.
“It’s Jude,” Iris called out.
I opened the door to see Jude with red-rimmed eyes, and I just about started crying again. I stepped aside so he could come in. The weather looked worse, making me worry even more. Jude took off his jacket, said hello to the ladies and kissed Nova on the forehead then whispered something to her. She nodded, her lip trembling and she said thank you. I clenched my jaw from the rising emotions.
“Hungry?” I asked, as he came over to us.
He shook his head while hugging Luke and a small sob escaped him. Luke held him tightly as I rubbed his back and while we all love Theo, Jude and him were practically attached at the hip for years. Even though Jude was younger, he was Theo’s protector for so many years since people picked on him for being different.
“I should have gone,” Jude mumbled as he pulled away. “I was supposed to go until…”
“Until what?” I asked.
“You know Webber got hurt right?”
Luke and I nodded.
“I have been going out of town to help him any time I can, and I made a comment that maybe I should just move out there to help him out,” Jude sighed, running his hand through his hair. “He freaked out and when I pushed the issue, it turned into a fight.”
That’s probably what triggered Theo and why he was so upset with Atlas.
“You going might not have made any difference,” I said, patting his back.
“And if you had gone you might just be out there with them. Then we’d be worrying about two brothers?” Luke snapped. “There was nothing you or anyone could have done differently other than having them not go.”
“He’s right, Jude,” I said, “It’s not your fault.”
“I fucking hate this,” he growled. “They should all be home here with us. I can’t even imagine what Nova is going through.”
“It’s fucking awful, and I feel so powerless,” I said, running my hand through my hair.
Luke put the cookies in the oven. “That’s why tomorrow we want to go looking for them.”
“Let's do it. I was able to take pictures of the maps they used and where they already searched for them.”
Jude pulled out his phone showing us where he thought they might be. We devised a plan as the cookies baked and by the time I offered Nova a cookie, I felt like I was one step closer to delivering my promise.
After we had our cookies, I dragged Nova back to our room so she and I could rest even though sleep was far from my mind. I was anxious to get out to look for them, so I just held Nova as my mind raced.
“Why do you call Sol, Sundae?” Nova murmured, startling me a little bit.
“I thought you were asleep,” I said, kissing her forehead.
“I don’t know if I’m going to be able to sleep,” she said, tracing her finger up and down my abs. “So, why do you call her Sundae?”
“You know I didn’t grow up with much and we struggled a lot, but every so often my mom would take me out for a sundae. Those days were one of the highlights of my childhood. I didn’t have a lot of toys and my mom was so wrapped up in keeping us afloat that when she bought me a sundae, it instantly made everything better. So, I call her Sundae because Sol is all the bright moments in my life along with you.”
Nova sniffled. “That’s beautiful, Colt. You know why I named her Sol? I lived up to my name right before I was pregnant with her. I was at the top of my career, I had a great boyfriend, and I was doing very well financially. I was at peak luminosity, but after I found I was pregnant it's like all of that was taken away and I lost my light. When she was born, I swear to god, she was born with a smile on her face. She brightened up my world. Right then and there, I swore I would make sure she shined bright not for everyone else, but for herself because she is the brightest star and I'm just caught in her orbit.”
“She is the brightest star, and I think we all are happy to be in her orbit,” I said, holding her tighter. “I love her just like I love her momma.”
Nova sat up quickly. It was dark and all I could see was her silhouette, but I felt her stare and shock. I sat up slowly.
“I know this might not be the best time to say it, but I really do love you girls. You are the best parts of my days, my weeks, my months and my life. I thought I knew what love was, but you girls showed me I was only using a part of my heart. I know this might seem soon, but the only thing I will regret is not saying it sooner because I want you to know I love both of you every single day.”
“Dammit, Colt. I swore I would never find love again. Who knew it would be with my neighbors and the man who drove me crazy and gave me a pack of dead batteries, but I fucking love you too.” She leaned forward, kissed me and I deepened the kiss pouring every ounce of love I had into her. “I never thought I could find someone who would love me and my daughter.”
“I can’t imagine not falling in love with you ladies, you have me wrapped around your fingers.” I sighed holding her close. “And there's no place I'd rather be.”
“Fuck, I can’t lose her, Colt,” she cried into my chest. “I can’t lose them.”
“We won’t.” It was dumb to be so positive, but I felt it in my gut that we would find them and we would sit our asses down to talk and start living our life together because a life without Sol, Theo, Atlas and Nova was an existence I didn’t want to be a part of.
My phone buzzed right next to me as I scrambled to shut it off quickly. Nova was pressed up against my back, spooning me and, while it was weird at first, I had grown to like being the little spoon. It was six in the morning as I checked the weather to see if the storm had died out.
I slid out of the bed, dressing as quickly and quietly as I could. Nova and I had barely fallen asleep three hours ago, she needed her rest, and I was hoping by the time she woke up, we had some answers.
I grabbed my hiking boots and left the room to see Luke doing the same. Jude and Iris were already in the kitchen pouring us coffee looking at the maps Jude had brought back.
A small knock on the door made my heart beat faster. I checked my phone wondering if I had missed anything and when I opened the door our Ranch Hand Forest stood there in hiking gear.
“I want to help,” he said, looking somber. “I did chores already.”
“Fuck Forest,” I said, pulling him in for a hug. “Thank you. Come on in, we have some coffee and we are looking at some maps.”
Forest followed me into the kitchen. I grabbed a cup, poured coffee, sugar and milk before I chugged most of it. We all looked exhausted, barely hanging on, and I was hit with a sense of immense love for these people.
“Thank you for helping and being here for us,” I said, my voice cracking at the end. “I was an only child, and I don’t think I’ve ever really understood family dynamics until now, so, I’m grateful Theo has you guys.”
A tear slid down my cheek as I took a deep breath.
“You’re our family too,” Jude said, hugging me and it turned into another group hug with Forest awkwardly standing to the side before Jude brought him into the hug.
“Ok, sorry, I didn’t mean to get sappy,” I said, wiping my face.
“At this point any excuse to cry is ok with me, it helps to not keep it all bottled up,” Iris said, then chugged her coffee.
“You ready to go find our brothers and our niece?” Luke said, as he slipped a beanie on. “Well, not your brothers, cause that would be weird.”
“I like the sound of that,” I chuckled, hoping that I still had time to make us a proper family.
We bundled up and the sun was rising just as we left the house. We took two trucks Luke and Iris headed out with me and Jude headed out with Forest to the spot we agreed on before we had to start hiking. I parked the truck by the trail and we all exited as someone's phone rang loudly.
Jude scrambled to get his phone out of his pants as he got out of Forest’s truck. “Hello.”
We all waited, and my heart was pounding so loudly it was all I could hear for a moment.
“Yeah, right now. I’m actually here with his family,” Jude said, a blush tainting his cheeks. “I know, but what did you expect?”
His tone made me worried as they spoke and he hung up abruptly.
“They found three kids alone last night,” he said and my stomach dropped. “Then they found two adults and two kids.”
“Sol, Theo or Atlas?” I whispered.
He shook his head. “They need help covering the south part of the trail because they are pretty sure they got hit by the avalanche.”
I couldn’t say anything, I grabbed my bag and handed everyone else theirs. If they got hit, that meant they were either dead or they didn’t have much time and I was really praying it was the latter. We didn’t speak after that as Jude navigated us through the trail until we spotted the start of the snow from the avalanche. I quickly turned around as I got light-headed, my chest felt tight and I couldn’t breathe.
“Colt,” Iris said, kneeling in front of me with tears in her eyes.
“I… I… We… can’t… lose them,” I said, between each gasp of breath.
“I know, we won’t, we will find them,” she growled. “Now take a deep breath with me and tell me three things you see.”
Iris calmed me down until I was able to breath on my own. Thankfully, Jude, Forest and Luke started looking and with renewed vigor, I started looking too. I couldn’t lose my family, not when I finally felt like we were finally complete.