Chapter 5
FIVE
The old engine coughs and sputters, protesting the long drive as we pull into the parking lot at Shannon’s. I’m panting, and my knuckles are white as I grip the steering wheel, willing the van to make it just a few more feet.
The drive here was rocky, to say the least, and it’s a wonder we didn’t break down in the middle of the road.
With a final, reluctant lurch, we roll to a stop, the engine letting out a pathetic wheeze before falling silent without me turning the key.
Dead.
Final destination.
My heart races as I glance over at Saylor, who’s perched in the passenger seat.
“We made it,” I breathe out, my voice tinged with relief and disbelief.
“Barely,” he replies, eyebrows reaching his hairline. “I think Van-essa just died. Is there something like van heaven? Is her ghost here with us?” he jokes, looking around himself as if waiting for her spirit to appear.
“Ha-ha. You’re so damn funny,” I mutter, clicking the seat belt open.
“I told her she was allowed to die if we got Lio to the hospital in time, and she held out even longer. But now she’s done, and it seems like she took the permission to heart.
” I stroke the interior in front of me. “Thank you for having my back, old friend. I promise I’ve got yours.
I’m going to fix you no matter what. Even if I have to stay here forever to do it.
” When I look back up at Saylor, he’s watching me with a frown and sad eyes.
“What? I love this shitty van, okay? Nobody gets left behind.”
He looks at me for a moment longer, frown deepening and silence stretching before he softly repeats my words, “Nobody gets left behind.”
It’s silent again for a few heartbeats. My gaze goes to the restaurant, and I’m nervous about what’s waiting for me.
Tally’s going to be furious.
I’m a shitty friend.
But it’s not like I have any practice at being one.
Saylor starts to fidget, his whole demeanor changing, and I glance at him. He smiles, making a come-here motion with his finger. Leaning in curious, I ask, “What?”
He leans in, too, so he can whisper in my ear. “If I can make you come with one finger, imagine what I can do with my whole hand.”
I laugh, a smile tugging at my lips while I shake my head, exasperation in my tone as I say, “Ugh, come on.”
He grins, leaning in to kiss my birthmark. “You got way too serious again. We’re here. We made it this far. It’s going to be okay, Boo. Everything will work out.”
He’s right. As long as he’s here, I’m going to be fine.
Let’s just hope he stays for a while.
We climb out of the van, my legs trembling from the ordeal of the sketchy drive and my nerves about being here. As I close the creaking door, the restaurant’s neon sign flickers to life over the deserted parking lot.
I turn to face Saylor, a grateful smile on my lips. “Thanks for sticking with me. I don’t want to face Tally alone. I turned off my phone after she called me over and over.”
“Sure, I’m here, but I didn’t have a chance against that firecracker while I was alive. No way I can do anything to help like this.” He gestures to himself, waving his hand through his stomach, making me laugh.
“You can be my emotional support spirit,” I tease, smiling at him.
“You’re reducing me to just a dog now, huh?” he teases back, grinning.
“Well, they are your favorites,” I reply with a nonchalant shrug, earning a chuckle from him.
“You little minx,” he accuses, stepping closer to me. His eyes take on a heated intensity as he smirks at me, his hand coming up to cup my cheek.
Just as he’s about to lean in, the door to the restaurant opens, and Tally comes rushing out, her hands clutched to her belly, tears streaming down her face. “Sloan!” she yells, her voice cracking. “Where the hell have you been?”
Behind her, Tim follows, his eyes wide with worry as he attempts to calm Tally. “Baby, please. Slow down.”
But Tally doesn’t listen. She reaches me in seconds, and Saylor steps back before her arms envelop me in a crushing hug. “Are you fucking kidding me? You didn’t answer any of my calls, your van was gone, you were gone! I thought you just left without a goodbye. What happened?”
She’s trembling in my arms as she clings to me, and guilt hits me like a ton of bricks as I hold her tightly, tears stinging my own eyes while I meet Tim’s stern gaze. “I’m so sorry,” I whisper, my voice choked with emotion. “I didn’t mean to worry you like this.”
I’m a horrible person.
But I’m not used to having people who care.
“Well, you fucking did, Tarzan. Come on, let’s get inside to talk about this. I want her to sit down after that little sprint.” Tim seems agitated, and I can’t even be mad about it.
I messed up.
Tally’s grip on me loosens, and she steps back, taking my hand in a vice grip.
She leans away just enough to look up into my eyes, her own filled with relief and lingering concern.
“Don’t you ever do that to me again, missy,” she warns, her voice trembling.
“I can’t handle this kind of stress, especially not now. ”
A new wave of guilt chokes me when Saylor laughs. “Way to knock her down, Tall.” I shoot him a glare, and he puts his hands up surrender. “Hey, she’s the one guilt-tripping, but if it works, it works.”
I focus back on Tally as we enter the restaurant, the doors closing behind us. “I won’t.”
Tim steps closer to Tally’s other side, placing a hand on her shoulder, his expression softening.
“We were just scared for you, Sloan,” he admits, his voice heavy with worry.
“We picked you up from those jerks, you make a mind-blowing reveal, and then you just disappear like…” he mimics an explosion with his hands, “… poof.”
“She wishes she was that cool.” Saylor chuckles from beside me.
I have to stifle a chuckle at that, but Tally still looks worried, so I keep a serious face. “I know, and I’m sorry. But some shit happened, and—”
“And next time shit happens, you call your best fucking friend, idiot.” Tally finally lets go of me, wiping away a tear with the back of her hand.
“Which would be me,” Saylor chimes in. “But I guess I need to learn to share you anyway.”
That little…
Tally takes a shaky breath and offers a weak smile. “Now that’s settled, let’s sit down so you can tell us what happened.”
Tim grabs Mac from the kitchen, who joins us at a table with a bottle of water for each of us. It’s Sunday, and I know the evening rush will start shortly, so I need to speed through everything. I hesitate, unsure how much I can say with Mac there, but Tally tells me matter-of-factly, “I told him.”
That admission knocks the breath out of me, and I can practically feel my heart skip a beat.
Tally shrugs at my shocked face, announcing, “What you can do is awesome and nothing to be ashamed of or something you need to hide. I understand you don’t want everyone to know, but our inner circle has to. We love you, all of you. There is no need to hide from the people who love you.”
Unmoving, shock still rushing through me, it takes a second to realize what she just did and said.
They all know.
And they’re still here.
“She’s right,” Saylor agrees from where he’s standing behind me, his hand landing on my shoulder.
I’m trying not to tear up at her words, the lump in my throat making it hard to swallow. My gaze finds Mac’s, prepared to see disbelief in his eyes, but he reaches over the table to notch my chin up slightly. “Told you everything will be fine,” he tells me in his gruff tone.
I nod, biting my lip. Taking a deep breath, I try to calm down before I tell them everything.
About how Jessica and Lio found me, how we rushed to the hospital, about Lio’s condition, how the guys got there, how I let Jessica talk through me to them, and how she found the light.
Tally is in tears when I tell her about what I promised Jessica to relay to them, that it’s not a goodbye but a see you later.
She breaks down on Tim, who also wipes tears away from his cheek.
Mac is his stoic self, leaning back in his chair, tattooed arms crossed over his massive chest, but I notice a flicker of something in his eyes too.
I continue to tell them how I left the guys standing there and stayed in my van the last few days. How I decided to come back because I needed a plan and money. I tell them about everything, but…
Saylor.
I could excuse it by telling myself that I don’t want her to get upset about it or that it’s not the right time or place. But let’s be honest. Some tiny little flicker inside me is a selfish prick and doesn’t want her to know that he’s here.
It’s possessive and shitty behavior, petty even.
But he’s mine.
And she said she had a crush on him once.
It’s not that I think she still does. It’s obvious there is no one else but Tim for her.
But still…
“Fuck, that’s a lot. I’m sorry you had to go through that alone. But I tried to be there. I left you like a million voice messages. Don’t come at me if I cussed you out in a few of them,” Tally accuses, pointing a finger at me.
I chuckle and pull my phone out of the back pocket of my jeans, turning it on.
“I need to see that,” I mumble as the screen comes up, and I have to silence the phone when the messages that come in overlap themselves, a wild beeping starting up.
I look at her with my eyebrows at my hairline, eyes wide.
“Told you.” She just shrugs, making Tim laugh into her hair as he kisses the top of her head.
When I look back down at the phone, I also see numerous messages and calls from Hunter, making my stomach drop.
I hadn’t even thought he would try to reach me.
A pang of hurt pierces my chest, and I feel like I’m going to puke.
Messages and missed calls from two other numbers I don’t have saved in my contacts are also coming in. I already guessed who they belonged to when Saylor announces from over my shoulder, “Nash and North. Seems like Nash texted you like thirty times. North stuck to calls, though.”
He’s barely finished speaking when another text from seemingly Nash comes in, and we both read it.
Nash
I’ve lost the two things I used to search for you. My heart and my ever-loving mind.
“We’re not at one of your damn poetry slams, dickhead. Just fucking tell her you’re sorry,” Saylor drones behind me while I read the message another time.
And another time.
My stomach feels even sicker.
He lost his heart? Is he saying—
The ping from the door announcing a customer pulls me out of my thoughts.
“Let’s go, guys. We can talk later,” Tally announces as she stands, the rest of us following suit. She pulls me into a hug. “So happy to have you back. I’m going to make sure you get your paycheck later.”
“Thank you,” I whisper when she lets go of me.
A hand on my shoulder turns and pulls me into a fierce hug. “Don’t do shit like that again, you hear me? Tally can’t handle losing you without a word, and if I’m honest, I can’t either,” Tim mumbles.
I want to tell him I’m sorry, but he just lets go of me and walks after his wife.
“He’s a little too touchy-feely for my taste,” Saylor accuses, arms crossed over his chest as he watches Tim go.
“Good to know I’m not the only irrational possessive one here,” I whisper to myself, but Saylor hears me and cocks an eyebrow at me, a grin forming.
“You’re possessive of me?”
Before I can answer, I’m lifted off my feet and pulled into a wide chest, big arms almost crushing me. “I’m going to hurt everyone who tries to hurt you. Don’t be afraid, little Mouse.”
“Can’t… breathe,” I press out, patting Mac on the chest.
“Sorry,” he apologizes, letting me down again.
“But just so you know, I’m not afraid of the Jones boys.
I don’t work for them. I’m not depending on their money like some others are.
” His eyes go to Tim and Tally. “So I’m not afraid to kick their asses if I have to.
If they try to stir shit, you come to me, clear? ”
“Crystal.” I smile up at him. “Thank you, Mac.”