Chapter 5
CHAPTER 5
T he smell of fresh parchment and old books hung in the air after I pushed open the heavy door to the classroom. The professor perched on the edge of their mahogany desk—the ornate, hand-crafted designs etched into the wood — worn by the passage of time, and glared at the class from the front of the room.
My eyes traveled the length of the floor to ceiling, black shelves spilling with tomes of leather books, and creased spines. The wooden frames of the shelves, adorned with intricate carvings of twisted vines, were just as beautiful as the historical texts they held.
This always was one of my favorite rooms.
Professor Elgon pushed his half-moon glasses up the bridge of his nose, then cast his eyes to me. “You are late, Miss Bathory.”
“Sorry, Sir.”
I took my seat at the front of the class, sensing the eyes boring into the back of my head. Dark gray light filtered through the arched windows, inlaid with led crisscrossed patterns, casting shadows onto the ground. I ran my fingers along the sides of my splintering desk, then pulled my book of The Advanced History of Magic from my backpack.
A ball of parchment whooshed through the air from someone behind me, landing in the chandelier, its long branches of metal hanging like vines and inlaid with melted beeswax candles. A second ball hit the back of my head, and I whipped my head around to see Jayde, giggling.
Fucking bitch.
I shot her a venomous glare, then tried to focus on today’s lesson, which ironically was about ancestors.
“Everyone to page 132,” Professor Elgon announced, and ran his hand through his brown curls. “Today we will be discussing the origins of Sirens.”
Jayde scoffed from behind me, and I let out a small sigh. But the professor’s brown eyes hovered over me for a moment longer. “Beautiful creatures,” he announced, and I squirmed in my seat until he averted his gaze. “They originated from the island of Cape Sirenorai, off the coast of Italy. Naturally, there are many myths surrounding the creatures, many dating back to Greek mythology. Can anyone tell me the true origins of the siren sisters?”
I glanced around, but no one spoke up. Hesitantly, I cleared my throat and everyone’s eyes snapped to me. “There, um, were two sisters who lived on Cape Sirenorai. Today, there are many more who live there,” I added, although it wasn’t what he asked. “It is said the two sisters were mortal descendants who were drowned at sea by the men who ruined them over four-hundred years ago. The goddess breathed life back into their souls and allowed them to enact their vengeance.”
“Very good, Miss Bathory. Can you tell us how they enacted their revenge?”
I nodded, but my breath caught in my throat. “They used their all-encompassing beauty, said to shift depending on who saw them, to lure men to the island from passing ships.”
“Wait?” A voice sounded beside me, and I noticed Thomas for the first time, sitting with his head buried in his hands. Slowly, he raised his eyes to the professor. “They’re shifters?”
“No,” I replied, then pushed the defensiveness from my tone. “Their appearance never physically changed. It was a mental power, like a psychic link they had with the men, allowing them to see only what they wanted to see. Physically, they were said to be really attractive, however.”
Jayde snorted. “Clearly that didn’t pass down to all their descendants.”
I gritted my teeth, but the professor hushed the class before I could retort back. “Does anyone know where their powers are held in their bodies? We know witches hold their powers in the heart. Phantoms in their sacral.”
“Their heads,” I stated, and he smiled toothily. “That’s why we’re not supposed to cut our hair often.”
“Yes. The two sisters, before they were drowned, were targeted because of their hair. They had very long, black hair and in those times, people were superstitious. They cut the woman’s hair off before they drowned them, and when they were brought back to life, the goddess restored their beauty, enhancing it even. So, yes, the sirens' powers are held in their minds.”
He continued into origins, but I zoned out as soon as he started talking about the immense dark powers sirens held, because of vengeance, and how often most of them went mad because of it. Especially half-mortal, half-sirens, because our human morality is constantly warring with our siren side. As the class lingered on, my magic pulsed under my skin. Everything is singed by grief and I cannot escape it, even here, in textbooks. My dad’s death lingered everywhere, and I can’t help but wonder if he did take his own life because of his powers. I knew he struggled with it, falling into deep periods of depression, but I never believed he would actually commit to the act he sometimes spoke of.
Holding on to any other belief about his death was all that kept me going; not knowing was my safety net. Because without conclusive proof, I could create another story in my mind, where my dad was the victim of something terrible, something external, but not his own mind.
If I did believe that, then I’d have to succumb to the idea that I would be heading for the same fate one day.
The moment the bell rang, I ran out of the class and toward the bathroom. I slammed the door behind me, then breathed in several deep breaths before holding the air in my lungs. The panic attack was imminent, just thinking about him was a trigger, and my fingers trembled with untapped power.
Gods, what was happening to me?
After a few minutes, the door opened and Amara and Jayde tumbled inside. I shook my head and tried to hurry out, but Amara grabbed me before I could.
Amara glared at me through her reflection in the mirror, then her eyes darted to Jayde as she washed her hands. “What do you think Jayde? Think she’s a danger to us? You heard Professor Elgon. Sirens end up going insane half the time.”
“I’m half-siren,” I snapped. “Besides, if you think I’m dangerous, then perhaps you should heed my warning and get the fuck out of my way.”
Jayde shrugged, then stood in front of the door, blocking it. “Perhaps that’s really why your dad died? Maybe he went mad and shot his brains out so he wouldn’t hurt anyone.” She tapped a long nail on her lips. “You should do the same, save us the trouble of killing you when you become rabid.”
All the blood drained from my face. “What the hell did I ever do to you?”
Jayde’s face warped. “Everyone thinks you’re so special. So beautiful . But I see through that bullshit fa?ade,” she sneered.
I scoffed. Was this really happening? Were they jealous ?
Amara continued. “That’s probably why Jax was talking to you.” She flicked her long hair over her shoulder. Her brown eyes focused on me—like a viper ready to attack. “Because you’ve compelled him or something. It’s pathetic.”
The mention of his name snapped me out of the shock restraining me. I shook my head. “Actually, you’re the pathetic one, Amara.” I laughed manically, something dark and powerful building in my core. “This is all about a guy? Do you think if you crawl after him long enough, he’ll fuck you again?”
Her chest heaved. She looked like a volcano ready to erupt.
“That’s what I thought,” I said and turned away from them. “Now get out before I show you some of that madness you’re both so concerned about.”
Amara swallowed hard, then rolled her eyes, acting unbothered although her pupils shrunk to pinpoints. She walked out, pushing the door against the wall with enough force to crack a black tile.
The moment they were gone, I hurried into a stall and locked it. I felt overwhelmed suddenly, as if the numbness was slowly peeling away and I knew I was forced to deal with everything underneath. I checked my backpack as a distraction and the phone buzzed from on top of my Mastering Potions textbook.
I just saw you with Amara and Jayde. Did they hurt you, pet?
I didn’t reply. I held the phone in my hands and slowly, one by one, tears slipped down my cheeks. I didn’t know what specifically I was crying about, but the list of things I should cry about was lengthy. My heart raced, adrenaline soared through my veins, and before long, I was trembling. I wanted to scream and scream until my voice dried out.
Another text appeared on my phone.
If you don’t respond in ten seconds, I’m coming in there to get you.
I bit my cheek, then quickly replied. I’m fine, asshole. Now, fuck off for once.
What was with him? He didn’t even know me. I almost wrote to him and told him to stop writing to me, but the dream from last night lingered in my thoughts. Something was brewing that I couldn’t put my finger on.
After a few minutes, I calmed myself down. I was too tired to stay mad or sad. My eyelids felt like tiny weights were attached to them and my temples throbbed.
I walked out of the cubicle and checked the mirror. “Great,” I said aloud and wiped the streaks of mascara from my cheeks. Red blotches covered my face and neck and veins slithered across the whites of my eyes. I checked the time on the clock over the trash can. I missed the start of class.
I couldn’t bear for anyone to see me like that, so I grabbed my bag from on top of the sink and hurried out of the restroom, walking right to the front doors.
I headed toward the only place where I knew I could be alone without being badgered. I walked down the long-cobbled path through the woods surrounding campus until I made it to the bench beneath a maple tree covered in knots and sat down.
The sun was overly warm for September. It beat down on my back and head, making me feel more exhausted than I already felt.
I welcomed the deafening silence among the trees. They seemed to breathe with me on each inhale and exhale. Here, no one stared at me or asked questions. Their eyes didn’t track me as if I was some pitiful lamb.
My hands were shaking vigorously. I wasn’t cold, they just did that when I was upset. I sat on them, trying to calm myself down. I looked up and watched the leaves as they drifted to the ground.
I rubbed my eyes and took several deep breaths. I had completely lost all sense of who I used to be. I didn’t know who I was anymore. I was a shell of my old self, but I wasn’t sure I missed her.
Being alone gave me some relief. I let my tears fall, but this time I didn’t stop myself. My heart ached—I was finally feeling again, which I guessed was a good thing, but it was agony, and I needed it to end.
I sat for ten minutes, just staring at the leaves, and allowing myself to break.
My phone vibrated next to me. I turned my head just as the screen lit up as it laid on the bench seat, Lalita’s smiling face showed above the text alert.
You weren’t in class. Did you go home?
The buzzing continued. I huffed, then glanced at my phone again. This time it was Jax.
It’s a beautiful spot.
Wide-eyed I looked around. Phantom claws scraped down my spine. “Jax?” I shouted.
It was quiet, unnaturally so. No bird song greeted my ears as I strained to hear something. Anything. However, I could make out each distinct thump of my heart.
A twig snapped much too close to me. I ran, adrenaline pumped through my veins, pushing me to run faster. I looked behind me. Nothing was following me, but I couldn’t shake the feeling of being followed.
My breath sawed in and out of my lungs as I sprinted. A flash of a masked figure darted into my peripheral vision, then disappeared just as quickly.
I scanned the forest on both sides of the path, but the next thing I knew, my boot got caught on a stray root growing through the stones making up the path.
My vision went white for a split second before the pain in my knee registered .
Blood seeped into the tear in my jeans as I limped toward a break in the trees, then looked behind me. Thankfully, nothing but an empty path and woods greeted me. As I worked on regulating my breathing, my vision cleared fully, revealing my surroundings. The eerie sensation of DeJa’Vu skittered over me like rats clawing within the walls of my mind.
“There’s no way,” I whispered.
The air at my back shifted, and I whirled around. A scream tore through my throat as a masked man slapped his hand over my mouth. He turned me away from him, keeping his hand in place, and sealed our bodies together.
“You know, the first sign of insanity is talking to yourself.” The familiar scent of sandalwood and pine filled my airways. “Luckily for you, pet, I like the unhinged ones.”
“You dick!” I yelled. “Why didn’t you just come out and say hello like a fucking normal person?”
He put his hands up in the air. “What would be the fun in that?”
I ground my teeth. I jabbed a finger into his hard chest. “You scared the shit out of me.”
He smirked. “You’re cute when you’re mad. Has anyone told you that?”
Rage bubbled in the pit of my stomach. “It’s not funny!” He grinned. “No,” I seethed. “Stop smiling.”
“My sincerest apologies,” he said, the words thickly lined with sarcasm. His gaze tracked over the woods surrounding the dying meadow we stood in, then unceremoniously peeled the mask from his face and dropped it. “Have you been here before?”
His eyes took shape as the sun got higher in the sky. He appeared almost feline. But I couldn’t decide if I found that trait attractive or terrifying. “Uh… no.” My eyes darted toward my shoes. “Maybe,” I muttered.
My breath hitched as the warmth from his knuckle seeped into my chin as he raised it, and I was forced to meet his gaze. “You’re a terrible liar, Zellie. We’ll have to work on that.”
“You said that I was in your dreams. Well, were you in my dream last night?” I asked as if that was a perfectly normal topic of conversation and I didn’t sound insane.
He lifted a dark brown eyebrow. “No.”
Disappointment welled beneath my ribs. “Oh.”
“You were in mine, though.”
My jaw dropped a little. “What?”
“Yeah. Perhaps we were in each other's.” He said nonchalantly.
“You were right. I think there’s something to it.” Was it some cosmic connection? But why was it with Jax and what did the tower have to do with it?
My dad had said that he always felt a draw to Mother. I truly do not understand how he pursued a relationship with that vile woman, but fate clearly enjoys fucking with people’s happiness. Dad explained that somehow, he knew before she came into his life that she was the one. I never understood it, but perhaps seeing Jax in my dreams was no different.
“Was that a smile?”
“Almost.” I teased. “But I’d never smile at a phantom.”
“Half-phantom,” he corrected.
“But just as dark as a full one.”
He shrugged. “Says you. I can feel your magic from here, little siren. It’s revolting,” he said, but drew closer, his pupils dilating. “Regardless, it seems we need to work together, for now at least.”
“Sure, I mean the dreams can’t be a coincidence.”
The corners of his lips twitched as if he held back a smile. “I never thought it was a coincidence.”
“What does it mean, then?” I asked, doing my best to keep the cynicism out of my tone.
He looked over at the meadow, then held out his hand. “Do you trust me?”
I snorted. “No.”
“Good. Trust no one. We know how humanity looks undressed don’t we, pet?”
“Perhaps, but I try not to be.”
“Suppress it, and it’ll eat you alive.”
I sighed. “Are you going to tell me or not?”
“Why don’t I show you instead.”
Curious, I wrapped my palm around his. His fingers closed around mine, nearly engulfing my entire hand, and I allowed him to lead me through the meadow. As we walked through the tall grass, I pursed my lips.
“You asked about my sleep. Does that have something to do with this too? Some sort of strange dream travel or something?”
He didn’t look back at me. “Not dream travel, no. More like a calling.”
“To what?”
He didn’t answer me. “There,” he said, then pointed a tattooed finger at a structure in the distance coming into view.
I did a double take as the cracked stone covered in half rotten ivy came into view.
“Unbelievable.” I gasped. “Un-fucking-believable.” I covered my mouth with both hands, then took a step back, but Jax mirrored me, remaining so close the heat from his body penetrated my hoodie.
Jax tucked a stray lock of golden hair behind my ear. “Almost.” He said snarkily. “But I assure you it’s very real, pet.”
“I…I’ve dreamed about this tower,” I said in disbelief. “Unholy shit. King of fucking Demons himself.” The taste of copper flooded my taste buds as I bit my lip viciously to stop my rambling words.
The tower loomed over us, its towering presence so much more than sheer mass as we stepped into the front yard. The entire area had powerful energy, an overwhelming spiritual presence. The air buzzed along every inch of my exposed skin. I ran my fingers down my forearm, only to flinch away as a zap stung them.
“Overwhelming, isn’t it?” Jax stated, his eyes roving over row upon row of unmarked graves, jutting out like uneven starbursts that surrounded the tower. “After the tower kept showing itself in my dreams, I came looking for it. I’m surprised you didn’t.”
The unkept headstones cast long shadows over the browning grass, their reach shrinking the closer they were to the tower’s stone base. Ivy crawled from the stone, reaching some of the blank grave markers, and swallowed them whole.
“I was lo-.” I cleared my throat, the sound cleaving through the silence. “I didn’t leave the house all summer. I was busy and didn’t want to leave,” I lied, because I wasn’t about to go into my unhinged mother and her rules...”
Jax shook his head, then ran a tattooed hand through his wild, dark waves. “Don’t let lies spill past those pretty lips, pet. I can sense them.”
We stopped at what appeared to be the only entrance to the tower. Cold, damp air whistled through the cracks in the thick oak door, fluttering the wisps of hair framing my face.
I craned my neck painfully to meet Jax’s searing gaze as he stared down at me. The intensity of his concentration was wholly focused on my lips, awakening something primal and raw within me.
But it wasn’t me. It was my siren side. Something about his phantom magic drew me in. Or perhaps it was just him. I didn’t like it. It was unknown and unnerving. Yet, my magic yearned for him.
My lips parted as his thumb skated across my full lower lip, the contrast of his rough skin on mine akin to licking an exposed wire.
He pulled back, his eyes widening with shock, as much as mine were. “Come on, siren,” he growled, and turned, shaking his head. He pressed his palms together, then twisted them before pressing them against the door. A jagged crack spread vertically where his hands connected with the marred oak a moment before an ear shattering squeak of wood against wood rented the air. I threw my hands over my ears as the door fell into two halves. Unholy shit.
I squinted into the depths of the tower, but barely any light penetrated its interior. With a groan, my feet practically dragged to slow my pace as my eye twitched with unease. Nothing good can come from entering this place.
However, I followed him through the door, heedless of my instincts to flee, and sneezed as the dusty air reached my nose.
“I’ve been here before.” Jax and I both snapped our fingers. Small flames appeared on our fingertips. Deep blue and violet light finally chased away a bit of my niggling worry. “I mean asides from in my dreams,” I admitted, pacing around the circular room, and running my fingers along the countless doors, curiously absent of handles or knobs, built into the stone walls. The inside of the tower was much bigger than it appeared from the outside, some unknown magic expanding the original space. Power radiated into my fingertips through each sealed door.
I hissed, then hinged at the waist and clutched my head as screeching pain burned through me. I clamped my eyes shut and let out a short scream.
Jax rushed to my side and scooped me into his arms. “Fuck. I hoped the power in this space would affect you, but not this drastically.”
“I think I came here when I was a kid to escape my mother, but I can’t be sure,” I whimpered through panting breaths. My skull felt like it was moments from cracking. “It feels like there are foggy memories struggling to break free of my subconscious,” I moaned, then buried my face in his chest.
My body jostled as he strode toward the exit. “This was a mistake. We?—”
“No!” I interrupted him. “Please, show me why you brought me here. It’s okay, the pain is lessening already.” It was, the longer he held me, the quicker it receded.
Jax’s nostrils flared as he huffed. My fingers scraped over his dark stubble, as I smoothed them over the vein ticking in his jaw. “Please?”
He swallowed audibly, then nodded and moved to the massive, rust speckled circular staircase to the right of the door.
“You can put me down now.”
He snorted. “No.”
I looked up as he placed his boot on the bottom step, then hid my smile against his tattooed neck and let it go. There was an endless expanse of stairs above us. If Jax wanted to carry me the whole way, I wouldn’t stop him.
The metal groaned under his weight as we ascended. He looked at his boots as he climbed, dodging holes and gaps where the stairs rotted through entirely as he went.
I ran my hand down the wall splattered with blood turned brown with age each time we circled close enough.
“Something truly dark happened here.” He told me.
The tragic energy sunk beneath my skin and crawled into my bones. I shivered, then wrapped my arms around myself. Jax tightened his arms around me.
The floor far above us creaked. My body tensed, then my head flew back. Splits and gouges scarred the surface of the thick wooden beams supporting the stone floor of the next level.
Finally, we emerged on a landing.
I gasped, then clung to Jax’s neck as he adjusted me, one of my ass cheeks now firmly filling his hands, then slid my body down his. My boots thumped against the intricate metal beneath us, each piece woven together intricately like the web of a spider. Normally it would be a struggle not to notice every plain of muscle as our bodies connected, but the lure of the solitary black maple door drew me to it. Tendrils of magic wrapped around my limbs and tugged gently. I glided over, my eyes inspecting every inch. Like the others, there was no knob.
“How do we get in?”
“Like this.”
Jax brushed past me, his body rapidly turning transparent, then disappeared through the wood.