Chapter 21
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
A.J. waited until Ana had fallen asleep to leave her room. He’d have preferred to stay and hold her, but he begrudgingly had to call the team and check for updates.
He’d failed to mention to his team that, in a roundabout way, he’d dropped the news on Ana that her unit chief Gray was on his team’s side.
Of course, A.J. had only discovered that tidbit when he’d spoken to Harper and Natasha by way of split-screen while Ana had taken her post-pond-orgasm shower.
Natasha had been resistant to tell his team Gray’s identity as the colleague on her new task force, but with Chris and A.J.
both trying to throw Gray’s name into the guilty hat, she’d been forced to speak up.
When Harper had informed him she’d had enough of his yawning and insisted he get some sleep, he hadn’t objected.
He felt bad taking rack time when his team was working, but within a minute of lying down on the bed in a guest room after removing his shorts and shirt, he’d passed out cold.
“She’s a hot one.” The familiar voice came out of nowhere, shocking him awake. “Smart. Funny.”
“Huh?” A.J. turned his head to the side trying to determine where the voice was coming from, not to mention why the hell he was lying on a hard surface. Hadn’t he just gone to sleep? In a bed?
He pushed up on his forearms after finding himself flat on his belly on the porch out back, shifted to a sitting position, and came face-to-face with Marcus, who was sitting in one of Grant’s rocking chairs.
A.J. blinked and slapped his cheeks twice. Am I dreaming, or is this real? He stood and peered down at his body, finding himself in only his boxer briefs.
“Oh, and the back-and-forth between you two is the thing of romance novels,” Marcus went on, ignoring A.J.’s confused stare.
“Whaaaaat? Did you read one of Savanna’s novels?” He smiled, deciding to stay in this dream if his buddy was going to pay him a visit. “You did, didn’t you?”
“No, I read a couple before I met her.” Marcus flicked a hand in the air. “How do you think I won over a woman like Savanna? Learned from the pages of a novel how to woo a woman.”
“Am I dreaming?”
“You tell me.” Marcus shot him his signature smile and braced the chair arms, closing his eyes as he continued to rock.
“That bump you got on your head Saturday wasn’t that bad, but how many times have I told you over the years, you gotta stop being an idiot and see a doc every once in a while. You get banged up too often.”
A.J. scrubbed his hands up and down his face and tried to get a grip, to determine if he was sleep walking, or still back in the guest room sound asleep and dreaming. “My head is fine.”
“You always say that. Stubborn.” Marcus shook his head, eyes remaining shut. “At least you don’t sleep commando.”
A.J. rolled his eyes, forgetting for a moment this wasn’t real. Marcus was buried in Birmingham thirty minutes away from there. He wasn’t on Grant’s back porch right now. And A.J. probably wasn’t either.
“So, let’s talk about this FBI hottie. Why’d it take you so long to reach out to her? You scared she might bite?”
“I wasn’t scared,” A.J. protested, folding his arms across his chest and pouting like a kid in trouble.
He had so much he wanted to say to Marcus. So much to apologize for. A.J. should have been at his side the day he died. If he had, Marcus might still be alive. Fuck orders from the top. The top didn’t always know the best course of action for an op.
“You haven’t had a serious girlfriend in years. Actually, no girlfriends since I died.” Marcus opened his eyes and slowed his rocking, his brown gaze meeting A.J.’s. “I’ve been worried about you. But based on that kiss I saw you lay on your FBI hottie, maybe you’re finally coming to your senses.”
“Have you been watching us? Spying?”
“I’m not so sure you have room to talk. Weren’t you spying on her?”
A.J. pinched the bridge of his nose. “We should be talking about you, not her right now. You’re here, and I have stuff to say.”
“If you even think about dropping a lo siento, I’ll get up out of this chair and knock the shit out of you.
Understood? Terrorist motherfuckers killed me.
They’re now toast. Justice served. What happened to me ain’t on you.
Or Luke or anyone else. You would’ve died, too, if you’d been with me, and that would’ve killed me.
” He grinned. Dark humor even in death. “But I’m here because I’m worried about you, brother. ”
“Because of my lack of a love life?” he questioned. A spiral of guilt that Marcus was gone still clung to him like the humidity after an Alabama afternoon rainstorm.
“Trusting a traitor is dangerous, but not letting yourself fall for the woman of your dreams is the deadliest sin of all.”
A.J. jerked his head back in surprise. “Did you just paraphrase my made-up fortune cookie message?”
Marcus cracked a smile, showing his white teeth, then brushed back a lock of dark hair from his tan skin, pushing it away from his forehead.
“Seriously, bro, I just want to make sure you’re good.
It’s time to move on. Be happy. Stop being so guilty and stubborn.
” His tone grew more serious. “No more letting your dick take the lead to avoid feeling anything in your heart or head.”
“My dick is just fine.” A.J. muttered an amused curse under his breath. “And so is my head.” Another curse. “This head,” he said while tapping at his skull.
“So, once you fall for this woman, you’re not going to freak out and take off?
Feel guilty when you start to experience some happiness?
” he challenged. Typical Marcus. “Because this woman is different, I can tell. I think she’s the one for you.
And I don’t want you giving her up because of some bullshit notion that you shouldn’t have happiness because I’m dead.
” He was quiet for a moment. “You have to stop blaming yourself for my death. It wasn’t your fault. ”
“But I—” A.J. dropped his words at the sound of a woman’s voice.
“I better go, brother. Someone is here for you.” Marcus tossed a hand in the air, waving goodbye. “And, A.J., be careful. I don’t want to see you on the other side anytime soon.”
“A.J.?” Someone was patting his cheeks. Saying his name.
A.J. jerked his eyes open in surprise.
So, he was on the porch. Marcus wasn’t in the chair anymore. But what did it mean that it was still rocking?
“Hey, what are you doing outside?” Ana asked.
A.J. blinked slowly, letting his eyes adjust to the floodlight she’d turned on.
“You were talking in your sleep.” She was on her knees next to where he sat.
His eyes darted back to the rocking chair that was no longer moving.
Was it ever moving, or am I really losing it?
“I haven’t sleepwalked since I was seven,” he confessed. “I don’t remember coming out here.”
“I came downstairs to get water, then realized the back door was open. I looked outside and saw you out here.”
“Shit, I’m sorry if I startled you.” He was too tired, too confused, too embarrassed. “What was I saying out here?”
“Something about a fortune cookie.” She stood and offered her hand for an assist. “No American flag boxers this time?”
He followed her gaze down his nearly naked body to his black boxer briefs.
“Nah, I save those for special occasions,” he managed a joke somehow, still trying to shake off the weird dream where he’d had a conversation with his dead best friend.
“Like a first kiss.” And he hoped it was the first of many.
A.J. stole another look back at the chair, the memory of Marcus still so fresh in his mind he was struggling to believe what was real right now. When he faced Ana again, he set a hand to her shoulder. To make sure she was really there.
“You okay?” she asked, a worried look in her eyes.
“Of course.” Although after his weird sleepwalking dream, the answer was more of a coin toss. “You should get back to bed. Sun isn’t up quite yet.” He retracted his hand and walked across the porch. Taking a deep breath, he leaned his forearms on the railing and raked a hand through his hair.
He twitched when she placed her hand to his back, but she didn’t back away. “What’s going on? You can tell me.” Her tone softened. “I did bare my soul on this very porch a few hours ago. You could do the same if you’d like.”
His eyes went to the tattoo on the inside of his forearm, and he straightened, tracing the letters of the inscription inked on his skin with his forefinger. “A lot of the guys got tattoos after Marcus died,” he said softly. “Liam got the lion. Everyone always said Marcus had the heart of one.”
“Marcus was the guy Asher replaced, right?” Adriana must have filled Ana in.
The day A.J. was recruited in 2013 by Jessica and Luke Scott to leave his SEAL platoon and work off-the-books missions popped to mind at her question.
Not my fault you died, huh? But wasn’t it?
“Yeah, but Marcus joined Scott and Scott because of me. I didn’t want to join without him, so Luke and Jessica made the offer to him as well.
Marcus was one of the best trackers anyway.
We needed him.” His stomach wrenched at the memory.
“We were best friends. Went to college together. I was the best man at his wedding. So, you see, how could I start a new adventure without him?”
Her hands smoothed up and down his back in reassuring, comforting strokes.