Chapter 34
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
NEW YORK CITY, NEW YORK – THREE DAYS LATER
Julia lifted her glass and took a sip of her French martini, her sister-in-law’s favorite, and studied Kate and Michael sitting across the booth at the bar in Tribeca.
Michael had his arm wrapped adoringly around his wife, pinning her tight to his side, and Kate had her head resting on his shoulder.
That was love. A sweet, forever kind of love Julia hadn’t known she craved until . . . until Finn.
Until Dalton. Her thighs squeezed beneath the table at the memory of the first night they’d made love in Dubai. It’d only been three days since he’d raced the Lamborghini, and she missed him already.
“We lost you. Where are you at?” Fingers snapped in front of her face.
“Dubai,” Julia whispered and followed the long fingers to her friend sitting beside her. She set her eyes on Mya, who’d helped not only save Oliver by leading her to Giorgio but had ultimately brought Finn into her life.
“You ever going to tell us the dirty details of what happened out there?” Mya waggled her brows.
“Can you save those details for when I use the men’s room?” Michael released his hold of his wife, sat taller, and offered Julia his standard brotherly cringe.
“I would hope she’ll need more time than the few minutes it takes you to use the restroom.” Kate linked her hand with Michael’s on top of the table.
Michael grabbed his beer with his free hand and closed his eyes as if trying to banish all thoughts of his sister doing things he didn’t want to know about in the first place.
“You all really didn’t need to fly to New York to check on me. You’re still unpacking.” Julia redirected the conversation away from her sex life, and her brother threw her a grateful look.
“Mom and Dad have the kids, and Kate and I have two quick nights away. It’s not exactly a hardship to visit you.” He smiled. “Plus, after everything you went through, I’m going to check in on my little sister.”
“And you know for damn sure I’m checking up on you.” Mya elbowed her, and Julia nearly spilled her drink on her silky blue blouse. “I’m just so relieved Oliver is okay.”
“No thanks to me,” Michael said under his breath. “Sorry again.”
“Everything happens for a reason.” How could she not believe that now after the last few weeks?
“So, where is Miss Lois Lane off to next?” Julia once again changed the subject, unable to share the details about what really went down out in that desert or risk getting Finn and his teammates in trouble.
“We’ll see where the wind blows.” Mya flitted her hand in the air.
“Your father would prefer that the wind kept you local,” Michael said in his predictably no-nonsense tone.
Mya’s father was a judge in the city, and the man had to worry about her and her crazy adventures. He wasn’t father of the year from the little Julia knew about him, but he was still a father. Didn’t most fathers worry?
“You know I’ll do the opposite of what dear old dad wants.”
Julia set down her drink and looked around the room, half hoping to see Finn watching over her from the bar, the way he’d done the night she’d lured Lorenzo out for drinks.
But no, he wasn’t standing there, nor were Harper and Roman.
And her heart sank a little. She’d really enjoyed hanging out with Harper and had even envisioned what it would be like to be friends with her as well as Jessica.
“How’s Mason? I haven’t talked to him in a bit,” Kate slyly asked Mya, obviously poking around. Curious to know if they were still friends with benefits, which most of them seemed to know about even though Mason and Mya had tried to keep it on the DL.
Mya had just taken a sip of her drink and nearly spit it out. “He’s good, I think.”
“He’s dating someone.” Michael frowned. “The wrong someone.”
“Ah.” Mya shrugged. “She looks like a Barbie to me. I mean, she’s a swimsuit model.” She drummed the fingers of her free hand on the table. “Anyway, maybe I ought to get one of those water bungalows somewhere and just chill for a week or so. Just me, the ocean, and—”
“You’d be bored out of your mind,” Kate cut her off.
“No.” Julia smiled. “She’d manage to get herself into some trouble. Accidentally uncover a salacious story.”
Mya looked at her and laughed. “You’re right. I would.”
“I think I might, um, head back home now, though,” Julia announced a few moments later.
As fun as it had been to spend time with everyone, she was in the mood to listen to sad music and wallow in self-pity.
Or, more precisely, revisit the time she and Finn had spent together in hopes it would help her work up the courage to put on her big-girl panties and push through her issues so they could be together.
“You sure?” Michael tipped his head to the side and released Kate’s hand to go for his wallet after she responded with a nod.
Once they were outside at the curb, Michael opened the door of the limo he’d insisted she take for safety reasons, and after she said her goodbyes to Kate and Mya, he gently laid a hand on her arm. “Julia.”
“Yeah?” She lifted a brow, preparing herself to challenge whatever it was he intended to say using his big-brother tone.
“Finn loves you. I saw it in his eyes on that beach in Dubai.” Michael glanced at a couple passing by.
“But he could die.” He briefly looked at Mya, who was a few feet away talking to his wife, ensuring they were out of earshot.
“The work he does is dangerous. I don’t see a man like him trading in his job for love, though. ”
“I would never ask him to.” Never.
Her stomach did sad little flips at the message her brother was trying to drive home. Be sure. Be absolutely freaking sure you can handle being with Finn before jumping into things with him. The forever kind of sure.
“I don’t want to see you in pain again. After Tuck died, I thought I’d lose you, too.” He’d never confided that before, but until he met Kate, he’d been a one-night-stand, hide-his-emotions kind of guy.
“But you didn’t lose me.”
“Because you buried yourself in work with the company. And you let go of your dreams to do it.” He set his large hand on her shoulder and lightly squeezed. “Maybe pick your camera up again, and see if things look differently through that lens.”
She smiled. “When did you become all wordsmithy?”
He looked to Kate, the love of his life. His ride or die. “I think you know the answer to that.” After he gave her a hug, she waved goodbye to everyone and slipped inside the limo to be alone with her thoughts.
Upon entering her condo, she reached for the light switch but realized the lights were already on. She frowned as a tingling sensation crept up her spine. “No one is here,” she told herself.
But she’d go get her 9mm and clear the apartment the way her brother had taught her to do. And hope no one was in her bedroom already.
As she walked past her office on her way to her room, she halted. The light was on in there, and . . .
“That thief,” Julia said, shaking her head.
She wasn’t in danger. No, she’d been robbed.
She entered her office to find a note stuck to the wall behind her desk, where her Warhol had been, and couldn’t help but chuckle.
She removed the hot-pink sticky note from the wall.
I couldn’t help myself. Old habits die hard. Stealing is so much more fun. X, Jack
“Once a thief, always a thief.” She set the note on her desk and left the room for her bedroom, still chuckling. Joan sure had her work cut out for her if she wanted her husband to stop his wicked ways. “Good luck,” she said under her breath as she entered her en suite.
She grabbed her phone and discarded her purse, then turned on the shower, knowing exactly what she wanted to do. No, what she needed to do.
Julia opened YouTube on her phone to play the One Night in Dubai song, removed her heels, then stepped into the shower fully dressed.
She closed her eyes and gasped when the water, still a bit cold, hit her.
Memories of joining Finn inside that shower in Aswan, both of them fully clothed, and him giving her the first orgasm she’d had in ages filled her mind.
And she slowly lowered to her knees and bowed her head beneath the spray and prayed that walking away from him when their plane touched down in the U.S.
hadn’t been the biggest mistake of her life.
OUTER BANKS, NORTH CAROLINA
Julia stood inside the darkroom she’d asked her father to close up after Tucker died years ago and looked around. After her shower last night, she’d packed a bag and hopped on the first flight to North Carolina the next morning.
She’d known what she needed to do. Her brother was right. Finn had said the same thing to her in Dubai as well.
She needed to come there. To unlock the darkroom and find herself again. To find the woman she’d locked away, the woman who Finn had helped wake up.
Julia closed her eyes for a moment, drew in a breath of musty air, then waved off the dust that filled her gaze upon parting her lids.
She slowly walked around the room, at first just looking at everything and taking it all in. The enlargers, lenses, photo paper that was probably no good now, and tongs. Then she made a second journey around the room to physically touch it all.
Her fingers skimmed over the plastic trays she’d once used and onto the little bottles, now empty of chemicals.
Everything was still in its place, including her Canon she hadn’t touched since Tucker’s accident.
Before she’d opened the darkroom that morning, she’d stopped in town and bought a new camera. A fresh start. She’d gone with a Nikon, not only because she believed it to be a superior choice but because she’d used a Nikon with Finn.
As she’d clicked photo after photo in the Lahbab Desert with Finn, she’d been creating new memories, memories she didn’t want to lock away and forget. And why would she?
They may have been working to take down a bad guy at the time, but she wanted to hang on to everything else that had happened.
Julia smiled as other happy memories filled her thoughts. “You’re in a better place,” she whispered her thoughts to Tucker, lifting her chin. “But I’m not ready for you to take Finn there with you. Okay?”
Would he answer? Probably not.
But she had to try.
After she cleaned up the room and prepped it for use, she went back into the house to retrieve her new camera and started outside for the beach.
It was a clear day. No clouds in sight. No storm on the horizon.
The sand felt good on her bare feet as she padded her way toward the water and lifted the camera to take a photo of the waves rolling in, creating a soft foam on the beach.
A few more shots and she was already feeling better. More alive.
She started to lower her camera when she heard a noise in the distance. The thundering thud of hooves pounding through wet sand had her bringing the camera back to her eye and pivoting around to see a wild horse running along the water’s edge.
Her chest tightened at the sight, and she captured the moment, remembering Finn’s comment about the photo she had over her couch back in New York the morning before they’d gone to Egypt.
And now, here she was.
As the horse neared her, she stepped back and removed the camera to take in the beauty of the animal catching her eyes the moment he passed, his silky mane blowing behind him in the breeze.
She thought back to Dubai, remembering Finn’s nightmare.
This sign, this horse, was meant for him.
“And you’re not here with me.” Her stomach ached at the thought, at how much she already missed that man.
But she did her best to pull herself together and focus ahead, hoping Finn would be part of whatever was in store for her. A part of her tomorrow and every day after that.