Milo #2
“The answer to that question is the same as how I managed to get into the room,” Raf said, slapping the remote on the shelf next to a fallen can of beer.
“And what’s that?” I asked as I yanked on a shirt I’d left on the floor.
He crossed his arms over his chest, leaning against the shelves next to the TV, and smirked. “It’s a mystery. And if you weren’t busy pickling what few brain cells you have left, you’d probably be able to get them to work together long enough to figure out the answer.”
“Am I allowed to turn around now?” Marshall called over his shoulder.
“He’s decent,” Raf told him with a shake of his head. “Or, well, wearing clothes anyway. Whether or not he’s actually decent is still up for debate.”
Of all the people to find me, why did it have to be Raf?
He was the one person I didn’t have the slightest chance of being angry at, let alone being able to muster the energy to fight him.
I might not have violated any of the rules of our relationship, but I had still done him dirty, and if he didn’t know it, I certainly did.
All I could do was wince as I sat on the edge of the bed, as Marshall crossed the room to drop into the chair in the corner.
“You’re braver than I am,” Raf told him lightly, looking around. “There’s not much in here I’m willing to touch without feeling the need to soak myself in sanitizer, including Milo.”
“Geez,” I muttered. “Not that I don’t deserve it, but ouch.”
“I meant because you’ve been saturated by whatever gross is in this room,” Raf said with a roll of his eyes. “But by all means, continue to feel bad for yourself; this pity party suits you.”
“I’ve had to stay in worse places,” Marshall said with a shrug. “At one point, even having a room at all, even a questionable one, would have been a luxury.”
“I’d say that’s depressing, but there was a point in my life after I got out of my parents’ house where it was the same for me,” Raf said with a shrug. “Doesn’t mean I want the reminder.”
Marshall gave him a crooked smile. “Fair enough. Different folks, different strokes.”
“Keep up what you have today, and I might want to show you a different stroke,” Raf said with the grin I had once been struck by.
Not because it was more arrogant or humble than a standard smirk, but because it was the first one I’d ever thought of as rakish, despite usually thinking it was a corny term that deserved to stay in romance novels.
“Ugh,” I groaned as Marshall chuckled, smoothing his shirt in what I suspected was an almost nervous gesture.
“I’m sure you would,” Marshall said, and my horror mounted further when I suspected from his tone that he wasn’t necessarily against the idea.
“Oh my God,” I whimpered, covering my face. “I know I deserve to suffer, but does it have to be watching you flirt with my dad?”
“Which one?” Raf asked, and I groaned. “Because I would also hit on Marcus if I didn’t think your mom would break my fingers. She bagged herself a good-looking man.”
“He is handsome from what I’ve seen,” Marshall agreed, and I had to wonder if it was punishment for what I’d done, what kind of punishment awaited people who did truly heinous stuff?
“And he looks like Eli the same way I look like you ,” I told Marshall because I could direct my frustration at him without feeling guilty. “Not as bad, but still!”
“Yeah, and the first time I saw Eli, I thought he’d look good naked,” Raf said, raising a brow. “Now, I’m admitting that partially because it is really funny to watch you dramatically squirm, but it’s also because as a single man, I’m allowed to talk about who I find hot.”
“That never stopped you before,” I muttered, not sure why it stung for him to say he was single. Probably because we’d never talked about breaking up, even though I knew it was coming. He had clearly figured out the same thing or decided he didn’t want to be involved with me after hearing the news.
Damn it, I should have spoken to him before I locked the world away.
“True, but now I don’t have to worry about freaking you out because I was talking about Eli...well, I guess there is just Eli now.”
“I might regret this,” Marshall said. “But, uh...why was I not included in that?”
“Because I already ‘joked’ that a threesome with you and Milo here would be fun.”
“Ah, I see. I’m flattered. Absolutely the fuck not, I have stories that would horrify Milo with how degenerate they are, but absolutely not. I appreciate the compliment, though.”
“This is either hell or a drink-induced nightmare,” I said with a sigh, reaching for the bottle anyway and taking another drink, only for it to be snatched from my hands. “Hey!”
“You’ll live,” Raf said as he settled back into his spot and glanced at Marshall. “You’re driving.”
“Fair enough,” Marshall said as Raf took a drink of the tequila and set the bottle down beside him. “I see the alcohol isn’t on your list of things you don’t want to touch in the room.”
“Shitty liquor is a classic for any person, no matter how former their formerly poor is,” Raf said with a shrug. “Now...you seem decently sober, or at least not so trashed that you can’t understand important shit, but I’ve also never seen you where you were drinking all day.”
“I’m just,” I cut myself off, realizing that if I played drunk, I might get out of having to have whatever ‘talk’ Raf was looking to have with me. I would not be surprised if he was here to chew me out and leave Marshall to play nice cop and make me feel better. “Very fucked up.”
“Well, we know what that means,” Raf said, and I looked around in alarm as he and Marshall got to their feet.
“What the fuck is this?” I asked, warding them off with my hands.
“I think I can get him up, go get the water going,” Raf said as he reached for me.
Oh hell no .
“I’m not that drunk!” I yelped, scrambling across the bed to get away before he actually got hold of me.
If years of grappling with Eli had taught me anything, it was that I was not a good wrestler.
I didn’t know how good Raf was, but I knew how lacking I was, and that was more than enough. “I lied, I lied!”
“That’s what I thought,” Raf said with a snort. “Now sit there and get ready to deal with shit, because you’re long overdue.”
“God,” I groaned. “I know I’m an asshole.”
“You are,” Raf said simply, glaring at me.
“You’re an ass for how you handled this, you’re an ass for how you didn’t handle things with me, and you’re an ass for making everyone who cares about you freak out because they don’t know where you are.
And when you catch holy hell from your family because you got into a bar fight, then you’re going to shut the fuck up, stand there and let them give you shit because you deserve it. ”
“I’m a grown man,” I muttered, knowing I sounded like the very child I was protesting not to be, but I couldn’t help it. “If I want to take a break from everyone and everything, I should be allowed to.”
“You can, but you can’t just disappear without a word after big, devastating news drops.
And you sure as shit can’t do it with only a message thrown at Eli that just says ‘I’m alive’ and that you’re going dark,” Raf said, narrowing his eyes.
“This is selfish, beyond selfish. It is cruel to people who care about you.”
“Everyone’s been frantic,” Marshall said softly. “And Eli...he’s doing a good job of keeping his head up, at least appearing to, but he’s barely talking, and if anyone bothers him, he gets?—”
“Bitchy,” Raf said with a sudden frown. “And I’m not saying he’s not capable of having an attitude, but the quiet act until he’s pissed and almost taking people’s heads off thing is weird.”
My heart sank at his description, which was almost a perfect way to describe what Eli had been like as a kid when I’d first met him.
When he was still suffering from the loss of his mother, so filled with grief and pain, he didn’t know what to do with it other than lash out at the world because he was a kid who didn’t know how to express the deep well of agony he was feeling.
Except he was a full-grown man with all the capacity to express himself, so it wasn’t a lack of ability, but an overabundance of pain and grief.
“He’s heartbroken and trying not to show it,” Marshall said with a sigh. “He’s probably only managing what little he is because he’s got Eva with him constantly. She’s the only person around him right now who can handle his mood.”
Raf chuckled. “It’s funny to hear her snap right back at him when he loses his temper. She has no fear of him, not that he’d hurt her?—”
“He would never!” I gasped, eyes wide and feeling the first spark of anger in the shape of outrage blossom. “Not ever!”
“Or that she’ll somehow lose her friendship with him,” Raf continued with a roll of his eyes.
“Yes, Milo, thank you for being his white knight and defending his honor against the idea that he might strike someone he cares about because he’s pissed and upset.
I’m sure that’s exactly what he needs right now, you defending his honor from a distance while you, the one person he could use the most, is too busy bathing in your own misery. ”
Ouch.
Entirely accurate, but ouch all the same.
“What is this, bad cop, good cop?” I asked, glancing between them. “You make me feel like shit by yelling at me and telling me the hard truth, and you make me feel shit by being gentle and still telling the hard truth but in a sad voice?”