Chapter 36 – Emmett
Chapter Thirty-Six
EMMETT
“L et’s get a move on,” I mumble to Lucy, who is putting her cereal bowl in the sink while I fold the blanket I used on the couch, where I’ve been sleeping since she fucking left. I tried to go into the bed on Monday, and her smell literally drove me insane. I felt like my heart was going to come out of my chest and explode on my feet. So I hightailed it to the couch, where I’ve been ever since. “Did you grab your field trip permission form?” I ask, putting on my hat and walking out of the house with her in front of me.
I look over to the barn, like I always do, even though I know there would be no reason for her to be there since she moved her horse. It’s been almost two weeks, and every single night that I’ve sat with myself on the couch, I try to remember why I left her and then tell myself it’s for the better. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even believe my own shit that is going on in my head. I want her back so bad it hurts. But I don’t want her to have to sacrifice her hopes and dreams for me. I won’t do that to her. I’ve seen her with Lucy, and she will be the best mother she can be. I refuse to take that from her.
“Yeah,” she mumbles, walking to the truck. “Can I go riding with Lilah today?” she asks, and I stop walking.
“I don’t know,” I answer her honestly. “We’ll see.” Ever since Lilah has been gone, she’s been asking when Lilah would be coming back. When Lilah would be done with her schoolwork. Even though she sees her every single night after school, she doesn’t get it that there will never be Lilah in our house. I’m very fucking thankful she isn’t taking it out on Lucy, that the only one she isn’t talking to is me. From what I’ve seen, she treats her the same way she always treated her. She is the same bubbly person she’s always been, except to me. She hasn’t said a word to me since last week. If papers need to be delivered to me, she waits until I’m not at my desk or gets someone else to hand them to me. The only one it was pissing off was Charlie, who every single day I thought would run me over with his truck.
School drop-off goes off without a hitch as she waves at me and walks in with Saige, followed by Wyatt, who is with his own friends. I pull up to the barn a little later than normal since I took my time coming to work.
Getting out of the truck and heading into the barn, I’m almost inside when I see Charlie charging my way. “Where the fuck is Lilah?” he snaps, his voice high, and I see Bobby and Sammy both look our way.
“What do you mean, where the fuck is Lilah?” I put my hands on my hips.
“She’s not at her desk, and she isn’t answering my phone calls either,” he replies, and my fingers move with a twitch.
“How should I know where she is?”
“She’s never been late a day in her life since she started,” he states, pulling his phone out of his back pocket. He calls her again, and I hear her voice come through the phone.
“You’ve reached Lilah’s phone. I’m unable to answer your call right now.” He hangs up.
“Maybe she had an appointment and forgot to tell you.” I try to calm him down, but something doesn’t sit right. The last thing I need is to go crazy and then she shows up, seeing me going crazy. “Bobby, what time did you get here today?” I ask.
“A little after seven,” he answers, and I look at Sammy, who is holding a saddle in his hand.
“A little after Bobby,” he says.
I turn to the side, looking in the kitchen and seeing her mug is pushed on the counter. “That’s her mug,” I say, walking to the kitchen, my feet moving so fast it’s like I’m jogging. “This is her mug.” I look inside of it, seeing it’s empty. “Someone probably took it out of the dishwasher.” I put it back down on the counter.
“Check and see if her horse is in its stall.” I look at Charlie. “She might be off riding and doesn’t realize the time.”
“She would answer my fucking call,” Charlie snaps, “unless she fucking can’t.”
“Why don’t you pull up the feeds,” I urge him, hoping to get him off my case. He turns and storms back into his office. I’m right on his tail as he sits down and boots up his computer. I’m standing behind his chair, with my hands over my chest, trying not to freak out.
He pulls up the feed, and it’s all black. Every single square is black. “What the fuck is this?” he mumbles as he presses more keys. “What the fuck?”
“Call Pops,” I finally snap. “Call fucking Pops now.” I run back to the barn. “Bobby, I need you to go over to the barn at my house and see if Lilah’s truck is there.” I look over at Sammy, who looks like he’s going to be sick. “I need you to go and check on Juliet and see if she’s been there.”
I run back to my truck. “Where the fuck are you going?” Charlie asks me.
“Her house!” I shout, jumping into the truck. “Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” I yell, hitting the steering wheel as Charlie gets into the cab. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”
“Focus,” Charlie advises. “Relax.”
“You fucking relax,” I retort, racing over to her house. “How would you fucking feel if Autumn was missing?”
“We don’t know she’s missing.” His voice is trying to calm me down when the phone rings, and he picks it up. “Hello.”
“Someone tampered with the feed.” Pops’s voice fills the cab, and if I wasn’t holding the steering wheel with all of my strength, I think I would drive off the fucking side of the road.
“How the fuck is that possible?” I feel like my skin is about to come off my bones. “How the fuck”—my whole body shakes with rage, my voice ravaged—“is that possible?” I look at Charlie, repeating the same fucking question, waiting for one of them to answer me.
“I’m on my way down,” Pops says, disconnecting at the same time we pull up to her apartment. I stop and get out, leaving the truck on the side and still running before I run up the stairs two at a time. Getting to her door, I see the green light is still on, which means it’s recording.
“Her truck isn’t in the parking lot,” Charlie reports, moving me aside so he can open the door with his key.
I step in and smell her right away, the pain just so much it’s like someone kicked me in the stomach. “Fuck,” I hiss out, putting my hands on my knees. “Fucking hell.”
“Don’t do this right now,” Charlie says, looking around while he pulls up the camera feed. “She left this morning at four oh four.”
“Why the fuck is she up so fucking early?” I try to control my breathing and the rage, not sure which one is going to win over the other. For ten days, all I’ve thought about is her, yet for ten days, I’ve fought with myself about doing something about it.
“Probably the same reason you’re sleeping on your fuckin’ couch. And refusing to admit to yourself what a fucking moron you are!” he yells at me. “Fuck!” he roars out as he tosses his phone across the room. It smashes on the wall and then straight to the floor.
My phone rings, and I pick it up to see it’s Bobby. “Hello.” I close my eyes, begging him to tell me she’s there. Begging him to say it was all a mistake, and we’re all freaking out for nothing.
“She’s not here, boss,” he informs me. “No one has seen her here.”
“Okay.” I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose. “I’m going to call Sammy.” He disconnects, and I call Sammy, who answers right away.
“Hey,” he answers, “she’s not here, and Juliet is in her stall.” He breathes out. “Spoke to a couple of the guys, and they haven’t seen her yet.”
“I want everyone back at the barn,” I tell him. “Call Bobby, call the night shift, call fucking everyone,” I instruct and then look at Charlie, who has his hands on the top of his head, and I say the words I never thought I would say, “Someone took her.” The phone slips from my hand as I admit it, and I look at Charlie. “Someone took Lilah.” My vision goes almost black. “And when I find them, I’m going to kill them.”