36. Irina
Chapter 36
Irina
L uca was it for me. My person. And I loved him. Devastatingly.
I had hidden parts of myself to the world for far too long, but I wouldn’t hide what he meant to me. Not when I’d experienced the worst few weeks of my life without him, even if I was unconscious for all of it.
He had come to Russia for me despite not knowing what he’d find, choosing to believe that somehow, I’d survived the gunshot wound. Now it was time for me to show him how far I’d go for him.
Luca squeezed my hand as we walked down the corridor of my childhood home.
Everything appeared the same—as if no time had passed at all.
I glanced up at him, soaking in his beauty as butterflies fluttered in my stomach. I’d never get over him.
“You alright, sweetheart?” he asked, his caramel eyes full of warmth as he held my gaze .
I leaned up and placed a kiss on his cheek. “I already am.”
It felt right to be with him, and I couldn’t believe I tried convincing myself otherwise. There was a lightness in my chest that had only ever been present when he was near.
I followed the sound of hushed voices until I’d reached the living area, my breath catching in my throat.
“Nico?” I couldn’t believe the view of my brother and our father in conversation.
What was he doing here?
He stood up, his mouth falling open as if I’d stunned him. “Irina.”
I’d crossed the room and almost lunged at him before stopping mid-way.
He saw my hesitancy and surprised me by catching a hold of my wrist, pulling me into his chest. He wrapped his arms around me tightly. “I’m so glad you’re alive.”
“Me too,” I whispered, clutching his shirt, my heart soaring.
It would’ve been one of my biggest regrets not getting to know him.
I stepped back and glanced at my father before catching Nico’s brown eyes. “What are you doing here?”
“You were right before.” He shrugged, running a hand through his disheveled hair. “I can’t escape my fate.”
I blinked at him, hoping he wasn’t planning on doing what I was thinking.
“I’ve decided to stay in Russia.”
Panic rose in my throat, and the sudden emotion felt uncalled for when this had been the plan all along .
“Did you have something to do with this?” I asked, narrowing my gaze at my father.
I had been wrong before. Nicolai could escape his fate; he could alter it. If he didn’t want to be the next Pakhan, then he could say no. It had only taken a gunshot wound to the chest for me to realize I also had choices.
“Yes, because I’d been so successful in my endeavors before.” Sarcasm laced my father’s tone, but the underlying steel peaked through, reminding me of who exactly I was dealing with.
Ivan Morozov was feared by all and for no other reason than being a vicious leader who did as he pleased without considering others.
Yet he never let me be on the receiving end of his wrath, let alone raising his voice at me.
He stood from his seat, hands behind his back as he regarded me with the same shade of blue eyes I had. “He wants this, Irina.”
“Roman won’t like this,” Luca chimed in, crossing his arms over his wide chest.
“I’ll deal with him,” Nico replied, his expression drawn with distress.
Luca pinched the bridge of his nose. “I’ll never hear the end of it from him,” he muttered to himself.
I caressed his arm soothingly. When Roman finds out, I’d no doubt that they’d be at each other’s throats.
“I’ll be here whether you want to pursue this path or not, Nico.” I gave him a small smile to reassure him that he was stuck with me.
His dimples appeared as he returned me a smile and I knew after all this chaos was settled, that we’d be fine .
“Where’s Viktor?” I stood toe to toe with my father, a vicious rage searing through me from his name alone. “If my brother is staying here, I want him dead.”
I hadn’t seen him around, but I’d no doubt he fed my father a story that would cover his ass.
“He did this to me.” I pointed at the scar on my face, the rage bubbling over. “He tortured Nicolai and was the one who shot me.” Tears threatened to release when I thought about how much he’d stripped from me. “All because of a title he was never deserving of in the first place.”
My father leaned forward and cupped my face, pain flashing in his eyes as if he felt my hurt, if not more. “And he’ll never do it again. No one will, for that matter.” He wiped a fallen tear from my cheek with his thumb. “He’s also floating somewhere in the Moskva.”
What? “He’s dead?”
“Did you think I’d let him live after what he did to you?” he asked, anger lining his forehead.
My pulse raced, cold sweat running down my neck. “How did you figure it out?”
“After the bullet was extracted from your chest, I asked to see it.”
Realization dawned on me. The bullet was Viktor’s, which meant it had the same symbol as my own gun had.
Had he been so careless, blinded by his revenge that he didn’t realize he’d set himself up or had he assumed my father would never question his loyalty.
“I’d taken my time drawing out his pain until he begged for death,” my father continued, a crease forming between his brows. “As my nephew, I’d trusted him blindly and I shouldn’t have.”
“At first, I thought it was quite stupid to give engraved bullets to specific people in the Bratva, but I stand corrected,” Luca inserted his opinion per usual, and I could tell it irritated my father with the way his demeanor changed.
“What’s this motherfucker talking about, Irina?”
“Nothing, Papa. ” I definitely wouldn’t tell him I had lacked all judgment whenever the brute next to me was near and had figured out who I was before anyone else did.
“Is this where you apologize for shooting me falsely, dear father-in-law ?” Luca kept riling him up, his voice full of arrogance.
My father’s face became red, and I knew he was a second away from lunging at him, but I was frozen in place.
Father-in-law.
My heart fluttered in my chest, and I felt myself growing faint. Luca wanted to marry me?
“I should’ve shot you in the head instead,” he spat out. “And don’t call me that.”
“What? Father-in-law?” His grin was wide, and it was so infectious, I couldn’t help but reflect it. “Doesn’t it have a nice ring to it, though? Sort of like the one I’ll be putting on your daughter’s finger.”
Before I had a chance to react, my father was on him, his hand wrapped around his throat. “Not unless I kill you.”
Luca barked out a laugh, not fighting back. “You tried that already.”
Nicolai grabbed our father before he followed through with his threat, pulling him back with a force I didn’t think he was capable of.
Luca shifted his gaze to me with a longing that made my heart nearly give out. “I’m not joking, sweetheart. I will marry you.”
He wasn’t asking me; he was telling me, and his possessive side drove me insane. Heat warmed my face and for the first time ever, I was lost for words.
“Great, you’ve traumatized my daughter with your unsolicited confession. She can’t even speak!”
“No,” I breathed, holding Luca’s stare, knowing exactly who and what I wanted. “He hasn’t.” Tears clung to my eyelids as a thick emotion cascaded over me. “He saved me.”
The truth would’ve brought me to my knees if it wasn’t for my father, who had firmly grasped my elbow, stealing my attention.
“All I’ve ever wanted was to protect you,” he said, his voice sounding distant—almost haunted. “But I see now how I’ve suffocated you in the process. I should’ve never gotten you involved in this world, either.” He pulled me to his chest, wrapping his arms around me. “I’m sorry, Printsessa . For everything.”
I sighed against him, letting him carry the weight of my hurt for once. He’d loved me in the only way he knew how. Even though he’d been too blind to see how his actions took a toll on me, a part of me couldn’t fault him for it. I still loved him.
“I forgive you,” I whispered.
He squeezed me tightly as if he was afraid to let me go before he spoke over my head, his words directed at Luca. “ You made it evidently clear that you love my daughter that night but if you make me regret letting her go, I’ll personally slice your limbs and feed it to my hounds.”
“By the hands of the Pakhan himself? What a true honor,” Luca snidely replied as he pulled me to him by the back pocket of my jeans until I was facing him. “Besides, love is too vague of a word for what I feel for her.”
He smiled down at me, his eyes crinkling at the corners, and I knew with everything that I was, I’d never regret him.
I’d found Nicolai alone in one of the studies a few days later. He was standing in front of the window, peering down at the guards littered across the front lawn.
I leaned against the door, clicking it shut before striding toward my little brother.
“Nico.”
He didn’t turn around, merely hummed in response as if he wasn’t surprised by my presence.
“Can you look at me?”
With his hands clasped behind his back, he angled his head at me.
I searched his brown eyes, the light in them nearly gone. “Why are you doing this?”
“This?” He quirked a brow.
“Why are you staying in Russia? And don’t give me that bullshit excuse of not being able to escape your fate.”
He looked back out the window as silence stretched in the taut air .
“I ran into our father that night he attacked the Mancini manor.” My ears rung as that night resurfaced in my mind. “I plead with him, Irina, for him to stop his soldiers.” His voice carried a dark edge, a bite in his tone. “We were outnumbered, and I couldn’t lose. . . ” He stopped and cleared his throat. “He agreed.”
The room swayed beneath my feet as his words echoed against the walls. “At what cost?” I asked hoarsely, but I’d already known the answer.
“Take his place as the Pakhan .”
“No. . . ” I shook my head, moving to stand in front of him. “No, you don’t have to.”
“Yes, I do.” His face was drawn, exhaustion lining his features. “I want this.”
“We both know this isn’t what you want.” I held my hands to my chest, feeling the weight of this burden he’d taken upon himself. “Don’t sacrifice your happiness.”
“I’m a man of my word, Irina. I’ll survive just fine.”
“Surviving doesn’t mean living.”
He stared at me for a long moment as if my words were true beyond this conversation.
“What about everyone back home?” I asked, a feeling of loss washing over me. He’d be here, and I’d be in Italy.
“I’ll visit.”
His words were sharp and blunt, but I knew him better than that. I knew it was killing him inside. He’d given up his life to save us that night and now he would be paying for it.
“I’m talking to our father.” If he wouldn’t put an end to this, then I would. How could they both have lied to my face ?
“You will not!” Anger marred his features, the intensity of his gaze prominent beneath his glasses. “I’m serious, Irina.”
“ Why are you so hellbent on taking this role?”
“Isn’t this what you wanted?” he asked exasperated. I wanted to scream at him for acting so callous. “Wasn’t this the plan all along?”
“I was wrong!” My body shook from frustration because I knew this was a losing battle.
“I’ve made a decision, and I won’t be changing it.”
“Nicolai. . . ” My voice broke and before I had a chance to say anything else, he wrapped his arms around me, reassuring me with his touch that he’d be okay. It all felt wrong. “You don’t owe him anything.”
“No, but he owes me.” He pressed a kiss to my temple. “Don’t be mad at your father. This is between him and me.”
I let out a shaky breath, feeling his shirt dampen beneath my cheek from my tears. “This isn’t goodbye.”
“Never.”
It made sense why Roman had said everyone had a soft spot for Nico.
Leaving Russia was bittersweet.
I hadn’t listened to Nicolai and naturally blew up on my father until Luca pulled me away.
Of course, he had nothing to say, reassuring me that my brother would be safe but that’s not what I was worried about .
The argument had escalated until Nicolai intervened, disappointment wrinkling his forehead as he stared at me.
It had taken another few days to relieve the tension, and I was torn and resigned. There was nothing I could do.
On my last day in Russia, my father was done giving me space and barged into my room, refusing to let me leave until we had made amends. He swore that he wouldn’t let anything or anyone harm Nico while I was gone. And I chose to believe that because whether I liked it or not, I knew I could trust him in that regard.
After all, Nicolai would be the next Pakhan of the Bratva.
And now Luca and I were back in Italy, our first stop to the Mancini household.
Roman had opened the door for us, his murderous gaze settling on Luca immediately before grasping him by the neck and forcing him into a room.
I guess Nico shared the news with him sooner than I expected.
Walking past the foyer and down the hall, I’d reached the living room.
There was a sort of melancholy being back here and after all that happened, I couldn’t quite pinpoint it.
I stopped near the entrance, almost afraid to see my best friend. The last time I’d seen her, she was in early labor.
“Are you done hogging my nephew?” Enzo’s voice drifted toward me, and I peered around the corner to see him take the baby from a scowling Evangeline.
“It wouldn’t kill you to ask nicely,” she replied back before taking a seat on the couch .
“It might.”
Enzo was as bitter as ever and it could only mean one thing, Sofia was still in rehab.
“Irina. . . ”
My head snapped to the right, heart dropping when my gaze landed on Aurora, her mouth parted in shock.
A whimper fell from my lips as I rushed toward her, her cinnamon scent relieving me of all the heartache as I hugged her tightly.
“You left without telling me,” she whispered against my neck, her voice cracking.
Confusion set in at her accusation.
Unless no one had told her what really happened to me that night. It made sense if they didn’t. Relief flooded through me, and I smiled to myself. The last thing I wanted was to stress her out more than I already had.
“I’ll never do it again.” I pulled back and caught her green eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“Good because I really want you to meet Aro.” She half sobbed, half laughed as she grabbed my hand and led us inside the room.
“Oh God, Irina.” Eva clung to me as if my absence had jarred her. “I’m so glad you’re alive,” she said to my ears alone.
“Thanks to your brother,” I replied. Even if that bullet had taken my life, I’d felt more alive with Luca than I ever did before him.
She peeled away from me; her expression filled with sympathy I didn’t deserve.
“Survived death once again I see,” Enzo said with a hint of amusement .
I nervously looked at Aurora, hoping she wouldn’t decipher the meaning behind her brother’s words before Roman walked in my direction with Luca in tow. “Don’t be dramatic, Enzo,” Roman chided before reaching me. He leaned forward and placed a kiss atop my head. “Welcome home, Irina.”
Instant affection flooded my chest. I’d been seeking for the love of a family all along when it already surrounded me, and it was all I needed.
“And don’t speak of death near my child.” Roman took little Aro into his arms and stared down at him with the same devotion that he’d only ever shown to one other person. His wife.
“Not your turn, husband.” Aurora swept in and stole their son from his embrace, and her voice rose a few octaves as she said, “You ready to meet Auntie Irina?”
I hadn’t even held the little one yet and the urge to cry was extreme. What the hell was wrong with me?
Aro was fast asleep as his mother passed him to me. I stared in awe at the bundle of joy whose nose was as cute as a button and had more hair than a newborn should, black waves covering his head.
I pressed a kiss to his forehead. “You’re beautiful.”
Large hands settled on my hips before Luca leaned down until his lips grazed my ear. “I can’t wait to make you the mother of my children.”
Flutters took flight in my stomach. “How about that ring first?” I teased.