Chapter 30
No one helps me up.
It takes a few seconds before I push onto my knees and sit back while Devon and Stevie, now maskless, stare down at me, clearly confused about what to do. Behind them stand the others in a circle.
“What the fuck was that?” Devon asks, gesturing toward the trees.
I lurch up onto a throbbing knee and look around.
The accused man is gone. “Where’s the person I saved?”
“He returned home. Like I said,” Devon says. Good.
The Keeper kneels on the ground, eyeing the circle of masked people.
“Uncuff her,” I demand. “Let her go.”
Stevie huffs and gestures to a pair of Extinguishers who must’ve arrived at some point. I recognize Lieutenant Dire from my first day of cadet training. He leans down and unlocks her ankles and then uses her wrist restraints to pull her to her feet.
“She gets to leave the city now?” I ask, my voice shaky, suddenly reminded of the itching spreading through my arms and legs. “That was the deal.”
Dire rounds on me and pins me with a dark look, his gaze scanning me from head to toe. I swallow thickly, resisting the urge to scratch. The last thing I need is any more of his attention.
“Yes,” Stevie says, answering for him. “Get her out of here.”
The Extinguishers drag the woman away as I watch her back, hoping she finds a better life beyond the city’s borders. That’s probably wishful thinking, though. Still, maybe at least this gives her a fighting chance.
Now all the attention returns to me as I force myself to my feet. I don’t know what I did, but my knee hurts and my ankle throbs and I can feel my hair sticking to my forehead. I try to clear the strands away, but my fingers come away coated in blood.
I think I’m mostly fine. Physically, anyway.
I wipe the blood on my pants and wait for my sentencing.
Devon shakes his head and runs a hand through his hair.
“What the fuck do we do now?” he asks Stevie.
“I don’t know. Kick her out?”
I make a sound of protest that has them both turning my way.
“Have something to say?” Stevie asks.
“You said I’d only be kicked out if I didn’t save them.”
“Yes, but then you saved them both!” Devon says, throwing up his hands.
“Sorry?” I say, though obviously, I’m not sorry. How could they ask me to make this choice?
Devon huffs out a sound of frustration and paces away, again tugging on his hair.
“Let’s go inside,” Stevie says. “We can talk this over.”
“You’ve entered cadet training?” Devon asks me, and I blink.
“Yes.”
“And you know that if we kick you out of Society, you can no longer train?”
“Yes.” I swallow my pride and my dignity. “Please. I want to be a Breaker more than anything.”
Something imperceptibly softens in her expression before she gestures to everyone around the circle. “Let’s go.”
Devon and Stevie take up the front of the line, and I limp behind them, surrounded by my group of masked escorts. Someone moves in beside me, revealing my cousin Anan.
“What were you thinking?” he asks in a furious whisper.
“Can we not?” I really don’t want to discuss this with him or anyone. No one can convince me I did the wrong thing tonight.
He shakes his head, and we continue in silence, returning to the school and turning a corner. Then we climb several flights of stairs. My knee throbs during the entire climb before we level off at a wide marbled hall.
Several mirrors hang down its length, and a domed ceiling curves overhead, painted with blue skies and white clouds.
A door stands at the end, and we approach it before Devon and Stevie stop. “Wait here,” Devon says to me, and then everyone disappears inside before they close it behind them, leaving me alone on the other side.
I don’t know what to expect. What will they do with me now?
A few students pass, tossing me curious looks as I sink onto a marble bench near the door. It’s then that I remember I have blood on my face, and I stand up again, approaching a mirror.
I’m a mess. I look around for a bathroom, but I need to be here when Devon and Stevie come for me. I think I’ve caused enough trouble for one night.
I give up and return to the bench, favoring my sore knee. My ankle feels a bit better, at least. With my elbows planted on my thighs, I drop my head in my hands and wait. Ten minutes pass, then fifteen. The itching from the storm eases as it moves off, and I sit back in relief.
Another half an hour later, and I’m getting restless.
My phone dings, so I pull it out. It’s Trinity, and she’s looking for me. I text her my location, then go back to waiting, staring at the door, my hands, and finally the floor.
“Poe!” Trinity calls from the end of the hall. She’s out of breath, her cheeks flushed, a cut marring her eyebrow. “I’ve been looking for you for hours!”
“What happened?” I ask as she drops onto the seat next to me. “You’re hurt.”
She swallows hard and shakes her head, still trying to catch her breath. “I took my third test this afternoon.”
She’s smiling, seems okay. My heart lifts with hope. “And?”
She breaks into a grin. “I passed.”
“Trin!” I shout, throwing my arms around her. “I’m so happy to hear that.”
“Thank you,” she says.
“But didn’t you have to finish two more?”
She nods. “I completed the second test a few days ago. I didn’t want to say anything until I had good news.”
“Well, that’s great. Congratulations,” I say.
“But there’s something you should know.” She pulls away, her expression serious. “I didn’t take House Fiama’s tests.”
I shake my head. “What?”
“I tested for House Aria.”
“I’m not following.”
She exhales a sigh and twists her fingers. “I thought it was hopeless,” she says. “But I got friendly with some students from Aria. They offered me a deal to pledge to their House instead.”
I shake my head again. “I’m still not following.”
“I’m becoming an Extinguisher,” she says proudly. “They’re seeking recruits and said they’d help me pass my tests if I agreed to sign up.”
“An Extinguisher?” I say, my voice hollow. “But . . . why?”
“Fiama was done with me, Poe. Devon told me I had almost no chance.” Her eyes fill with tears. “I had to do it.”
“But your family will still disown you!”
“I know, but it’s still better than the alternative,” she says. “At least I’m still Society.”
“Yes, but you’ll be . . .” I can’t even bring myself to say it. My best friend wants to join the monsters who hunt down and kill people.
People like me.
“What’s the problem?” she asks. “I fixed this! We can both join Aria together. It’s perfect!”
I sit back. “Trin, I’m not joining Aria. What makes you think that?”
“Your first test . . .” she says. “You tested for House Aria!”
“I know, but that was a mistake. I have to join Fiama. You know that.”
Some of her enthusiasm wanes when she realizes I’m serious.
“Trin, you didn’t really think—”
“What happened to you?” comes another voice. It’s Knox. His eyes widen as they scan me up and down.
“I had my second test,” I answer. I make eye contact with Trinity, who’s possibly just noticing the blood even though I’m pretty sure it’s hard to miss.
Knox steps closer, hovering over me. “What happened?”
I sit up and lean against the wall. “You know I can’t talk about it.”
He wouldn’t understand why I did it anyway.
“Poet, did you pass House Fiama’s test?”
I sense Trinity waiting for my answer, too.
She really thought she’d figured out a perfect solution to her problems.
I’ve never been so grateful that we aren’t supposed to disclose what happens during our initiations.
When I refuse to answer, Knox sits down on my other side. “Poet, we’ll be married in a few years; you can tell me. I’ll find out soon enough anyway.”
I sigh and pinch the bridge of my nose, which makes the cut across my forehead ache.
“Wait, what are you doing out here if you just did your test?” he asks next.
Now his expression turns to suspicion as he puts two and two together.
I press my mouth together. “Waiting for Devon and Stevie.”
“Why?”
My gaze shifts away, and I’m sure I couldn’t look guiltier if I tried. Knox grabs my chin and directs my face toward him.
“What are they doing?” he demands. “Why are you waiting for them?”
I wrench my face from his hold. “No reason.”
“Poet . . .”
“They had to discuss my results.”
The words slip out, and I regret them the instant they’re out of my mouth.
Knox’s eyes flash, and he snarls, “For fuck’s sake, what happened—”
The door to the room opens, rescuing me from his questioning. Several people file out, their masks clutched in their hands.
“They’ll see you now,” Anan says. I can’t tell from his tone how much trouble I’m in. Regardless, I leap up, grateful for the chance to dodge Knox and Trinity.
I don’t look back, sliding past Anan and entering the room.
Devon and Stevie stand in the center of a salon decorated entirely in emerald and gold.
“Close the door,” Devon says, and I turn around to do as he says, then stare at the floor before I will myself to face them again.
“Approach,” Devon says, and I clutch my hands as I take a few careful steps across the plush rug with my heart pounding in my temples.
“You really made this hard for us tonight,” Devon says.
I don’t reply. I don’t think he’s expecting me to.
“But we’ve discussed it with Chancellor Marks and General Sol.”
He glances at Stevie, and she continues. “Your test concludes with this—what do you choose, Poet Graves: House Fiama, the House of your heritage, the House run by your father, or House Aria, the House you were never intended for?”
I blink, caught completely off guard.
Despite their assurances that it’s my choice, I wasn’t really expecting anyone to ask me what I wanted.
“You’re letting me choose? I’m not being kicked out?”
Devon sighs and shakes his head. “Apparently. Those are our orders. Your brother was a good guy, and he spoke so highly of you. I’m not sure why you’re doing this, but I also know you aren’t reckless, and you might have your . . . reasons.”
His gaze flicks to the doorway, where I presume Knox is still waiting, and I wonder if he understands.
“Plus, the general doesn’t want to prevent you from joining the Storm Guard,” he says. “Technically, you did what we asked—we never said you couldn’t save them both.”
“Truthfully, we never thought anyone would do that,” Stevie says, scanning me from head to toe with what might be a touch of admiration.
I inhale a deep breath.
They’re letting me choose.
I can’t decide if this is a gift or a minefield because, whatever my choice, I can’t blame anyone but myself.
A lot of things cycle through my thoughts.
My father and his warnings, first and foremost. Of how he threatened me in Dean Withers’s office.
He could lose everything if I do this.
If I don’t pledge to Fiama, Knox will marry Winter Jenkins instead.
I understand he meant it as a threat, but presented with this choice, it becomes a lifeline. A chance to escape.
Winter wants him.
For whatever reason.
And my father’s ambitions have never been my responsibility.
Maybe if he’d asked me even once. Maybe if he’d cared at all about what I wanted.
He’s always claimed he’s the only man for the job as Fiama’s scion. The only one who has the stomach to do what it takes to keep us protected. But I’ve seen what he’s truly capable of now, and maybe Fiama would actually be better off in someone else’s hands.
I think of Trinity, my best friend who’s defended me and protected me for so long. She’s been with me through everything. I think of the look on her face just now when she thought she’d figured out a possible future where she could be happy despite her mistakes.
She really thought we’d switch Houses together.
And maybe it’s my turn to protect her for a change.
I think of Knox sitting outside, believing he has a right to know everything about me, and how I had to negotiate with him to remain in cadet training, like a prisoner.
He wants to control me and every aspect of my life.
My entire existence will become a series of compromises for my freedom. I’ve always understood that I’d move from the crush of my father’s hand to becoming another man’s property. A few weeks ago, I thought there was no avoiding it.
But a door to freedom has just cracked open, allowing in a sliver of light.
And I think about how cadet training makes me feel alive. Like I’m a part of something, and how, for once, I made a choice solely for me.
I can’t let them take all of that away.
If I become Mrs. Knox Arden in three years, that’s all I’ll ever be.
My eyes meet Devon’s, and they widen ever so slightly.
He doesn’t understand it completely, but he understands something.
I look at Stevie, and she watches me with her head tipped, her expression brimming with curiosity, like I’m an animal tethered to a pole and she can’t tell what I’ll do next.
She also doesn’t get it, but maybe someday she will.
“House Aria,” I say, lifting my chin.
Those two damning words ring between us, cementing my destiny . . . and probably my demise.