Chapter Five
Lisa felt a little tired today. She had been able to eat herself out of house and home, and now she had to go shopping. She was starving, and seeing as she hadn’t eaten, she felt so tired. It had been a long time since she felt this achy and tired.
She should have gone grocery shopping last night, but after work her feet had hurt, and all she wanted to do was curl up on the sofa and spend the night not thinking about Shadow. Why did he have to be so damn perfect and such an asshole at the same time? Life was not fair.
“Are you okay?” Adele asked, not for the first time.
“I’m good. I’m totally good.” She tried to stifle a yawn.
“Okay, that’s good.” Adele put a hand on her arm, and she smiled.
Even smiling zapped her of energy.
Lunchtime would be happening soon, and then everything would be okay. They had a lull about thirty minutes before, and she left Adele behind the counter and tried to wake herself up by gathering used cups and saucers. They had a few little sweet treats and savory snacks for people to enjoy.
They were not the best bakery, as that was just down the street. Lisa knew if the other woman decided to do coffee as well, this shop was done for. Not that she saw the boss much anymore.
The coffee shop was owned by one of the Alphas, Lisa didn’t know which one, as she had been interviewed by one of the pack members.
She gathered up the cups, and as she stood, she felt herself get a little lightheaded. For a second, she stopped, closed her eyes, and tried to gain focus. The door to the shop opened, she lifted her eyelids, and there was Shadow.
The man still drove her crazy, and he was such an asshole. That dizziness took over, and she didn’t have much time to react, until she felt like she was floating. There was a wave of sickness, and she was pretty sure someone screamed her name.
Lisa expected to hit the floor, and to feel it hurt. Only the floor never came, and then she had to wonder if she’d been struck by a sudden bolt of lightning, because the scent was amazing. Woodsy and masculine, a scent that had often made her feel much better.
“Lisa, come back to me,” Shadow said.
That voice. His voice, filled with concern, and not the horrible nasty jibes and smugness she had heard talking to a bunch of wolves. This was the voice she had come to love … the man she’d come to love.
“Is she okay? She’s been acting strange all day,” Adele said.
There was no way she was in Heaven. As she opened her eyes, she saw Adele standing over her, as well as Pam, and then there was Shadow, only she was in his arms. She tried to scramble out of them, but Shadow was much stronger than her, so he allowed her up and let her go when he was good and ready. She knew he did that, but she didn’t say anything.
“What the hell happened?” Adele asked.
“It’s nothing. I just … I haven’t eaten since last night, and then I was running late, so I couldn’t get any food, and then with the rush and everything. It’s nothing. Trust me. I’m fine.” She felt her cheeks starting to heat, and she didn’t want Shadow to think it was because she was happy to have been in his arms, because it wasn’t. She didn’t want to be in his arms. She didn’t want to be anywhere near him.
But it felt so good, and I didn’t want him to stop holding me. He has the best hands. He has the best everything.
No, this is not what she wanted to be thinking about. She needed to remember all the bad stuff she heard him say, and knowing they were never going to be together. Her love, to him, was pointless. That was the kind of stuff she needed to remember.
“You’ve not eaten?” Pam asked.
“It’s fine.” She knew she had to forgive Pam. She was being stupid with how she was treating her friend. Moving toward Pam, she pulled the other woman in for a hug. “I’m fine. I’ll eat at lunchtime, and until then, I’ll take it easy.”
“Not good enough. You’re coming with me,” Shadow said, and he reached for her arm.
Not having any food had really started to affect her reflexes as she wasn’t able to push him away so well.
“I don’t think so, Mister!” Lisa said.
“Lisa,” Adele said. “You just nearly fainted and I watched you fall. He stopped you from hitting your head on at least two tables. I think it would be good for you if you went with him and got food now.”
“It’s not normal to pass out like this,” Pam said.
“Come on. Pam’s got something to do, and Adele, you can manage the shop, right?”
“Yeah, of course.”
“I’ll help,” Pam said, reaching for her apron.
Lisa attempted to protest but it was a feeble attempt as within a few seconds, Pam already had the apron off Lisa and was wearing it. “I’m ready and raring to go.”
“Okay,” Lisa said. “I’ll go and get some food and then I’ll be back to finish my shift.”
She noticed that Pam shared a look with Shadow. It wasn’t a look she could read. She frowned but Shadow was already moving her out of the shop. Glancing one last time at Adele, her friend gave her a little wave and held both thumbs up in encouragement.
She didn’t feel any such thing. Being alone with Shadow didn’t exactly give her a thrill ride.
“We can just walk to the diner,” Lisa said.
“Get in,” Shadow said.
It was rare for her to get in his truck. They rarely went places they couldn’t walk to. Again, she wanted to protest, but she was not one to make scenes, and if she didn’t get in and do as she was told, she would be causing trouble.
Still, she wanted to tell him no, but instead she climbed into the passenger side of his truck. The truck that smelled so good. While he went around his vehicle, she took a brief second to just close her eyes and bask in the scent that was his, that filled the car. Shadow had the nicest of all scents. He smelled amazing.
She opened her eyes as he climbed into the truck beside her.
“I don’t know why we can’t walk. The diner is right there.”
He started his truck without saying a word, and she knew he was just being stubborn. Shadow always had to get his own way. There was going to come a time when he wasn’t going to get any such thing.
Shadow pulled out of the parking lot of the coffee shop, and she watched as he drove straight past the diner.
“You’ve missed it. Shadow, what the hell? I thought you were taking me to get something to eat, and I’ve got to get back to work. I’ve got a shift to finish.”
“Pam will finish your shift for you.”
“Ugh, that is not how this works. For me to get paid, I must be there.”
“I know how it works, and trust me, Pam knows what she is doing.”
Lisa frowned. “Are you the Alpha that owns the coffee shop?”
“Fuck, no, I can’t stand coffee.”
“You can’t stand coffee.” This made her frown deepen. “You’re always asking for coffee.”
“Yeah, and I don’t like it, but I have a feeling the plants outside of your place do. They’re thriving.”
“You dump the coffee in the bushes?” she asked.
“Yep. I told you, I don’t drink that stuff.”
“And what about when you seemed to be sticking around drinking coffee and waiting for me? How do you explain that?” she asked.
“Simple, when you were busy or didn’t look at me, I offered someone a free coffee. I don’t know if you know this or not, but people love free stuff. Even coffee.”
She growled in frustration. “You’re not funny.”
“I’m pretty funny.”
“I thought you loved coffee,” she said. “What else do I not know about you?”
“You know everything else, but I can’t stand coffee. There, you now know everything.”
“How are you doing with your real mate?” Lisa asked. “You know, the one you’re going to settle down with?”
It hurt. She wanted to rub at her chest where the bolt of pain seemed to strike her, but she didn’t make a move.
“I don’t have a mate, Lisa.”
Lisa glanced around them, but he was taking her in a direction she didn’t know. She also saw the sign that said they were leaving No Wolves Road.
“Shadow, what are you doing? I don’t want to leave town.”
“It’s fine.”
“No, it’s not fine. I don’t know where you’re taking me, but I believe this is some kind of kidnapping and I don’t take kindly to this. I’m not even joking.”
“Ah, so it is funny, and you’ve been joking all this other time?” he asked.
“Come on, this is not funny.”
“I’m taking you to my house,” Shadow said.
“Why?”
“The only reason you would have skipped breakfast is if you hadn’t had a chance to go to the store. Now, once I feed you at my place, we’ll go to the store and pick up a whole bunch of groceries for you, but you’re not in any state to be taking care of yourself.”
“I don’t need your help.”
“Yeah, you do, and you’ve got to stop being so stubborn about it.”
“Do you have any idea what this is like?” Lisa asked. “Being near you? This isn’t fair.”
“Life isn’t fair.”
****
He’d never been a smooth talker. It hadn’t been something he had to worry about learning. Being the Alpha meant people came to him with problems and he just had to fix them. Shadow didn’t have to employ tact or deal with his own fuckups, as he rarely made them. Until Lisa.
Now, he didn’t know what to say or do to make it right between the two of them. Even Friday night, while she had been dancing, he’d stood at the edge of the dance floor and just watched her. She’d looked so beautiful in her black dress. Lisa was all woman, her body everything. He missed her.
Shadow knew he missed her, not just because the sex had been incredible, but because he missed everything about her. Her smile, her laugh, even that sexy little snort when he said something that took her by surprise, and then once she did it, she’d go right on and do it again and again. She always sounded so cute, so pretty, and he adored her.
There was also a high chance she was pregnant. Pam had told him to be tactful, to be nice and calm, to reassure her, but he didn’t have the first clue how he was going to tell her she might be carrying his child.
Arriving at his home, he saw her curiosity as she leaned forward to glance through the window, looking at his property. In all the time they’d been dating, he’d been able to avoid bringing her back to his home. He didn’t even know why it had been important to him not to bring her.
Climbing out of his truck, he rounded the vehicle and opened her door.
“I don’t think I should be here,” she said.
“You’re here, and stop being a crybaby. Come on, I’m going to feed you, and there’s nothing to it.” Also, I’ve got to tell you that we made a baby. You’re pregnant with my child, and you’re going to give birth to the next-in-line heir to the pack.
Pam told him he would find the right way to tell her, but so far he was drawing a blank. He held onto Lisa, helping her out of his truck, and he didn’t want to let her go. There was that scent of vanilla and chocolate. Such an addictive smell. One he missed, and the reason he went by her house so often, as well as the coffee shop.
Also, the sweater he’d kept of hers inside his home had lost her scent. He had no choice but to wash it, and he was going to use it as an excuse to find some way to interact with her.
He missed her, there was no escaping that. Shadow knew he could pretend it was because he didn’t get to end things when he was good and ready, but that was a lie. No one would ever be able to replace Lisa. She was a one-of-a-kind woman.
He didn’t need Pam reminding him that he was an asshole. Shadow knew he had been a complete and total asshole. Lisa had been more than just fun. From the moment he saw her, he’d known what he wanted, at the time he just hadn’t seen forever, but now with this baby, there might be a chance.
“You have a lovely home,” she said.
“You haven’t seen the inside yet. You might hate it,” he said.
“Nah, I don’t think I could hate it. It looks beautiful,” she said, and tilted her head back to look at it. “You have a beautiful home and I know you can’t really stand a mess, so I figure the inside is going to be just as beautiful.”
That was his little secret. One Lisa had figured out when she caught him folding laundry and tidying up the mess they’d made. He had a pet peeve about crusty food on leftover plates and dishes. Lisa had teased him, saying if he wasn’t careful, she would have to lock him up in her house and throw away the key. He remembered laughing but also figuring with a naked Lisa, that wasn’t such a bad idea. He wouldn’t mind being locked away with her every day of the week.
Taking her hand, he walked up to the small garden that did have quite a few flowers growing. He didn’t want Lisa to feel too bad. She had complained that she didn’t seem to have what it took to create a beautiful garden. He always planned to plant some beautiful, colorful flowers for her to enjoy, but he’d never gotten around to it.
“It figures,” Lisa said.
Shadow laughed.
“You already know what figures, huh?” she asked.
“My flowers. My garden. Don’t forget, I am at one with nature. The full moon makes sure of that.”
She laughed. “Do you like turning into a wolf?”
Shadow stopped as he opened the door to his home and turned to look at her. In the six months they’d been dating, she had never once asked him if he actually liked it.
“Yeah, I do. The first time sucks, but then it sucks for everyone. Your body has to go through so many changes, and it is not ideal. But then, I don’t know, after a time, it all just works out, and there is no pain.”
“What’s it like? Do you feel a calling or is it like some heat, or, I don’t know, kind of like taking your clothes off?” She wrinkled her nose. “You don’t, like, remove your skin, do you, with a zip and slide it right off?”
Shadow laughed. “That sounds pretty freaky, but I assure you, no, it is nothing like that.”
He helped her into his home.
“And this is where I live,” he said.
“It’s … amazing, just as I knew it would be.”
“I’ll give you the tour right after you eat something.”
“What is everyone’s obsession with me eating? I can eat. Trust me, I will eat a lot.”
He laughed. “We all want you to eat and be healthy.” He wanted to tell her she was pregnant, but that was not ideal.
Helping her into one of the chairs at the kitchen counter, he made sure she was fine, and she swatted his hands away. “I’m fine. Trust me, I’m fine. I’m not going to faint or pass out, or whatever I did back there. It is all good. I promise.” She gave him two thumbs up, which did nothing to make him feel better.
He stepped away from her and went immediately to the fridge. Opening the fridge, he looked at the contents, trying to figure what would be quick and easy to make.
Yesterday, he had already prepared a load of meatballs, grinding up his meat, seasoning it, and part-cooking them, so they would be ready for his freezer. They were still cooling in the fridge.
Going to see Lisa took priority, and he was thankful Pam nor any of his pack had stolen his meatballs.
He grabbed a tray, along with a jar of tomato sauce, and knew he would have dinner on the table in less than twenty minutes.
Shadow put a pot of water on to boil, and as he worked, he was very much aware of Lisa’s gaze on him, and he wasn’t about to complain about it. He wanted her eyes on him.
“So, uh, do you want to tell me how you’ve been feeling?” he asked.
“I’ve been fine.”
“Pam happened to mention that you’ve been hungry a lot lately.”
“It’s nothing. I put it down to me … you know, eating my feelings.” She tried not to wince.
“You don’t think it is that?”
“I don’t know what it is, to be honest.” She took a deep breath. “But it’s fine.”
“And you’re eating beef.”
“It seems Pam talks about me a lot more than I thought, huh?”
Shadow finished putting sauce, some herbs and spices, and then the meatballs into the pot, bringing it back to boil.
“She cares,” he said.
“And I care about her. What is this about, Shadow?”
He took a deep breath. “We didn’t use any protection,” he said.
“Yeah, and it doesn’t matter, right? You’re a wolf and you can only get your mate pregnant. Your mate can only be a wolf, and you have to feel this connecti—” Lisa stopped. “What are you not saying?”
“You’re pregnant, Lisa. The cravings, the food, even the dizziness. You’re carrying my child.”