Chapter Six
Lisa didn’t think it was a good idea for her to get up, but she wanted to. She wanted to get up, go to the front door, and leave.
There was no chance she was pregnant.
But, they didn’t use any kind of protection, not anytime they were together. She didn’t think it was possible, and neither did Shadow. Even though she rarely talked to the other woman, she had heard through several wolves that Eloise had been pregnant. There had been a lot of rumor and gossip surrounding the couple but from what she could now see, the two were very happily married and mated. She made it a priority not to listen to gossip. Nothing good ever came from doing that.
“That can’t be possible,” Lisa said. “There is no way I can be pregnant, no way.”
“It’s true.” He ran fingers through his hair.
“I bet you hate this, don’t you?” Lisa asked, putting a hand to her stomach. She had been feeling strange lately. She had put it down to the heartbreak.
“No, I don’t.”
Lisa slid off the chair, because she couldn’t listen to this again.
“Stop,” Shadow said.
She didn’t know why she was listening to him, and tears filled her eyes as she turned toward him.
“You can’t do this alone,” he said.
“The only reason you care right now is because this is your baby. That is all. You’ve not changed your mind about me, about this. I’m still a weak human, remember. I don’t need you.”
“Damn it, Lisa, stop being so stubborn,” he said.
She had started to walk away, but he grabbed her arm, bringing her to a stop.
“You can’t do this,” he said.
“I can do whatever I like. I don’t have to stand and listen to this. I’ve got a job to get to and stuff that needs to happen.” And that dizziness suddenly hit her quite hard, and it helped Shadow as he moved her back into her chair.
“Look, I get that I fucked up, and you know what, I am sorry. I know I fucked up and I know it is going to take a lot more than apologies to make this up to you,” he said. “But, you’re pregnant. Pam’s picking up a test, and she’s bringing it back here, and then we can confirm it. After that, we can come up with some kind of plan for this to work.”
“A plan?” Lisa asked.
“You cannot do this alone.”
“I don’t need you.”
“You’ve got me, because I am the father of your baby, and whether you like it or not, I care about you.”
“So now you care about me?” She hated how her heart skipped a beat.
It wasn’t love, but he cared. Damn, treacherous heart and body. Even as she wanted to hate him, her body liked him being close.
Tears filled her eyes, and that explained the constant fluctuations of emotions that ran riot around her body with no way to stop it. Was it so wrong that at that very second, with how close he was to her, she wanted to pull him in closer, kiss his lips, and feel those hands touching her?
She had a sudden flash of his hands working up her body, holding her in place against him, as he had his wicked way with her. There had been a time when Shadow couldn’t stop touching her.
He cupped her face and forced her to look at him. “Do you understand?” he asked.
“I understand.”
“Good.” He wiped the tears from her eyes, and she didn’t fight him off.
Taking a deep breath, she tried to get herself back in check, to not feel this way, and it was almost impossible. This was insane. Crazy.
She was pregnant.
Lisa had always wanted to be a mother, to have children and a family. Admittedly, it hadn’t been like this. She had hoped to have already been with a man who loved her as much as she loved him. She did love Shadow, so very much.
She didn’t know for certain if life was just plain cruel to her right now.
“Are you okay?” he asked. “You’re not going to make some kind of run for it when I finish our food?”
“I won’t run, at least not until I have some food. I am hungry.” And the food was starting to smell very good.
Shadow gave her a smile, and then he leaned in and kissed her on the head. It was such a sweet action, that it almost brought more tears to her eyes. She didn’t know how she was able to control them, and afterward, she felt like a fucking hero. If crying was going to be part and parcel of being pregnant, she was in for a rocky few months. She hated crying.
She turned her attention back to Shadow, and waited as he tested the pasta and nodded his head. He reserved some of the cooking water before draining it.
To taste the sauce, he cut a meatball in half and took a bite, blowing on it, making her laugh as he pulled a funny face and waved his hand in front of his mouth.
“Funny,” she said.
“That wasn’t even me trying to be funny.”
He gave her a wink, and she took a deep breath. That wink shouldn’t be so sexy.
Get a grip on yourself, Lisa. This is still the man that said you were weak and was only using you for sex. You have to remember that.
Shadow served them both up two large portions of meatballs and spaghetti. It looked so good. Her mouth watered. Actually, from the moment he started cooking, she’d been doing everything she could to stop the drool from escaping her mouth. Sounded gross, was probably completely gross, but it also didn’t stop it from being true.
Shadow offered her a fork and a knife, but she knew without a doubt she wasn’t going to need any knife to get stuck in the food. It felt like she hadn’t eaten in days. She didn’t think the first meatball tasted quite right. The second one, so damn good. The pasta, cooked to perfection, and the few herbs and spices in the sauce finished this amazing dinner. So tasty.
She didn’t want to stop eating. There was a party going on inside her mouth.
“It’s good?” Shadow asked.
“Very good.”
She saw the smirk on his lips, and right now she didn’t even care.
****
Lisa was pregnant.
Pam had dropped off the pregnancy test, but Shadow didn’t need the test to know she was. Now that he’d been able to spend all afternoon with her, he had begun to smell the subtle changes of her scent.
She carried his child. There was no doubt in his mind. Lisa belonged to him.
Even his wolf was freaking joyous about this. He wanted to pull her into his arms, to rub his scent all over her body. It had been too long since he last was inside her, and his scent had already begun to fade. He wanted to make sure every wolf that came into contact with her knew who they were dealing with.
Lisa belonged to him.
She was his mate. His woman.
This changed everything.
Shadow had expected to feel disappointed but he wasn’t. Lisa was his. He should have known this was the way it was going to work out. From the moment he had met her, his need for her had taken him by surprise. That hadn’t changed, even now.
He wanted her so badly. Craved her.
“What do we do?” Lisa asked.
“What do you mean?”
“I … I’m not your mate. I’m not a wolf. I know Eloise didn’t die giving birth to her child. Will I give birth to a human? Will it be part human, part wolf? Do you want to reject me and the child? What will your pack think? I have no idea what I am saying right now. I don’t know what to do.”
Shadow went to her and took both her hands in his. Just that touch felt good to him.
“I want you to remain calm, that is important.”
“I don’t know what to do. I had a plan, and we are so far out of the spectrum of that plan, it’s not even funny. We’re not married. You don’t even love me, and I know you said you care for me, but that is now, knowing I carry your child. Before then, you were quite sure. I’m trying not to freak out, but I don’t think this is working,” she said.
Shadow cupped her cheek, and the temptation to kiss her was so strong, only he didn’t think it would help, and might perhaps freak her out more.
“I want this baby,” he said. “It will be part human and part wolf, because that is what we are. I do not know if our child will be weaker or not. We’re entering unknown territory, but that doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Eloise and Beau did it,” he said.
“You’re not mad?” she asked.
“I’m delighted. I’m going to be a father, and I couldn’t have gotten a better mother for my child. You’re going to be an amazing mother.”
“You think so?”
“I know so.”
She shook her head. “I don’t know what I’m doing. What if it is different with a wolf child? What if your pack really can’t stand her or him? What if you want a boy and you get a girl? Does that change anything?”
“Stop,” he said, gently. “All we want for certain is a healthy baby. That is it. One happy, healthy baby.”
Lisa nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.”
“And, I want you to move in here,” Shadow said. “I want you to live with me.”
She began to shake her head.
“Listen to me, Lisa. You didn’t take care of yourself. You ran out of food, and you didn’t eat. I want to take care of you.”
“No, I can take care of myself. I’m not going to stay here.”
She got to her feet, and he stood. If he needed to, he could keep her here.
“Look, this hasn’t changed anything,” she said.
“Lisa, don’t.”
“We’re two different people, and I can’t stop thinking about what you said. I know I am not the mate you wanted.”
He cupped her face and tilted her head back to look at him. “I was an asshole,” he said, finally admitting the truth.
“I didn’t know what the fuck I was saying, or what I was thinking. You cannot listen to that shit. I was wrong.” He hadn’t been anywhere near close to saying what he really felt. He wasn’t going to tell them that when he was around Lisa, the whole world faded away. He wasn’t going to tell them that she was the best thing that had ever happened to him. That he loved being with her. Shadow hadn’t told them the truth, because at the time it had terrified him. Lisa was human, he was not.
He was an Alpha, and not once while they were together did Lisa ask him about the pack, about being an Alpha, about any of this. They didn’t talk about it. He didn’t think she wanted to know. Maybe she was a little embarrassed to have given her virginity to him, to a wolf. He doubted it, but again, he didn’t know for sure. Instead, he fucking lied, because it had been easier to him than to admit the truth. Lisa owned him.
He was a fucking Alpha, and she owned his heart.
No wolf allowed themselves to be at the mercy of a human. It was unheard of.
“You can hate me all you want, and I know it doesn’t matter what I say, you’re going to think what you damn well like. It doesn’t change the fact that is my child in there. It doesn’t change the fact that I am going to take care of you, whether you like it or not. You’re staying here, and that is final.”
Lisa stared at him, and he waited for her to argue. She folded her arms, continued to look at him, and he waited.
“Fine, if that is the case, I want to … pick up some of my things from home.”
“You’re not going to argue with me?” he asked.
“What’s the point? You’ve already said it’s not going to change, and also, I rather liked your meatballs and spaghetti. It would be nice to have someone cook for me.” She nibbled her bottom lip, and he found that so sexy. He wanted to reach out, touch that lip, and maybe even nibble it between his own teeth. He refrained from doing that, and instead focused on actually doing what he was meant to do—take care of Lisa.
“You’re not working,” Shadow said.
Now this did create a cute growl.
“I don’t give a shit. I’m not always going to be there to catch you. This is me taking care of you. Adele can come and visit you here anytime she wants. Anything else in between, that is not fucking happening.”
“You’re being unreasonable.”
“No, I’m not. You’re carrying my child, the heir to this pack, and I am going to make sure you are well taken care of.” He stepped toward her, then another, until he reached out, gripped the back of her neck, and stared into her eyes. There was so much more he wanted to say to her, but he couldn’t, not today. She’d hear the words but not believe them. He had to wait until the right opportunity, when she was ready.
However, he couldn’t end this without a kiss. Shadow dropped a kiss to her lips, and he heard the soft subtle moan that escaped her mouth, and he swallowed it down.
One day, he was going to make this woman fall in love with him, and he was going to fix what he had messed up.