Chapter 28
CHAPTER
TWENTY-EIGHT
TESSA
I’m woken by soft lips pressing against mine.
“Huh?” My eyes fly open to find Linc leaning over me. He’s dressed in his tux, and his hair is disheveled. “Linc? What are you doing here?”
I’m laying in his bed, because he insisted I stay at his apartment tonight after Angela and I had dinner. He’d ordered three courses from a new restaurant in Manhattan and had it brought over with the car he sent for us.
Angela and I had pretty much spent the whole meal giggling about how sweet he is. Because nobody’s ever done something like that for me. And when she left I spent an obscene amount of time in his huge tub, playing with every jet until the muscles in my back finally eased.
“I couldn’t sleep without you,” he says. “Decided to come home and get some shut eye.”
I’m fully awake now. I take in the way his black tie is hanging around his neck, the top button of his white shirt unfastened. He’s still wearing his dress pants but he doesn’t have his suit jacket on anymore.
His shirt sleeves are rolled up, revealing tan skin and a Rolex. For a second I wonder if I’m having some kind of dream, because he looks too good to be true.
“You’re supposed to be at your brother’s wedding,” I whisper, as he pulls his tie off and starts unbuttoning his shirt. And yes, I stare at him without embarrassment as he shrugs it off, then pulls his undershirt over his head.
Dear God, I think I might combust.
“I was. Things were winding down. I decided to hop on a copter and come see my girl.”
“You took a helicopter?” My voice lifts an octave. “How much did that cost?”
“I hitched a ride with a friend of my dad’s. He lives in Manhattan.” He shrugs as though this is an every day occurrence.
Maybe it is. I’m trying not to think about that too much.
He unfastens his pants, sliding them down his hips. I can see the outline of his thigh muscles where they meet his shorts.
“Won’t your family be worried?” I ask him. “Won’t they notice that you’re not there in the morning?”
“We have a brunch planned. At eleven. And I’ll be back in time for that.”
My eyes widen. “In Virginia?”
He smiles as he pulls off his shorts. “Yep. I don’t suppose you want to join me?”
I start to laugh. “No.”
“Spoilsport.”
“Zoe will be home tomorrow afternoon,” I remind him.
He turns around and gives me the perfect view of his peachy ass as he walks into the bathroom, leaving the door open. A moment later the shower turns on, and I’m reminded of our time in Exuma. When I knew he was naked just a room away from me.
When I didn’t know how much I was going to fall for this man.
“Maybe I’ll skip brunch,” he shouts out over the noise of the shower.
“You can’t skip brunch. It’s your brother’s wedding.” I still can’t believe he’s here, standing beneath his shower like he hasn’t just traveled hundreds of miles in a helicopter to spend the night with me.
“Will Jared come in when he drops off Zoe?” Linc asks when he’s out of the shower. He has a white towel slung around his hips, and is using another to dry his face.
“He doesn’t usually. He’s always in too much of a hurry.”
Linc’s eyes catch mine. “I don’t want him upsetting you again.”
“Is that why you came back?” I ask him. “Because I was upset?”
He drops the towel he’s holding, then walks toward me, his gaze intent. “No. I came back because I’ve spent the day surrounded by the people that I love and I was miserable. I love weddings. I love parties. Or I used to. But it all felt… less… without you. Like somebody had turned the color down on life. And when my dad’s friend said he was leaving for New York all I could think about was the fact that you were here and I wasn’t. And I’d either leave with him or walk all the way home, because I want to spend the night curled around you.”
“Oh,” I say, my chest tight. “That’s beautiful.”
“Thank you.” He pulls the towel around his waist off, then lifts the covers and climbs into bed beside me. He kisses me softly again, in a way that sends my heart racing. “And if you didn’t get the message, I’m serious about you. I know we have things to sort out, not least my fucking job, but I’m all in, Tessa, no matter what anybody says. ”
“Do you mean Jared?” I ask, because I know he’s annoyed with him for what he said.
“Yeah, something like that.”
“Because you should ignore him. I am.” I cup his face. He’s freshly shaven. I can smell the pine scent of his shower gel. “By the way, I really like you, too.”
He gives me the sweetest of smiles. “Good.” He pulls me against him, and I’m overwhelmed by this man. By the way my life has changed so much.
I’m really trying not to think about the complications. Jared and work and my mid-reno home. I just want to enjoy this feeling of being in his arms.
“Tell me about the wedding,” I say, as he runs his finger down my spine. He’s already hard.
“The bride wore white. The groom messed up his lines because he’s an imbecile. My aunt Gemma got drunk like she always does and now I need you to shut up because I’m going to fuck you.”
He says them against my lips. And I start to laugh again, as he reaches between us, his fingers oh-so-soft as they slide against me.
“Jesus, you’re already wet.”
“I just saw you in a tux. Then not in a tux,” I whisper against him.
He rolls on top of me, replacing his fingers with the part of him I need the most, his lips gentle against mine as he slowly slides inside.
And when we both come, he’s cupping my face with his gentle palms, his eyes never leaving mine.
“We’re going to make this work,” he says gruffly.
It’s three weeks later, and Linc’s face is on my screen. I’m in bed and he’s in a suit, looking dangerously attractive as he scowls at the camera. It’s early in the morning his time, and I can see pale shafts of sunlight shining through the window behind him. It’s after midnight here, and I’m so sleepy my eyes are drooping.
He’s been working incredibly hard at opening the European office. He’s also managed to fly home twice, even though I know he needs to rest. The first time was when Zoe was at Jared’s and we spent the whole weekend in his bed.
The second time she was home. We haven’t told her about us being together yet, and it touched my heart how casual he kept things. He helped us with more renovations and I felt bad that he was working on my place after such a busy week and flight, but he swore it was relaxing for him.
Angela insisted on taking Zoe to dinner and a show later that night – Godmother’s rights – so we could have a couple of hours alone.
“This time difference isn’t going to work,” Linc says, his brows knitting together. “How the hell are we supposed to have phone sex when either I’m at work or you are?”
I giggle, because he really does look like he needs some release. “Can’t you just… you know…”
“What, Tessa? What should I do?”
“Touch yourself,” I whisper. “Make friends with Mr. Right.”
“Mr. Right?” He sounds almost disgusted.
“Your right hand,” I clarify and his scowl deepens.
“Why would I want my right hand when the most gorgeous woman alive is wet and waiting for me?”
“I’m not wet.”
“You would be if I was there,” he tells me.
Yes, I probably would. I’m learning that sex is Linc’s love language. It’s how he expresses himself. I can’t say I’m sad about that.
“And I can’t fucking come home this weekend,” he says. “That’s what I called to tell you. ”
Oh. I take a deep breath because we knew this was possible. He’s meeting with clients every working hour to try to hit the ground running with the European Office of Hampshire PR.
“That’s okay. I’m seeing my other boyfriend this weekend anyway,” I tell him.
He rolls his eyes at me, still not amused.
“You can call me early on Sunday morning your time,” I tell him. Which will make it after midnight here. “I’ll make sure I stay up late.”
“For what?” There’s a hint of interest in his eyes now.
“You know what for.”
“So you can help Mr. Right along?”
I grin. “A threesome? So early in our relationship.” I can still remember our talk about that. And I’m mostly okay that despite him being younger than me he’s so much more experienced. In sex anyway.
“I’m not sharing you with anybody,” he tells me. “And just so you know, when I fly home next, you need to take a few days off work because you won’t be walking.”
“Is that all you want me for? My body?” I tease.
His face turns suddenly serious. “No. I want you because you make me smile. Because I like talking to you. Because I can’t sleep unless I’m wrapped around you. Did you know I only got three hours last night?”
“No wonder you’re grumpy,” I say smiling.
“Damn right.”
I blow him a kiss and then I feel my eyes start to get heavy. “I need to get some sleep,” I tell him. “I have a meeting at eight.”
“Okay,” he says softly. “But don’t turn off the the video. I want to watch you.”
“You pervert.”
“Damn right I am. Sweet dreams, Carmichael.”
“Mom, look!” Zoe runs into the kitchen. It’s the following week and I’m cooking pasta in one pot and stirring pasta sauce in another and I’m just plain exhausted because it’s been a long day and I hate this kitchen.
That’s the problem with renovating one room at a time. When each room is done it makes the others look even more shabby. And the kitchen is going to be the biggest – and costliest – room to remodel. Even with the bonus we’re getting from winning the Exuma account, I won’t be able to afford all the supplies until next year. Not after the costs for the bathroom overran, thanks to a pipe that needed digging out and replacing.
I’m down to a few thousand dollars in my savings account and I can’t take on any more debt.
I know I’m luckier than most. We have a roof over our heads and I have a job bringing in money and things are on the up. I just wish I didn’t feel inadequate every time I walked into this room.
“What is it?” I ask her.
“Linc sent me this super cool t-shirt. It’s French.” She holds it up against her. It’s black with two manga characters on it, with their names Jeanne Et Serge , written across the front. “Isn’t it cool?”
“Linc sent you that?” They had a huge discussion about Manga the last time he was was in town. I’m touched that he remembers that.
“Yeah. A delivery man dropped it off.” Her face lights up. “I’m going to wear it this weekend to Alice’s party.”
“You’re at your dad’s this weekend,” I say. “Aren’t you?”
“Yes.” She looks at me as though I’m an idiot. “You’re the one who agreed to the custody schedule.”
“Maybe it’s best if you don’t tell him it’s from Linc,” I tell her .
As soon as the words escape my lips I feel like an asshole. Because I never want my kid to lie. And I’m annoyed at myself for being annoyed at Linc for sending it to her and making me ask her to lie.
Damn, it’s been a hard day. I can feel a headache coming on.
“Does Dad not like Linc?”
The sauce is boiling too hard. I turn the heat down. “It’s not that. It’s just…” I shake my head, totally unprepared to have this conversation. “Dad is worried about him being around you, even though he shouldn’t be.”
“Why?” She looks almost annoyed. “Melissa is around me all the time when I’m over at their house. She spends more time with me than Dad does.”
“I know.” I nod. “And it’s not anything you’ve done wrong. Or Linc for that matter. The t-shirt is fabulous. Linc is very sweet.”
“He is.” She nods. “And I’m wearing it. No matter what.”
“Of course you are. Just ignore me.” I shoot her a smile. I need to get over this. It’s just that I feel extra inadequate today. I can’t shake it off no matter how much I try.
And yes, some of it may be due to the Instagram photo Angela sent me of Linc at a party in Paris last night.
He wasn’t with a woman. Not that I thought he would be. I’m over that kind of jealousy now. But his life is so different to mine and sometimes I find myself wondering how long he’s going to stick around when he realizes just how boring it is trying to keep a roof over our heads.
“You look sad,” Zoe says.
I force a smile onto my face. “I’m not sad. Just tired. Dinner will be ready in five minutes. Why don’t you sit at the table and tell me about your day?”
I listen as she tells me about an experiment they did in science, and how they’re studying Macbeth in English class but the teacher is so superstitious they’re not allowed to say the name.
“We have to call it the Scottish Play,” she tells me as I put our bowls on the table. She picks her spoon and fork up and twirls the noodles like an expert.
“So what do you call the character Macbeth?”
“The Scottish guy.”
“Aren’t all the characters Scottish?” I ask her.
“Yeah, but we’re allowed to say their names. Then Jonah started calling his MacBook a ScottishBook and things deteriorated from there.”
Zoe spends the evening doing her homework so she doesn’t have to do it over the weekend, and I spend the time reviewing some influencer videos for the Exuma project, before sending them to Roman for his approval. And then I check the calendar and I realize with relief that I’ve been moody tonight for a reason.
My period is always so irregular that I don’t bother tracking it, but I know the ballpark of when it’s supposed to arrive. I’m smiling through my tears because at least I’m not turning into a perpetual bitch for no reason.
Linc calls at midnight my time again, while he’s getting ready for work in Paris. And when I hear his voice, like the over emotional idiot I am, I burst into tears.
“What’s wrong?” His voice echoes with alarm.
“I’m sorry. I’m just hormonal.” If this doesn’t put him off me then nothing will. “My period is due any day.”
He lets out a long breath. “Thank god. I was about to book the next flight home.”
“You’re coming home in two days anyway,” I point out, sniffling. “And you don’t need to fly back because I’m an idiot.” He’s the one who has to cope with being away from home, and all the jet lag.
“It would be a win-win.” There’s a smile in his voice. “I’d get some fucking sleep at night. ”
“I’ll give you all the sleep this weekend,” I promise him. “I’ll make you sleep so good, baby.”
He laughs and it feels so good to hear it.
“Unfortunately, we have to go out on Saturday night.”
“We do?” Well there goes my plan of not getting out of bed for two days.
“My family is in town. They want to catch up. And meet you.”
My chest tightens. “Why?” I ask, because I genuinely have no idea. I’m not rich like them. Not glamorous. Linc showed me some of the photographs from his brother’s wedding. The dresses there were more expensive than my bathroom cost. I know because Page Six said so.
And now I’m thinking about Jared’s parents, and how they never liked me. I’m pretty sure they did some kind of happy dance when they found out about our separation.
“Because they want to meet the woman who puts a smile on my face. And I want you to meet them, too.”
And now I feel worse than ever. A tear rolls down my cheek because this man knows exactly how to sweet talk.
And he is sweet. The sweetest. I miss him so much.
It’s stupid to feel such a crisis of confidence, I know that. But everything inside of me feels on edge.
It’s just the hormones, I tell myself. That’s all it is.
If Linc wants me to meet his family then I’ll do it for him.
“Okay,” I say. “I’ll do it.”
“Of course you will. And they’ll love you.”
I’m not sure they will. And isn’t that the bitch? Because I’ve fallen in love with this man. I need to tell him, but I’ll do it when saying it doesn’t make me cry.
“I miss you,” I whisper instead. But it means the same thing.
I miss you. I love you.
God, I hope his family doesn’t hate me.