16. Tori
16
TORI
How’s it going with your hot new roommates? Hailey’s text read. I’d finally come clean to her about my living situation. She’d been mad that I’d lied about having a place to stay, but she’d quickly forgiven me. If anyone could understand sharing a home with three men, it was her. Naturally, she’d looked my new roommates up online. Kyle, being on the baseball team, was the easiest to find, and she kept bringing him up. As if she didn’t have enough handsome guys in her life.
Good. Jayden just gave me a campus tour, now we’re at a little coffee shop.
A campus tour??? You’re in your second year here. You’ve been on campus just as long as he has, right?
Yes, but he knows all these cool little places. I glanced over to the counter, where he was ordering. This place was the perfect example. It was buried in the basement of the social sciences building, and I’d had no idea it was here. Before that, we walked around campus, getting in a little exercise before the study group tonight. He’d shown me a house on the edge of campus that always had cats in the front yard. A little courtyard with a fountain in it near the administrative building. And, hilariously, the base of the chemistry building where you could just make out the edge of a dropped hammer embedded in the concrete.
It had been fun, seeing the university through his eyes. Jayden was an observant guy. As we walked around, I’d had the strange urge to take his hand. Then again, maybe it wasn’t all that strange. After all, I’d practically been lying on top of him in the hammock on Sunday. That had been the most relaxed I’d felt in weeks. With Jayden’s bicep under my head, it had been as if he was holding me in his arms. I’d liked it—maybe too much. Then, when I remembered that top-notch scalp massage he’d given me, well, let’s just say he’d been on my mind a lot lately.
I’ve got to get to class , Hailey texted. Be good and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do. She followed that with a winking emoji. Given that she was living with three hotties, I wasn’t entirely sure what was entailed.
Hell, I wasn’t even sure about my own list. But I did know that the drive home with Kyle yesterday had been pretty steamy. My skin still tingled every time I thought about it. And later, when I was in bed, I could hear Kyle moving around his room just on the other side of the wall, and, well, that had led to some very happy dreams.
“Sorry that took so long.” Jayden set a tray down on the table. He’d bought sandwiches, chips, and drinks.
I smiled up at him. “You bought me dinner and you’re apologizing?”
“Not sure that this counts as dinner.” He sat down, scooting his chair close to mine. “But I like this place. It’s never crowded, mainly because no one knows about it.”
I sure hadn’t. The quiet hum of the café made it feel like a hidden world, separate from the bustle of campus. “Did they make the sandwiches fresh or something?”
“No, they’re from the display case.” He lowered his voice, leaning in. “The guy behind the counter is brand new. To the café, and by the looks of things, to planet Earth.”
I giggled and resisted the urge to look over at the poor guy.
“My friend Mia’s shift starts soon, and she’s great. Practically runs the place. I’m glad you’ll get to meet her—I think you’ll like her.”
Um… who the hell was Mia? This was the first time I’d heard the name, but she seemed like someone Jayden liked. As friends? Or something more? A dull ache hit my stomach, and I had trouble swallowing the chip I’d just eaten. I was well aware that I had no claim over the man sitting next to me, but I kind of liked spending so much time with him recently. Maybe I was hanging out so often with good-looking men that I was getting spoiled.
Still, I kind of hoped this Mia had a boyfriend.
Jayden twisted the lids off two green glass bottles. The label identified them as some sort of carbonated lemon-lime drink. I took the one he held out.
“Let’s make a toast.” His smile had me anticipating whatever he was going to say.
“To what?”
He clinked the neck of his bottle against mine. “To our success in the bathroom.” He stopped dead and then rolled his eyes, laughing at himself. “That came out so wrong that I really hope you’ll forget it.”
It took effort not to laugh, especially since I knew what he’d meant. “I didn’t hear anything, sorry. What are we drinking to again?”
He grinned and chose his words more carefully. “To successfully clearing out the downstairs bathroom and getting it ready for use.”
We clicked drinks again, and I said, “Much better.” The drink was fizzy and tickled my tongue. “I still want to buy a bathmat and a trash can and all that.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
“Yes, I do. I live there too, you know.”
For some reason, he clinked his bottle against mine for the third time and took a long swallow.
“Besides, you paid for that handheld shower thingie.” The old showerhead had corroded and was unusable.
“I’ll try to install it tomorrow. I wish we had time to paint in there.”
I did too, though with so much going on, it wasn’t a priority. It was kind of fun to see the basement transform from the world’s most overcrowded thrift store into a usable space. Though there still wasn’t a big enough area in the main room to bring in a bed for Jayden’s.
I unwrapped my sandwich and he opened the second bag of chips, setting it on the tray in front of us.
As I ate, I peeked at him out of the corner of my eye. Suddenly, I wanted to know more about him. “Tell me about your family in Florida, Uncle Jayden.” He’d mentioned something about that in our study group earlier in the semester.
He smiled, setting down his sandwich. “My brother and his wife moved there about two years ago. She’s five months along.”
“Are you close to your brother?”
“Yeah, we get along. But it’s a little harder to keep in touch now that he has a wife and a busy job.”
“Uncle Jayden… I can’t quite get used to the sound of it.”
“Tell me about it. I feel too young to be an uncle.” He grinned. “Too young and cool and good-looking.”
“Then you’ll be the cool uncle.”
He cocked an eyebrow at me. “But not young and good-looking?”
“Those too, of course.” I said it jokingly even though it was true. But it felt too direct to say that sincerely. Although maybe I could have said it to Kyle? In a weird way, that safeword he’d given me had been kind of freeing. As if I could explore some things I normally wouldn’t in a way that didn’t make me uncomfortable—because I knew there was an easy way out.
“Do you have siblings?” he asked.
“No. It was just me and my mom,” I said. At least it had been until I was twelve.
“She lives in Atlanta, right?”
“No, Macon.”
He cocked his head to the side. “That can’t be that far from Florida. If I ever get in over my head with uncle duties, I might have to call for reinforcements. Do you know anything about babies?”
“Not really. You?”
“Nope. But the internet does.”
“Thank god for that.”
He took a bite of his sandwich as he studied me. Finally, he said, “So what’s the deal with you and your mom?”
I took a bite of my own, chewing slowly before answering. “What do you mean?”
“When I asked about her, your shoulders stiffened. And you got a frown line right there.” He touched the pad of his index finger to a spot between my eyebrows.
“You’re very observant,” I said, still stalling.
He shrugged. “I feel like I’m getting to know you better, and I’m glad for that.”
“Me too.”
He smiled. “And okay, I have been observing you. You’re much more fun to look at than Lucas or Kyle.”
That was definitely a matter of opinion, and one I didn’t agree with. “You just like my hair.” That much had been obvious since the study group started last year.
He laughed, but his cheeks reddened slightly. “Okay, guilty as charged. I do like your hair. But that’s not the only thing.”
Since he didn’t elaborate, I didn’t really have anything to blush about—but I suspected I did it anyway. Truthfully, I liked his hair, too. It had some height to it, and he kept his short beard nicely trimmed. I’d never been a huge fan of beards, but his gave definition to his face. All in all, he managed to look well-put together and casual at the same time.
“So, your mom?” he prompted.
I didn’t want to answer because it wasn’t my favorite subject, but on the other hand, I liked getting closer to Jayden. Not just physically, as we had in the hammock, either. Last year, he’d been just a guy I studied with twice a week. This year, he was becoming a whole lot more. “We used to be close.”
Jayden listened intently, but I could tell he knew this was painful for me. “She was a single mother?”
“Yeah. When she got pregnant and the, um, biological father didn’t want anything to do with me.”
“He didn’t want the responsibility that comes with having a baby,” Jayden corrected. “He didn’t even get a chance to know you, which is definitely his loss.”
“Yeah. I mean, thanks. That’s how I see it, too, though sometimes I get curious about him. But that’s not the upsetting part of the story.”
“What is?”
I sighed. “When I was in middle school, my mom met someone. Doug. He was really sweet to her at first, and me, I guess, but then things got bad pretty quickly. He moved in, and everything changed. He was really controlling, and it was like my mom became a different person. She did everything he told her to. It was like she changed her entire personality for him.”
There was sympathy in Jayden’s eyes. “Was he abusive?”
“To her, yes. At least in my opinion. As for me, well, I mostly tried to stay out of his way. He saw me as competition for my mom’s attention. And he was a competitive guy.” I stopped and then corrected myself. “He is a competitive guy.”
Jayden slid his fingers around mine, squeezing. Warmth spread through my chest at the simple gesture. During our walk around campus, I’d wanted to hold his hand. But this was different. This time, I needed to.
“So he’s still in the picture?”
“Off and on. Over the years, they’ve broken up and gotten back together at least half a dozen times. Every time I think that my mom’s done with him, that she’s seen the light, then six months later they’re back together.” I blinked rapidly, not wanting to tear up.
“I’m sorry, Tori. Are they together now?”
I shook my head rather hopelessly. “I don’t know. They broke up over the summer, but when I talk to her on the phone… I get the feeling that they might be back together.” A bitter laugh escaped me. “Isn’t it pathetic that I live halfway across the state, and I can still read the signs?”
His hand was warm and steady on my own. “I would imagine that you have to learn to be observant and to quickly size up a situation when you live in a home like that.”
“Then why didn’t I see Todd for what he was sooner?” As soon as I blurted that out, I realized it had been hovering in the back of my mind for a while now.
There was nothing but sympathy in Jayden’s gaze. “You thought he was a friend, and it turned out he wasn’t. I’m sorry that happened, but it doesn’t mean you’re like your mom, Tori. Unless you’re going to go running back to Todd?”
“God, no.”
“Exactly. You trusted someone, and he didn’t live up to that trust. That speaks to what kind of person he is, not you.”
I wanted to believe his kind words, but it was hard to let myself off the hook. I still felt that I should’ve figured out that Todd wasn’t my friend sooner than I had.
“Things are headed in the right direction for you. You’re well on your way to becoming a teacher. You have a place to stay. And you have an amazingly charming roommate,” Jayden added.
“Just one?” He’d made me smile, and I was grateful for that.
“Yes. One amazingly charming roommate, and two moderately charming ones. When they aren’t at each other’s throats.”
I laughed. “I agree with your assessment.”
“Good.” He downed the last of his drink and set the bottle down on the tray. “Come on, I want you to meet Mia.”
“She’s here?”
“Yeah, her shift started a few minutes ago, but I didn’t want to interrupt you while you were talking about your mom.”
Wow. He hadn’t so much as glanced away when I was talking. Maybe I didn’t need to be jealous of this Mia after all. Wait a second. Had I really been jealous?
Maybe.
I took care of the tray and the trash. It was only fitting, since he’d bought our meal.
Then I followed him somewhat shyly up to the counter.
“Hi Jayden.” A young woman about my age gave him a friendly smile. She was pretty. Her hair was red, obviously dyed, since there were dark streaks in it, too. Wavy strands fell past her shoulders, and the overall effect was striking. Uneasily, I wondered if Jayden liked her hair as much as mine.
“Mia, this is Tori, the friend I told you about.” Wait, what had he told her? “Tori, this is Mia.” He leaned over the counter, checking the back room before telling me, “She keeps things going around here much better than her colleague.”
“You’ve got that right.” Mia turned friendly blue eyes to me. “It’s nice to meet you, Tori.”
“You too. I like this café—I didn’t even know it was here.”
“Few people do. There’s a proper lunch place up on the second floor, so usually students just grab something between classes if at all. That’s why I like it when someone comes round who will stay and talk. Especially if it’s about something other than social sciences.”
“That definition applies to both Tori and me. But we should be going… it’s study group night.”
Mia raised an eyebrow. “You know, no one else sticks with their study cohort for more than one semester.”
“What can I say? We’ve got a good group.”
I certainly agreed with that, given that I was living with two of them. “It was nice to meet you, Mia.”
“Likewise. Feel free to stop by anytime, whether Jayden’s with you or not.”
“Thank you.” My smile was genuine because hers had been.
“Told you you’d like her,” Jayden said a minute later as we walked across the quad. He checked something on his phone and then put it back in his pocket.
“Yeah, I think I did. Is she looking for a roommate?” I laughed as he raised a questioning eyebrow at me. “Just kidding! Honestly, I don’t try to move in with everyone I meet.”
“Good to know. Besides, Mia’s got a bit of an unusual living situation herself.” He gave me a sideways glance. “There seems to be a lot of that going around.”
The library wasn’t far, but when we got there, Jayden led me upstairs instead of down. “I have one more friend I want you to meet,” he said at my questioning glance.
“But we have study group soon.”
“This won’t take long.”
I followed him as he wove his way past the tables and chairs lined the wall of windows. As he approached one of the last tables, I saw a familiar face. Lucas.
He had his head down as he jotted something in a notebook. Jayden kicked the leg of the table, and he looked up. And smiled. “Hi.”
“Hi. Are you headed down to the basement?”
“In a few.”
Jayden took a step back. “I have to stop by the reference desk. I’ll see you two downstairs.”
I watched him leave, feeling like I was missing something, but I didn’t know what.
“Will you sit with me for a minute?” Lucas asked. “There's something I’d like to talk to you about.”
"Of course.” That’s when I realized that this had been planned. Jayden had brought me up here because Lucas wanted to talk to me. That made me curious, and a little apprehensive. Was he going to kick me out? I should’ve insisted that he take back his bedroom.
My breath hitched as I sat down across from him. “What's going on?
“I wanted to apologize.”
“Apologize?”
“For the way I've been acting.”
That made me smile. “Are you referring to how you stopped me from sleeping in my car? Or for inviting me into your home? Or for giving up your room for me?”
Lucas smiled softly. His eyes were kind, like they had been when I first met him. “We're friends. I'm glad I could help.”
“So what are you apologizing for?”
“The way I've been with Kyle.” His smile faded. “You're an innocent bystander and I'm sorry you've seen me behave that way. I just—I’m trying, but it’s hard.”
His sincere tone made my heart ache with sympathy. “I understand. You two have a bad history, and some things aren’t easy to get past.”
“That’s an understatement. I hate that he brings out the worst in me, and that you have to see that.” He couldn’t quite meet my eyes as he spoke. “You and Jayden have been collateral damage, and for that I’m truly sorry.”
“Thank you for saying that.” I thought it over and realized there was something I had to tell him, too. “I’m sorry if me staying at your house has made it worse.”
He looked surprised. “Are you kidding? If anything, you’ve made it better. You're probably the only reason we haven't killed each other yet.”
I laughed at his joke, trying to make this easier on him.
But his expression had a sad note to it. “I don't like the fact that you have to tutor him, but I still respect it. I'm sorry if my behavior has made that harder for you.” He glanced out the window at the mountains in the distance, and then back to me. “I'd like to make it up to you. Can I take you to dinner tomorrow night?
“Dinner?” As far as I knew, Jayden had been planning to cook spaghetti. He'd done a grocery run Sunday morning and we'd all chipped in. We hadn't quite gotten a cooking schedule worked out, but so far, we’d managed. “I thought we were going to eat at home.
“Jayden and Kyle can eat at home. I'd like to take you out tomorrow.”
“That’s kind, but it’s not necessary. You haven't done anything wrong, and you don't owe me an apology. You?—"
He placed his hand lightly on top of mine, stopping my words. His touch was warm, grounding, and it felt right, somehow.
"Tori, I'm trying to ask you out on a date."
Oh.
For a second, my brain blanked. Lucas, asking me on a date? I hadn't expected that.
“A date?” I echoed stupidly.
His green eyes were steady on mine. “Only if you want to. If you don’t, that’s perfectly fine, except you’ll be subjected to Jayden's dubious culinary talents. Which are still better than mine.”
“That omelet you made this morning was really good.” That was stretching the truth a little, but I’d liked watching him in the kitchen. Whatever he did, whether it was studying, cooking, or sorting through things in the basement, he always focused so intently. Which made it easy to take peeks at him without getting caught.
“Thanks.” Lucas’s green eyes seemed to see right into my soul as he waited for my answer.
If he’d asked me out last year, I wouldn’t have hesitated. But things were different now. I was living with him—that could get messy. I’d been enjoying getting to know all of my roommates, and it was probably selfish, but I didn’t want to do something with one that might cut the other two out.
Even though that made no sense.
Lucas waited patiently, giving me space, which only made me appreciate him more. He was a good guy. Kind. Supportive. And smart, of course. Scarily smart.
And he was my friend. That was the bottom line, I realized.
“Yes, I’d love to.”
A slow, genuine smile stretched across his face, and my stomach fluttered. It was as if the friction from the past week melted away. He looked so genuinely pleased at my answer. His shoulders were relaxed, and his smile was a little higher one side, which was a good look on him. The more I thought about it, the more I wanted to go.
“I’ll pick you up at your place tomorrow at seven?” He tried to say it with a straight face, but it was pretty funny given the circumstances.
“My place is your room,” I said with a laugh.
“Then I have no excuse if I’m late.”
“Unless you get lost on your journey from the living room.”
He laughed at that. Then he checked his phone and started gathering up his things. “Should we head downstairs?”
“Yes, I guess it’s time.”
We walked toward the elevators, his arm close to mine. This time, I felt the urge to take his hand, which was absurd, considering I’d thought the same thing about Jayden an hour earlier. What the hell was going on with me? That wouldn’t be an easy question to answer.
And there was Jayden, waiting for us in the basement, leaning against a bookcase that had probably been new a hundred years ago. His jaw was tight, his expression unreadable.
“I was beginning to think you weren’t going to show.” He glanced at Lucas, his eyebrows raised. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Lucas nod. Okay, so Jayden had known what Lucas was going to ask me. Did that mean he was okay with it? Guilt washed over me, because if Jayden had been the one to ask me on a date, I would’ve said yes to him, too. What the hell was wrong with me?
Lucas and I kept going, but then Jayden intercepted Lucas. “There’s something I need to tell you,” he muttered, and I slipped past him since he hadn’t been talking to me.
I barely had time to wonder what Jayden needed to say before I rounded the corner and froze.
Amanda and Roger were there, holding a conversation with a dark-haired man.
Kyle was back.