16. Beau
Beau
I’d managed to get some food in her the first time she’d woken up after her nap, even if it was just a little soup.
Her fucking neck looked terrible, but she said it wasn’t bothering her as much as her wrist and ankle being immobilized.
The meds were still keeping things foggy for her, and I was honestly grateful.
Travis: Need to call the vet, boss.
Fuck. That message coming in from one of the guys was never good.
Travis: Got some of the cattle looking like they caught pink eye.
You separate them from the rest of the herd?
Travis: Yup. Got them back to the barn for quarantine. Just spoke to Boss Sr. and he’s calling over to get someone out ASAP. Told me to keep you in the loop.
Thanks, man. Let me know what the vet says and keep an eye on the rest of the herd. That shit spreads fast.
Travis: You got it.
“Can I take a bath?”
I set my phone down, not expecting to see Birdie’s eyes back open.
“Hey, sleepyhead. I didn’t think you’d be back awake so soon.”
She shook her head. “I think I was starting to dream about…this morning. I don’t want to keep…”
I reached out, sweeping some of her hair that had fallen out of the bun I’d helped her put it in earlier over her shoulder.
“Give me one sec, I’ll get the bath ready for you.” I pushed myself out of the bed, looking back over my shoulder when I heard her yawn. There was more color in her cheeks, which was great. But hearing the way her voice caught when she mentioned her dream…God, it fucking gutted me.
The water from the faucet almost drowned out the hatred I felt in my stomach for the unknown bastard who’d taken the light from her eyes. I was still hunched over, pouring a cap-full of the body wash she kept in my shower to use as a make-shift bubble bath when I felt her hand resting on my back.
“I would have carried you in here,” I groaned, seeing her rest all of her weight on her uninjured leg.
“And I don’t need you to do that.”
My fingers brushed up her arms. I kept my touch light, barely there, so she could get away if it was too much. But I should have known better. Because in an instant, she was pressing herself against my body, her arms wrapping tightly around my waist.
“Can you help me get undressed?” she asked as the temperature in the room spiked with the citrus scent of her body wash. “I still feel a bit wobbly from the medicine.”
“Of course I can.” My fingers moved to the hem of the zip up, slipping under to touch the soft, warm skin of her hips. I’d seen and cataloged every bump and bruise on her when I helped her change earlier, so why was every inch of my body shaking with nerves right now?
“You don’t have to,” she said softly, but as soon as my eyes snapped back to her face, I instantly knew the reason for her hesitation.
“Birdie, I—”
“No. I understand. You and I…we haven’t…seen each other completely naked yet. And I get that I’m battered and I’m bruised. If you don’t want to look at me like this, if you don’t want to touch me…”
I just shook my head as I reached for the zipper of the hoodie I’d wrapped her up in. Once that was done and out of my way, I slipped my hands under the fabric at her shoulder and encouraged it down her arms until it fell to the floor. Birdie turned, the clasps for her bra now right in front of me.
I fucking held my breath, knowing I couldn’t mess this moment up.
I wanted her to know she was always safe with me.
Whether she was feeling confident, or especially when she was hurt and feeling vulnerable.
But when I slipped the straps down her arms and took the bra away, Birdie didn’t turn back to face me.
“Turn around, Chickadee,” I groaned, hoping my dick would get the message that now was not the time to get excited about seeing her naked.
“I’m sad this is how you’re seeing me naked for the first time. Now every time you look at my body, all you’re going to think about is how broken I am in this moment,” she whispered, not turning around.
“There is nothing broken about the woman standing in front of me. Not one single thing. You are the strongest woman I know, and it’s an honor that you trust me to be here while you’re not feeling your best. But baby, there will be nothing but awe, and love, and probably some damn lust because I can’t fucking control it, when you turn around and look into my eyes.
” I settled my hands against her hips. “Turn around, Birdie.”
She turned, her eyes staying closed as she turned to face me. I kept my eyes on her face.
“Open your eyes. I want you to see exactly how I feel when I look at you.”
Her lashes fluttered for a moment as her shoulders went up and down with her breath. The anticipation buzzed in the air between us. And then, her eyes locked on mine.
I couldn’t have held back my smile even if I wanted to.
Because what a fucking honor it was to look at the woman I loved.
My eyes slowly toured her exposed skin. I didn’t think about the bruises I could see.
Those would fade. They would live on her skin for only a moment.
We had our whole lives together. When I looked at her shoulders, I thought of all the summers we spent too long out in the sun, and the way they turned redder than a tomato every time she had a sun burn.
My eyes shifted, running along the ridge of her collarbone.
How that little spot of skin could have my heart in my throat and my cock aching, I’d never fully understand.
And then my fucking eyes almost fell out of my goddamn head. Because there, right in front of me, was something I’d only ever dared to let my mind wander to a handful of times.
“Fuck,” I whispered. “You’re fucking perfect. Nothing I could have ever dreamed up in my mind could compare to actually seeing you.”
My dick jumped as I licked my lips, looking at her perfect, dusty, rose-colored nipples. They pebbled under my gaze, and there was desire in my gut so strong it nearly bowled me over when I thought about how badly I wanted to wrap my lips around them.
But that could wait. There was still more of Birdie to undress, and I planned to unwrap her like that gift that she was.
Because even though in this moment we weren’t doing it in a rush of hotheaded hormones, it was even more important to me to get it right.
To touch her in a way that showed her how fucking much I loved her.
How fucking sorry I was for what had happened.
And how I meant every last word of my promises to her, that it would never happen again.
“Will you get in the bath with me?” she asked as I ran my fingers over her hips.
“Of course I will.”
“Can I…” Her eyes dropped, and my groan was louder than the rapidly rising water level in the tub.
“Birdie,” I choked out her name as her uninjured hand moved toward me. “I better keep them on. I just…there’s just a little situation, and I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”
I felt the heat of her stare on my crotch, instantly reaching down to adjust myself through my shorts.
“Oh.” The smallest smile pulled up the corner of her lips. “I didn’t think…not with me looking like—”
“Like the most delicious, juicy peach? I’m trying not to remember how you feel like fucking heaven. Trust me, what you went through today, it doesn’t change how I see you. I want you. So fucking bad.”
“I want you, too,” she said quietly. “We better get to it. We’re going to overflow the tub if we don’t get a move on.”
I chuckled, reaching over to turn the water off before I pulled my shirt off over my head.
I dropped to my knees, my fingers shaking as I helped her out of her panties.
Fucking Christ, I couldn’t hold back. As gently as I could, I let my lips skim over the soft skin on her belly.
Birdie sighed, her body melting closer to mine as I peppered kisses over her hip and down her thigh.
I stopped to a groan from her that killed me, and reached down to undo the brace wrapped around her ankle.
“Put your hands on my shoulders and lift your leg up for me,” I instructed. “Don’t set it back on the floor. I’m going to climb into the tub with you in my arms.”
As soon as the brace was off, I scooped her up into my arms, stepped over the wall of the tub and sank down into the warm water.
Birdie settled between my legs, her back pressed against my chest. I guided her arm with the wrist brace still on it over to the side of the tub, where it could rest while I made sure she relaxed.
“I wish I could put my wrist in here,” she mumbled. “The warm water feels amazing on my ankle.”
“I know, but you heard the doctor. Your wrist is worse off than your ankle. He said it was okay for you to slip off the ankle brace for a bath, but that brace on your wrist needs to stay on as much as possible for the next few days. I’ll get some ice for it once we’re done in here.”
Her head turned, and she pressed a kiss right to the underside of my jaw. She moved, like she was about to turn away from me again, but I wouldn’t ever miss the chance again for a real kiss from her.
So, I took my hand out of the water and slipped it along her cheek, turning her face back toward mine until I was able to capture her lips with my own.
And then her body shook. Convulsing uncontrollably.
“Hey…Birdie?”
“I’m sorry,” she cried. “I’m so sorry. I’m trying to be strong. I’m trying to remember that I’m okay. That he didn’t hurt me that badly. That it could have been so much worse.”
“You don’t have to be strong for me,” I choked over my words, my voice sounding like it was a million miles away. “You need to let it out. It’s just you and me here. You’re safe. Let go, Chickadee.”