Chapter 4
This couldn’t happen.
The past she had suffered and survived couldn’t become her future.
Putting the dagger back in the sheath, I stared blankly at the cold food. She knew so much about me.
Her words were deceptive, but her eyes revealed the entire story.
When I caught her staring at me with wide, innocent eyes, I felt overwhelmed by the growing sense of duty beyond mere protection.
A part of me felt responsible for her happiness as well. At one moment, I sensed her eyes searching for a man more than a saviour in me, but at another, she seamlessly reminded me of my sins.
I sat, holding my face in my palms. I shouldn’t have pointed a dagger at her neck. My anger heightened her fear.
But I couldn’t stop myself when she wanted to be with me, hear me, and watch me, and then brought up how I’m cheating on my fiancée.
No.
This shouldn’t have happened, and it won’t happen.
I had to stay away from her. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be able to fight my enemies or keep my promises to myself.
Stay away from women.
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It had been three days since we last talked, and things had heated up. I couldn’t shake off the flashes of her face. Her eyes pooled with tears, her shaky breaths, the sound of her heartbeats—it all added up to my growing insanity.
And the more I tried to avoid her, the closer I was drawn to her.
“Ji, Bhai-sa, you called for me?” I asked, standing before Rudra Bhai-sa. He lifted his gaze from the paper.
I immediately plastered a smile on my face. I needed to forget about caring, worrying, and thinking about her.
“Yes, Agastya, I spoke with Badi-maa, Daadi-sa, and Rani-maa, and they suggested we have the baby shower. Even the royal priest believes holding it in two days is ideal,” he explained.
“So, I want you to take care of the arrangements. I’ll send out the invitations, and you can handle the decorations, menu, and hosting preparations. ”
A broad smile spread across my face.
“Celebration?” I asked, kneeling before him, and he nodded.
“Celebration!”
I loved celebrations, so I immediately lunged at him for a hug. He leaned back and patted my back.
“By the way, what happened in Mehrangarh?” he asked, nudging me away.
I gulped, shaking my head. “Nothing. It seems…normal,” I lied, sitting beside him as I plucked grapes from the basket.
“Strange. Are you sure?” he asked, and I nodded, meeting his gaze.
“Also, Mehrangarh seems pretty foolish.” I chuckled, and he patted my back.
“You’re a prince now. Act accordingly in front of others and behind the scenes,” he scolded, only making me smile wider.
I loved Rudra and Ranvijay Bhai-sa’s care for me.
“Ranaji.” Suddenly, her voice caught my attention, and I looked up to see her bringing a platter, followed by a few more attendants.
My smile faded as she knelt by the table, serving lunch.
“Have you eaten yet?” Bhai-sa asked, and I shook my head, gazing at him.
“Suman, make one for Agastya as well,” he instructed.
She replied, “Ji, Ranaji.”
“I… don’t want to, Bhai-sa. Actually…” I cleared my throat. “I need to work on something,” I said, trying to avoid looking at her.
A strange ache built in my chest as I watched her.
Bhai-sa stopped me and said, “No, eat first.”
I gulped, unknowingly being pulled by her presence. Faded marks and two bangles marked her wrist. She didn’t look at me.
“And how is Rashmika?” Bhai-sa’s voice broke my thoughts.
I briefly closed my eyes and replied, “She’s good,” while looking at him.
“I heard you didn’t attend the Gangaur pooja21
with her,” he said, and I smiled, shaking my head.
“I wanted to, I really did, but I couldn’t return from the temple on time.” It was a half-truth.
“Oh! Why don’t you invite her to Nandani’s baby shower? That way, you’ll spend more time together. Because, no matter what, she will be your wife,” he said, staring into my eyes. His words held authority.
“Of course, my wife,” I laughed abruptly, looking away from him.
Suman placed sliced onions and a bowl of jaggery on my plate. My heart sank. Hundreds of people inhabited the palace, and nobody knew what I liked to eat.
“Thank you,” I muttered, pulling it closer to me, and Rudra Bhai-sa began speaking.
She left without responding.
I couldn’t eat a single bite, knowing I could do something for her, and I wasn’t doing it.
I wanted to see her smile, if not much, then at least how she used to before that incident. Not that I had seen her, but I had noticed her.
After having a few bites, I took leave of Rudra Bhai-sa and returned to my chamber.
I was happy about the celebration, but a celebration only meant hectic days for her.
Our life as the royals was easy; we could command, but she had to work with her hands, listen, and be answerable for everything.
I understood it was her job, but she was mine now.
No!
She wasn’t.
Still, why was I feeling strange and bothered by her presence and absence if she wasn’t?
?????
For the whole day, I focused solely on decorations and the upcoming event at the palace. After finishing the palace’s exterior, halls, corridors, and gardens, I finally arrived at Rudra Bhai-sa and Nandani Bhabhi-sa’s chamber.
I wasn’t eager to go in. I knew that if I did, I would end up confronting her. Yet, I had no choice.
I couldn’t ignore Bhai-sa’s words.
The baby shower was only a day away, and close relatives, especially Nandani Bhabhi-sa’s family, had already arrived.
When I reached their chamber, I saw everyone seated in the guest chamber with Nandani Bhabhi-sa. I smiled before greeting them.
“Pranaam, Daadi-sa.” I first greeted Bhabhi-sa’s grandmother, followed by her mother, Trisha, and Abhinandan. I couldn’t forget their warm hospitality when I first met them during Holi after Rudra Bhai-sa’s wedding.
“How are your wedding preparations going, Agastya?” Daadi-sa asked as she pulled me to sit beside her.
I inhaled sharply, struggling to come up with a response. “Great! Awesome!” I chuckled.
“I heard you visited your in-laws to celebrate Ganguar with your fiancée. How romantic!” Daadi-sa remarked.
I nervously shook my head as I noticed Suman bringing in the juice and snacks. She set the plate before Daadi-sa, smiled, and squatted to touch her feet.
“Pranaam, Daadi-sa. How are you?” she asked warmly, her gaze never meeting mine.
I noticed a pale glow with a mole on her right cheek as the sun illuminated her face.
“God bless you. I’m young, slim, and beautiful,” Daadi-sa said, caressing Suman’s head.
Everyone laughed.
I couldn’t.
Her lips didn’t form a smile either.
Is something bothering her?
“I’ve heard you’re taking great care of Nandani, Suman. I hope she isn’t too much trouble,” Daadi-sa laughed.
Suman shook her head and smiled. “Not at all, Daadi-sa,” she replied before greeting others.
I turned away from her, attempting to exchange smiles with Abhinandan, who returned the gesture while sitting across from me with Nandani Bhabhi-sa.
Meanwhile, Trisha and Nandani Bhabhi-sa were engaged in conversation.
Suman walked away to stand in the corner with the other attendants. Her expressionless face and lowered gaze created a knot in my stomach.
“Ugh…” I looked at Daadi-sa and then at everyone else. “I have to go. I need to finish some work. I’ll catch up with you all later,” I said, rising to excuse myself.
Bhabhi-sa stared at me in disbelief. As I was leaving, I noticed Aishwarya Bhabhi-sa and Ranvijay Bhai-sa entering.
“What happened?” Ranvijay Bhai-sa stopped me.
“Nothing. I need to take care of the decorations. I’ll join you later,” I explained, and he smiled.
“Alright,”
I spent the entire evening decorating Bhai-sa and Bhabhi-sa’s chamber. I didn’t do it alone; I managed everything—the flower selection, the curtains, the colours—all of it.
It looked beautiful. I felt happy and on cloud nine, but one face’s smile suddenly became crucial to me.
I wanted to ask her if something was wrong, but I couldn’t. Hope was the last thing I could offer her, especially after seeing how drained she seemed.
After finishing the garden and the sitting area where the main event would occur, I walked back to meet Rudra Bhai-sa and Bhabhi-sa before heading to my chamber.
The next day, I woke early to work at the entrance. I called for the helpers and started before anyone else woke up. I couldn’t sleep at all the night before.
My gaze fell on her as she worked nearby. She was carrying a plate of full colours, and my brows knitted in confusion, wondering what she would do with them.
She didn’t notice me standing in the corner as she walked past. She seemed lost. Her face looked tired, with dark circles under her eyes and apparent weakness.
“Here, this is for the Rangoli22,” she said, handing the plate to another attendant.
“But why? You make the best Rangoli. Why aren’t you making it?” the other one asked, to which she smiled and shook her head.
“I am… busy with other things,” she replied.
“What’s more important than making the Rangoli?” the attendant countered.
“I need to work in the kitchen before Nandani wakes up,” she explained, and my brows creased together in confusion.
“Kunwar-sa, where should we hang these red curtains?” A helper caught my attention, and I inhaled deeply, pointing to the top of the gallery.
“There, how many times should I tell you?”
I noticed her walk past me, glancing at me briefly. I immediately followed her.
“Suno,” (Hey.) I called, but she continued walking, ignoring me.
My eyes widened at her audacity.
“Hey,” I called again, quickening my pace, and she responded by walking even faster. I noticed a few attendants watching us. My jaw tightened.
“Hey,” I shouted again, almost marching a foot behind her, before she turned right and headed to the kitchen.
Noticing the deserted corner, I quickly positioned myself before her and looked into her eyes.
“Why are you running from me?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.
“Why are you running after me?” she countered, inhaling deeply, a sign of her displeasure at my interruption.
“Why did you deny making the Rangoli?” I pressed, and she shook her head, attempting to walk past me.
“Because I don’t want to.”
My brows knitted together. “Why?” I inquired, spreading my arms before her and gazing into her eyes.
“I have other important things to do,” she stated.
“What’s more important than making the Rangoli? I’ve heard you make the best. Why aren’t you making one for the baby shower?”
She gulped. The glow on her face faded as she tried to move past me again.
I couldn’t help but grip her wrist and pull her back in front of me.
Her eyes widened in shock, her hand gripping mine, her gaze fierce with anger.
“Kunwar-sa,” she breathed in a low voice, warning me.
“This is an important day. Make the Rangoli,” I said, almost pleadingly, my voice lowered.
“I can’t,” she replied immediately.
“Why?”
“I have other things to do.”
“You don’t love Bhabhi-sa and the baby?” I asked, stepping back when she looked uncomfortable.
Her eyes filled with tears. “I do love them, but I have other things to do,” she insisted, and I found it hard to believe her.
“You can do those later. Just imagine how happy Bhabhi-sa will be to see the Rangoli made by you,” I said, and she shook her head.
“Please,” A tear rolled down her cheek, and noticing an attendant approaching, she quickly turned and dashed into the kitchen.
What is wrong?
She didn’t seem herself.
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