23. Lena
23
LENA
O ver the weekend, Lena had tried several times to phone Thomas and sent him several messages, but he hadn’t responded. It was a tricky situation for her because she cared about him but also didn’t feel that she had any right to expect anything of him. Their relationship was so new and uncertain, and while she knew he could be deliberately ignoring her, it could also be something else. Perhaps he was busy. He was volunteering at the sanctuary now; he had Fifi to care for, as well as his sister and her family. The last thing Lena wanted to do was add pressure to his life, and so she’d decided to give him some space to deal with everything. This could be nothing to worry about and if not then she would deal with it when she knew what was going on.
She’d had a busy weekend anyway, writing and getting things ready for when she collected Harvey. The thought of bringing the little boy home later made her so happy that she could burst. It had been a long time since Lena had felt properly excited about anything and she was very excited about this. She was going to be a dog mum and to be solely responsible for another creature and it was the best feeling in the world. She would give Harvey the best life possible and in return, she hoped he would love her back.
This morning, to keep herself busy she’d walked to the café with her laptop and intended on having a working breakfast and then heading home to get her car and go and pick Harvey up. She’d set his new harness and lead out ready and fitted the hammock into the back seat of the car.
‘Morning, Pearl,’ she said at the counter.
‘Hello, lovely.’ Pearl smiled. ‘How’re you doing?’
‘I’m excited about collecting Harvey later from the rescue sanctuary.’
‘I’m sure you are. You’ll have to bring him here when he’s settled in with you.’
‘I certainly will.’ Lena rocked on her feet as her belly fizzed again.
‘What’ll you have?’ Pearl asked.
Lena ordered some breakfast then sat on the green leather sofa and set her laptop up on the table. The Garden Café was one of her favourite places and she could imagine bringing Harvey here with her. He could sit on the sofa next to her while she wrote and she’d order him something dog friendly — Ellie had created a small dog friendly menu — and she’d order for herself then they could eat and watch the world go by.
It was Ellie who brought her food and coffee over and she took a seat at the table opposite Lena. ‘How’re you doing?’ she asked, her eyes filled with concern.
‘I’m OK.’ Lena grinned. ‘Excited.’
‘Excited?’ Ellie frowned.
‘Abut collecting Harvey later.’
‘Of course!’ Ellie tapped her forehead. ‘Sorry, I’d forgotten with everything.’
‘With everything?’ Ellie asked.
‘Well, you know… social media and the newspapers over the weekend.’ Ellie grimaced. ‘Awful, really awful.’
Unease stirred inside Lena and she put her mug down. ‘What’s awful?’ she asked. ‘I haven’t looked at any of it to be honest, because after I made my decision to quit journalism, I felt so free. And I’ve been so busy writing and preparing to collect Harvey that I haven’t looked at any socials. It was nice to have a social media break to be honest. I hate doom scrolling.’
‘That makes sense, and I totally get it. Lena…’ Ellie sighed and shook her head. ‘There was a story in Friday’s news about Thomas. The headlines were horrid. Thomas must feel terrible after seeing them.’
‘Oh god… That explains why I haven’t heard from him and he must think I’m the worst person in the world because I haven’t spoken to him about them.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘I’ve been trying to get hold of him but assumed he was busy or needed some peace and quiet. I don’t like to put pressure on him because… well, I know what he’s been through and I… I don’t want to crowd him.’ She chewed at a ragged cuticle on her thumb as dread filled her. ‘What did the headlines say?’
Ellie filled her in and Lena’s shoulders grew tighter with every word. By the time Ellie had finished, Lena felt sick to her stomach. ‘Poor Thomas. That’s such an invasion of his privacy and I’m sure he’s devastated. He thought he was safe here.’
‘I don’t think anywhere is safe from the media, especially not now everyone has smart phones and can upload photos and videos online at any time.’
‘I’d better go and see him.’ Ellie looked at her full plate where the scrambled eggs and beans were cooling rapidly. ‘Sorry about this.’
‘Why don’t you eat first? You’ll need some energy, especially if you’re going to get Harvey later. I’ll get you a fresh coffee.’ Ellie smiled and patted Lena’s hand.
Lena was torn between wanting to rush over to see Thomas and needing to collect her thoughts. She opened the search bar on her laptop and googled Thomas Dryden and the most recent results filled the screen. Reading quickly, she got the gist of the articles, and as she browsed the photographs, her skin prickled uncomfortably. The invasion of privacy was horrific and whoever had taken the photos had gone to town on Thomas. They’d got photos of her too, clear shots of her stomach and the long scar but she didn’t care about that. They could say what they liked about her because she was, essentially no one, and the only interest in her was because she was with Thomas. But for him, to have his scars plastered over the media and after he’d been so brave in wearing shorts and speaking to her about how he felt… it was like a kick in the guts from a horse.
How could she help him with this?
Could she help him with this?
He had a lot to deal with on a daily basis having lost the career he cared about and the person he’d been before the accident and she knew he was still grieving for who he’d been before. In her own way, so was she, and yet she felt like she was reinventing herself here in this peaceful place. She felt more herself here than she had done in London and she was convinced it was the scenery, the good air and the fact that it had helped her to heal. Every day she spent here was another step in the right direction. She would never have what she’d once longed for but that didn’t mean she couldn’t be happy.
She ate what she could of the breakfast then drank the fresh coffee Ellie brought her and packed up her things, preparing to leave. She walked out into the sunshine and closed her eyes for a moment, breathing deep of the fragrant air.
‘Lena?’
She opened her eyes. ‘Oh… Hi, Marnie.’
Thomas’ pregnant sister was standing in front of the café, her bump looking very low down in the navy and white striped maternity T-shirt. She was wearing it with denim shorts and white plimsoles. Her dark hair was pinned on top of her head, and she looked exhausted.
‘Marnie… I’ve been trying to get hold of Thomas all weekend. I didn’t know what had happened because I was working and offline but Ellie just told me and… I’m so sorry.’
‘You’re sorry?’ Marnie’s dark brows met. ‘Oh god, it wasn’t you was it?’
‘What?’ Lena’s mouth dropped open. ‘You don’t think that was me, surely?’
Marnie’s eyes widened and she shook her head. ‘No, I don’t. I told Thomas it wasn’t you. I said it would be some opportunist who spotted him and took the photos. Obviously, it was someone who’s been hanging around for a while, perhaps on holiday here or perhaps there was one photo shared somewhere and then it attracted other journalists. Oh, I don’t know. It’s hard to think straight.’ She winced and rubbed her belly then placed a hand on her forehead.
‘Marnie, what is it?’ Lena stepped closer to her. ‘Do you feel OK?’
‘I… I’m not sure.’
‘Come and sit for a moment and I’ll get you some water.’
Lena helped Marnie to a bench then placed her bag on the table and crouched down in front of Marnie. ‘Is it the baby?’
‘I have the most awful headache that I can’t shift.’
‘Have you spoken to the midwife?’
Marnie shook her head. ‘It’s been an awful weekend of worrying about Thomas and I think it’s just the stress. I’m supposed to avoid stress…’ She gave a wry laugh. ‘Hard when my baby brother is going through a crisis.’
‘Poor you and poor Thomas. I’ll go to him and see if I can help.’
‘Lena, he thinks you sold him out.’ Marnie leant her elbow on the table then her head on her hand.
‘I swear I didn’t.’ Lena’s heart ached at the thought that Thomas and his family could think she’d betrayed him. ‘Why would I do that?’
Marnie placed a hand on her shoulder. ‘I don’t think you did. I didn’t believe it would have been you, anyway. But Thomas really struggles to trust anyone and because you are a journalist, he thought it must have been you.’
‘I’m devastated.’ Lena’s eyes filled with tears. ‘He must think I’m a monster.’
‘No, love, he just thinks he is.’
Lena gasped and nodded. ‘Oh Thomas… my poor sweetheart.’
‘You two need to talk. I’m sure you can work it out.’ Marnie’s eyes grew wide as saucers and her lips went pale.
‘Marnie? What is it? I’ll go and get that water for you.’ Lena stood up and looked around but they were the only people in that part of the gardens.
‘Don’t leave me!’ Marnie grabbed her hand and moaned. ‘Oh no… It’s too soon.’
Lena looked down and saw fluid running down Marnie’s leg and fear gripped her like icy hands. She pulled her phone from her pocket and found Ellie’s number.
‘Come quickly! Out the front!’ she said into her phone then she ended the call and crouched in front of Marnie again. ‘It’s OK, Marnie. Everything will be OK. Help is on the way.’
As Ellie and Pearl hurried out of the café and took over, Lena sat next to Marnie on the bench and phoned Thomas, praying that he’d answer this time.