Chapter 24
Chapter Twenty-Four
Saylor
I was living out of a hotel, but I didn't spend much time there.
As soon as I returned to work, I remembered why I needed the summer break.
The atmosphere of our office was chaotic.
There were numerous assignments that were being thrown at us at any given time, and we were working in several groups, competing for the winning graphic design or marketing campaign.
There was infighting and backstabbing and competition. I felt stressed all the time and wondered how I ever thought this was fun and exciting. Now I longed for the lazy mornings, huge breakfasts that Marshall cooked, and the evenings talking by the pool or on the beach.
I spent my time in an office with the air-conditioning running around the clock. I didn't spend any time outside and barely had time to eat a meal, much less watch TV or relax in my room. I certainly didn't have time to hunt for an apartment.
But I had to do something, I couldn't live in a hotel indefinitely. Any time I thought about searching online for available apartments, my chest tightened, and I couldn't bring myself to type the words.
Marshall had sent several texts asking how I was doing or if I was enjoying being back at my job, and I felt like I had to put on a facade. This was what I wanted, so I shouldn't complain about it, right?
Marshall wanted assurances that I was happy so he could move on. He didn't think he made a mistake in letting me go. If so, he would have followed me here after dropping off Hayden with her mother.
I'd even gotten a few texts from Hayden with images of her deciding between two outfits at a store. I was happy to interact with her but wondered if she was settling into life with her mother. I wanted to ask Marshall, but it wasn't my place.
We weren't together. Hayden wasn't my responsibility, but I was concerned about her. It felt like Marshall and Hayden were mine to worry about. I couldn't just shut off the feelings. I wanted to know how Hayden was faring, whether Marshall was lonely in the beach cottage all by himself.
How did he feel after he returned from his morning runs? Did he still cook large breakfasts, remembering what it was like when me and Hayden were there to talk to? Did he enjoy spending time with us at the senior center?
For the millionth time, I tried to focus on my computer screen. I'd been working on several projects at once. All of them had deadlines that were approaching. I used to thrive on this kind of pressure. Now it felt like my creativity had been sucked out of me.
I couldn't come up with an idea. Everything seemed like it had been done before or wasn't unique enough.
I'd forgotten how awful my coworkers were, everyone out for themselves, wanting to win the project and get the bonus.
I just wanted to create something amazing that the client would love. I didn't want to compete with other designers or work all hours of the night because it was due at some arbitrary time.
I wanted freedom. I wanted to walk the beach in the morning to hunt for seashells, letting ideas percolate in my head until I had the right one.
I wanted to wake up in Marshall's arms and go to sleep on his chest. I wanted to know if she was enjoying her life in Naples again.
I wanted so many things I didn't have the right to anymore. I'd let it all go when I left Sanibel. I hadn't told Marshall how I felt. Hayden had urged me to be upfront with him about my feelings, but I hadn't listened to her.
I was too scared to take a risk. Flynn had done a number on me, and trusting a man again was harder than I thought it would be. How could I trust that my feelings for him would be enough? Then he'd reciprocate them?
That he'd want me in his life forever? It sounded so scary, impossible even. How could we know that we were the ones for each other after two summers together? We'd been together before. Maybe that counted for something.
We had a history together. Maybe when you found the person you were supposed to be with, you didn't need years to know that he was the one.
Maybe it was something that you knew deep inside. It was a knowing, an intuition.
On Friday, one of my old friends Eliza invited me to coffee. I usually ate lunch at my desk, but there was time for me to run to the coffee shop. I was excited about the meeting, hoping this meant that I hadn't lost all my friends here.
I rushed to the coffee shop down the street, worried I was late. Inside, Eliza was waiting for me.
"Did you already order?" I asked her, after giving her a hug.
"Um. No."
That was an odd answer. "Let's get in line together then."
"Actually, I'm just here to give you this. Flynn found it on the nightstand and didn't want to give it to you himself."
"What could he possibly have of mine? I put everything in storage."
"He said it was a necklace he bought you for your anniversary."
I scoffed. "You mean the one we celebrated while he was dating someone else?"
Eliza grimaced. "He said you would say that."
I tipped my head to the side, considering her. "I thought we were friends." When she remained silent, I continued, "You knew he was dating both of us."
"It wasn't my place to say anything."
I sighed, feeling exhausted. "I don't care about him. But I thought you were my friend. Why didn't you tell me?"
She sniffed. "Your relationship with him wasn't my business."
I shook my head. "You were never my friend, because if you were, you would have told me as soon as you found out. What he did erased everything between us. I suspected that I'd lost my friends to him too, but this confirms it."
I turned to leave.
"Wait. What am I supposed to do with this?" She held up the necklace, and I laughed, feeling freer than I had before I walked into the coffee shop. "Throw it out."
Then I pushed open the door and walked the short distance to my office. I breathed in the air, taking in the traffic and the people on the street. This city was nothing like Sanibel, and I missed the island as if it was a living, breathing thing.
The island had become my home. I wanted to do everything I could to be living and working there again. I wanted to be able to support myself and create the life I wanted on my own terms. I was done with reporting to someone else.
I'd reach out to the businesses on the island to see if they could use my services for their logos, menus, or even their websites. I'd always thought I had to work for someone else, that I didn't know enough about business to do it on my own. But I was smart; I could make it work.
Whenever I worked with clients directly, they seemed to like my approach. I could carry that into a business.
I didn't need someone else to be the go-between. I wanted to control my destiny.
I'd spend the evening researching what I needed to do to start my own business. Even if this thing with Marshall didn't work out, I could still live on the island.
I'd be okay without him, even if the thought of attempting to live there without him by my side was physically painful.
I'd made the decision to move to the island and figure out a way to support myself with my work. Something about that decision released the creativity inside me, and I was able to finish the project I was working on before six.
I walked out of the office, feeling amazing. Normally, I would have felt pressured to stay longer and be the last one to leave for the night. Not anymore.
I had plans to make and a life to create. I was humming to myself when I heard someone call my name. I turned slowly, not quite believing the sound of the voice.
It was Marshall. "Saylor."
I looked around. "How are you here right now?"
"I wanted to talk to you."
"Is everything okay with Hayden?" I asked him, scared that he'd come to tell me something had happened. But wouldn't he have called, not driven here?
"She's fine, a little homesick for the island," he said with a chuckle.
"I'm feeling the same," I said carefully.
Marshall stepped toward me, his hand coming to rest on my cheek, lifting my face to meet his gaze. "I made a mistake."
My heart stuttered and then galloped ahead.
"I thought I needed to let you go. That the decision to stay had to come from you. It wasn't fair for me to ask you to stay. To tell you how I felt."
My brow furrowed. "How do you feel?"
"I love you, Saylor. I've been in love with you since we were eighteen. Maybe we were too young then, but we're not now. I know exactly what I want, and it's you."
My breath hitched.
"Tell me you feel the same way. The last few days have been hell. I haven't been able to relax enough to even sleep. I sit out on our deck and remember what it was like to have you by my side."
I blew out a breath. "I've hated it here too. I realized I hate my job. Not the work I do, but how I do it. Everything is so chaotic and competitive. I want more space to be creative."
A smile spread over his face. "You're thinking about opening a business?"
"Yes, and it's all because of you. I don't know if I would have seriously considered it if you hadn't put the idea into my head."
He let go of my cheek, pulling me hard against his body. "I'm so proud of you. You can do anything you set your mind to."
"What if I want you?" My voice wavered.
He stilled. "What are you saying?"
"I want to live on the island with you and Hayden. I adore our life there. I love everything about you. I love you."
He let out a breath. "I was so worried about giving you space and letting you make your own decisions. I didn't want to influence you, and then you were gone, and I was worried it would be forever. That we wouldn't get another chance."
"Why did you come here then?" I couldn't help but ask.
"Hudson and Elena told me that you couldn't make a decision unless you had all the facts, and the fact is that I love you, and I'm never going to stop. Even if you said you wanted to stay in Jacksonville and wanted nothing to do with me, I couldn't turn these feelings off."
Had I ever heard a more romantic declaration? "I can't either."
"Is there somewhere we can go?"
I nodded my head. "I have a hotel room. It's not much, but there's a bed."
He grinned, braiding his fingers through mine and said, "Lead the way. I can't wait to be alone with you. It's been too long."
Excitement bubbled in my chest as we walked hand in hand to my temporary home. There were still details to be worked out. The matter of when to officially leave my job and move to Sanibel. But I didn't want to draw things out. I wanted to start my new life in Sanibel now.
At the hotel, we rushed toward the elevators, slipping into one before the doors could slide shut. Since the elevator was full, I was content to stand in front of him with his chest at my back. Once we reached our floor, we got out, and I hurried down the hall, swiping my card over the sensor.
Inside, I laughed from the pent-up energy. I thought my day was going to end with take-out on my hotel bed and TV. But instead, Marshall was here.
He swiped a strand of hair out of my face. "I love you."
I grinned. "I love you too."
His eyes were filled with affection. "I've missed you so much the last few days."
How was it possible it had only been a few days when it felt like months? "Me too."
He gestured at the room. "I want to be here until we can figure out your move to Sanibel."
"What about Hayden?"
"She's settling into her mother's house."
I had questions about that because I wanted to make sure Hayden was happy, but now wasn't the time for that conversation. I finally had Marshall all to myself. "I can't believe you're here."
"I'm never letting you go again." His mouth lowered to mine, and I wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer.
We tugged at each other's clothes, neither of us willing to part long enough to get completely naked. Finally, Marshall pulled away with a laugh, shoving his pants down along with his briefs. His cock was long and hard between us, and I gripped the base and squeezed.
He groaned, tweaking my nipples through the lace of my bra.
I whimpered at the touch. I'd missed him so much.
He reached around, unhooking my bra, and I let the straps fall down my arms and off. I backed up so that I fell onto the bed, and he followed over me.
There was nothing better than the feel of his hard body over mine. I relished the warmth and the weight. He was anchoring in this moment, never letting me forget that he was mine.
His cock slid through my slick folds, easing inside of me, filling me like only he could.
We murmured words of love and forever as he moved slowly, never looking away from me.
This moment solidified everything we'd just shared.
We loved each other, and we were never letting each other go.
We'd build a life together in Sanibel and take care of the ones we loved.
Maybe we'd even start a family together.
My heart was so full; it was close to bursting.
When we went over, we did it together, our hearts beating rapidly and sweat covering our skin. He rolled to his back, bringing me with him. The aftermath of our love making was a sticky mess between my legs, but I couldn't bring myself to get up and clean it off.
"Your grandmother told me that she double-booked the cottage on purpose."
I gasped, supporting myself on one hand so I could see his face. "You're joking."
"She thought that we were meant to be together, and if she forced us into close proximity, everything would work itself out."
I slapped his chest lightly. "And we proved her right."
"She brought us together."
I dropped back down to his chest, his fingers playing with the ends of my hair. "Thank you for telling me how you feel. I had plans to quit my job and move to Sanibel, and I could only hope you felt the same way I did."
"From now on, we tell each other how we feel. No more hiding or pretending."
"I can't agree more." The last few weeks had been stressful and exhausting. But thinking about our future together felt light.
"We'll create the perfect life together."
I sat up so that I could kiss him, sensing we wouldn't get any sleep tonight.