32. Kaycia
Chapter 32
Kaycia
S hane’s kisses are urgent, bruising my mouth as he tilts my head back and swipes my lips with his tongue so I open to him. The gold of his eyes startled me when he spun around moments ago, but instead of responding with fear of the animal within him, I find that I crave it.
I crave everything about him.
What’s wrong with you? I think, even as I let the beer bottle slip from my fingers to thud and spill foam on the soft grass so I can trace the lines of his body with both hands. I recognize the risk I’m accepting by staying with him. This relationship is new, and I’ve faced more drama and danger in these past weeks than I ever imagined I would. But at the same time, it feels right to be here. Shane understands me better than the people I’ve known my whole life. He’d stand beside me, so I won’t abandon him now. Especially with that haunted look in his eyes.
Running my hands down his stomach I press my palm against his cock, straining beneath the worn denim of his jeans. The groan Shane exhales against my mouth sends heat pooling in my belly, coiling with anticipation. It chases away any second thoughts I might be having about my choices.
“Let me help you forget,” I whisper, sucking his lip into my mouth to coax another moan from him. “Just for a little while, let’s both forget. We can figure out the rest tomorrow.”
Dropping his own bottle to the ground, Shane scoops me into his arms and carries me toward the cabin. Staring over his shoulder at the blue sky and lush emerald forest, I imagine painting a shadowed couple with the same background. A contented huff escapes me, drawing Shane’s attention.
“What is it?” he murmurs with a shy smile and hooded gaze.
“Just thinking that you really might be my muse.”
“I’m flattered,” he replies with a chuckle, climbing the few steps to the deck, then carrying me over the threshold and pushing the door closed with his hip.
Shane carries me through the small living space and into the bedroom with its cozy quilts and wall of windows mirroring the openness of the front rooms of the cabin. He sets me gently at the end of the bed, then steps back to kick off his boots. I do the same with my shoes, but before he can do anything else, I grab the waistband of his jeans and tug him closer, gazing up at him as my chest warms with desire.
Shane’s eyes no longer look gold or hazel at this angle, they’re nearly black with need as he watches me unbutton his jeans, and then pull the zipper down so I can tug them off his hips. I stroke him, teasing him through the thin fabric of his boxer briefs so that he tips his head back with a ragged breath. From where I sit it’s easy to push his soft cotton tee up to reveal his stomach, then chest. He helps by pulling it over his head with one hand while I explore the planes of his body with my lips and tongue, nipping with my teeth so he hisses and his muscles tense. After a moment his hand settles under my chin, tilting my face up so I meet his hungry gaze.
“What do you want, Kaycia?” he murmurs, running his thumb over my cheekbone and then threading his fingers through my loose hair.
“To make you feel good, Shane,” I whisper. “To show you you’re not alone.”
For a moment, I worry I’ve ruined the mood. His eyes are glassy and far away as he swallows and cradles my head gently, but I proceed to trail open-mouthed kisses down his stomach, slipping off the edge of the bed to kneel before him and pull a heavy sigh from his lips. He tightens his grip on my hair as I smile mischievously, biting my lip and meeting his gaze while I pull his boxer briefs down. When I take him into my mouth, he closes his eyes and tips his head back with a moan. I echo him with a little whimper of my own as I tease him and slide him farther into my mouth, chasing my lips with one hand wrapped around him and letting him guide the speed with his increasingly rough grasp tangled in my hair. The dichotomy of his gentle sadness earlier and the pleasurable roughness makes my stomach flip and my core heat with desire. With a growl Shane suddenly pulls me away from him and to my feet.
“Don’t you want—” I start, but his lips crash against mine, his hand clutching the back of my neck as our tongues dance and breath becomes one.
“Not yet,” he groans into my mouth. “I want to get lost in you, Kaycia.”
I don’t answer. I don’t need to as I wrap my arms around him and our mouths meet once more. Shane turns so he sits on the bed, pulling me between his bare thighs and stripping my shirt and bra off. My breasts feel heavy with need as my nipples pebble from the cool air, then from his attention, as he runs a thumb over one while taking the other into his hot mouth. A rumble of approval ripples through him when I gasp at the sensation of him nipping at my flushed skin.
Moments later he lays back, pulling me atop him until all either of us can think about is the pleasure we find in the other’s embrace.
Laying together after, I watch Shane’s lashes flutter while he dozes. Although he’s sleeping, his lips are tense and his brow is furrowed as if the worries of the day haunt even his dreams. Moving slowly so I don’t wake him, I cuddle up against his side and stroke his hair, easing the longer strands from across his forehead. His breathing pauses momentarily, making me hold my breath, fearing I’ve woken him, but his face quickly relaxes and he seems to drift deeper into sleep.
When his breathing evens back out I whisper softly, “I may be a fool, but I think I love you, Shane McKinley.”
I tell myself it's far too soon for me to admit this to him. I’d never speak the words out loud if he was awake, embarrassed by how swiftly I’ve fallen. But something about our connection has deepened even more after today, and I can’t stop myself from confessing it to him. Even if he can’t hear me.
Especially, because he can’t hear me.
I stroke his hair once more before rolling onto my side to watch the birds on the feeder hanging from the big tree behind the house, mentally compiling a list of supplies to request from the city.