Chapter 15 Wayne
WAYNE
The spontaneous trip I went on with the guys turned out to be lackluster, as have most things in my life lately. I haven’t been able to shake the notion that I’d be having more fun if Katie were here.
Sure, that’d trash the whole idea of a dude’s-only-getaway, but fuck it. It hasn’t amounted to much on its own.
Camping was fine, but it was kind of boring without excessive amounts of liquor or enough weed to smoke the entire forest out. Aaron brought a few six packs, and that was it. For a week of camping with all four of us.
I spent half of the time out there bored and watching the leaves rustle overhead.
It was nice, I guess, but I was expecting some good old-fashioned fun. Instead, I sat and listened to my three closest friends talk about the joys of married life and fatherhood. I’ve never had less in common with a group of people before.
I even egged them into heading down to Vegas for a few days, but that was more insufferable than I thought Vegas knew how to be.
Well, to be fair, it was Vicky who was insufferable.
Apparently, Cody posted something about our plans online, and Vicky just so happened to be in town.
She was all over me, asking questions about how work was going and how much I’m making these days.
Usually I don’t mind bragging about my job if it’ll get me laid, but I have no interest in impressing my ex.
I hardly managed two minutes away from her the whole time we were there, and I was incredibly relieved to say goodbye to the strip, and her along with it.
I scroll past the near endless texts from who I can only assume is Vicky—I didn’t save her number, and I have no plans to do so. Whatever she has to say to me, I don’t want to hear it. Especially not after this weekend.
I’ve had women come onto me that I haven’t been interested in before, but they can usually take a hint. Vicky seems fucking incapable.
My heart twinges in my chest when I see that I only have two texts and one call from Katie.
I didn’t realize I wouldn’t have service while we were camping, and I just didn’t check my phone while we were in Vegas.
I expected more, I guess. Did she not miss me?
I’ve spent this whole time basically pining for her.
Was I just a fling to her? I thought we were getting closer to the territory of having something… well, maybe not serious, but at least something real. Can something be real but not serious? Either way, I thought what we had mattered, and I really thought I would hear more from her.
Maybe things will go back to how they were now that I’m back in town.
Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and all that.
Not fond enough to pick up when I call, though. The dial tone rings in my ear until Katie’s voicemail beeps at me, informing me she’s not available.
“Hey, sugar,” I say as I toss my bag into the back of my SUV. “Uh, it’s me. I’m heading back to town. Give me a call when you get this.”
I stopped off at a motel for the night, too exhausted to drive straight through, but it’s still early. If she doesn’t have much going on at work, she might not even be up yet. And if she does have a lot on her schedule, well, she’s busy.
I’m sure she’ll call me before I make it back home.
The scenery flies by as I drive, shifting from unfamiliar GPS-required roads to very familiar ones I can navigate with my eyes closed.
Even by the time I pull into the driveway of the ranch, though, my phone still hasn’t rang.
I check it after I park, anyway, part of me stupidly hopeful that I just didn’t hear it.
No notifications.
I try not to wince at the sting.
She’s probably here, anyway. I’m sure Dad is working her to the bone. She even leaves her phone in the office some days, so she probably doesn’t even have it on her. I’m sure she’ll be just as thrilled to see me as I am to see her.
I sling my bag over my shoulder before heading into the house. Jenny’s in the kitchen, nose in her coffee cup while she pores over something on her laptop.
“Welcome home.” Her words are dry and uninterested, but it’s better than the cold shoulder. “I’ve got new contracts I need you to look over.”
“Can I get settled in first?” I ask, annoyed. “Let me get my stuff set down and go say hi to Katie, at least.”
Jenny looks up from her computer at that, one thin brow arched as she rakes her gaze over me.
“Oh, so Katie’s a priority now?” she asks snidely. “Or are you just looking for excuses to fuck off again?”
I roll my eyes, too tired to fight with her properly. I’m a little surprised at the protective note in her voice, but Katie has been working on the ranch for years. It makes sense for her and Jenny to be close.
“I’m going to go out to the barn, say hello, and come back to look at your goddamn contracts,” I bite out. “Or does that not work for your schedule?”
“I hope for Katie’s sake that you can get over whatever crawled up your ass and died while you were gone.” She shakes her head in distaste and turns her attention back to her laptop. “Anyway, she’s not here today. She called out.”
Disappointment slams into me like a brick wall.
I haven’t seen her in two weeks, haven’t even heard her sweet voice through my phone. How am I supposed to wait even longer? I don’t even think before I turn back toward the front door.
“Are you seriously leaving?” Jenny calls after me.
“I’m going to go say hi to Katie,” I say, not turning to look at her. “I’ll be back after.”
I step outside and swing the door shut on her frustrated shouting.
All I can think about is seeing Katie again.
I miss everything about her, from the blush that paints her cheeks when I call her pretty, to the way her hands feel against my skin.
I want to know about what she got up to while I was gone.
I want to hear her say she missed me, too.
Pissing my sister off doesn’t matter, if it means I get to smell Katie’s perfume even a few minutes sooner.
I hop in my SUV and head straight for Katie’s place, excitement thrumming in my veins.
It would probably be sweet if I stopped to get her flowers, but I’m too impatient.
I’ll get her some tomorrow, but for now, I just want her in my arms again.
Jenny said she called out, which means she’s probably sick.
It might actually be nice to take care of her, which isn’t something I’ve ever wanted to do for someone else.
Traffic is still light this early in the morning, and I make it to her apartment before most people are even finishing their first cup of coffee.
She doesn’t answer the first time I knock. I rap my knuckles against the door harder, then try the doorbell.
Nothing.
I can hear muffled noises from inside the apartment, and her car is in its usual parking spot, but she doesn’t answer. I try one last time, putting all my force into the knock.
“Katie?” I shout through the door, hoping she can hear me. “Katie, it’s Wayne. Are you alright?”
The noises stop for a brief moment, and then I hear footsteps heading toward the door.
Good, I was starting to get worried she was seriously sick and I’d need to call an ambulance or something.
The door swings open, and instead of what I expected — Katie with a red nose, a cold, not feeling well — her look is one of pure rage.
“Who the fuck do you think you are?” Tears make a mess of her face, her eyes red and swollen from crying.
Her lips look like she’s been biting them in an attempt to stifle her sobs, and her hair sticks up at odd angles like she’s been tugging furiously at the curls.
“You’ve been gone for two fucking weeks, and you think you can just show up at my door? ”
I blink at her in shock, my excitement over seeing her dissolving into pure confusion. I tried to call her less than two hours ago. And it’s not like I… well, I guess I did leave without warning, but we’re not married or something. I don’t have to tell her my every move.
“Jenny said you called out,” I say lamely, instead of responding to her questions. “Are you sick?”
My voice sounds feeble even to my own ears, and Katie scoffs at me. She looks angrier than I’ve ever seen her.
“Fuck you,” she spits. “You don’t get to ask if I’m sick, you asshole.
I called out because everything’s a fucking mess!
You couldn’t care less about me, you just want to get your dick wet!
I’m getting fucking sued by one of my clients, Al is getting worse, and you don’t give a shit about any of it!
Go back to Billings and enjoy your pathetic life, you shitstain. And don’t ever fucking call me again.”
I don’t have a chance to digest any of that before the door slams shut in my face with a resounding thud. The dull white paint stares back at me as I try fruitlessly to figure out what I’m supposed to do.
All I can think to do is to knock again.
She ignores me.
Panic rises in my gut as I hear sobbing from the other side of the door, and I fumble for the knob. It’s locked, but I rattle it anyway, my other hand pounding on the door.
“Katie! Katie, come on, talk to me, please!” I’m sure her neighbors can hear us, but for once I don’t care about my image. I need to make sure she’s okay. That’s all that matters. “I’m sorry, okay? Let me take care of you. We can talk about this.”
A heartbroken shout of pain sounds from behind the door, but that’s all I get.
“Fuck off, Riggs.”
The words are shouted loud enough for me to hear them through the door, but they still sound weak. Shattered. They pierce straight through my chest like a spike.
My hands fall to my sides as the wind is taken out of my sails, my frustration fading to bitter fear. Is this how things are going to go now? Bouncing from one shitty situation to another? Am I never going to have somewhere I’m wanted again?
I stumble back toward my SUV as my head spins with fear and frustration and confusion.
I didn’t realize going on the trip would upset Katie this much, and I don’t understand why she won’t let me help at all.
Even if just with the lawsuit. What the hell is that about, anyway?
Katie’s the best damn vet I’ve ever seen.
Who would ever want to sue her? And Al, on top of it all…
no one’s said a word about that to me. I’ve only seen him a few times since I’ve been back, and he looks frail, but not like he’s deteriorating.
If things are that bad, why hasn’t anyone told me? Do they all just think I don’t care?
I drive back to the ranch with tears in my eyes and a floaty, uncomfortable sensation of loss in my chest. I’ve never worried about belonging somewhere before, but now that I’m home, all I can think about is how I don’t seem to belong here.
I trudge into the house after I park, hoping Jenny isn’t in the kitchen. I can’t handle another lecture right now.
It’s not Jenny that greets me when I walk in the house, but Mary. Her friendly smile wobbles when she sees the despair on my face, and she frowns in concern.
“Did you go see Katie?” I nod. “She told you, then?”
“About the lawsuit and Al and how bad I fucked up by leaving?” I ask hollowly. “Yeah. She did.”
Mary hums in response, thoughtful, but not judging. There’s something else. She’s hiding something.
“Why don’t you sit down, Wayne?” she asks, pulling a chair out at the table. “I think there might be some things you don’t quite understand about Katie.”
I resist the urge to laugh. I feel like I don’t understand anything right now. I take the seat she pulled out for me and drop down into it, boneless and overwhelmed.
“Have you ever been in a serious relationship before, Wayne?” Mary asks.
“No.” I don’t even have to think about it. The closest I’ve ever gotten was with Vicky, and that hardly counts. “I’ve never wanted to.”
“But you do now.” I nod again, not able to come up with words. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted anything the way I want Katie. Certainly nothing that wasn’t being offered to me on a silver platter.
Mary sighs. She touches my shoulder. “You’re going to have to prove that to her. She’s not just going to take your word for it.”
Hearing that out loud makes me feel like a total asshole, but I know that she’s right. I’ve been giving Katie nothing but pretty words and broken promises, and if I want anything more than that, I need to buck up and act like a man.
I need to apologize—properly apologize—and show her that I’m not playing games anymore.
It’s time to put playboy Wayne Riggs to rest, or I’m not going to get anywhere in life. Especially now that I’m realizing there’s more to life than getting laid and having fun.
“You’re right.” My voice is quiet and thready, but there’s an undercurrent of steel that makes me feel a little less hopeless. “I… thank you, Mary.”
She smiles at me, looking much older and wiser than I feel. I still sense that she’s not telling me something, but I don’t think asking will get me an answer.
“Anytime, Wayne,” she says. “Just promise you’ll take care of her.”
“I promise.”
This is a promise I’m not going to break.