36. 36
36
Honey
I was on the step ladder, stretching my arms to stick the final corner of The Honey Pot’s ‘Book of the Month’ poster when my eyes widened at an unlikely customer through the glass. I was clambering down when the bell chimed. Clyde smiled at me bustling over to him, beginning to look like the cowboy Gumtree Valley knew back in his work shirt, jeans and boots without the sling as an accessory.
‘G’day, Honey!’
‘Mr Hayes—Sorry, Clyde! I see the sling is off!’ I beamed at him although I was feeling a little nervous. I hadn’t seen him since the drama I’d caused between his sons a month ago.
He looked down at his arm, as if he, too, found it hard to believe he was free of having a wing. ‘Yeah. Got it off just this morning. Still a bit of therapy to go until she’s fully functional again, but heading in the right direction. I don’t need Beau to chauffer me around anymore after today!’
I gave a giggle. ‘You’ve lost your designated driver after a night at the pub then, eh!’
He gave a wink. ‘Too right!’
‘So what can I help you with? Or have you just come in to tell everyone in town you no longer have a broken wing?’
‘I’m after the rest of those books by Fleur McDonald. Got them in stock?’
‘I sure do!’ I bustled over to the correct area, talking over my shoulder as he followed. ‘So, bit of a rural crime junkie? Once you’ve finished these, I’m happy to introduce you to lots of other authors!’
‘I owe it to you for getting me into reading. Belinda always used to read.’ His voice had taken on a nostalgic tone laced with sadness and I paused my book stacking to face him. Colton hadn’t really spoke about his mum much. She’d died only a year before I came to Gumtree Valley. Clyde had been the one to find his wife dead in the kitchen, her car keys in hand, on her way to pick up the kids from the bus stop. ‘You and her would’ve got along like a house on fire, I reckon.’
‘A fellow bookworm? Of course I would’ve!’ I gave him a soft smile, seeing he was becoming upset with the memory of his wife and returned to pulling the books from the shelf. ‘Are you sure you want all of them? I’m happy to set some aside so you don’t blow up your card.’
‘Every year the boys have given me fifty dollars for my birthday.’ My eyes bulged over the stack of books at the wad of yellow notes he pulled from his pocket. ‘Every year I just put it in the sock drawer, not really knowing what to spend it on.’
‘Well, alright, if you’re sure!’ I made my way back to the counter, wincing at the wobble in the stack as I set them down on the countertop. ‘I feel bad asking you if there’s anything else you need but … is there anything else?’
‘Ah, you got any tourism books?’ Clyde became awkward. ‘On the US? I was thinking of surprising Colton, once the arm is better.’
‘Oh!’ I scolded my heart for sinking at the reminder of how far away he was. ‘Of course we do. Follow me down the back.’
‘You don’t sell many?’ asked Clyde, looking at the wall of informative books from all over the globe in the back corner.
I grimaced, plucking some from the shelves. ‘You know what Gumtree Valley residents are like. Once they’re settled, their next move is to the town cemetery.’ I wrung my hands. ‘How is Colton, anyway? I see his next ride is tomorrow night.’
Clyde nodded. ‘When I speak to him, he sounds happy enough. Maybe he’s just nervous, worried about racking up enough points to have a go at being at the top.’
I gave a tight smile. ‘Well, as long as he’s happy.’
Clyde went to speak, only to be cut off by another customer rattling the bell. I peeked around the corner, my eyebrows bouncing upwards when Beau’s tall and broad frame barely fit in the little shop.
‘You in ‘ere, Dad?’ He was frowning, looking around the store.
‘Sorry, I was showing him the tourist books!’ I called, making my way to the front with Clyde in tow. I returned Beau’s warm smile, glad to be back as the friendly neighbours we’d always been before our dating disaster.
‘Keep ya hat on, we’ve got plenty of time for you to get ready and come back in for your date,’ grumbled Clyde, flicking through his cash as I scanned up his tally.
I paused to give Beau a grin. ‘A date ?’
Beau murdered his father with his eyes, a soft blush creeping up his tanned neck.
‘Who is she? A local?’
‘Emma.’ Clyde looked to be gloating in his son’s embarrassment.
‘Emma? Oh! Emma ! The new vet?’ I smiled. ‘She came in just the other day. I feel like she’s going to be a loyal customer to The Honey Pot, so in that case, I approve.’
‘Good for us too! Once they’re hitched, free vet checks!’ Clyde passed me the correct change and I tucked it into the till with a giggle.
‘Jesus, Dad!’ muttered Beau. He gave me a sheepish smile. ‘Sorry, Honey. We haven’t even been on our first date yet and he’s already planning the wedding.’
I waved him off. ‘No bother! I just hope it works out. God knows this town could use a successful love story,’ I said honestly, carefully packing Clyde’s books into bags.
‘Well, if you and—’
‘Besides,’ I quickly said. ‘Aren’t you excited about everyone fawning over you after surviving the town heart breaker?’ I pushed the bags towards them, leaning on the counter with a grin.
Beau chuckled, shaking his head, picking up one of the loaded paper bags from the counter while Clyde took the other. ‘You’re far from a wicked witch, Honey. Anyway, we better get moving. Catch ya!’
I waved them off, my smile fading when the ding of the bell meant I was alone with my thoughts again. I looked down at Duke, giving him a loving pat before returning to the front window and pulling down the old posters. In the month that he’d been gone, I was barely able to free my mind of Colton for a day. Especially that night at View Point, which had painstakingly replayed itself in the late hours of the night over and over. I yearned for him, more than I ever had when he left the first time. Back then, I had anger and hate to help me push thoughts of him aside. When I’d caved to my feelings at View Point, I’d seen it as gaining closure. Finally, we had a peaceful goodbye as he’d driven away at sunrise. That part of my life was over. I could move on. But of course, it hadn’t worked like that. His touch, which I’d worked hard to forget for seven years, was rebranded and burning hot. There was no anger this time to make it easier. I missed him immensely; from his cheeky grin to his dusty boots. My heart ached and there was nothing I could do about it but push through with every passing day.
A stupid part of me had hoped that maybe when we’d woken in each other’s arms in the tray of his ute at sunrise that he’d change his mind. I knew he was afraid to stay. Scared of hurting me again and ruining the relationships with people he’d only just gotten back. A part of me had been too. Things were so good, was it worth risking it over a passionate night? But then he’d kissed me goodbye, leaving me to watch his ute disappear from sight with Duke. I had dreams of him coming back, either galloping across paddocks to see me or surprising me at The Honey Pot. I wondered if he was tempted to come back. But it’d been a month. If he’d wanted to, he would’ve by now.
I had to toughen up and move on. I knew I would get over him some day. I would find love with someone else without comparing it to the years I spent with Colton. I had to believe I would.
Ellie-May gave me a wave from where she walked past the display window before coming inside. I was smiling widely, meeting her in a tight hug. The days we spent together had been less since she began getting ready for her big move overseas. I was sad to lose the time I loved with her so much, but I refused to be bitter with jealousy. I wouldn’t tarnish her happiness by letting her see how hard it was for me to lose her when it felt like I’d lost so much already.
***
Our meals had been ordered and our drinks sweated into the coasters beneath them as we sat at the same table we’d sat at the night we’d brought Kimberley Sparks. The night my jealous arse had made a drunken fool of myself.
Ellie-May picked at the coaster her drink sat on like it was the most interesting thing to exist.
‘Spit it out.’
She began chewing her lip, making her ring move. ‘I’m leaving earlier than originally planned.’
I blinked. ‘Oh?’
The statement hung in the air as our meals were put in front of us. I eyed the chicken parmi loaded with ham and cheese. I suddenly wasn’t hungry. I picked a salted chip and chewed it slowly.
‘The company I have my work visa with wants me over there as soon as possible due to staff shortages.’ Ellie-May was rushing and I could tell my reaction was making her nervous.
‘Yeah, no, makes sense.’ I stabbed into my garden salad. ‘So when are you leaving?’
‘Next week,’ said Ellie-May with a grimace.
I coughed, a piece of spinach shooting down my throat before I could chew and I snatched for my lemonade.
‘I know it’s soon—real soon,’ rushed Ellie-May as I chugged. ‘But I know you’re going through a tough time right now and I won’t leave my best friend unless she tells me to.’
I looked at Ellie-May, my bestest friend for so many years. Living in Gumtree Valley without her was a terrifying thought. She’d been the one to take me under her wing and had been my ride or die since then. We’d been through so much together. I knew I could always call her and we would be at each other’s houses within the hour. I wouldn’t have gotten through Colton leaving me, the miscarriage and turbulent relationship with Beau without her. I’d grown to depend on Ellie-May more than I liked to admit. Just like I’d relied on Colton to be my sole source of happiness. Then after the miscarriage, I’d pieced myself together and gone off to uni with Ellie-May’s unwavering support. I’d had my adventure in the city for three years before coming home to settle. This was her adventure. I wouldn’t be the miserable single friend to take that away from her.
‘Well, then,’ I sighed, pausing dramatically with the enjoyment of watching her squirm. ‘I guess we should start planning a going away party!’