Chapter Sixty-One
Chapter
Sixty-One
Beulah
Chantel walked into the room carrying bottles of Grey Goose, Makers Mark, and club soda. She sat them on the table and went back for the glasses. I stood there watching Shay open the boxes, then take out a chocolate pastry, and eat it. “Sit. Relax, bitch. Don’t stand there nervous, he’s not here. This is what he gets for running off.”
Shay sank onto the sofa and propped her feet up on the coffee table. Stone’s furniture was expensive. Sitting on it made me uncomfortable. But there was no asking her to remove her feet from the furniture—she was doing what she wanted.
When Chantel returned with glasses and ice, Shay pointed at the vodka. “Fix her something, please. She’s so uptight she can’t sit.”
I slowly bent my knees and sat on the rug beneath me. I couldn’t bring myself to drink and eat on his furniture.
Shay rolled her eyes at me and Chantel handed me a vodka soda. “Drink up,” she said cheerily.
I wrapped my hands around the cold glass and looked at it for only a second before taking a long swig. Shay was right. I was uptight and needed to relax.
Shay clapped. “Bravo! Now eat a sandwich or ten. They’re tiny as hell.” Shay glanced over at Chantel. “You could use ten or so sandwiches yourself.”
Chantel plopped on the sofa and curled her legs underneath her. It was impressive, considering she had legs as long as most people were tall. “I’m drinking my calories,” she replied. “Did you get in touch with Fiona? Is she coming?”
Shay reached for the Makers Mark bottle and poured a neat glass for herself. “She’s on a date. New guy.”
“Ah, Bruno. I forgot about that,” Chantel said thoughtfully.
“His name is Bruno?” Shay sounded amused. I had to agree the name was interesting.
“Yep. He’s a schoolteacher. High school algebra. She met him getting coffee.”
I couldn’t imagine Fiona with a teacher. She seemed too glamorous, but the juxtaposition made me smile. Or it was the vodka making me smile. The bite of donut was not soaking up the little bit of vodka I had consumed. I leaned back against the sofa and pulled my knees up, resting my drink on my right knee while I ate the rest of my donut with my left hand.
“Jasper showed up, and there was yelling. You ended up being intercepted by Fiona at Stone’s request. Stone left you a letter the following morning, and now he’s gone, and you’re here. That’s the summary I got. Do you want to talk about it?” Shay stuffed a tiny sandwich in her mouth.
I thought for a moment, then tilted my head. “No. I would rather forget.”
“Fair enough,” Chantel said. “Let’s talk about what you’re planning to do next.”
Talking that through wasn’t a bad idea. I had no one else to talk to and needed to figure things out. I sipped more of my drink and licked the sugar from my finger left by the donut before responding. “I think I’ll find an apartment outside of town. Rent is more affordable there. If I don’t keep my job with Geraldine, I will have to find work elsewhere. I’ve been putting money away, so I should be good for a few weeks.”
Chantel sighed. “Damn. I was hoping you’d stay and fight with him. He needs to have a fucking reaction to something instead of not giving a shit. I get so tired of that bored expression of his.”
“He’s been good to me and helped me when I was completely lost. I don’t know why he left, really. Unless I was asking for explanations for more than he wanted to tell me. In the end, it was his choice. Regardless, I can’t stay here and force him to stay away.”
“I don’t see why not. We like you better.” Shay smiled at me while she chewed the sandwich she just popped into her mouth.
They didn’t really know Stone. I assume that no one did—not even me. He was hard to get close to, but no matter his mistakes, I knew the goodness in him. Even if he had some twisted issues resulting from an abusive childhood. There was a kindness inside him.
“You haven’t seen him with Geraldine. I can’t describe the way he takes care of her, but he’s always there when she needs him. I know he loves her. He also went out of his way to help Jasper when he didn’t deserve it. Stone’s got a good heart. He’s just careful with people. There’s a lot of hurt and damage in his past.”
Chantel poured herself more vodka. “He’s an idiot. You see all that when no one else can see past the elitist, detached expression he always wears on his gorgeous face. He should have kept you. He needed to keep you. All the other women in his life were with him for this,” she held her hands out as if the room was why they were with him. “All the shit he has. His money. His name. And, of course, his talent in the sack.” She winced and gave me a sad smile. “Sorry. But I’ve heard the talk.”
Shay snorted. “Sure you have.”
I didn’t want to know if Chantel had slept with Stone. That was the last thing I needed to picture. Her perfect body was intimidating. “Don’t be a bitch,” Chantel said to Shay.
Shay shut up, and I was relieved. Then I drank some more. As the liquid started working its magic, my body began to feel loose and warm. I laid my head back on the sofa behind me and sighed.
“He is rather amazing. I didn’t have much experience with sex before him, but even I knew that wasn’t normal. It was earth-shattering.” My tongue had started wagging of its own free will, apparently. I didn’t care. It was true.
“And the vodka has taken effect just that quickly. Give her another donut.” Shay laughed.
Before I could say anything else, a donut was in my hand. I didn’t even look at it as I stuffed a bite in my mouth and chewed, smiling. The donuts were good. Calories and Chantel’s perfect butt didn’t seem important anymore. I’d rather eat the sugary goodness than have her body. At least right now. Tomorrow morning, I would likely feel differently. That thought made me laugh.
Opening my eyes, I studied the chandelier’s twinkling lights above us. It probably cost more money than I had made in my short life. It was beautiful. Elegant. “Do you think Stone has ever studied that chandelier before? Like really appreciated how pretty it is when the lights are on and all the crystals glitter.”
“Uh, no. Unless he has been sitting where you are drunk off his ass,” Shay replied.
“It really is something. Do y’all think Marty and Fiona will ever hook up again?” Chantel changed the subject, and I turned my head to look up at her on the sofa. She was fixated on the chandelier lights now.
“I think they still fuck regularly,” Shay replied.
Chantel gasped. “Really?”
“Yup.”
“I guess my asking him out is a bad idea then.” She sounded disappointed.
Shay shrugged. “Not my business.”
We all sat in silence for a few minutes. My thoughts were on Stone. Chantel’s were on Marty, and I wasn’t sure who Shay was thinking about. I drank more, and with each sip, I felt life become easier. Like I was floating on a happy cloud.
“I keep having sex with Mack,” Shay blurted out.
I couldn’t say I was surprised by this. “Good.” My response was heartfelt, even though it might not have sounded that way.
“Everyone already knows that,” was Chantel’s response.
“Damn,” Shay muttered.
I started giggling. Chantel joined me, and Shay laughed out loud with the two of us. Our laughter got louder as the world suddenly became hilarious. The more we saw each other laugh, the funnier it seemed. My side hurt from laughing. Tears were rolling down my face, and I was okay—at least for now. I would have to face the pain again. But tonight, it felt great to laugh in the face of everything that had happened.
I woke up to misery, but it wasn’t the kind I had expected. My hands gripped the edge of the toilet as I heaved for the third time. A cold sweat covered my body. I sank onto my knees and dropped my head into my hands once I was finished. I would never drink alcohol again.
Laughter coming from outside the door couldn’t even get my attention. I didn’t want to move. My head was pounding so badly that if I did move, I’d likely end up hanging my head over the toilet again.
“Lightweight, you should have eaten more.” Shay’s all too chipper voice was annoying. How was she not hanging over a toilet? She drank more than the three of us combined. I would ask her if I could speak and not revive my nausea. But even that was difficult. “Here,” a cold, wet washcloth appeared in front of me. “Use that and spread out on the floor. I’ll bring you some water.”
I took the cloth and covered my face, laying on the floor like she suggested. This was like a terrible stomach virus. However, I’d caused it. At least with a stomach virus, you were an innocent victim. It was impossible to feel sorry for myself when the horrid state I was in was my fault.
I couldn’t remember what Stone’s living room looked like or how much of his alcohol we drank. When I could move again, I needed to clean up and restock his bar. Leaving here was inevitable, but I wouldn’t leave without making sure it was just as he left it. The ache in my chest was there under all the awful sickness. Now, it was just worse. I was sick and broken.
“Ouch, you look worse than me,” Chantel said. “And I thought I was in bad shape.” I tried to tilt my head back to look up at her, but even that was too much movement. I grunted instead.
“It was fun. Worth the pain. Might not feel like it right now, but you’ll appreciate it once you are up and living again. I’ve got to go workout. See you later.”
I attempted to nod and listened as her footsteps faded. The idea of her morning workout made me want to throw up again. How could she do anything physical after last night? I must have drunk more than she did.
Footsteps approached. Shay called out to Chantel about taking the trash with her.
“Sit up and drink this.” Shay squatted beside me and handed over a glass of water.
“I can’t,” I moaned.
“You need water to feel better. Come on, you can do this.”
I disagreed. I know I couldn’t stay on the bathroom floor all day, either. I had to get up and move on with my life. That was the one thing we all agreed on last night. It was also one of the last things I remembered clearly. No, the last thing I remembered was the three of us dancing on the balcony. Groaning loudly, I got on all fours and shifted into a sitting position.
“You remind me of a zombie on The Walking Dead ,” Shay said, laughing.
I felt like a zombie, too. Reaching for the glass of water, I took a small sip. And another. I had to close my eyes to ease the pounding in my head.
“Why?” I asked. “Why did I do this?”
“Because it was fun. And for a small window of time, you forgot. You laughed and danced. We worked out your plans for the future. Although I’m rethinking the move to Spain to nanny for a wealthy widower. That sounded good when we were drinking, but now not so much. The language barrier could be your first problem.”
I had forgotten that conversation. “Why did we pick Spain?” I asked, wincing at the sound of my voice.
“I think you said the men there were better looking than French men. I had suggested France.”
“Oh.” That must have made sense last night—not so much now.
“I can show you the apartment complex where I lived for a year. It is affordable, and you’ll feel safe there.” I vaguely remember Shay mentioning her previous apartment last night. Perhaps her place was better than the one I’d found.
“I need to clean up here and restock the bar. You can show me the complex afterward if you are available then.” I drank more, attempting to get myself together. An all-day hangover was not an option.
“Our party area is already cleaned up. We can buy replacement alcohol while we’re out.”
“Okay,” I nodded. “Thanks for cleaning up.”
She shrugged. “It was my idea to drink and eat here. I’m heading to my apartment to take a shower and get dressed. If you feel like eating, I left you snacks in the kitchen. We didn’t eat everything last night. Eat something, you’ll feel better.”
I wasn’t sure I believed that, but I nodded. Wait. Heidi. I’d forgotten. I was supposed to bring her pancakes today. Due to my hangover from hell, I was already late getting going today. And I was running out of time.
“I have to make pancakes for my sister. I need to do that first.” It took all my strength, but I stood up. I had too much to do and needed to snap out of it fast.
“There are enough pastries and crap left over in the kitchen. You want to take that to her?”
I dismissed her suggestion. “No. She wants special pancakes. I’ll have to make them.” I shuffled out of the bathroom and went to the kitchen to force a sandwich down my throat, hoping it would magically cure me.
The front door opened before I reached the kitchen, and I froze. I knew before I looked back toward the entrance that it was him. I didn’t expect Stone back so soon but there was no one else it could be. Our awkwardness with Shay here to witness was the last thing I wanted to face this morning.
When I finally turned, our eyes locked. The sight of his unshaven face and dark gaze warmed me. The cold that had seeped in from his absence lifted. Seeing him made it easier to breathe. Even if the hurt remained.
“Are you sick?” He studied me closely.
“Nope. Hungover, thanks to me.” Shay waltzed down the hallway toward him.
Stone barely glanced at Shay before returning his focus to me. “Where did you go?”
“Chill. Jesus,” Shay drawled. “I didn’t take her out partying. We drank right here in your humble abode. It should be noted she was forced. I had to call in an assist from Chantel to talk her into it. She wouldn’t even sit on your damn furniture to eat until she was too smashed to remember.”
Stone looked relieved instead of angry.
“I’ll leave you two alone. Looks like you have shit you need to say.” Shay stood in front of him and put one hand on her hip. “I think you’re a bastard. Just so you know.”
I paled. I didn’t like her calling him that, but I never imagined she would say it to his face. “And I owe you a bottle of Makers Mark and Goose.” On that last note, she walked out.
After the door closed behind Shay, Stone didn’t move. He was watching me and didn’t say a word.
“I was going to get dressed and move my things out today. I didn’t know you’d be back.”
“We need to talk,” he replied.
Yes, we needed to talk. We needed to talk the other night when he walked away without a word.
My throat and mouth were frozen. I had no response. I could only stand there waiting for him to say more.
“Where did you plan to go?” He sounded stoic.
My new home wasn’t his business. I wanted to shrug and walk away but also stay close to him a little longer. I wanted to absorb every detail of his face, memorize him.
He sighed when I said nothing. I fought the urge to tell him my plans and stood my ground.
I realized Stone was a mystery and that I would never really know him. It didn’t stop me from fearing he’d always be in my head, my heart, and my soul.