13. Becca
13
BECCA
B ecca stood by her desk the next afternoon, looking over her class, which now had one extra child, with satisfaction.
Nick and Cal were seated beside each other in the front row. While she was certain that Mrs. Staley had been telling the truth about Nick’s energy, Becca could tell that he was trying to behave well today.
She wasn’t sure if it was just the new experience of being in a different classroom, if his dad had warned him to be good, or if being near his twin really did have a calming influence. But she was grateful that he had paid attention today and he had certainly done well in class, putting himself right to work each time she asked the class to write something down, rather than leaving his papers blank, as Mrs. Staley had warned her he might do.
Glancing down at his math quiz as she collected papers, it actually looked like he’d gotten quite a few problems correct. She couldn’t wait to take a closer look.
And all day long, Cal had been more confident and happier than she had ever seen him. Even now he was sitting up straighter and stealing glances at Aubrey Jensen.
We did it, she thought to herself happily. Things are better for both of them. And the class doesn’t seem disrupted at all.
In fact, the children had moved through their work so smoothly throughout the day that she was rewarding them now with ten minutes to work on holiday cards for their families before the final bell.
On her first day, she had brought in the colored paper, stickers, glitter, glue sticks, and other supplies for the children to use for cards. It turned out to be a big hit. The kids were so excited each time they got to spend a few minutes on the quiet project. She even heard them whisper to each other to pay attention at times throughout the day, clearly hoping to be rewarded with free time at the end.
Her budget didn’t stretch to buying as many extras out of her pocket as she would have liked. But the art supplies for cards had been a really wonderful investment, and she was glad she had splurged on them.
The afternoon sun glittered on the snow outside and she enjoyed the soft sounds of scissors snipping and children murmuring to each other as they passed around the sticker bin.
Teaching wasn’t exactly a peaceful activity. It required a vigilant eye and a ton of stamina. But moments like these were priceless and brought her a deep sense of satisfaction. After all, children couldn’t be calm like this until they had spent their energy on the playground and exercised their minds on their schoolwork.
Her timer went off, and she tried not to smile when she heard a few sighs of disappointment.
“What a wonderful day we had,” she told the children, meaning it. “Let’s clean up so we can be ready when the bell rings. The faster we get cleaned up today, the less time we have to save for clean-up next time. Let’s see if we can beat yesterday’s record.”
She set the stopwatch feature on her phone and the kids sprang into action. Every second grader loved the idea of beating a record.
“May I use the broom and dustpan?” a bright voice asked.
She glanced down to see Nick looking up at her.
“That would be lovely,” she told him. “And I’m sure Mr. Arnold will appreciate not having to clean up glitter from the floor.”
Nick’s little chest puffed up and he looked so pleased. All the children adored Mr. Arnold, who had nicknames for everyone, and kept on top of all the latest toys and trends with the help of his beloved grandchildren.
In no time, the classroom was neat as a pin again, and when the bell rang, most of them managed to gather their things calmly, something she was working on with them. Nearly all the children politely said goodbye to her as they left, instead of just darting off down the hall.
She stepped in the hallway to see them off, feeling proud of another day with her very own class. When the last student was gone, she headed back into her classroom to begin what she thought of as her second shift
“Becca,” a familiar voice called out from the doorway almost immediately.
“Hi Emily,” she said with a smile.
“Want to grab a slice of pizza?” Emily asked hopefully.
“I’ve got papers to grade,” Becca told her. “But have fun.”
“It’s Friday,” Emily moaned. “Can’t you get away on Friday night? We have the whole weekend for grading and plans. And it’s your first week.”
“I wish I could,” Becca told her, meaning it. The mere idea had her stomach grumbling, and she loved the idea of a chance to socialize. But that pizza place looked awfully fancy, and her first paycheck wouldn’t hit her bank account for a while yet.
“Maybe over the weekend?” Emily offered.
“I’ve got a pretty busy weekend,” Becca told her, gesturing to the chalkboard, which still held sample sentences from the past, present, and future lesson she’d taught today. Her examples included her past visit to the Lawrence dairy farm, her current activities in the classroom, and her future plans to visit the eye doctor’s office and the print shop for the project over the weekend, and then go iceskating. She was excited to read what the kids had written. It would be another great way to get to know them all better.
But Emily was clearly disappointed, and Becca didn’t want to seem rude.
“How about after the holidays?” Becca offered. “You can come to my place, and I’ll cook for you.”
“How can I say no to that?” Emily laughed. “I’ll tell the other girls you can’t make it.”
“Invite them for after the holidays, too,” Becca told her. “Make sure they like the idea of a big spaghetti dinner.”
“I’m going to go on record that they love the idea,” Emily told her with a warm smile. “See you Monday.”
“See you then,” Becca said, feeling happy.
Two hours later, Becca was still too keyed up from grading papers to pack up her bag and head home.
Smiling and pacing from one side of the classroom to the other, she thought again about Nick’s math quiz and felt like her whole chest was a bottle of cream soda and someone had given it a quick shake.
Mrs. Staley had said that Nick didn’t try, and that Becca would be lucky to get him to write more than his name on most quizzes.
But Nick hadn’t just attempted to answer each question. He had answered them all correctly .
It was so miraculous that she almost couldn’t believe it. But Nick had been sitting right there in the front row, and she had watched him take the quiz herself, feeling proud at the time just to see him focused on his paper.
A burst of excitement went through her again and she suddenly realized she couldn’t stay in the classroom any longer. She organized the papers on her desk, putting all but two into a folder, and sliding those two into her bag.
Becca cleaned the board quickly, then grabbed her bag and coat and headed out before she could change her mind. As she hurried through the empty hallway and down the stairs, the only light she saw on was in the office, where Principal Chittenden was surely making plans for next week.
“Have a nice weekend, Miss Hawthorne,” Mr. Arnold called to her from the other end of the hall as she headed for the front doors.
“You too,” she told him, pleased that he already knew her name, and hoping it wasn’t because her classroom was untidy. She really did try her best to leave things more or less clean.
By the time she was pushing open one of the big glass doors to get outside, the frigid blast of wintry air felt good against her cheeks, and she found she was happy to see that the sky was a gray swirl of clouds that looked suspiciously like snow.
As long as it didn’t come before she did what she was planning to do, she loved the idea of more snow. Maybe it was the kids’ influence on her, but the idea of snowflakes drifting down made her smile.
She had walked to school, so she had to walk back to her apartment to get her car. And even in the cold, it was a beautiful walk through town. Every day there were more holiday decorations up. Today, workers were doing maintenance on the pop-up ice-skating rink. They smiled and laughed as they called out to each other, as if even they couldn’t resist the joyful spirit of the little town.
Becca could hardly blame them. Back in the city, she had always enjoyed the holiday lights and celebrations. But so much of the Christmas finery there felt like it was aimed at trying to sell something.
Here in Sugarville Grove, it was different. Even in the shop windows, there were posters for fun community activities and charity projects. And real greenery hung from the railings and window boxes, like something out of an old-fashioned children’s book. It made her want to hang decorations herself, though she lived in a third-floor apartment, so she wouldn’t be hanging outdoor lights anytime soon.
When she reached her car, she hopped right in instead of heading upstairs to change, figuring it was better to go in her school clothes than to waste any more time, or give herself an excuse not to go back out. She was wearing a long skirt and low heels today, nothing that felt overly formal.
The old car started up on the first try, and she shivered and blew out an impatient breath, trying to let it warm up a little before pulling out and heading out of the village and up Fox Hollow Road.
Should I be doing this?
As she traveled farther into the countryside and away from the town, she swore she could feel Zane’s quiet presence. Maybe he preferred to leave the village in the village for the weekend. Would he even want to see her?
Nick will , she told herself as she pictured the little boy’s face filled with pride as he handed her the quiz. He shouldn’t have to wait until Monday.
She slowed down as she approached the old, covered bridge. It was only one lane, and when she came out here for the first time earlier in the week she had been so scared to drive into it she’d almost turned around.
This time, she paused and waited long enough that she was pretty sure she would have heard another car’s engine.
The boards clattered under her tires as she pulled into the darkness. Fortunately, she could already see the light on the other side, and the journey across the bridge was done almost before it had begun.
Before long, she spotted the long, tree-lined drive leading to the Lawrence Farm. As she pulled in, she tried to imagine how lush it must be in the summertime under a canopy of leaves. Or how beautiful the trees would look in the fall. Even now, the silvery branches made her feel like she was entering some kind of fairyland.
Last time she visited, they had met her by her car, but this time she figured she would have to walk over to the big blue house the boys had said was theirs.
So she was surprised when she saw a group of people hanging colorful lights on the little trees and bushes in front of the boys’ grandparents’ house as the sun dipped toward the mountains behind them. A closer look told her it was Zane and the boys as well as his parents.
The adults simply turned and looked, but Nick and Cal immediately started jumping up and down and pointing. She felt a little jolt of self-consciousness as she carefully parked the car. But she couldn’t turn back now. When she opened her door to get out, the boys were already halfway to her.
“ Miss Hawthorne ,” they yelled together.
“What are you doing here?” Nick asked, chuckling with delight.
“Hey there,” Zane called to her as he followed after the boys. His deep voice was casual and curious, not the least bit suspicious, and she instantly felt a little better.
“I, um, I wanted to share something with you,” she told them. “Something good from class today.”
“Goodness, isn’t that lovely?” Maggie said, approaching with a smile. “How many teachers would come all the way up here to talk about class on a Friday afternoon.”
“Come on,” Zane told her. “Let’s go inside where it’s warm.”
She followed him, smiling when Nick wrapped a hand around her arm like he wanted to drag her faster.
“You brought your school things,” Cal said, eyeing her bag shyly.
“I wanted your family to see something good you guys did today,” she said.
“That’s evidence,” Nick pointed out, nodding sagely.
She nodded back, wondering where he had picked up that concept.
Daniel reached the front door first and opened it for everyone, letting out a lovely draft of warm air. As Becca followed everyone in, she couldn’t help admiring the Christmas tree twinkling in the living room. The family had clearly been busy over the last few days.
“Can I take your coat?” Maggie offered. “Would you like a nice cup of tea?”
“Oh, no, I’m fine,” Becca told her. “Really, I just wanted to show you all something.”
She slid her hand into her open bag and pulled out the boys’ quizzes right there in the hall. She had thought ahead of time about how to handle this, so she was prepared.
“Boys,” she said. “Is it okay with you if I share your quizzes with the family?”
They both nodded solemnly.
Zane frowned, and she didn’t blame him for being a little worried, since Nick’s grades were normally not so great compared to Cal’s. But he nodded for her to proceed.
He trusts me, she realized.
“Okay, great,” she said. “Here is Cal’s math quiz. Cal did a such great job and I’m so proud of him for always carefully lining up the numbers so that it’s easier not to make a mistake.”
Cal beamed and then glanced worriedly over at his brother.
“And here’s Nick’s math quiz,” she said, revealing it. “Nick, you did an amazing job too. You didn’t make a single mistake with carrying, or with anything else.”
She couldn’t help noticing that Nick didn’t look surprised. But he did look like he was lit up with pride from within. And Cal looked like he would burst with happiness for his twin.
“Nicholas,” Maggie exclaimed. “Look at that.”
“Way to go, young man,” Daniel said, patting him on the back.
“Nick,” Zane said softly, bending to face his son. “Nick, I’m so proud of you.”
Nick wrapped his arms around his dad’s neck and Cal piled on too. Becca found herself tearing up at the sight.
“Looks like our new schoolteacher is getting off on the right foot,” Maggie said, wrapping an arm around her and squeezing.
“Want to hang some Christmas lights with us, Miss Hawthorne?” Nick asked excitedly, breaking away from his dad’s embrace to dart over to her.
“Yes,” Cal added. “Yes, yes, yes. You have to.”
“Oh,” she said, surprised. “I don’t want to take up any more of your time. I just didn’t want the boys to have to wait all weekend for such good news.”
“Nonsense,” Daniel insisted with a big smile. “You’re welcome to come by any time. But don’t be surprised if you get roped into some chores now and then.”
“Well,” Becca admitted. “I was actually just thinking about how I’d love to hang some lights outside, but my apartment is on the third floor.”
“You’ll need a big ladder for that, Miss Hawthorne,” Cal told her seriously, as Daniel chuckled.
“Come on then, Miss Schoolteacher,” Maggie said. “We’ll put you right to work.”
“Not in those shoes, you won’t,” Daniel said. “Put on my galoshes, young lady.”
“Thank you,” she said gratefully. She would have gone out happily without them, but she didn’t exactly have the budget for another pair of work shoes.
The boys headed out the door and scampered down the steps as she and Zane followed behind them.
“Thank you for coming all the way up here,” he told her. “You didn’t have to do that, but it means a lot.”
“I thought we could all use the encouragement,” she told him. “You took a big risk this week and put a lot of time and trouble into getting Nick into class with his brother. I wanted you to know right away that it was a good decision. And I think Cal had a good day today too.”
“He was telling me,” Zane said with a smile. “He couldn’t stop talking about all the things you all did in class and everyone he played with at recess.”
“I’m so glad the change is working out for them both so far,” she told him. “We might have rough patches when the newness wears off. But they’re good boys. And I know they want to be good students and classmates.”
“That’s nice,” he said quietly. “How you see the best in them.”
“A person would have to be blind not to see the best in those boys,” she said, her eyes on the two little blond heads in front of them, leaning together as they examined the string of lights they had been working on.
Zane didn’t respond, and when she looked up at him he was gazing back down at her with an expression she hadn’t seen on him before.
“Come on, Miss Hawthorne,” Cal called out suddenly. “You can use the ladder.”
“It’s only a small ladder,” Nick said, in a disappointed way. “But this isn’t a very big tree.”
Becca laughed and jogged over to join them, figuring she could try to piece together the look their father had been giving her later.
“Dad is already very tall,” Cal said. “So if you stand on a ladder on this side, he can go on the other side, and you can pass the lights back and forth. Okay?”
“Okay,” she told them.
“I’ll hold the ladder while you climb up,” Nick told her. “That’s called spotting.”
“Thank you, Nick,” she told him.
Zane had jogged down from the porch now too, and he let Cal lead him to the other side of the tree.
Taking a deep breath, Becca climbed up the ladder. She only had to go up a few rungs, and it was a sturdy A-frame ladder set up on the snowy ground. But she had never exactly been much of a ladder climber, so she was a little shaky at first.
“Yes,” Nick yelled out when she was up high enough to reach the string of lights Zane was handing her.
Smiling, she took it and did her best to guide it nicely through the branches, tucking it over one and under another before handing it back to Zane.
They continued their work cheerfully. The boys scampering around and yelling out encouragement as they slowly worked their way around the little tree. Before long, she had to go up another rung, and then another, but once she knew the ladder wasn’t going anywhere, she wasn’t so scared.
“Boys, your grandpa and I are making some hot cocoa,” Maggie called from the front door a little while later.
“I want to help,” Nick yelled.
“Me too,” Cal added. “Especially with the marshmallows.”
“We’ll be fine, boys,” Zane said, chuckling. “Go on in. We’re almost done here.”
The twins scrambled into the house after their grandmother, leaving Becca outside alone with Zane and the chickadees chirping around the bird feeder by the big front window as the setting sun painted the edges of the waiting snow clouds a brilliant pink.
“Is this okay with you?” Zane asked. “I’m sure you have plenty to do.”
“This is amazing,” she told him. “It’s exactly what I wanted to do tonight. I was telling the boys the truth.”
“That’s really nice,” he said, bringing the strand of lights back to her.
She had to climb up one more rung to thread them through the branches.
“I think that might be it for this side,” she told him.
“Yeah,” he said from the other side. “This was just right. Want to stay up there while I plug it in—just to make sure we don’t have to change out any bulbs?”
“Sure,” she said, feeling excited to see the tree light up as Zane jogged over to the house and bent down.
Suddenly, the little tree was illuminated—tiny red, green, gold, and blue lights elevating it from a simple yard tree to a beautiful Christmas display in front of her eyes.
“ Oh ,” she sighed happily. “It’s beautiful.”
“Looks like the bulbs are in good shape too,” Zane said.
“Thank you,” she said, suddenly feeling a little emotional, and wishing she could find the words to tell him how much this meant. “Thank you for letting me help, and thank you for letting me teach your sweet boys.”
“Hang on,” he said gruffly. “I’ll spot you.”
He grabbed the ladder and held tight enough that she felt safe easing her way down the rungs until she reached the ground.
She turned to find him still holding the ladder, leaving her practically encircled by his big arms as he gazed into her eyes, wearing that same expression as before.
If she didn’t know better she would have said it was wonder —but a strapping cowboy like Zane Lawrence had probably spent his whole life beating off pretty girls with a stick. Why would he look at a plain little schoolteacher like Becca with anything like wonder ?
But somehow, she was breathless. The pretty lights on the tree lit up the strong planes of his jaw and cast the snow all around them in pinks and blues, like they were in a magical snow globe.
A hint of pain flashed in his eyes, and then he bent as if to kiss her, but paused just before their lips touched.
“Becca,” he whispered.
Their faces were so close. It felt like there was nothing and no one in the world but Zane Lawrence, the breath they shared, and the longing in his dark eyes.
And when his big hand moved to cup her cheek as he gazed into her eyes, his warmth was more intimate than any kiss.
The sound of the front door opening had her gasping in a breath and scrambling backwards up the ladder as Zane’s hand fell away from her cheek.
“Hot cocoa is ready,” Daniel called out softly from the porch, a smile in his voice.
Thank God it wasn’t the boys who saw us like that, she thought to herself, feeling ashamed. How could she be only a single week into her first real teaching job and already making a fool of herself over a parent?
“Sorry,” Zane said, his deep voice interrupting her train of thought.
“You were just trying to help me down,” she chattered nervously, knowing full well that wasn’t what had been happening.
“Sure,” he said, his voice a little more distant now.
“I’m fine though,” she said, scrambling off the ladder. “See? It’s really not a very big ladder.”
“Miss Hawthorne,” Cal yelled from the doorway. “I made you a hot chocolate.”
“And I put marshmallows in it,” Nick added rapturously.
“I hope you like lots of marshmallows,” Maggie said from over their shoulders, smiling at her worriedly.
Get it together, Becca told herself. It wasn’t a kiss. It was just an almost-kiss. You can’t get fired for those.
Probably.
“Is it okay for me to come in?” she asked, turning to Zane, who stood behind her scowling.
“Of course,” he said, the scowl disappearing. “That would be great.”
She smiled up at him, relieved that they hadn’t necessarily ruined the tenuous friendship they were building with a single awkward moment.
I need a friend a lot more than I need romance right now, she thought to herself as they headed into the house.
But somehow, even with the sweet chocolate and the happy chatter of the family all around, she couldn’t get that lost look in his dark eyes out of her mind.