Chapter Seventeen #2
When Logan took her untouched glass, she didn’t resist. When he leaned over and kissed her, she closed her eyes to better experience the kiss.
His arms brought her up against his strength and molded her softer body against his hard one.
Deepening the kiss, he gave her no time to think.
She could only feel the exquisite sensations that pulsed through her with his touch.
Her arms encircled his neck and she pressed herself against him. Feeling daring and brave, she threaded her fingers in his thick hair and responded to the passion that clamored to be released.
When his lips left hers to trail damp kisses across her cheek, down her neck, she shivered.
But was it heat or cold that trapped her body?
Icy fire trails followed his every caress and Emma followed each touch in her mind.
Her hands kneaded his shoulders, moved to trace the strong line of his chest. His followed a like trail, coming around to cup one full breast.
She felt warm and cherished, hot and bothered, and craved more touch than a soft caress through her dress.
“Stay,” Logan whispered in her ear, his tongue tracing the outline, his breath causing shivers of delight.
“I can’t,” she replied, knowing she wanted to.
What held her back? Slowly she turned her face and found his, staring deeply into his green eyes, wishing the light was off and they could see by moonlight.
“I really have to go,” she said, turning and almost running from the room.
“Lily, wait,” he called.
She dared not.
She could not lead him on any more without telling him the truth. If he was truly falling in love, he’d understand. At least she hoped he would.
There would be questions galore, she knew. She should have insisted he listen last night. Should have told him the entire story, and explained why she’d wanted to live life like Lily for a while.
Letting herself out, she quickly ran across the dew-damp grass. Opening the kitchen door, she stopped suddenly.
“I wondered where you were,” Lily said, smiling broadly.
“Oh. Lily, I didn’t know you were coming home today.”
I caught an earlier flight. I’ve only been home a short time. I looked for you but you weren’t here. Have fun?” Lily asked, leaning against the counter.
“Actually I did,” Emma said. “I went to a barbeque party in the Valley.”
“I’m all for people having fun,” Lily said mildly. “I want to hear all about it, but tomorrow. It’s late and I’m exhausted. I’ll take the guest room and we can change sheets in the morning.”
“Sounds good to me, I’m tired, too.”
Of all times for her sister to return. Couldn’t she have had at least one day to herself to sort through her emotions?
The sun was well up when Emma entered the kitchen the next morning.
The jeans and cotton shirt she wore were her own.
No more pretending to be her sister, no more wearing Lily’s clothes.
The faded blue denim molded her figure like an old skin.
The pink top was one of her favorites. She needed all the comfort she could get.
No matter how many ways she’d thought of to tell Logan, they all sounded inadequate.
She felt comfortable, but not a bit glamorous. So much for living life as Cinderella. Now the pumpkin had returned and the slipper was lost. And some time today she had to tell Logan Beckett who she really was.
“Thank goodness the coffee is already made,” she said as she headed for the counter to pour herself a cup.
Lily sat at the table, lounging in one of her vividly colored silk lounge suits—this one a hot teal, which glowed in the sun from the window.
“Help yourself. I had toast. If you want some you can help yourself to that, as well. Or we could go out for breakfast later. I like a big leisurely Sunday brunch. What do you think?”
“No, just coffee.”
The thought of food on an already churning stomach was more than she wanted to consider.
“So, want to talk about what all you did this week?” Lily asked when Emma sat opposite her.
“Not especially.”
She sipped the hot beverage. Her nerves jangled. She probably should have had decaf.
“Who took you to the party? Anyone I know?” Lily persisted, her eyes dancing in amusement.
The knock at the door caught Emma off guard. Stunned, she turned toward the door. She knew who was there. She wasn’t ready.
Lily unwound from the chair like a slinky cat. She crossed the kitchen floor as if she glided and threw open the door. If she was surprised to see Logan standing there almost breathing fire, she hid it well.
“Listen, lady, when you run—”
Logan caught sight of Emma and stopped dead. Narrowing his gaze, he looked at Lily, back at Emma.
“I knew there was something off.”
“Want to come in for coffee?” Lily asked.
He pushed past Lily and stormed across the kitchen, green fire blazing in his eyes.
“I want to talk to you,” he said.
“Logan,” Lily started.
“Not now.”
He waited until Emma stood before turning to head outside. Emma followed. Once at the top of the cliff, he turned to study her.
For a moment the only sound was the muffled crash of waves on the beach beyond the edge of the bluff.
“Want to tell me what’s going on? I suspected something was up, but I never knew you—Lily had a twin sister. What was your game? I don’t even know who you are.”
She cleared her throat and tried to push away the worry that filled her.
“I’m Emma Carter, Lily’s sister.”
“I can see you’re sisters, you’re twins .”
She nodded. “I’m sorry. Logan, listen to me.”
“And you should be sorry. I was falling for you.”
He spun around, taking several steps toward the edge of the cliff, his hands clinching into fists. “I should have known better. .”
He kicked a tuft of grass.
“I didn’t mean any harm,” Emma said, stepping closer. “Truly. If you would listen, I can explain.”
He looked over his shoulder. His eyes scanned her from head to toe. Shaking his head, he half turned.
“It’s my fault. I’ve known your sister for two years. The minute I saw the terry robe I should have known it wasn’t Lily. I didn’t know her well, but every indication pointed to her being like Crystal. Once she had fancy clothes, the mundane would never suit.”
“I can explain,” Emma repeated.
“Go for it.”
She took a deep breath.
“I didn’t start out pretending to be Lily.
I was surprised when you thought I was her.
I mean, I’m hardly the glamorous twin. I haven’t led an exciting life.
Living in a small town with my family, visiting California is probably the most exciting thing I’ll ever do.
But you thought I was Lily. And I’ve always thought she led such a charmed life.
I gave in to a silly impulse and didn’t correct you.
I mean, you can’t imagine the lift that gave me.
For once someone thought I was glamorous, exciting. ”
She trailed off as she realized his expression hadn’t softened.
He looked away, the muscles in his cheek jumping as he clenched his jaw.
She had to try.
“I was caught up in the fantasy. She left almost as soon as I arrived. Lily even suggested I try on her clothes, drive her car. It was fun, playing like these things were mine, like I fit into the California life-style. When I met you, I couldn’t believe you’d give me the time of day, much less spend so much time with me. ”
“My wife lied to me,” he said in a low, hard voice. “She cheated behind my back, and fed me a host of lies. I swore I’d never again be taken in by another woman.”
“I didn’t start out to fool you or anyone. You mistook me for Lily. And I thought it so fantastic, I just played along for a little while. Then time went on and still I pretended. When I realized that—”
Emma stopped. She dare not mention falling in love, he would scoff at her tender emotion.
“I tried to tell you last night in the car. Twice. But both times you said not to talk. I had no idea Lily would be home so soon. I was going to explain today.”
“You should have said something before things got out of hand. I’ve thought I was losing my mind. I don’t condone your sister’s lifestyle. She’s too much of a reminder of Crystal. But there was something different when I got back from Italy.”
He ran a hand through his hair.
Emma wanted to brush down his hair, push back the lock that fell over his forehead. Had she ruined everything by her masquerade?
“I’m sorry, Logan. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
His look caused her to step back. Blazing anger met her gaze.
“I’m not hurt , Emma Carter. Mad as heck that I fell for another woman’s lies, but not hurt . You have to care about somebody before they can hurt you.”
He strode away without another look. In seconds all she heard was the soft sound of the sea drifted up from the beach. Other than that, the day was silent
Emma was shocked at the turn of events. Words crowded her mind.
She had to explain. Slowly she followed.
When she reached the heavy wooden door of his Spanish-style house, she still hadn’t decided exactly what to say, but somehow she had to make him see she was not like Crystal, that she hadn’t meant to deliberately lie, only been caught up in the masquerade.
The fantasy. He dealt in fantasy. Surely he’d understand.
Yet she had, maybe not with any malicious intent, but she’d lied nonetheless. Pretense, while fantasy, was also a form of untruth.
She knocked.
Waited.
Nothing.
There was silence behind the door.
“Logan, please, give me a couple of minutes.”
She rapped again. Her knuckles hurt. She opened her hand and pounded her palm against the unforgiving door. Only silence met her efforts.
Slowly she turned and walked away. Tears threatened and she blinked rapidly. She couldn’t give way to tears. She had to think.
Would he ever listen to her, understand?
Or was this to be the end of what might have grown into a lifetime commitment?
Her heart ached and the guilt built until she thought she’d go crazy. It had started out as a harmless gesture. She had so much wanted to pretend she led a carefree, exciting life. The clothes had made the difference. Wearing her sister’s clothes made her feel free and interesting and gorgeous.
It was as if a spell had broken. Today the magic had ended. Logan wanted nothing to do with her.