Chapter Two
H oly smokes . Samantha Campbell fought the urge to let her gaze wander to Julian’s and failed. His eyes were already locked on her as they had been the last three times she’d tried not to look at him. Having an insanely beautiful stranger not only stand up for her but also make plans with her after she got off work never happened to her. Especially not on her birthday. She wasn’t lying about bad things happening on the day of her birth—in fact, she was probably downplaying the events.
The earliest birthday memory she could recall happened when she was around six. Right before her school friends came over for cake, her father announced he was enlisting. Her mom didn’t take this well and they had a knock-down, drag-out fight in the driveway. Instead of coming to the party, the first guest called the police. And the list went on from there. Broken bones, illness, bee stings and the like plagued her birthday memories. The worst, though, was her fifteenth. The night her father sealed his fate and ceased to be a free man. She strummed another chord on her guitar and shifted her thoughts. Maybe this would be the year that changed all that—the birthday curse that had followed her for as long as she could remember.
Even with butterflies batting around inside her stomach, she wasn’t going to hold her breath that Julian would still be there when she stopped singing for the night. With every minute that ticked past and he remained seated by the stage, the hope inside her amplified. It was as though she sang each song just for him. The rest of the bar’s patrons ceased to exist, and she went from avoiding Julian’s gaze to singing directly to him. The way he stepped in and handled that jerk at the bar made her feel safe. Made her feel like someone who meant something. Then in typical Sam fashion, she’d nearly fallen flat on her face—would’ve, if not for Julian’s quick hands. The feel of his strong arms braced around her had ignited a visceral reaction—one that left her flushed and her body tingling.
She’d guess he was law enforcement, but his hair was a touch too long, pieces of the burnished gold waves falling over his brows. His masculine features, the strong jaw, sharp cheeks, and straight nose balanced the beauty of his full lips and lushly lashed hazel eyes. Then there was his size. Shoulders broad enough to carry all of life’s burdens. He towered over her and she was in her highest heels.
When the last song ended, she thanked the audience and stepped off the stage. Julian was there waiting. Her heart started pounding at the look of awe on his face. Just for tonight, she was going to pretend to be someone deserving of a glance that gloriously intense. Forget who her father was and why he’d spend the rest of his days behind bars. Forget that her mother decided on her sixth birthday to bury her life’s disappointments in alcohol. Tonight was just for her, and she didn’t want to waste it. She was going to seize this unexpected moment of excitement, of happiness, and just enjoy the night. Wherever it led.
“Hey, Starburst. That was something else.” His deep, grumbly voice—combined with the nickname—kindled a spark of warmth low in her belly. “Need to grab anything from the back?”
“My purse and guitar case. I’ll be quick.” She turned on her heel, breath coming too fast, excitement and a whole lot of lust running rampant through her bloodstream.
“Careful, not quick. Those shoes, remember?”
“I wished for a bodyguard, not a babysitter.” She grinned and turned toward the back hallway to gather her things from the office. When she returned, Julian reached out and grabbed the guitar case with one hand and gripped hers with the other, guiding her through the bar. His hand radiated heat and was far bigger than her own. Maybe a smarter woman would fear going off with a man who could physically overpower her in a nanosecond, but all she felt near Julian was safe. “Want to put these in your car?”
“No. I walked.” She’d already witnessed his protective side, so his sideways glance didn’t surprise her.
He momentarily released her hand to pull open the bar’s front door. “Please tell me you live close.” His disgruntled mutter should’ve had a surge of annoyance coursing through her. She’d been independent for a long time. Like before she hit double digits. Maybe that’s why his words hit her heart, making her feel like she was wrapped in a heated blanket with hot cocoa and a good book.
“Close enough.” She shot him a reassuring grin, but his scowl deepened. A slight shiver raced along her skin that had nothing to do with her lack of a jacket. It was cool for late August, but it was still Virginia, and fifty degrees wasn’t exactly bone-chilling. Every time Julian’s hazel eyes grazed over her, goose bumps broke over her arms.
“Not safe to walk alone at night. Those heels and this big-ass guitar case make it even less so.” His brows were drawn together, forehead slightly creased. “We’ll put it in my truck, and I’ll drive you home.”
“You don’t have to—”
“Birthday bodyguard. Remember?” he said, pausing at a black Ford. “I have final say on all things safety on August twenty-first.” He placed down the guitar case instead of releasing her hand, and fished the keys out of his pocket.
“You’re right. I don’t know what I was thinking.” She had to school her features at his pointed gaze.
“Why do I get the feeling you’re laughing at me?” A smile ghosted his lips as he put the guitar in the truck and grabbed something from the center console. She had a feeling he didn’t smile often, and the slight twitch of his mouth felt like a monumental feat. “Know the diner I’m thinking of?”
“Yeah, it’s just down the block. Best pie ever.”
Another little grin quirked his lips. “Want to save your feet and drive?”
“No,” she said, touched that he’d think of her feet. He wasn’t what she was accustomed to, but she found his concern refreshing. “It’s not far. Besides, these are my most comfortable shoes.”
“Those, Starburst, were not made for comfort.” He shut the truck door and locked the vehicle with the key fob. “I’d hate to see what your other shoes look like.” Streetlights illuminated planters still overflowing with periwinkle asters and goldenrod. Rounded hedges lined the sidewalks beneath shady oaks, their leaves rustling in the soft breeze rolling off the nearby ocean.
“I have a feeling my shoe collection would give you instant anxiety.”
“I’m sure it would.” He squeezed her hand and warmth spread through her. She’d never had a one-night stand, but with her hand tucked into his and those gorgeous hazel eyes pinned on her like she was some sort of otherworldly goddess, she suddenly craved one.
A fluorescent pink sign hung above the diner’s doorframe. “In you go,” Julian said as he opened the door for her. The moment she placed one foot over the threshold the scent of burgers grilling and tart pie fillings assailed her. Her eyes zeroed in on the source. Pies and cakes crowded the display case, and a wall-mounted chalkboard with daily specials hung behind the desserts. A waitress walked by with a tray stacked high. There were a few tables filled, but not many. She’d bet they got their rush around the time that the bars closed.
“You can go ahead and sit wherever you’d like—I’ll be right with you.” They crossed teal-and-white-checkered floor to a corner booth at the back of the restaurant. Julian sat with his back to the wall, and she slid across the vinyl-covered cushion opposite him. She studied him as he scanned the diner. He seemed to be hyperalert, supporting her idea that he might be law enforcement. The exact reason she wasn’t going to ask for his number or try to contact him after tonight, but she couldn’t deny the instant spark of something profound from the moment their eyes first met. He was beautiful and that beauty went beyond what was visible on the surface. He was a natural protector, and she could sense a goodness from him despite the air of danger surrounding him. No, she wouldn’t drag him into her murky world. This was one night. One perfect night spending time—maybe more—with the most ruggedly handsome man she’d ever laid eyes on. One who would have a stranger’s back in a bar. One who would wait through her shift. It might not seem like much to some, but to her, it was everything.
“Dinner, dessert, or both?”
“Dessert, but don’t let me stop you if you’re hungry for something else.”
His gaze dropped to her lips, and when his eyes locked back on her something had changed in his expression. Julian’s eyes had darkened, pupils blown out. An explosive charge sparked in the air, and her belly tightened as she realized how her words sounded. She wasn’t one to overtly flirt.
“I didn’t mean sex, although I certainly wouldn’t be disappointed if that’s where this night was headed. You stood up for me. You waited. That means a lot. I really did mean food-food, though—”
“Sam.” Her name was sharp on his tongue. More of a command. Why that built an ache at the apex of her thighs she had no idea. His voice had changed, and his face darkened in a very different way. A way that said her words had struck a nerve. “You’re a beautiful woman. Since the second I laid eyes on you, I haven’t been able to look away. You’re all sass and confidence on stage, but when you step off, something shifts. I’m drawn to both sides, but the side of you that punches me in the gut and steals my breath is sweet, quirky, and unsure. I can’t resist the lure of sweet Sam. That being said, me standing up for you at the bar, me waiting for you to be done your gig, does not mean you owe me a damn thing. Nothing, Starburst. Do you understand? We will not do anything you’re uncomfortable with. We can stuff ourselves with sweets and I can drive you home, and I’ll be happy I got to meet you. You want to come up to my apartment so I can show you how amazing your birthday can be, where I taste and kiss every inch of you into multiple orgasms, we can do that, too.”
The breath caught in her throat, and the tiny hairs on the back of her neck rose. “You’re a bit cocky.” His words had seared through her. She was thankful for the lacy ruffles of her shirt, because her nipples were straining against the sheer fabric of her bra.
“No, Sam. Confident in my ability to give you that. But you need to know, that’s all I’m able to give.”
Her cheeks heated as a blush worked its way up her face. “You, ah…might have your work cut out for you with the first. And as for the second, I’m not looking for a relationship.”
He leaned in closer and brushed his thumb over her hand. She opened her mouth to blurt out that she wasn’t very experienced, but closed it when the waitress rushed over.
“I’m so sorry about the wait,” the woman wheezed. She’d clearly been running around delivering food and busing tables on her own.
“Juggling all that’s an artform. Don’t worry about us.” She gave the waitress a reassuring smile.
“Thanks. That’s usually not the reaction customers have.” The waitress blew out a quick breath. “What can I get for you?”
She ordered lemon meringue pie and a soda while he got a slice of cake, apple pie, and coffee.
“So, back to that comment. If you’re implying you’re hard to satisfy in the bedroom, I don’t shy away from a challenge, but what makes you think I’ll have any trouble giving you pleasure?”
She wasn’t going to go into the mortification of the one and only time she’d been with someone. Relationship avoidance was an area in which she excelled. Getting comfortable enough to start a physical relationship with someone was too complicated and involved too many questions. She shrugged as the heat on her cheeks crept up to her ears. “My first time was nothing to write home about.” By nothing to write home about she meant the whole relationship had been a lie. A joke at her expense. She doubted she’d ever fully get past the emotional pain. It was one of those defining moments that marked you. That your mind could take you back to out of nowhere, making your cheeks and eyes burn while picking out apples at the grocery store or waiting for a red light to turn green.
“And after that?”
“That’s it.” Her scalp tingled as she shook away the memory. The Monday after high school’s senior prom had been one of the most humiliating of her life, and growing up in a tiny town where your father is infamous for his crimes made her no stranger to that emotion. A weight sunk to the bottom of her stomach. Her past was the reason she didn’t date. She didn’t like to open up, but with Julian sitting across from her patiently, she wanted to confide in him, and that was dangerous. That would lead to heartbreak. Still, she couldn’t seem to stop her lips from moving. “I joke about my birthday, because if I don’t laugh, it’s too easy to cry.” His gaze softened and he reached across the table, taking her hand. The contact of his rough skin against hers was a shot of strength that fortified her to continue. “Every year I’d wish for things to get better, and then something would promptly remind me that nothing was going to be different. It took me far too long to realize that no one in my life was going to change, so if I wanted to do better, be better, I had to do it alone.”
“And where do you come from?”
“A place where my mother sees me as a burden. As a child who ruined her marriage. And a father who used his family as an excuse to do unforgivable things in the name of earning more money to support us. I was the reason. The reason for every misstep or family misfortune, and she’s never let me forget it.”
His eyes sharpened, and the connection she already felt somehow deepened. “The reason,” he murmured and shook his head slowly. “That’s something we have in common.”
Of all the things Julian could’ve said, that surprised her the most. How much she’d shared struck her. No, she hadn’t given Julian many details, but she’d laid out who she was at the core. Someone who had been let down over and over. Someone who was ashamed of her past. Maybe she’d opened up because after tonight, she’d probably never see him again. He not only made her feel safe—he was also safe because he’d already laid out that there could be nothing more between them.
“I was the reason, too. The reason my mother made the decision to leave her family. The reason my sister and I were left to fend for ourselves. So yeah, I’m familiar with being the reason, too. It’s a bad thing to be. To feel. But you know what, Sam? You’re my reason for smiling tonight, and that’s not something that happens often.”
She swallowed hard. Julian had given her the kindest words anyone had ever spoken to her.
The waitress was coming back with their drinks and desserts. She tried to ignore the way Julian was looking at her as their plates were set down, like he saw way too much.
When the waitress walked away, Julian pulled something from his pocket. Her heart thudded in her chest when he plucked a pink-striped candle from the box and sunk it into the slice of cake. Part of her recognized that her mouth was agape. Where on Earth had he found a candle? The other part was so entrenched in the sweet gesture she couldn’t make her jaw shut. When Julian flicked a lighter and the wick glowed to life, her eyes stung. She took one breath, then two, trying to maintain her dignity and not let tears spill over her cheeks. After what she’d divulged, he was still sitting here at the end of the night, sinking a candle into a piece of cake for her.
“Happy birthday, Starburst. Make a wish.”
“It doesn’t seem fair that I get two wishes.” Her voice was barely audible over the fifties music pumping from the speakers, the scuff of feet, and the slap of the kitchen door as the waitress ran orders.
“Heard the universe owes you a few.” He slid the plate to her.
She closed her eyes. This night had been beyond anything she could’ve imagined when she stepped out of her house. Whether Julian knew it or not, he’d given her something special. Distracted her from a myriad of heartbreaking memories. I wish…for this man to have more reasons to smile. She puffed her cheeks and blew out the candle. When she opened her eyes, the hunger embedded in his made her squirm against the seat. She wasn’t hungry anymore—not for the dessert at least. They both scarfed down their pie, took a few bites of the cake, and Julian left two twenty-dollar bills on the table. She’d lived her whole life playing it safe, working hard, trying to be a better person than the ones who’d brought her into this world. Tonight she was taking what she wanted: Julian.
*
They’d held hands on the way to the truck and through the short drive to Julian’s apartment complex, but once the elevator doors closed, hers fell to his chest. He set down her guitar, which he’d insisted on carrying inside. Her heart beat faster when his hands framed her face. She’d been expecting him to devour her because of the hunger in his eyes, but he was staring at her like he was soaking in the moment, gently smoothing his thumbs along her cheekbones.
“You glow, Sam. That was the first thing that struck me in the bar. You have this inner light…” He trailed off, lowering his head, brushing his lips against hers. He was so gentle, and yet the power of his kiss slammed into her with such force, the ground jolted, and not because of the movement of the elevator. He licked her bottom lip, drawing it between his own. Tingles shot through her. His straight-from-the-shower scent surrounded her as did the waves of heat pulsing off his towering frame.
She’d never felt so connected to another person, which was startling because they’d just met, but when his tongue slipped against hers, she melted into him. All they were doing was kissing, and it was the most intimate experience of her life. Maybe this was only one night, but he was giving her everything. Acceptance, care, a place to belong, no matter how brief. By the way he broke the kiss every so often, gazed at her with reverence before pulling her back against him, she thought he might be experiencing the same sense of synergy. The elevator pinged, startling them both. He dropped his forehead to hers. “Sam.” No one had ever spoken her name like that. With importance. Lust. Wonder. Goose bumps broke out over her arms, and Julian’s hand shot out to grab the elevator doors as they began to close.
“You first. I’ve got the doors.” His voice rumbled over her, sparking awareness in places she rarely gave much thought to.
When she stepped out, he was right behind her, one hand on the small of her back, and guitar in the other. They stopped halfway down the hall and he fished his key out of his pocket. His hand trembled when he slid it into the lock and turned the handle. She didn’t think it was the kind of shaking caused by fear or nerves, but holding in some insurmountable power that wanted to break loose. Once they were inside, he carefully set her guitar case down, then stood apart from her, giving her space.
“Are you okay?” She took one step, then another until she was close enough to touch him.
“I don’t want to come on too strong. I take my role of birthday bodyguard seriously, even if it means protecting you from myself.” His brow furrowed, like it was taking his total concentration not to drag her against him.
She shook her head and smiled. “The last thing I feel when I’m with you is scared. You’re the reason I was safe from that creep at the bar. The reason my worst day of the year, something I was dreading, has been so amazing.” Her words struck a chord with him, and she watched in wonder as the impact of them stole over his features.
It took him a moment to speak, but he cleared his throat. “Thank you. It feels nice to be the reason for something good. You’re safe with me. I just need you to understand that whatever we do, it can stop at any point. If you’re uncomfortable, if you decide this isn’t what you want, all you have to do is tell me.” His voice was hoarsening with each breath, but she didn’t doubt he meant every word. This man was a protector. Something she’d severely lacked in her young life. Maybe that’s why these emotions, this urge to never let him go, were battering her from all angles.
“Okay, Julian.” There was no way she’d change her mind, but his words touched her. Confusion set in when he knelt, then morphed into something else entirely when he started to unzip one of her boots and slide it off. He did the same with the other while her heart expanded at the care he was taking with her. When he stood and straightened, their difference in height was more apparent without her heeled boots. Comical even.
“Missed out in the height department.” She gave him a small smile, trying to mask her insecurities. Julian just shook his head and swept her up in his arms.
“You’re not missing a damn thing. Come on, birthday girl.” He kissed her as he carried her straight through the house to the bedroom. His shoulders and chest were like stone beneath her hands. Massive. Bold. Carrying a strength the average human didn’t possess. She was vaguely aware of him lowering her to the floor and stirring up her desire with another kiss that started at her lips and trailed down her neck. His hands were at the hem of her shirt, and she lifted her arms so he could ease it over her head.
She shimmied out of her jeans and unclasped her bra so she was standing naked in front of him. Heat flashed in his eyes, darkening them, as he swept his gaze over her. “So beautiful, Starburst. Just you and these earrings, and nothing else,” he said, brushing his fingers over the dangling stars, “is going to fuel my fantasies for a long fucking time.” He dragged her against him and lowered his lips to hers. Her breasts had grown heavy, nipples straining against the cotton fabric of his shirt. The material of his jeans rubbed against her inner thigh as heat spread from her core to the junction of her hips. The sensation of his clothing against her bare skin had wetness building at her center. A hollow ache taking hold.
He dragged his own shirt over his head and shucked off his jeans. Holy smokes. From head to feet he was pure perfection, and the erection he was sporting was no different. Every inch of him was solid and defined. She bit the inside of her cheek and looked away, suddenly self-conscious. Her mother’s taunts that she was nothing special echoed in her head. Part of her knew not to judge her worth by those toxic opinions while the other wanted to grab the nearest piece of fabric and cover up.
“What thought did you just have?”
A lie was on the tip of her tongue. She could brush him off, tell him all she was thinking about was getting him into bed or tell a half-truth and say she was struck by his beauty. So far, though, she’d been more honest with Julian than some of her closest coworkers. Even her best friend. “I’m nothing special and you…God, you look like you were carved out of marble.”
His gorgeous hazel eyes narrowed. “Whoever told you that bullshit, it’s not welcome here, Sam. Wipe that thought out of your mind, that person out of your life.” He closed the gap between them. The weight of his warm hands landed on her shoulders, but instead of pulling her to the bed, he walked them backward a few steps, then turned her toward a mirror hanging over his bureau.
He stood behind her, caressing her shoulders, molding his hands down her sides and hips. Watching him touch her body had her breath quickening, the ache inside her intensifying. The way his chest was rising and falling, his heart hammering against her back, the image was appealing to him, too. “There’s not one inch of you I’m not drawn to.” He lowered his lips to the sensitive curve of her neck, eyes locked on hers in the reflection of the mirror. “I want those legs, perfect legs, strong from walking home in heels with your guitar, wrapped around my waist. Want to feel every inch of your smooth skin. Everything I’ve seen, everything I’ve done has been hard, but you’re so soft. By soft I don’t mean weak. Feminine. Powerful. Alluring. Like an hourglass. No hard lines or sharp edges. Fuck. You have no idea how desirable you are. How beautiful.” He cupped her breasts, plucked at the tight tips, until she was clenching her thighs together. “If you ever doubt again, I hope you think of this. Think of how you’re the reason my control is all but shattered. Something I’ve worked my entire life to hone.”
You’re the reason.
Those words again. Words that meant something to them both. Bonded them through shared pain. How she loved that they were taking that cruel and spiteful phrase and giving it new meaning. She turned then, skimmed her palms over his chest, and curled her fingers into the rich citrine waves of his hair. Julian lifted her, and she wound her legs around him, just as he’d described. He walked them to the bed and set her down on the edge. Instead of climbing in next to her, he dropped to his knees between her legs. He said she shattered his control, but he was doing so much more. He was breaking apart all the lies she told herself to protect her heart. That she didn’t want someone special in her life. That if it was too good to be true it probably was. That she was better off, happier even, alone.
With each reverent stroke of his tongue and nip of his teeth, he was crushing her desire to continue walking through life alone, replacing it with pleasure as deep and profound as the connection that had formed seamlessly between them. For the first time in a long time, she was daring to dream. Julian was the reason.
Maybe this one night wouldn’t be over in the morning. Maybe it was just the beginning.