Chapter 16
D espite us making our relationship official that night, we didn’t sleep together, in the guest room or his.
We want to get to know each other, going on actual dates, and learning to trust each other on a different level before we get physical.
Adding to that, I’m still a virgin. Sex is not something I want to jump into right away.
Besides, who knows if his parents will walk in? Even though they know we’re dating—even if they still think it’s not real—I don’t want them to think less of me. We’re both eighteen, but it’s still their house. I don’t want to be disrespectful.
The next morning at school is completely different than other days.
It’s like a dam burst open the night before, and I can’t seem to keep my hands off Ethan.
On the drive to school, I hold his hand the whole ride.
When we’re walking inside, while his arm is slung around my shoulders, I hold his hand and have the other thrown securely around his waist. I would have attached myself to his hip if that was possible.
When he walks me to my homeroom, he kisses me on the lips. It’s a light brush of his lips, but it’s like time stopped. And not just for the two of us. Everyone nearby looks on—some with open mouths—like they don’t know we’re dating.
I try to duck my head to avoid the stares, but Ethan tips my chin up. “They’re not important,” he whispers gently, rubbing a thumb over my cheek. “It’s just you and me, creep.” I nod warily, and he brings me in for a hug, kissing my forehead before he jogs off just as the bell rings.
Walking into homeroom today is sort of how it felt walking into homeroom the day after Ethan gave me his jersey to wear. Everyone is staring and a few people whisper. I make my way to my desk and try to make myself invisible for the next twenty minutes.
After what seems like forever, the bell dismisses us and I gratefully hustle out of the classroom.
Just as I’m stepping into the hallway, I almost walk right into Dawn. In the back of my mind, I think it’s weird that she’s here when I’ve never seen her outside of my classroom before.
Sneering at me, she puts her hands up like I just assaulted her instead of accidentally bumping into her. “Ugh. Don’t touch me, queer,” she shouts, making everyone stop and look in our direction.
It takes everything in me not to roll my eyes.
Before I can say anything, I hear, “Back the fuck off, Dawn,” from behind me in a familiar voice. I turn to see Elle, her fiery eyes trained on Dawn. “It was an accident. Stop being a bitch.”
Dawn looks taken aback, like she didn’t expect anyone to check her shitty behavior. But Elle isn’t backing down. Her expression is hard as she stares Dawn down.
Scoffing, Dawn says in a haughty voice, “Looks like somebody doesn’t want to make the squad this basketball season.” She tosses her hair over her shoulder and sneers at Elle.
Elle, one of the nicest people I know and who I love immensely at this moment, hooks her arm through mine and pulls me away. “Oh, please. I didn’t plan to try out this season, you fucking bitch. Not with you as captain.”
Dawn’s face turns red and she opens her mouth, but Ethan walks up and she snaps her mouth shut. She smiles and tries to sidle up to him, making to hook her arm through his as Elle did with me.
He effortlessly shakes her off, then takes my hand. Elle lets me go and waves, before she breezes down the hallway.
Dawn pouts and stands with her hands on her hips. “What is this, Ethan? Are we really done?”
His incredulous look is almost comical. “Dawn, we haven’t been a thing for months. Jakoby and I are dating. I’ve been done with you. Which part don't you understand?”
“You can’t want him. I mean, look at him. He’s a…. a he,” she finishes with a huff.
“I’m aware,” Ethan says. “Leave me and my boyfriend the fuck alone.” The bell rings, and Ethan turns me around and we walk into our English class.
When we get to our table, I lean over to whisper, “What is her problem? Why is she still bothering us?”
“Jealousy,” he answers simply. “She likes the idea of me and her together because we’re ‘supposed’ to be together,” he air quotes.
As a cheerleader and a football player, it’s expected for them to date and get married and end up with two point five kids, a white picket fence, and the toy dog. I’m sure she didn’t expect for Ethan to even be interested in the queer kid in school, much less date him.
Turning to face him, I open my mouth to speak, to tell him that we can just tell people we broke up so the rest of his school year is easy, but Ryder hops on the table before I can say anything. “Hey. Party at my house this weekend. Parents are out of town. You two comin’?”
Ethan looks at me, allowing me to answer.
I turn to Ryder and tell him we’ll be there. His smile is genuine and he pats my back. “Great! It’s going to be fun!” I can think of a lot of things it will be, and fun isn’t one of them.
I give Ethan a deadpan look, and he laughs and kisses me on the cheek.
Since we don’t have the play to keep us busy anymore, we have a pop quiz as soon as the bell rings. It’s on the Shakespearean era and what we think led to the success of his plays. It’s in essay form, so I’m sure everyone will pass, as long as they actually do it.
While we’re walking to my next class, Ethan asks, “What are you doing for Thanksgiving?”
Thanksgiving is about two weeks away. We’ll be on break, which sucks because I won’t see Ethan every day unless I stay over at his place. So some days, it’ll just be me in my horrible house without one of my best friends.
I shrug. I usually go to Crystal’s house since my mom is rarely sober enough to cook even the most basic meal. “Nothing, probably.”
“Good. My parents asked if you wanted to join us. I asked Mitch and Elle too. They’ll be coming over after dinner with their families. Ryder’s coming too. Invite Crystal and we can hang out in the theater room.”
I scrunch up my face. “The theater room?” I’ve been to Ethan’s plenty of times and I’ve never seen a theater room.
“The living room is the theater room, creep. I was fucking with you.” I once told him that his TV looks like a movie screen, now he’s teasing me about it. If he wasn’t so fucking cute, I’d be pissed.
“I hate you,” I mumble without heat. He laughs and kisses my forehead like he always does.
Stopping outside my class, he leans against the wall and I stand beside him. “Our first track meet is on Friday. We leave school early since it’s an invitational.”
The track season started a few weeks ago.
I wanted to go to the first meet, but it’s in the next state over and they have a two-hour bus ride to get there.
I’ll have to wait until the first home meet, which is after the New Year.
It’s at the local college that has an indoor track and it's always packed.
This year, Ethan hopes to beat the fifty-five meter and two hundred meter dash records.
While he runs a good fifty-five, he says it takes him longer to get his speed up, which is why he’s better at the two hundred meter dash.
He could break the three hundred meter dash record too, but I think he likes the ease of the two hundred.
I might not know football, but I know track, and Ethan is fast. His stride is good, he has great turnover, and he’s a rocket out of the blocks.
I sigh and lean into him. “I know. It’ll be fine. You’ll be back in time for the party?”
I don’t mind going with Crystal, since she’s who usually takes me to parties anyway. I just like being around him.
“I will, but I might be late. The invitationals always run a bit long.” He must see the sad look on my face because he follows up with, “Don’t worry. I’ll tell Ryder to watch out for you. He likes you.”
That’s something I gathered when he asked if Ethan and I were actually together. Ryder was never mean or said anything rude to me. He was more like Ethan, they just didn’t really notice me. It sounds bad, but I’ve always been invisible, but that’s okay because I don’t really like people.
“Poor substitute, but I’ll take it,” I try to joke.
He chuckles, then gives me a lingering kiss that I feel down to my toes.
When he pulls away, he thumbs my bottom lip, making me inhale a shuddery breath and says, “I’ll be sure to tell him you said that.”
I gasp. “You wouldn’t.”
Ethan doesn’t answer. He just laughs and jogs down the hall. I turn to walk into my class.
He wouldn’t, right?
Of course he did.
I’m walking into the cafeteria with Crystal when I’m ambushed by Ryder. “Poor substitute? For Ethan? I’ll have you know, I’m amaaaazzziiinnnng company,” he says, drawing the word out. “Watch. On Friday, you’re going to have so much fun, you’ll want to hang out with me all the time.”
I look at him, mouth open, and Crystal laughs. She puts her hand on her hip. “Hello to you too, Ryder. I’m doing fine, how are you? Good? That’s great.”
He turns his attention to her and smiles lazily. “I’m really good, now that you’ve deemed me worthy to talk to.”
Crystal rolls her eyes and brushes past him. “Oh, please. I’ve been speaking to you for years. You just play too much for me to take you seriously.”
That seems to bring him up short. He looks shocked. “You think so? I mean, I can, you know…not play so much?”
He looks at me like I can help him. He’s on his own there. I had no idea Ryder wanted to talk to Crystal in any kind of way. I’ve basically been living under a rock as far as other people are concerned, but I’m sure if it was worth mentioning, Crystal would have told me.
She smiles sweetly at him, but I know what that means. She’s going to let him down, but gently. “I doubt it, but that’s not a bad thing, Ryder. Just not for me, you know?” She really is nice about it. I think Ryder understands, but it still doesn’t stop the hurt that slides across his face.