Chapter Fifteen #2
Jane didn’t say anything in response, and for a full minute, Samuel basked in the feel of her fingers in his hand.
This was likely the most he would touch her for the rest of his life, and while every instinct was urging him to wrap his arms around her and never let go, he held firmly to his principles.
He would not be able to live with himself if he reneged on his values.
And it was that sense of honor that Jane apparently couldn’t live without. Rotating her wrist so she could grab his hand, Jane pulled him toward her as she kissed him.
As a fairly prominent millionaire, Samuel had traveled extensively and had been invited to some of the most exclusive balls and soirees held in Europe for politicians, dignitaries, and royalty, where he had witnessed his fair share of firework displays.
They had all been brilliant and yet, they all paled in comparison to kissing Jane.
Every fiber in his body was zinging and exploding. It felt like his skin was on fire, like his heart was going to burst, like he was starving and satisfied at once.
His mind raced as he tasted the sweet remnants of wine punch on her lips, the scent of her hair, the silkiness of her skin. His tongue searched her mouth, desperate and hungry, while a small voice sounded from the corner of his mind, warning him to stop.
He wanted to ignore it, to throw out every principle, every damned moral he had, but he couldn’t. Dragging his mouth away, he tried to tell her as much.
“Jane, I can’t—”
“Why should you be so moral and good?” she asked, her tone surprisingly shaky. He focused solely on her as she continued. “No one is. No one cares so much about doing charitable deeds or being a good person, like you do. Why?” She even shoved him slightly as her eyes became misty. “Why?”
“I don’t know,” he said honestly.
“Are you trying to trick me? Because you needn’t. I already…” She shook her head, unable to finish. He waited as she inhaled and began again. “I would do anything you asked me to do with Mr. Liddell if you thought it might help—”
Samuel’s hands gripped her arms.
“Stop saying things like that, Jane. I can’t tell you what it feels like to hear you say that. It eats at me.”
“But I would. I’d do anything for you.”
And that was it. All his willpower, his morals, all smashed to bits by five little words. He swooped her into his arms.
The dam had finally broken, and Samuel was untethered.
He could barely stop himself as he picked her up and sat her on top of the desk.
Her hands were holding his face as she kissed him, while his hands gathered the hem of her skirts, pulling them up over her knees.
Jane pushed at his lapels, trying to undress him from her seated position.
Samuel leaned his forehead against hers as he yanked off his dinner jacket, ever aware of Jane’s ragged breathing.
“Jane, I—”
“If you say anything that might stop this, Samuel, please,” she said, closing her eyes as she placed a kiss at the corner of his mouth. “Don’t.”
“But—”
Jane’s hand snaked around the back of his head and pulled him deep into a kiss.
It seemed he wasn’t the only one in desperate need.
Pulling back slightly to break their kiss, Jane’s eyes fluttered open as his hand caressed her cheek, his thumb catching the bottom of her lip.
Jane’s mouth enveloped his thumb, biting gently at his knuckle as her velvety tongue licked the tip of his finger.
He cursed before kissing her hard. Samuel’s hands couldn’t get enough of her. He reached beneath her skirts once more and felt the stockings of her upper outer thighs. God, he wanted to be inside her.
“Jane,” he rasped between kisses. “I can’t… I can’t keep going…”
“Please, don’t stop.”
“God, Jane, what you do to me,” he murmured more to himself than to her as her hands moved down his stomach. He instantly grabbed both of her wrists with his hands, stopping her. Her gray eyes locked onto his. “This is madness. We have a houseful of guests. And you, you…”
“What? What about me?”
He shook his head.
“You’re a lady, Jane. Innocent or not, I don’t know or care, but you are a lady, and you are in my employ…”
Her cool hand came up to hold his chin straight as she looked into his eyes.
“Outside of this room, yes. Out there, I am a lady and I am your employee and my livelihood is tied to your ultimate decision.” He tried to pull away, but she stopped him.
“But here? Right here, with you, I am only a woman who’s only ever been sure of my own loneliness.
” She swallowed as he inhaled. “Please, Samuel. Do not deny me this moment. I fear it might be the only honest one I’ll ever have. ”
Why did she say such devastating things? he wondered as he kissed her hard. Why was she so sure that she would lead a lonesome life? Is that where the sadness in her eyes came from?
He dropped to his knees, as Jane’s hands gripped the edge of the desk and she hesitantly spread her legs. Reaching beneath her knees, Samuel pulled her roughly to the edge of the desk, causing her to inhale sharply, before he tore apart her fragile undergarments and tasted her.
Jane’s right leg lifted and wrapped around the back of his neck, trapping Samuel in a place he would gladly spend the rest of his days.
Her demand and his hunger fed on each other.
He licked and arched, she moaned and he answered, pumping his middle finger in and out as he felt her begin to shake with ecstasy.
Jane’s hands grabbed his hair, pulling and twisting at it as her orgasm broke over her, and Samuel was in his own ecstasy. If she asked him to, he would spend the rest of his life as the curator of her pleasure.
“Sam-Samuel.” Her breathy voice wrapped around his name and he nearly came himself.
Her legs went slack as he licked her one more time, before leaning back. The hem of her dress slipped down her thighs, but Samuel’s eyes were on Jane’s face as he wiped his mouth and mustache dry.
Her mouth hung open, her pale cheeks flushed with pink and her eyes sated. This was his favorite version of her, and he watched for too long, trying to commit her image in this exact moment in time to his memory.
But they were not finished.
“Retire, now,” he started as he rose, touching her cheek with his hand. “Make some excuse and leave the ball.”
“Everyone will know.”
“I don’t care.”
The color on her cheeks deepened.
“You should have more care for your reputation,” she said as she stood. She leaned into him, inhaling deeply against his chest. For some reason, it made him feel cherished. “Tonight. Will you come to my room?”
“I shouldn’t, but I doubt I’ll be able to help it. Yes, Jane. I’ll come to your room.”
She bit her lip.
“I hope you do,” she said softly, glancing down.
But Samuel wouldn’t let her look away from him when she said things like that. Instead, he tipped her chin with his finger, tilted her head back.
“Why should I find you now, here, like this?” he asked, more to the universe than to Jane herself.
“I don’t know, but I’m glad you have,” she said as she kissed him.
It was a gentler, softer kiss than before. One full of promises and hope. He wanted those kisses just as much as he wanted the wildly passionate ones, if not more so. They held a hope for a future that Samuel had rarely, if ever, dared to dream.
Since his youth, Samuel had always wanted that which had escaped him in his childhood.
A large family. He wanted a dozen children in a house that was always full of laughter and cheer.
A place where death and sickness never came and where he was in the constant company of a partner who understood and supported his purpose.
But he had always considered this dream of his too selfish to even consider. He had so much already; who was he to ask for more?
Jane took his one hand and lifted it to her mouth. She kissed the back of his hand and smiled at him.
“We should return.”
“Hm.”
She stood and tried to fix herself but couldn’t straighten her skirt. Samuel helped her before turning her around.
“We’ve already been gone too long,” he said. “You go first.”
“How do I look?”
“Stunning.”
She blushed.
“Samuel, I’m serious.”
“So am I,” he said as he leaned forward and kissed her quickly. “Now go.”
Jane nodded and hurried toward the door. She opened it and turned back.
“Tonight?”
“Yes, tonight,” he said as she smirked and disappeared, closing the door behind her.
Samuel’s smile faded as he considered what sort of steps he would now have to take to secure his latest goal. To keep Jane at Milton House forever.