KIERAN #2
This was a really weird conversation to be having with his former stepdad, but the caring tone in Derek’s voice made him feel funny. It wasn’t something he experienced from the guys he was usually with. The only other man who cared about him like that was Hassan.
“Is he responsible for the bruises Grant mentioned?” asked Derek, his voice softer.
It reminded Kieran of when he was younger and upset about something.
Derek would talk to him in that soft voice.
It always calmed him down. Christ, that was a mindfuck if ever there was one.
All Kieran could do was nod. He was worried what his voice would sound like if he spoke now. He was feeling too many emotions.
“Did you use your safe word?”
Kieran shook his head.
“Did you want to?”
He nodded.
“What’s his name, Kieran?”
He shook his head.
“I won’t do anything without your consent, but it’s important that guys like that are dealt with.”
He shook his head again.
“You don’t know his name, do you?”
Another shake of the head. He could feel tears stinging his eyes, but he couldn’t look away from Derek.
“His profile name?”
“Domtop69,” he said, finding his voice.
Kieran felt his face heat. The look in Derek’s eyes intensified.
Could the interest be reciprocated? No chance.
Kieran was a hot mess, not someone a guy like Derek would go for, and why was he even thinking like that?
How long had Derek been a dom? Had his mum been his sub?
Okay . . . and his cock immediately softened at those thoughts.
“Thank you, Kieran. I’ll get the room ready for you.”
Kieran noticed Derek’s voice crack, but he could have imagined it. Once he’d left the room, Kieran felt like he could breathe again. Should he just leave? He didn’t like how Derek made him feel. Not in a bad way, quite the opposite, and that was the problem.
“Where have you been?” asked Hassan when Kieran walked into the flat on Sunday morning. “It’s not like you to stay over.”
“You’re funny. I’m going to bed.”
“Get the fuck back here.”
Kieran sighed. “Where’s Sarah?”
“Asleep. What’s going on with you?”
“Can we talk later? It’s been a very messed-up night, and I got little sleep – and not for the reasons you’re thinking. I just need to get my head around it, and we can talk before you go back to work.”
Hassan looked at him with concern. Some would call it his doctor's face, but Kieran knew that even though they were the same age, he’d always acted like a big brother.
They’d bonded over the fact that their respective families didn’t want to know them, though their upbringings couldn’t have been more different.
Kieran was raised by a middle-class mother, who was on her third husband by the time he left home, and his dad wasn’t one of them.
He didn’t know who his father was. Hassan had been raised by a traditional Arab family in Yorkshire.
When he’d been caught getting a blow job off one of the local white boys, his parents hadn’t been sure which was worse.
The difference was that they’d allowed him to stay at home until he went to university and then asked him not to come back unless he changed his lifestyle.
Hassan had a brother, but he hadn’t spoken to him since he left home either.
“Is this something to do with Derek?” asked Hassan.
“Kind of, but not what you’re thinking.”
“Okay, so you didn’t fuck him?”
Kieran took such a sharp intake of breath, it triggered a coughing fit.
Hassan knew he’d had a crush on Derek when he was younger, but last night had cranked it up a gazillion.
He would have done anything that man had asked him, which was all kinds of fucked up.
Thankfully, all he’d actually done last night was sleep in the spare bedroom, although he’d slept very little.
His mind had been spinning with everything Derek had said.
The conversation about his mum felt secondary to their following conversation.
He believed Derek’s side of things, but he wasn’t ready to forgive a decade of hurt after one conversation.
It would take time, and he had more questions.
Was it even possible to have Derek back in his life and be able to tamp down his highly inappropriate thoughts?
“Why would you say that?” asked Kieran, not wanting to admit anything to his bestie.
“Over the years you’ve fucked a lot of men.”
“Er . . . thank you!”
Hassan snorted. “They have been varied, but there’s a certain type that gets you going, and after doing some research on Derek . . . well, I’m a clever guy.” He smiled.
“Of course you’ve researched him,” said Kieran, shaking his head with a smile. “It’s nothing like that. He explained his side of what happened, and I need to think things through. I slept in his spare room as he didn’t want me to be here on my own.”
“Why? Did something happen?”
“Some guy got handsy in the club. Derek dealt with it and had his security throw him out. It was no big deal, but he was being all stepdad and made me stay at his place.”
“Made you?” asked Hassan, raising an eyebrow.
“Not like that. We needed to talk, and at least it’s done now. I need to get some sleep for a couple of hours. I don’t want to fuck myself up for tonight, but I’ll just be a zombie all day if I stay awake.”
“We’ll go out for dinner before my shift and we'll talk properly, without her sticking her nose in,” he said, gesturing to Sarah’s room.
Kieran chuckled. Hassan walked over to Kieran, pulling him into a hug. He tried not to get choked up and quickly went to his bedroom. He had a lot to think about.