Chapter 24
Alex
“What do you want to watch?”
Elena looked at the DVDs they had. Alex didn't know what style of film she would choose. He feared something romantic and clichéd. Even if they usually had the same tastes, sooner or later she would force him to watch something like Titanic, wouldn’t she?
Elena pulled out Knights of the Zodiac. Oof.
“I didn't expect that.”
Elena smiled gently, observing the disc case.
“When we were little, my brother and I used to watch Knights of the Zodiac as we ate our breakfast before leaving for school.”
“I feared you'd choose a romantic movie. I’m relieved.”
Elena patted the top of his head before heading back to the bedroom. She moved around the house as if she were at home—a sight that made him so happy.
“Just because I'm a girl doesn't mean I like romantic movies by default. I don't particularly like mushy stuff. You should know that by now.”
Fair enough. Alex turned on the anime before turning back to Elena.
Seeing her lying on his bed was becoming a habit, and it was putting Alex in a tizzy.
He loved her so much, it was almost comical.
Alex took a deep breath and sat down on the bed as well.
While Elena's eyes were glued to the TV, Alex couldn't help but look at her.
At first, he'd been afraid their friendship would suffer once the truth about his past came out.
Everyone who had learned what had happened looked at him with sad eyes.
Elena had stayed the same. She didn't act like nothing had happened, but she also didn't treat him as if he was going to collapse as soon as anyone got near.
With her, he wasn't a victim or a reject.
He was just Alex. After a moment, she turned her head towards him, raising an eyebrow.
“Is there a reason you're staring at me like that?”
Without saying a word, Alex pressed his lips to hers. Realizing he'd just kissed her when she'd told him she wanted to wait, he expected her to push him away. Alex abruptly pulled back. By acting without thinking, he'd taken advantage of the situation and become the kind of guy he despised.
“I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that.”
Elena gave him a mischievous smile.
“I know I'm irresistible, but warn me next time.”
“You're not mad?”
She turned fully towards him, ignoring what was happening on the screen.
Elena put her hand on the back of Alex's neck and kissed him.
Gently at first, she became more confident as he kissed her back.
Elena lay on her back and drew Alex to her.
Lost in their own world, time had stopped.
Although they were friends first, kissing her made him feel like he belonged with her.
As if they were made for each other. What a cliché.
And yet, this strange girl had become his home, and being with her was as natural as breathing.
“Please close the door when you're going to do something dirty.”
Audrey gave them a nasty look while Elena laughed into his neck. They got up to face her.
“My bad. Sorry.”
He'd better close his door next time if they want peace. Unlike him, Elena didn't seem annoyed or uncomfortable.
“No, it’s my fault. I let myself be tempted by the devil. It won't happen again.”
“Did you just insinuate I'm a demon?”
“A beautiful demon. I want that to be clear.”
“So you really only like me for my looks, huh?”
Elena gave him a sidelong glance. “Surely you didn't think I'd be interested in something as trivial as your personality?”
Alex placed his hands on his heart, pretending to be hurt. He was becoming as dramatic as she was. Audrey's face contorted in disgust at their banter, and she closed the door.
“We should close this door more often if you're going to kiss me again,” she said, combing back her hair.
How could she be so calm when he was so nervous? Alex decided to lay his cards on the table. He needed to be honest. Elena was a drug.
“I'm selfish. Until you say stop, I'll take whatever I can get.”
Elena stared at him with her blue eyes, taking her time to think. She was hesitating whether or not to tell the truth.
“It's hard to resist when it’s you. I want you.”
That familiar bad feeling bubbled to the surface again. Elena noticed his confusion.
“Alex, what’s wrong?”
“I keep thinking something bad will happen. I'm afraid you'll pull away from me.”
“Why would you think that?”
Alex closed his eyes. Why was he so anxious?
He didn't know where this fear was coming from, only that the closer he became to Elena, the more he felt they'd never be together, and the thought made him nauseous.
His heart was loud in his temples. He gasped when Elena climbed onto his lap.
She placed her palms on his face. Every touch made him even more addicted to her, and she had no idea how much power she wielded over him.
“Alex, talk to me.”
He ran his hands through his hair. Breathe. She needed to know how he felt. He couldn't hide it from her anymore, even if she might not share his feelings. Alex just hoped his feelings wouldn't push her away. It didn't matter if she loved him or not; he didn't want to live without her anymore.
“I love you, and it terrifies me.”
Elena smiled so brightly that her eyes turned into crescent moons. Alex couldn't help smiling back, seeing her so happy. She rested her forehead against his.
“I wasn't going to tell you this now or like this, but it doesn't matter. I love you, too, Alex.”
His heart continued to beat wildly. She placed a kiss on his cheek, still beaming.
How could someone as good as her love someone like him?
His eyes burned. He wanted to cry happy tears.
Alex knew how much he loved her; he'd known it for a while.
And he'd accepted the fact that this love would only be one-sided because she was with him, and that was enough.
But to be loved by the person he cherished most seemed unreal.
Yet he couldn't deny it now that he knew.
Elena's eyes were filled with love and affection.
Love and affection for him. How had he never realized it before?
His fears vanished like snow in the sun.
Elena gently wiped away the tears that escaped.
He felt ridiculous crying in front of her, but couldn't stop the tears from falling.
“I wanted to do something cute to tell you.”
She was adorable. Knowing her, Elena would probably have given him flowers and a little card with a teddy bear on it. “See, you're a romantic!”
Elena pouted, her gaze playful. “Just because I don't like romance movies doesn't mean I'm not romantic.”
“Why me?”
He had to know. Elena took Alex's arms and placed them around her waist. It was kind of exciting when she was the one in charge.
“What?” she asked, taken aback.
“Why would you want to be with me and not someone else?”
“I don't know. It's... It's just you. My heart decided it would be you.”
A laugh left his lips. “That’s cheesy, even for you.
“I know. I'm ashamed of saying it out loud.” She hid her face in the crook of his neck, giggling.
“What if I'm not good enough?”
Elena became serious again. He knew he was going too fast. They weren't even together yet. Being the angel she was, Elena remained patient and reassured him.
“You know, Alex, it's never been about whether we're good enough for each other. It's about making efforts. I want to be the best version of myself so I can be with you, maybe you should try to do the same. And we'll work out the rest together.”
She lay down and beckoned him to join her. There was nothing he could refuse her, so he followed, watching her.
“You really think I can become better?”
“Yeah. You're already getting better every day. I just don't understand how you never realized I was crazy about you? We've been dancing around each other for months.”
Easy. Alex had always thought that no one could care about him that way. After his trauma, he'd lost himself to the point of believing he was no longer worthy. And yet, Elena loved him despite knowing everything about him.
“There's a difference between being interested and loving someone,” he simply said. “I thought you were just interested.”
“Believe me, I'm way past that stage. I'm totally, completely, madly, deeply in love with you. But don't worry, I don't mind reminding you every day.”
Had she always been so cheesy and corny?
This was a new side of Elena he couldn’t help but adore.
Elena was so calm. For once, Alex didn't hesitate and let her take the lead.
He, the control freak, was letting her take control of them, of him.
It was confusing, and it was frightening.
But he trusted her. Elena tried to read him.
“Does it bother you that I'm taking so long?” she asked, less confident. “Be honest.”
Alex pondered over the question. He'd never been in a relationship before.
With Elena, it was different. He felt excited about finally learning to be in a relationship.
As long as she was there, there was no rush.
Every moment together was worth it. Knowing she felt the same was more than he could have hoped for.
“Why would it?”
“You don't feel like I'm messing with your head, do you?”
“Love, take all the time you need. As long as I know you're as serious about us as I am, I can wait.”
Elena snuggled into his arms like a kitten. Her warmth enveloped him like a blanket.
“You're the best.”
“I know.”
***
Elena
“Elena, how are you?”
Alex's mother entered the kitchen, still dressed in her pyjamas.
“Good. You?”
No matter how many hours I spent in this house, I never felt at ease when Lexi was around. Yet she'd known me since I was born. Something about her presence always made me want to look down. When I was alone, she always seemed happier to see me than when I was with Alex.
“Good.”
Lexi sat opposite me, watching me in silence. This was getting uncomfortable. “Can I ask you something?”
I tried to hold her gaze, but it was hard. Anxiety gnawed at my inner peace. I shook my head and swallowed. Oh God, what had I done now?
“You and Alex can do what you want, you're old enough. But don't shock my youngest daughter.”
Oh no. My cheeks flushed. This was a misunderstanding, and I wanted to put things right. I didn't want my future mother-in-law to think I was spending my time at her place just to sleep with her son. Sure, we'd kissed, but that was all it had been.
“It's not what you think. We haven't...”
Lexi raised an eyebrow as she waited for me to finish my sentence.
I cleared my throat and resumed, “It's a misunderstanding. We haven't done anything. We kissed, but we don't intend to go further than that. Alex and I talked about it.”
Alex had just confessed his feelings. With both our pasts, taking our time was the right thing to do.
We were both insecure, and we both had trouble accepting someone else's affection.
I wanted us to build a relationship full of trust and patience.
Yes, sure, I also wanted amazing sex. I was just a girl with hormones, like everyone else.
But that would have to wait a little longer.
The first thing I had to do was pick up the pieces of my life and move on so I could get better.
“I'm just going to ask you not to get his hopes up, okay? Alex often acts aloof, but his heart is fragile.”
Sensing where she was going, I nodded and decided to be transparent. After all, she was my future mother-in-law, even if she did intimidate me at times.
“I know about his past.”
Her face paled. “He told you?”
I nodded again. Alex's mom ran her hands through her hair, her breathing heavy. I couldn't imagine how she must have felt about what had happened to him. “What do you think? Alex never wanted anyone to know. I'm surprised he decided to tell you.”
“It doesn't change anything for me. Alex is still Alex, and I love him the way he is.”
When she started crying, I wondered if I'd said something wrong. Lexi hugged me hard. I returned the embrace, feeling emotional too. For the first time in months, it felt like she was finally accepting me. Not for the little Elena of years ago, but for me.
“Take care of my son, okay?”
“What did you do to my mom?” Alex entered the kitchen with a suspicious look on his face.
His mom placed a kiss on my forehead. She winked at me, and the atmosphere in the kitchen became lighter again.
“Nothing. Just girl talk.”