11. Lydia
Lydia
JUNIOR YEAR OF HIGH SCHOOL
There’s no reason we should be forced to get up this early.
The sun wasn’t even up when my alarm went off the first time, and I feel like I got zero sleep.
My stomach twists with that dreadful feeling I always get when I have to go back to school.
It’s my junior year, and all I can think about is how close I’m getting to finally graduating and never having to come back to this place again.
I dread the first day of school every year.
Going a whole three months without having to deal with those kids makes me want to crawl back into bed and pretend to still be in my safe summer bubble.
But I can only hit snooze so many times before Sarah will come up to check on me, making sure I get up.
At least I have Eli this year.
I think we soaked up every second we could together this summer.
If I wasn’t with Simone, I was with Eli.
If Eli wasn’t with John, he was with me…
and most of the time we were all together.
Sadly, I didn’t get to see Katie and Harper as much this summer, but we all texted constantly.
I’m excited to see them more at school again.
I drag myself out of bed after my alarm goes off for the tenth time, and a FaceTime call comes through from Simone as soon as my feet hit the floor.
“Good morning, sunshine,” she says cheerfully.
I force my eyes open to look at her way-too-happy face. “It’s not normal to be this happy when the sun isn’t even fully up.”
“I feel like your energy level is extra high this morning, Lydia. What are you doing differently?”
“What gave it away?” I ask sarcastically.
She laughs. “Okay, so what are you wearing for the first day of junior year?”
I roll my eyes. “Literally whatever I pull out of this closet. I might even close my eyes and let the universe decide.”
Simone gasps in horror. “How do you not have something planned?”
“Because Simone…and let me say this in the simplest of terms. I. Do. Not. Care.”
“Ugh, are you always this gloomy? Wait—don’t answer that. I know when you’re not gloomy,” she says, tilting her head and raising a brow.
“Please,” I say, flatly, “enlighten me.”
She pauses for dramatic effect. “When Eli is inside of you—”
“SIMONE!” I shout, fully awake and horrified now.
She giggles on the other end. “Sorry! I couldn’t help it. He’s the only thing that keeps you happy these days. I can’t even compete.”
“Oh, please. You’re still my number one.”
“I better be. Chicks before di—”
“Simoneee,” I groan. “It’s too early. Now help me pick something to wear. I don’t want to do it.”
I flip the camera around so she can see the options.
“I’m staring at a pile of black clothes…”
“Okay?” I say, frustrated. “Pick.”
“At this point, Lydia…your idea of closing your eyes and randomly choosing would be more effective.”
“Fine,” I pout. “Eeny, meeny, miny—”
“You can’t be serious,” she says, interrupting my profound process of choice.
“I give up. I’m going back to bed.”
“Lydia House. You take your tail in that closet, grab a pair of leggings and a comfy crop, put them on, brush your teeth, and go have an amazing first day of junior year…because I can feel it…this year is going to be different for you. I just know it deep down.”
“Well, that was insightful,” I deadpan. “You should really look into becoming a motivational speaker.”
She places her hand over her heart as I watch her brush her teeth. “Maybe I will.” She pauses to spit out the toothpaste and then continues. “People would probably pay a lot of money to listen to me.”
“I would pay a lot of money to not listen right now.”
“Rude.”
“But I loveee you,” I sing-song.
“Mmm, I love you too.”
I see a text pop up on my phone from Eli telling me he’s here.
“Okay, Eli just texted that he’s here. Gotta go!”
“Call me when you get home today. I want to know how your day went.”
“Okay, Mom. Will do.”
She shakes her head and laughs. “Bye!”
“Bye.”
I hang up and call Eli quickly.
“Morning, babe.”
I smile into the phone. “Morning, I’m unlocking the door with my phone now. Just come up. I’m still getting ready.”
“How many times did you hit that snooze button?”
I fake think about it for a moment. “Like once? Okay, maybe four times.”
I can hear the sound of the door opening. “So…ten?” he says, laughing. “Okay, I’m in. I’m coming up.”
“Okay.”
I hang up and grab the pile of clothes off my bed, throwing them back in the closet. I’m still only wearing underwear, since I haven’t decided what to throw on yet.
I hear Eli walk into the room, and then it’s quiet. I’m still rummaging through clothes when I feel his hands sneak up on me, lifting me up and turning me around. I squeal, and then it turns into laughing when he kisses me.
“I think we could just skip first period,” he says, trailing his eyes over me.
I slap his arm lightly. “As much as I don’t want to go at all today. I really do need to get my schedule figured out this morning in first period.”
He groans into my neck and then kisses the same spot. “Fine.”
I shoo him out of the closet so I can finish getting ready, uninterrupted.
When I walk back out wearing almost exactly what Simone recommended—because she’s always right—I see Eli’s face drop a little.
“Really?” he asks.
I look up. “What?”
He points with his hand at my pants. “I thought we weren’t going to wear skin-tight pants out anymore.”
I instantly want to roll my eyes, but don’t wanna start a fight. “They’re just leggings, Eli.”
“Leggings that you can see your entire ass in. That’s what you want to show all the guys on the first day back?”
“Nobody is looking at that.”
“Every guy looks at that.”
I cross my arms. “So when you see a girl in leggings, you’re looking at her ass?”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You basically did.”
“I’m not arguing about this. It’s just respectful when you’re in a relationship not to purposefully show off your body.”
“I’m not purposefully doing anything, but whatever, babe.”
I go back into my closet, grabbing some high-waisted sweatpants and keeping my cropped tee on. When I come back out, he nods and holds the door open for me.
The ride to school is quiet.
“You okay?” he asks after a while.
“Yeah,” I say, looking outside the window. “Not really excited to go back.”
“There’s nothing to worry about. You’re gonna be fine.”
He reaches over and takes my hand. His thumb brushes over my knuckles like he always does when he wants me to feel better. “Are you staying with me for football practice after school?”
I nod. “Yeah.”
As we walk into school, holding hands, I feel the normal amount of eyes on us, but I just don’t have the energy to care as much this morning.
He walks me to my first class and then kisses me before heading to his.
When I walk into the room, I quickly scan to see who was in my class.
I’m pleasantly surprised when I see Katie sitting at a corner desk already, scrolling on her phone.
I quickly walk over to her, excited to have her in one of my classes.
“Hey!” I say, standing next to her desk.
She looks up, but doesn’t smile. “Hey.”
“I’m glad we have class together! How exciting?”
“Yeah…I guess,” she replies, looking back down at her phone.
I furrow my brows in confusion. “Is everything okay?”
She looks back up at me; her expression is pretty flat, and then she takes a deep, annoyed breath. “Yeah, just not in the mood this morning.”
“Did I do something wrong?”
She rolls her eyes. “Not everything is about you. The world doesn’t revolve around Lydia.”
Her tone takes me aback. It’s not just rude, but a little mean.
“Okay? Well, if there’s something wrong…you know you can always talk to me, right?”
“Sure.”
I don’t know what else to say, so I take my bag and walk over to another desk across the room, confused and kind of hurt now.
The first three periods go by pretty quickly, especially when I just keep my head down, focus on my work, and don’t talk to anyone. I’m happy when the bell rings, and it’s finally lunch period, so I can see Eli again.
We both grab our food and go sit down at a table together with a bunch of the other football players. He pulls me close to him as we settle in, and I can feel the eyes on me. This is the part I hate…being under a microscope by the popular kids.
A bunch of the guys also have their girlfriends sitting with them and they’re all talking and laughing together.
I try to jump into some of their conversations casually, but after getting completely ignored and stared at like the outcast, I just give up.
Eli doesn’t notice at first, busy talking to John, but when I whisper to him, telling him how uncomfortable I am, he takes me in his arms, tucks his head into my neck, and whispers, “Don’t pay attention to them.
They just don’t know how to be as cool as you and are jealous. ”
I let out a sarcastic laugh. “Yeah, I don’t think that’s it.”
He gives me his attention for the rest of lunch, and I appreciate the way he always tries to reassure me.
I tell him about how weird Katie was this morning, and he just tells me that’s why he doesn’t like girls like her, that they don’t actually care about me.
I brush him off, telling him there’s probably something going on I just don’t know about.
I don’t want her to be mad at me or anything, and he tells me I shouldn’t care so much if she obviously doesn’t.
I let it go because he doesn’t like her anyway; of course, he’d rather I just not care, but she’s my friend, I do care.
The rest of the day goes by just as fast as it started, and I’m thankful to not have anything else bad happen before the day is over.
After the last bell rings, I head out to the field and sit down in the bleachers, pulling out some of my homework and my phone.
I see the guys come out, and Eli instantly finds me, waving and winking at me, making me blush.
I try to focus on getting some work done, but I keep looking up, watching Eli practice, and smiling back at him when he smiles at me.