Chapter 16
Not even a bath at a curing pool washes away all the blood from my skin. As suspected, the urge to inflict more damage than Briar’s father could withstand was a hard-fought battle. Every time he lost consciousness, I wanted to tear the skin from his bones and allow maggots to fester in his open wounds, but I doubt the male would have survived it.
As it was, the healer had to stop my torture twice because I nearly killed him before I finally left, feeling completely unsatisfied with Gary’s screams. For now, I’ll have to be content with the knowledge that the low-level demon charged with keeping Gary alive will take nearly as much pleasure from tormenting him as I do.
I’m barely dry when I dress in fresh clothing, eager to return to the institute. I could have cleaned up in my room there, but I didn’t want to taint the space with his blood. Briar should never have to think of her father again, let alone see anything that belongs to him, even if it’s evidence of his pain.
With all the protections in and around the property, I’m forced to walk the remaining distance to the school on foot after getting as close as the wards will allow. I look up, counting the windows until I’m focused on the glass separating me from Briar. It’s still early enough that I’m certain she’s in her room, but I feel a swell of panic pushing me to move faster to get to her.
Movement through one of the windows on a lower floor catches my eye just in time for me to see someone’s silhouette as they step away from the window. I wasn’t expecting anyone to be moving around at this hour, especially near the classrooms, since education won’t begin for hours.
By the time I enter the building, the fleeting thoughts of who is roaming around are already gone. I’m too focused on the fact that it takes me longer to get up a couple flights of stairs than it did to traverse all the miles to her village.
I catch her scent when I’m in the hall, and my heart thuds hard in my chest. When my hand lands on her door, every cell in my body burns with the need to see her. The knob doesn’t twist, even when I apply extra strength. Damn it, I have no right to be pissed she followed my orders and locked herself in, but that doesn’t stop me from cursing the fucking metal.
I slam my fist on the door separating us several times, and the resounding booms roll through the stone corridors like a train. After two breaths, I lift my hand again, ready to pound even harder, but the door is wrenched open by a drowsy Briar. She blinks her heavy-lidded gold eyes, trying in vain to keep them open for longer than a millisecond.
I don’t give her time to prepare for my invasion. I’m not even sure if I would be capable anyway. I wrap my arms around her tiny form and haul her up against my chest as I slam the door behind me.
She smells divine, like honeysuckle from the heavens. It’s not until she stiffens in my arms that I realize I’m tasting her skin with my lips and tongue, my gums aching with the need to claim her.
As much as I want her in my arms and need to touch her, Briar’s needs will always trump my own, and right now, her racing heart and rigid limbs tell me this isn’t what she wants. I lower her down my body, unintentionally moaning when her softness slides over my hard cock. Her face is flushed a pretty pink when she takes a step back. I also notice the demon lurking in the shadowy corner of her room, but I don’t acknowledge him.
“You came back,” she rasps out, then clears her throat.
“Of course I came back.” It dawns on me then that while I did leave the demon to watch over her, she didn’t know that, nor did I tell her I would be away. I never once thought about her needing to eat or anything else for that matter, only keeping her safe from harm.
“I had something small I needed to tend to.” I give the justification without prompting, which isn’t normal. I hate explaining myself.
“Okay.” She seems agreeable, but she still has her gaze trained on my neck, as if she’s afraid to look me in the eye.
“I came to you as soon as I returned.”
She reaches up with one hand and grabs the side of her neck, the same area I kissed just a few moments ago. “You did?” She sounds surprised by my admission. It makes me question if she understands what it means to be mated, which makes me want to gut her father all over again for keeping her in the dark.
“Yes, I did. Was it hard for you while I was away?” I’m trying to lead her to understand our building bond.
“I wasn’t sure what, if anything, I should do, but I bathed and went to get something to eat,” she supplies readily, as if she wanted to be the first to tell me as much.
“No one bothered you?” I question, stepping closer and closing the distance she put between us.
Her bottom lip caves in when she nibbles on it. “No, but I got turned around on the way back and wound up being somewhere I wasn’t supposed to be.”
“Where was that?” I reach for her hair, pulling the silky strands through my fingers.
“I don’t know, the instructor just said we shouldn’t be there.”
My eyes bounce to hers instead of focusing on her plump lips. “We?”
She fidgets, touching each fingertip to her palm, but she doesn’t try to escape me. “Kage, the male who came looking for you. Maybe he was looking for you again, or maybe he was following me?” Her brows furrow as if she’s confused. “It very well could have been just a coincidence that he showed up in the same place.”
The tension in my shoulders eases, and I resume petting her hair. “We can discuss the demon later. Who told you that you were somewhere you shouldn’t be?” I can think of many places the novices are not permitted, but I still want to know who thinks they can tell my mate where to be.
“I don’t remember her name or if he even told me it, but Ka—the demon knows.” She leans forward and whispers, “I don’t think she was supposed to be there either.”
I get distracted by her actions, and it takes me a moment to process what she said. “What makes you say that?”
“He told me, or I think that’s what he was hinting at. Oh, he said she had a nature ability,” she answers eagerly.
“Are you still tired?” I’m no longer interested in who the instructor is or where they were. That’s something I can ask the demon later.
Briar shrugs one delicate shoulder. “Is there something I should be doing?”
There are a million things I would like her to do to me, or more importantly, that I would like to do to her, but I settle on asking, “Would you come with me?”
She begins nodding, but then realizes what I said. “You’re asking?”
“It seems I am, though I wouldn’t get used to it.” At least I’m capable of being honest.
“I took my boots off,” she replies, as if to explain why she can’t leave this very moment.
“Do you usually sleep with your boots on?” My question was made in jest to show I think she’s being impractical.
“Yes, but I thought it would be okay with the door locked.” She leans to the left, looking around me, probably for her boots.
I grab her shoulders and direct her attention to me. “Why?”
“I didn’t think anyone could steal them with the door locked.”
“That was a concern before?” I’m not sure why this surprises me. Hell, the boots she wore when she arrived were two sizes too small, but she crammed her feet into them anyway.
“For me it was,” she admits.
Rage simmers in my soul. If I were able to shift to her father’s prison from here, I would already be gone. Instead, I begin to make a list for the next time I see him. First, I’m going to saw off his toes one by one, then force him to wear shoes that are five sizes too small until his feet rot off from lack of blood flow and infection. After he heals, I’ll do it all over again.
“Ziv?” My name on her lips pulls me from my dark thoughts. I feel her tiny fingers prying at my fist as blood weeps between my fingers. The crescent-shaped cuts from my nails heal almost immediately, leaving my palm with a tiny amount of drying blood I wipe off on my pants.
“You don’t need to sleep with your boots on anymore, little flower. No one will ever take anything from you again,” I vow.
Her lips curl in a half smile, but it looks more sad than anything else. “Sure, okay,” she agrees easily, and I know she thinks I’m full of shit. I want to prove how wrong she is and make her believe me, but it’s her breezy acceptance that stops me, that and the sorrow shining in her eyes. There’s nothing I could say that would convince her, but I will show her she can trust me. It will just take time.
A glazed look washes over Ziv’s features, and at first, I just stay still and quiet, not wanting to disturb him, but when blood drips from his hand, I can no longer stand idly by. I say his name more than once, but he doesn’t give any indication he can hear me, so I place my fingers on the back of his hand as gently as I can. I really don’t want to startle him and end up tossed like the mattress. When that doesn’t stir him, I say his name again, much louder, and work to open his fist.
He finally blinks and unlocks his fingers curled into his palms. I release my hold as quickly as possible and give him room to breathe as I stand back. “You don’t need to sleep with your boots on anymore, little flower. No one will ever take anything from you again.”
His words make me smile, even if I don’t believe them. “Sure, okay. Give me a second.” I excuse myself to get away from him as fast as I can before I do something stupid, like throw my arms around his waist to hug him for being too nice. I pretend I have to find my shoes, but I know exactly where they are. I just wanted an excuse not to stare at him for a few seconds. My head is filling with stupid fuzzy thoughts a female like me has no business entertaining.
When my shoes are laced and I feel like I can look at Ziv without conveying my thoughts, I tell him, “I’m ready.”
He tips his chin up and makes a grumbly sound. “You’ll be with me for the rest of the day,” he says, looking past me at the corner of the room. I glance in that direction, as if he could be talking to someone else, but then I remember we’re alone.
Without another word, he turns, hauls the door open, and looks under his arm, expecting me to exit in front of him. I scamper ahead, ducking under his arm, even though I don’t need to, and wait for him in the hall.
The corridor is eerily empty as he guides me through the building. I wish I could say I’m getting a hang of the layout, but I would be lying. I didn’t intentionally find myself in an area I shouldn’t have been in last night, I really thought I was on my way back to my cell. It doesn’t help that I never seem to pay attention when I should be. I get so easily distracted by my company or lost in my thoughts. Even now, I know we’ve gone up at least two flights of stairs, but it could be more, and I have no idea in which direction.
I stop when Ziv does, standing near a wooden door without any other identifying marks. He places his palm on the center of the wood, and I hear the latch click open.
He pushes the door in and steps back, inviting me to go in first. The room is dark, making me glance over at him with wide eyes, hoping he will go ahead of me, but he just waits patiently.
“Trust me,” he says, but there’s a softness to his tone that implies he’s also asking. Keeping my eyes on his face, I step one foot into the dark space, then the other. I search the obscurity, not feeling as uneasy as I would have thought, especially when I inhale. It smells like sweet dark cherries and almonds—Ziv.
I glance over my shoulder just in time to see him step in behind me and seal the door shut. Warm light builds until I can make out every corner of the expansive space and everything in it, which isn’t much. There’s a squishy seating area with lots of pillows along the wall, and a wooden table low enough to put your feet on in front of a chair that looks large enough to actually hold Ziv. “Did you have that specially made?” I blurt out.
He does that grunting thing in response and tells me, “Take your boots off.” I don’t waste time wondering if he’s aggravated with me in general, or if it’s my shoes in particular that pissed him off.
While I’m bent over, unlacing my boots, he moves past me and disappears through an open door. I take the opportunity to look around again, trying to catch any details I may have missed, but the room is just as barren of personal items as my own. If it wasn’t for his scent being so strong, I wouldn’t guess this was his room at all.
I use the side of my foot to line up my boots near the wall while I wait for Ziv to return and explain what we’re doing here. Long seconds pass with only soft shuffling sounds emanating from the direction he went. Eventually, he emerges from the room, and my mouth drops open before I get a chance to turn my head away and avert my eyes. Ziv has removed his leather pants and tunic, leaving him bare from the waist up, and his thin linen bottoms don’t do much in the way of concealment. If it wouldn’t draw too much attention to myself, I would cover my heated cheeks with my hands to hide the flush, but I’d much rather pretend the image of him and his perfect body aren’t ingrained in my head.
“Are you hungry?” he questions, as if walking around nearly nude is absolutely normal.
“Um…”
“I don’t have much here, but I could get something for you.”
“I’m okay.” My voice is too high, too airy. I’m embarrassing myself, but what if he’s expecting something from me, like sex? Would I be okay with that? Would I even have a choice not to be?
I glance over my shoulder just in time to see Ziv lean over the seating area and move the pillows around. At first, all I can see are muscles etched to perfection, but then my eyes begin to take in the details, and I notice scars crisscrossing his back. Some are long, thick lines, while others resemble scratches a few shades lighter than his warm skin tone. I wonder what could have left its mark on a god. There’s no revulsion when I look upon him, no nagging desire for me to get out of the room as fast as I can. In fact, I feel drawn to him. I want to feel all those scars under my fingertips and learn what each one of them tastes like, and most importantly, I want him to tell me how he got them and if he killed the person responsible for hurting him.
Without a peek in my direction, he drops onto the low seating area, immersing himself in the pillows scattered like a big nest. It’s the first time his movements haven’t seemed almost otherworldly, smooth, and flawless.
“Come here, little flower. I promise not to bite.”
My stomach drops at his low, husky tone, and then his words register, and something deep inside me clenches. I wouldn’t mind if Ziv bit me at all, especially if he let me return the favor. I can still recall what he tasted like, and I swear his blood sated me way more than any food could have.
I make it to the far edge of the lounge and kneel on the pad, pretending not to notice the way his eyes haven’t strayed from me other than to blink since he lay down. I settle with my back propped against a pillow with a good amount of space between us. Ziv’s hand snakes over and grabs just above my knee. I make a startled sound when he hauls me closer to him, dislodging all the cushions that were between us.
My heart thunders in my chest, but it isn’t from fear. I would be lying if I said nerves didn’t play a role though. Ziv doesn’t release my thigh, his fingers curling even farther around my leg, but he lowers his head back to the pillow just on the other side of my hip and exhales. “I put a protection rune on the door, so no one will be able to enter.” His voice is still husky, but there’s a note of drowsiness now too. I think he’s going to sleep. I’m not sure if I’m surprised or disappointed, but when he nuzzles his face deeper into the pillow and I feel his warm breath on my leg as he cuddles closer, calmness settles over me.
Having him this close feels right.
It only takes minutes for his breathing to become slow and deep. The weight of his arm on my leg increases, effectively pinning me to the lounge while he slumbers. Eventually, my fingers find their way into his hair at the back of his head. Without warning, he makes a grunting sound and moves even closer, so his head is practically in my lap. I stop breathing for all of three seconds, until I realize he’s still sound asleep.
A loud noisestartles me awake. I’m so disoriented, it takes way too long for me to realize I’m flat on my back with Ziv leaning over me. His eyes are wide open, and all traces of sleep are gone, but something tells me he’s just as confused as I am. My back is hot, telling me I’ve been in this position for a while. The fact that I can feel the skin on his chest slipping across my somehow exposed belly is even more proof. Damn, he’s hot, and not because he’s gorgeous. His temperature must run higher than mine, or maybe he’s sick.
“Are you well?” I brush the back of my palm over his forehead, and his eyelids slowly lower. “Should I call for a healer?”
Ziv lowers his head until his face hovers right over my breasts. “Ignore them,” he mutters, and I feel his nose trail up under my chin before he nuzzles into my neck.
“Who?” I chirp. This position should feel dangerous, since there’s a fallen god at my throat, but the only thing that feels worrisome is him backing away.
“Whoever is at the door.” As if on cue, the pounding sound that must have woken me starts again, but Ziv ignores the sound and inhales deeply. “You smell like home.” I feel his lips against my skin with each word, and it sends a thrill of excitement through me, but the way he says I smell like home is so sweet, as if he’s never experienced anything better, and makes my chest feel all gooey, like I want to sigh.
The wall actually rattles with the next round of pounds, and Ziv regrettably removes his face from my neck to look over his shoulder as a rumble leaves his chest.
“I’ll get rid of them.” He scowls before hopping up in one fluid movement that reminds me what he is. A flash of light forces me to shield my eyes with my arm, and then the door flies open.
There’s a man poised to slam his fist on the door again, but Syrinx swats him away with a wave of her long, thin arm. I watch her eyes roam over Ziv’s bare chest, and a sharp pang of annoyance has me balling my hands into fists.
“What?” Ziv barks.
“We have a problem.” The headmistress still hasn’t taken her eyes off Ziv.
“We don’t have anything. If you have a problem, deal with it.” Ziv lowers his head a little, but if anything, it makes his stance even more intimidating, and I can only see his back.
“If that’s how you feel, then I’ll find the girl and question her myself.” Syrinx tries to sound breezy, but it’s ruined by the fact that she’s speaking through clenched teeth.
“What girl?” Ziv doesn’t even sound mildly interested, but the fact that he asked the question at all proves he is. Clearly, he’s much better at concealing his approach than Syrinx.
“Briar. She’s not in her room, and she has some explaining to do.”
“About what exactly?”
Ziv shifts to the side. At no point did I feel like he was hiding my presence, since Syrinx was just too focused on him to notice me, but I get the impression he doesn’t want her to see me now. The man who knocked on the door had a clear view of me, and it almost looks like he’s going to interrupt Syrinx before she has a chance to answer Ziv’s question when he opens his mouth, but the headmistress silences him with a lifted palm in his direction.
I make eye contact with the man, and I swear I see the gears of his mind working as he tries to decide what to do. If he speaks against her wishes, it could get him in trouble, but if he doesn’t, it might be worse. I see the moment he chooses to keep his mouth shut. He shifts his body in a way so I’m no longer in his direct line of sight and averts his gaze. I bet he’s going to play dumb, like he didn’t see me at all. I probably would have done the same thing to save my own ass.
“A dead student was found this morning.”
“What does that have to do with Briar?” Ziv crosses his arms over his chest.
“Everything when she was the one to kill him. Deaths while training are an acceptable consequence, but this was malicious and without reason.”
“What makes you think it was her?”
“I’m not aware of anyone else at this school who would be capable of draining someone else dry, even stripping their essence and leaving only a husk behind.”
“I can’t do that,” I voice from the lounge, wishing I kept my mouth shut when Ziv does a slow turn to look in my direction.
Syrinx steps to the side to look around the male, spying me among the cushions. Her face slips into a sneer before she darts her gaze back to Ziv, and she accuses, “She is a novice.”
“She is mine,” he argues with just as much venom in his tone.
“Then are you accepting responsibility for what she did?”
“I didn’t do anything,” I protest while trying to dislodge myself from the lounge and all the pillows. I’m sure I look like a newborn foal, hobbling around on my knees.
“And yet a novice is dead, killed exactly as other voids have killed in the past,” she deadpans.
“Voids… That’s what you call me, and there are others?” I glance between Syrinx and Ziv, feeling very small and insignificant, considering how little I know.
“Not for a long time,” Ziv answers, still looking at the headmistress when he does so. “And you don’t know if that’s exactly how they were killed, you only know someone wanted it to seem like it was.”
Syrinx narrows her eyes on the fallen god who is defending me. “I suppose you’re going to tell me it couldn’t have been her since she was with you?”
“Why would I lie? We both know I just returned this morning.”
I glance at his profile. He didn’t mention he left the institute, but what bothers me more is that Syrinx clearly knew he was gone and I didn’t. Nothing about that feels right.
“Then you should have no problem with me questioning her alone, so we can get to the bottom of this,” the headmistress challenges with a plastic smile.
Ziv pivots to face me, leaving his back exposed to Syrinx and the other male. Either he trusts her or is powerful enough to know neither of them pose a threat to him. I want it to be the second option. “Did you kill anyone?” He’s searching my face as if the answer doesn’t matter, but he still needs to know.
“No.” I shake my head in denial.
“Do you know anything about the death of another novice?”
“No,” I answer quickly but honestly.
“I don’t see much of a reason for you to question her at all. She doesn’t know anything about it.” Ziv keeps his eyes on me, but it’s clear he’s talking to Syrinx.
“Forgive me for not placing my unmitigated trust in her as you clearly have, Ziveet.”
Ziv’s shoulders roll back, and he seems to become even larger when he returns his attention to the other female. “Tread lightly, Syrinx. Invoking my name will not earn you any leniency from me.”
“I’m not seeking leniency for anything, but I am expecting your cooperation in this. One of my most promising novices is dead, and I want an explanation.”
“I’ll talk to her.” I touch Ziv’s arm to get his attention. It feels important to deescalate the situation between them, even if it’s only so I don’t become collateral damage.
“It was never your choice,” Syrinx chimes in.
“I’m very accustomed to that, not much is.” If it were up to me, I wouldn’t be here at all.
The headmistress runs her eyes up and down my figure, probably trying to assess what threat I pose before finally saying, “Come along.” When Ziv moves to stand at my back, making it clear he’s planning to follow, she huffs out a breath and adds, “If you insist on attending the girl, then I insist you are decent.” Her brow arches as if she’s rebuking Ziv.
Strangely enough, I agree with her on this. There’s no part of me that wants Ziv roaming around shirtless, but not because he’s indecent. In fact, my reason for wanting him dressed is the complete opposite.
I jump when he wraps his thick fingers around my wrist and hauls me toward the door he disappeared through earlier. I’m not surprised to find a bedroom, and that literally describes the room. The mattress is just a few inches up from the floor, and it covers nearly the entire space, leaving only enough room to walk around three of the four sides and an open aisle that leads to yet another door. I nearly trip as I try to keep up with him. When we’re standing in his personal bathing chamber, he finally releases me.
I ring my fingers around the wrist he gripped to ease the pinch of his tight hold. His eyes dip down to watch the movement, and his brows furrow. “You are too fragile,” he states instead of apologizing for his rough treatment. I wouldn’t expect anything else.
“I can’t help the way I was made any more than you can.”
That makes his lips pinch. “Did you kill anyone?” he asks again in a hushed tone.
“No,” I answer. “I thought you believed me.”
“I do, which is good. It means they will too, but I need to be sure. If you did kill them, just make sure they know it was in self-defense.” He reaches over and grabs a shirt without even looking and slips it over his head.
“Well, I didn’t.” I cross my arms over my chest.
“I don’t care if you kill the entire lot of them.” He grabs my face between his hands and stares into my eyes. “I just need to know so I can protect you.”
“I didn’t kill anyone,” I promise, though it sounds a little dreamy. No one has ever protected me, and the thought of it actually makes me all gooey with emotions I don’t want or need.
“Then I probably won’t need to kill anyone either,” he says conversationally.
“Probably?”
He shrugs one heavy shoulder, then leans forward. I know what he’s about to do, and my stomach flips in response. The urge to lick my lips becomes unbearable, so the underside of my tongue ends up swiping across his lip right before he places his mouth against mine. Neither of us move for a heartbeat. I think I surprised us both.
I open my mouth to apologize, but he chooses that exact moment to slide his fingers into my hair and slip his tongue into my mouth. My breath catches in my throat, but it’s nothing compared to the swarm of butterflies flipping in my stomach. When his tongue brushes over mine, a foreign heaviness settles low in my belly.
“I don’t have the patience for insolence,” Syrinx announces loud enough that I have to wonder if she’s standing right behind me.
Heeding the warning, Ziv slows the kiss I would have easily called desperate only seconds before, then he nips my lip. I find myself lifting up on my toes to stay with him just a breath longer when he finally pulls away.
Opening my eyes feels like a burden, but when I find the strength to do it, I’m rewarded by the sight of Ziv. His silver eyes are bright and swirling with an intensity that matches what I’m feeling. His hands are still in my hair, holding me as if he doesn’t want to let me go.
“If I kill her, I will be obligated to take over Ivy, and I have no desire to run this school, especially now.” His words are spoken low, almost as if he’s speaking to himself, or maybe he’s concerned about her overhearing, but I nod in acknowledgment. “Answer her questions quickly, little flower, or I may end up slaughtering her for the interruption anyway.”
I place my finger over his lips, afraid the headmistress will hear his threat. “Don’t say that.”
His eyelids lower, and he nips the end of my finger, causing me to jerk my hand back. “She understands the magnitude of getting between a male and his mate, especially one that hasn’t yet fully bonded. Now go, little flower, before I decide to claim you right now.”
“Do you really think I’m your mate?” I ask, even though I know it isn’t the right time or place.
“I don’t think, Briar. I know.” He plants a hard kiss on my lips as if to punish me for even posing the question, then backs away. I feel discombobulated without his touch, as if he were the only thing grounding me. Seeming to understand, Ziv holds my hand again and pulls me from the room, just as Syrinx starts toward the door to come after us. It really wasn’t smart to keep her waiting.