11. Chapter 11
Chapter 11
Julie
The bar hums alive the later it gets in the evening. Today, Vatok isn't here with me. There are patrons around the bar counter, waiting for their drinks. I keep serving their orders, but without Vatok around, something feels off. It has been a while since we started pretending to be mates and it has been good, except... sometimes, it still feels wrong in some way.
The familiar blend of laughter and distant chatter amplifies in Vatok's absence, which doesn’t sit right with me. I wipe my brow, feeling the warmth of the bustling crowd on my skin while the air is thick with the sweet and spicy aroma of ingredients for different drinks mingling together.
I stare at the bottles sitting in front of me, stealing the moment of the empty counter to...
Is Vatok fine?
I know his job is demanding, but he seems to be getting more tired recently. Is everything still good?
That night... Since the night, when he was too tired to talk to me or stay with me, it feels like something isn't right anymore. But he isn't telling me anything.
Now that I think about it... He and I... Even though we stay together now, is that... real?
I know he's real. I can hug him and feel his warmth. His... thick cock is real too, yet...
For him, is everything fake?
I swallow when my throat tightens at the thought. Our relationship's meant to be fake. Maybe he remembers that better than me. Sometimes, I no longer know what's real and what's not.
Was the kiss we shared when we left for our respective work real? Was the peck on the forehead before bed real?
Is everything fake, like how it's supposed to be?
But...
I take a breath. There's a time and place to be thinking about that, which isn't now.
Not to mention, there's no reason I have to think about what's in his mind that much. Even though what we have between us is muddy, it doesn't get to interfere with my work. I can function perfectly fine regardless.
Or... that's supposed to be the case.
I tilt my head back for a brief moment, allowing the energy of the room to wash over me. I've been fine even before Vatok and I get close with each other and there's no reason for me to be slacking off just because he isn't around.
Even though I like the guy, I can't let him have such power over me.
“Two Galactic Colas and a Nebula Lemonade!” I call out, sliding the drinks down the counter towards a table of giggling winged ones who are energetically debating the best planet to vacation on. Their cheers ring in my ears, and I give them a grateful smile, even when the weight of the night starts pulling at my eyelids.
As I pour another drink, a more persistent patron sidles up to me, leaning in too close with a smirk that sends a shiver down my spine. “So, Julie, how about I take you out for a drink sometime? Just the two of us? I know all the best spots in the galaxy.”
My pulse quickens, frustration bubbling just beneath the surface. “Thanks, but I’m with someone already. Don't want to make him mad."
His smirk falters, but he leans even closer, oblivious to the spark of annoyance flaring in my chest. “Oh really? I don’t see him around here. Are you sure he's not just another one of those ‘party boys’ who won’t appreciate the finer things in life?”
I roll my eyes, plastering a charming smile on my face despite the irritation. “Trust me, my guy sure knows how to enjoy a night out. He’d likely put you in your place before you even had a chance to finish that drink.” I grab a cocktail shaker, shaking my head as I add a colorful swirl to the mix. “Maybe someone else will be interested in you; I've got work to do.”
He huffs, but steps back, clearly not enjoying the lack of attention. As he disappears into the crowd, I let out a sigh of relief, shaking off the tension that had begun to creep up my spine.
But the moment of victory is short-lived. The bar continues to thrum with life, laughter, and chatter, yet my heart feels strangely unsettled. I can’t help but glance at the entrance, hoping to see that familiar outline of Vatok cutting through the chaos. Maybe it’s more than just the fun times he brings; his presence is a comfort against the tide of unwanted advances and the general absurdity of the evening.
But I'm not supposed to do that. I don't want to rely on him for my sense of safety. That one time I asked him to pretend to be my mate is meant to be... a one-time thing. It was for the convenience, yet...
I really should put myself together and deal with creepers with my own hands. Or at times, with the help of the bouncer, who is a strong guy too.
I pour a Nebula Punch and set it in front of a small, multi-horned being who gives a genuine grin in return. Even though some patrons are creeps, most of them are nice beings who are just here to have fun with their friends.
As I try to focus on the positive interactions, I find my mind drifting again, replaying the moments Vatok and I shared. it feels like our relationship has turned into something more, something real, but...
Maybe he has been playing along. A handsome one like him who has a good and well-respected job won't care about someone like me.
Even though I like working here, being a bartender isn't the most respected role. Beings think that someone like me has shady business somewhere. Or I'm just here to flirt with everyone taking a seat on the stools, never serious about anything.
But I don't. While I enjoy chatting and banter, I'm not very flirtatious.
"Hi, Julie, how are you?"
I grit my teeth when I realize Targoth is here again. With the creepy grin on his face, he hasn't learned his lesson. Maybe he's here as soon as he figured out that Vatok isn't around. I plaster on my professional smile, reminding myself that this is part of the job. "I’m great, Targoth! What can I get for you tonight?" My tone is light, but internally I’m bracing for his classic attempts to charm me.
He leans on the bar, his scales shimmering under the neon lights. "How about that drink I suggested the other night? Something special?"
“Sure, I can whip you up something unique.” How do I keep the conversation moving without inviting more of his unwelcome advances? I turn to the shelves, reaching for a bottle of Zalorian spice-infused liquor while glancing toward the entrance, half-hoping to catch a glimpse of Vatok walking in. Though I know he's not going to be here when his shift will stretch all the way through the evening.
“You know,” Targoth continues, “if you'd just give me a chance, I could show you the very best that the universe has to offer. Forget about that kot'oll you think is so great. I could treat you much better.”
I set the bottle down a little harder than intended. “Targoth, listen. I’m not interested, okay? You're nice and all, but I like my current situation just fine.” I straighten up, trying to project confidence despite the creeping discomfort in my stomach.
He smirks, leaning closer, “But what does he really offer? A boring routine? Rules, regulations—”
"My relationship isn't your business."
His expression falters for just a moment before he quickly masks it with his usual smirk. “You think you know him, but what do you really know?”
“More than you think,” I shoot back. “Unlike some patrons, he actually respects me.”
Targoth’s brow furrows slightly, his bravado wavering. “Is that so? Respect doesn’t fill your stomach or get you the best seats at the Nightglow Festival.”
Vatok's never going to one of those; he doesn't feel like the kind of being who loves noisy places. The irony stings, but I won’t let him rattle me. “And a bad attitude certainly won’t endear you to anyone either. If you don’t mind, I have patrons who appreciate my time. I’d rather not waste it on someone who can’t take ‘no’ for an answer.” I turn my back and focus on pouring another drink, willing my unease to seep away with the steady flow of the bright, glittering liquid.
I shoot the bouncer a look. He is a big nekrozzro with horns and scales, not to mention strong arms. He catches my gaze and nods, getting ready in case I need more help.
Targoth looks around, seemingly sensing the change in the air. "Fine, just know that I'll be around." He takes his drink and leaves me alone, which I hope will last.
I keep my eyes fixed on the counter, forcing myself to breathe steadily. The laughter and chatter of the bar swirl around, creating an illusion of comfort, but without Vatok's imposing presence nearby, the weight of the evening presses down harder on my shoulders.
The crowd of patrons ebbs and flows, and I finally take a moment to regroup as I serve a couple of friendly patrons at the far end. They’re genuine, laughing and enjoying each other’s company; the type of beings who remind me why I love this job despite the drama.
I lean in, pouring them each a Nebula Fizz, enjoying the lightness of the moment wash over me. “So, what are your plans tonight? Any adventures on the horizon?” I ask, prompting their eager tales about a recent trip to Utta, an exotic planet shimmering with ambitious nightlife and strange culinary delights.
As they share stories that evoke warmth, there's a bittersweet twinge. My mind drifts back to Vatok, to his gentle smirk and the way his eyes light up when we banter. Does he feel the same pull? These thoughts grow heavier with each passing moment that Targoth's smirking face lingers in my mind.
Maybe I shouldn't waste Vatok's time. He's probably around because he's a nice guy who truly wanted to help and make sure I'll be fine. I'm stronger than needing protection left and right. He doesn't have to be here when he can be out there getting to know a female of his choice. I...
Even though I'd want to give our relationship a real try, maybe I shouldn't. We shouldn't.
The evening is long. When I can finally catch my breath, my shift is almost over. I take one last glance around the bar, surveying the remnants of the night: crumpled napkins, half-empty glasses, and laughter that now echoes faintly in my ears. The weight of the day settles on my shoulders, making it tempting to head home early. I lean back on my stool, allowing my tired body to relax for a moment.
But my phone buzzes, jolting me from my thoughts.
“Julie.” Vatok’s voice comes, deep and stern. “I hope I’m not interrupting. I... wanted to check in.”
“Hey, Vatok. Not at all, I was just winding down for the night.”
His tone sends a swirl in my stomach, and I sit a bit straighter on my stool. It feels like something bad's about to happen.
“I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something,” he continues, and a knot forms in my stomach. “With work being so demanding lately... and all the crazy shifts, I think it’s best if we... adjust how we interact for a while.”
“Adjust? What do you mean?” I don't like that word.
“Look, it’s not that I don’t enjoy our time together.” He pauses, the brief moment of silence heavy on my shoulders. “But I need to focus on my responsibilities. More importantly, you deserve someone who will love you. I can't always be around you, and for you to still find that someone."
A chill runs down my spine, and my heart drops. “Hey... I..."
“I think we are too different. Like... It's not supposed to be how it currently is, right?”
The words twist like a knife in my gut. “But we've been having fun, right?” I strive to add a note of hopefulness, but the tremor in my voice betrays me.
“It has been, but... feelings can complicate everything. I just want to make sure you’re okay.”
I look around the bar, even as tears threaten to burst out of me. I hope no one sees this and thinks that I'm breaking up with Vatok, whatever that means when the two of us technically have never been dating.
“Okay,” I finally manage to say, my voice barely a whisper. “Thanks for your help that day. It means a lot.”
I don't need him.
I'd been fine before we pretended to be mates.
I don't need him.
I don't need anyone to be fine.
I grit my teeth, but bitterness wells in my stomach. Am I mad at him?
Except I don't even have ground to stand on to be mad.
There’s a painful silence between us, stretching longer than I want it to. My heart races, pounding loudly in my ears as I stare at the bar’s warped surface, its sheen reflecting the chaos of my internal struggle. Each word he said settles like stones in my stomach, heavy and unyielding.
“Julie,” there’s a tightness in his voice that further twists the knife lodged in my gut. “If I’d been clearer before—”
“No, it’s fine. I understand. You’re busy, and we... we were just pretending, after all. It was meant for that one time anyway.”
I squeeze my eyes shut, fighting against the bubbling tears in me. It gets hard to even remain seated on the stool without hunching over and cry.
I can’t let him drag this out any longer. “Look, I gotta go. My shift just ended and I need to clean up.” I cut him off before he can respond with anything that might hurt more than it already has. “Take care, Vatok.”
Before he can reply, I end the call.
Targoth's shadow looms again, this time with a knowing look that leaves me cold. My heart still thrums with leftover emotion, and I lock eyes with him, refusing to let him think he can inflict his neediness on me. "Targoth, I’m not in the mood. Whatever you want, it's not happening."
His peculiar grin falters slightly, replaced with a confused tilt of his head. “Didn’t catch you in a good moment tonight, huh? I can see that.”
“Not even close. Seriously, just back off.”
He leans in closer, uninvited, even as the bar's atmosphere continues to buzz around us. “Maybe you just need someone who can really—”
“Not interested!” I snap. "Do you not understand the word ‘no’?”
He straightens his posture, momentarily taken aback. “Okay, okay! Just trying to brighten your evening.”
“Brighten it? Targoth, if you truly wanted to brighten anyone's evening, you would’ve noticed that I’m perfectly fine on my own. I don’t need a clown act.”
“Is that... is that jealousy I’m sensing?” His expression shifts to amusement, a flicker of mischief dancing in his eyes.
“Jealousy? Please, you’re not worth that.” I turn away from him, forcing myself to take a deep, calming breath.
He shrugs. "I suppose you can keep fooling yourself until you admit it to yourself. You deserve someone better."
I hiss at him, but he's leaving and won't see my glare. I do deserve better, it's not hard to find someone better than his ass.
I just hope...
Vatok's a good guy, but maybe he isn't for me after all.
Julie... You can do this on your own. It'll be like before, you're going to be fine.