Chapter Twelve #2
“I don’t know about that, but it is good to be back. I’m sorry to hear about your husband.”
She shakes her head. “You always were a good girl. I loved Mike once. Hell, I loved him my whole life. That doesn’t mean I always liked him. I’m proud that he was my first and my last, and he gave me two beautiful children. But by the end, I barely recognized the man he’d become.”
“You don’t have to say that.”
“I know. But it’s the truth, so why wouldn’t I? He failed you. The whole town did, but Mike more than most because he had the power to change your life. And instead, he took the payout so he could change his own.”
I jerk back at the confirmation that he was getting paid to look the other way, the knowledge hurting my chest even though I always knew it deep down.
There is something inherently worse about a person in power, a person we teach our kids not just to look up to but to trust, and have them throw you to the wolves.
“I don’t know how much you heard, or if you’d even care.
I’m not sure I would if the shoe were on the other foot.
But after you were arrested, I kicked Mike out.
I filed for divorce, which he contested every step of the way.
He really thought I’d get over it. But I couldn’t look at him, not without picturing you in handcuffs when we all know it should have been Martin wearing them. ”
“I don’t know what to say,” I admit. I suspect I now know why her son hates me.
I can’t tell her it’s okay because it’s not.
I’m learning that not everything that happened was black and white.
But knowing that more was going on behind the scenes doesn’t grant people my forgiveness.
I’ve spent too many years cultivating my anger toward this place and the people in it, to get soft now.
“Would you like a glass of lemonade?”
I open my mouth to decline but then remember how good Austin’s mouth felt against mine. Cooling off is definitely the best idea right now. “That would be great, thank you.”
I don’t bother waving to Austin. It won’t hurt him to sit in his feelings for a minute. I don’t know what his endgame is here, but I can’t say I’m all that eager to find out.
I follow Jackie inside as she leads me to her kitchen, which is painted a cheerful yellow. The cupboards and countertops are bright white, and the appliances are cream-colored, giving the kitchen a retro vibe. I like it. It’s warm and inviting.
She points to the table with the yellow seat pads and the vase in the center filled with crocheted sunflowers. “Take a seat, and I’ll grab us both a drink.”
I do as she asks and watch her putter around the kitchen, pulling out glasses, filling them with ice, then with lemonade and lemon slices. She walks over and hands me a glass before taking the seat across from mine.
“So how are you finding things now you’re back?”
“They’ve been…interesting.”
Her lips twitch at my evasive answer. “People aren’t still giving you trouble, surely.”
“People have long memories, and I was never popular.”
She gives a sigh—one filled with sadness.
“We all messed up with you. They say it takes a village to raise a child, but it takes a village to fail one, too. And we failed you in the worst possible way. You weren’t alone.
I know it must have seemed like it over the years, but other people had been scorned and shunned for things they didn’t deserve too.
This town has been my home my whole life , and yet, I can’t say I like it here all that much anymore. ”
“Seems to be the day for revelations today.” I huff out a laugh before taking a sip of my drink, which is cold and sharp, just the way I like it.
“Oh?”
I tell her about the other encounters I’ve had today and watch her as she hears about Bettie.
“Oh, that poor family. I didn’t know about that. Mike told me Christian quit because he and Martin didn’t see eye to eye. And then a little while later, he said Christian came back looking for his old job back, and then caused a ruckus when he found out he had been replaced.”
“Mike lied.”
“Yeah, turns out my husband was good at that. But the thing is, I knew he was lying, not always, but sometimes. And yet I pretended to be oblivious for a quieter, easier life. That makes me just as bad as him.”
I don’t know what to say to that. Most of the town turned a blind eye to what was going on, and I guess it’s easier to follow the crowd than forge a path alone. Christian is proof of that.
“I don’t know if it was my dad or Mike, but one of them, or both of them, blacklisted Christian. They forced a man with a dying daughter to work a state away because they didn’t like being called out for their actions.”
She covers her mouth with her hand. I feel a bit shitty for laying it all out, but it would have come out eventually.
“I know I’m a day late and a dollar short, but what can I do?”
“Well, Christian needs help. I’m going to hire him back at the ranch, but Bettie will need around-the-clock care. I have no idea who would be a good fit.”
“Leave it with me. I’ll come up with some candidates, and I’ll even help Christian interview them. It’s the least I can do. Oh, and I can cook.”
I chuckle. “I know. Mike used to rave about your pie in one breath and complain about needing to go to the gym in the other.”
“Sounds about right. My point is, with the kids grown, I don’t cook much because it seems pointless when it’s just me.
But I miss it. What if I cook some meals and bring them over to Christian so he can freeze them and reheat them when needed?
That has to be easier, especially if he’ll be on the ranch all day. ”
“That would actually be amazing.”
“I’ll get right on that. I’ll contact Christian myself.”
I bite my lip, wondering how receptive he’ll be toward the woman who was once married to the sheriff who fucked him over.
As if reading my expression, she reaches across the table and pats my hand. “I’ll go in person. We’ll talk, and I’ll apologize for my hand in what happened. I should have been more like him and his wife, and then maybe I wouldn’t be so ashamed to look in the mirror.”
“Everything seems easier in hindsight, but it’s different when you’re living it,” I tell her, surprised that I want to give her some grace.