Chapter 5
CHAPTER 5
TORI
“ D on’t you dare feel guilty,” Cleo snaps. “It sounds like he deserved to get fired… or worse, the sleazeball. What did he think he was going to do, force you to accept his little love letter? I wouldn’t be surprised if it had anthrax in it or something. The creep.”
“He took it too far this time,” I agree.
“Are you okay?” Lily touches my arm. “Do you want to stay?”
“We can’t leave now. What if she gets the silver fox hunk’s number? He’s the one who saved you, right?” Cleo points in my savior's direction.
My cheeks burn. “Don’t point .”
She lowers her hand. “Sorry. I was only messing around.”
“It’s fine. I didn’t mean to snap.”
It’s time to chillax, Tori. I was trying to play it casual back there, but when that man strode behind the bar, my body got all tingly. He was well over six feet tall, with a square, strong jaw, and his eyes were a shade of brown that could be Valentine-red in certain lights. His casual blue shirt, the top two buttons undone, showed his firmly muscled chest.
Mostly, the tingles came from the way he looked at me. It was protective, almost like he was telling me with his intense eyes that I never had to worry about anything ever again.
That’s why I ran. My poetic side was trying to take the reins. I can’t be like Mom, swept off my feet just because a man looks at me.
“Time for the numbers,” Cleo says, interrupting my thoughts. “Want me to get yours, Tori?”
Before I can answer, she darts toward the line.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” Lily asks, smiling softly.
“It’ll take more than that douchebag to ruin my night. How about you? Surviving being away from Clive for the evening?”
She laughs, and my plan works. She starts talking enthusiastically about her and Clive’s most recent romantic walk.
Cleo joins us a few minutes later, her voice loud even with the music humming in the background. “I tried to be sneaky to see who got our numbers from our envelopes, but they mixed them all up. Guess there’s not a ‘try before you buy policy.’”
“How did they mix them up?” Lily asks.
“They made me take a number, then shuffled the envelopes around so I couldn’t see who took the other one. They said they matched numbers in pairs.
“So you have to give your number before you get yours?” Lily says.
Cleo nods. “Exactly, so they know which to give you. But why are you so interested, huh?”
Lily rolls her eyes. “Don’t take it there. I’m just curious.”
“Thanks,” I mutter when Cleo hands me my number.
“Hey – serious… uh, Sissy.”
“Sissy?”
“I’m not the bookworm. Cut me some slack.”
The mention of being a bookworm hits too closely at my secret hobby. Do I need to be ashamed about that? My friends would be supportive, but keeping it hidden somehow feels like the best option.
“I’m just saying,” Cleo goes on. “Not everything has to be serious all the time. Just try to have some fun with it. Hey…” Cleo puts her hand on my arm. “I know I seem like the most fun, not to mention funniest, most charismatic person you’ve ever met…”
“I’m sure there’s going to be a point in here somewhere,” I mutter playfully.
Cleo grins. “But I don’t always feel that way. Sometimes, you have to try. Or drink. Either, or.”
She knocks back her drink.
“That was almost moving,” I say sarcastically.
“Keep. It. Casual.” Cleo gestures as though painting the words in the air. “That’s the name of the game. Do me a favor. Call it a Valentine’s gift.”
“Okay, I’ll try. You’re probably right. I’m far too ‘doom and gloom’ sometimes. It can’t be healthy.”
“Sometimes, you act like you’re two hundred and one, not twenty-one,” Cleo says.
“She has her reasons,” Lily defends.
“She’s right, Lily,” I cut in with a sigh. “I’m at a bar on Valentine’s, and I was just…” I stop myself. I was about to say, Saved by a silver fox . “Just thinking I need to make more of an effort.”
“So, time to start texting.”
“Shouldn’t I wait for him to text me first?” I ask. Truthfully, I don’t want to text anybody. Maybe if it was the silver-fox stranger… I didn’t even get my savior’s name.
That thought annoys me. He’s not my savior. I don’t need saving.
But the point is valid. I shouldn’t—I don’t—need anybody else. Do I?
I replay Cleo’s words in my mind. Keep it casual.
“Oh my giddy gawd,” Cleo says, giggling. “Lily, are my eyes deceiving me? Is she really doing it? Is she texting?”
“Hush, you’ll break the spell,” Lily hisses.
I roll my eyes as I type a simple, purposefully casual message.
Tori: I hope you’re not expecting heart emojis, stranger.
“Mine has texted me back already,” Cleo says excitedly.
“What was your opening gambit?” Lily asks. “Wait, let me guess. It was some variation of ‘Meet me around back in five minutes.’”
“Wow, Lily, I’m hurt.”
“I’m sorry. I was kidd?—”
“I told him ten minutes.” Cleo grins.
That gets us all laughing like hyenas. As I wait for a reply, I look around the bar. Some people are still dancing and talking, but many are staring at their phones, smiles on their faces, caught up in the Valentine’s spirit.
The silver fox savior sits with his friend at the end of the bar, looking so dashing I can’t look at him for long. Just the sight of him confuses me. It makes me feel like…
Face facts, Tori. It makes me feel like Mom.
“So, lay it on us,” Lily says, drawing my attention. “What did you really say?”
“I asked him if he thought this was as lame as I do… you know, playing it cool,” Cleo explains.
“But you don’t think it’s lame,” Lily says. “You were the most excited out of any of us.”
“Newsflash, Lily: being honest with your date from the get-go is a recipe for disaster.”
“I happen to disagree with that profoundly,” Lily retorted.
My phone vibrates. It’s my Valentine's stranger.
Valentine Stranger: Don’t worry. I wasn’t expecting a damn thing. If you want the truth, I think this is a waste of time. I don’t want to spoil your evening, but you might be better off texting somebody else.
Wow, talk about grumpy. And here I was, thinking I was the most negative person in this joint.
Tori: I can’t do that since we’ve only got each other’s numbers.
Valentine Stranger: I don’t want to disappoint you.
It’s difficult to keep it casual when he’s being so stubbornly grumpy.
Tori: What’s your favorite color?
Valentine Stranger: Laugh out loud. Did you seriously just ask me that?
Tori: You just typed ‘laugh out loud’ instead of using LOL. Don’t try to take the moral high ground here.
Valentine Stranger: LOL makes me feel like an angsty teenager texting my crush.
Tori: Are you always this serious?
“Lily, is she smiling?” Cleo teases.
“Hush,” Lily says. “Don’t break the spell.”
Heck, they’re right. I’ve got an unabashed grin on my face, and no way to deny it.
It’s not my fault this guy is the grumpiest person in the universe.
Valentine Stranger: I’m not one for games.
Tori: Why? Been played before, huh?
“Hmm, I may have struck a sore point,” I mutter when he doesn’t reply for a few minutes.
“Can I see?” Cleo asks.
I overreact, holding the phone to my chest.
“Message received. Getting spicy already?” Cleo says, holding up her hands in surrender.
I shake my head. “No, but my texts are private, thank you very much.”
“Your silver fox has been on his phone, by the way,” Lily chimes.
I turn, casually glancing in his direction, but he’s leaning broodily against the bar. Several women are sneaking glances at him, probably hoping he’s their secret texter. It shouldn’t bother me, especially since I’ve solemnly vowed to be casual. But maybe it bothers me just a little—the teensy tiniest amount.
“He’s not now,” I say.
“Have you received any texts back?” Cleo asks.
“Nope.”
“I’ll sneakily watch him. When he’s on his phone, if you get a text, we’ll know it’s him,” she says conspiratorially.
“That would be fate,” Lily says confidently. I must make a face because she asks, “What?”
“I know you have your beliefs, but I don’t think fate has anything to do with this.”
“The guy who saved you happens to be your secret Valentine? Come on, Tori…” Lily presses.
“There were like thirty people who joined the text-a-thon. Hardly lottery odds,” I grumble.
“He’s on his phone,” Cleo whisper-shouts.
A moment later, my phone vibrates.
“Fate,” Lily says, making a face at me.
Valentine Stranger: Let’s just say I’ve learned not to play games. That way, winning OR losing is out of the question.
Tori: Sometimes, stranger, you don’t have to take things so seriously. You can just go with the flow and be casual .
Valentine Stranger: Maybe I’m not interested in casual.
Tori: But you’re not interested in anything serious, either?
“There’s that smile again,” Cleo comments and then looks down at her phone. “My guy is very interested. I wonder if he’s hot. Silver fox is still on his phone, FYI.”
Valentine Stranger: Life is easier if you focus on what you can control. You can’t control love.
Tori: But you can control whether or not you have a good time.
“How’s it going?” Cleo asks.
“Okay… I think. I’m channeling my inner Cleo, pretending to be casual. Thankfully, it’s just texting. I don’t think I could keep up this game if we met in person.”
“Even if it was Mr Silver Fox? Any response? Because he put his phone down.”
“Nothing.”
Lily sings, “Faaate…”
I don’t answer Cleo’s first question. Thinking about the idea that my secret texter could be the silver fox has my belly doing flips. But I’m not going to let them see that.
“He’s picked up his phone.”
And, of course, I get a text.
Valentine Stranger: Give me your definition of fun when it comes to romance.
I imagine the silver fox saying this in his deep, commanding, rich voice, the same one he used when defending me against Damien. I don’t have an answer to his question – or is it more of a demand?
“Something wrong?” Lily asks.
“He just asked me to define my definition of fun when it comes to romance. Or challenged me to, I guess. What should I say?”
“Be honest,” Lily advises. “Speak from the heart.”
“Screw that,” Cleo says. “Say you want to keep this the most casual relationship ever. Tell him if he even hints at anything serious, you’ll leave a Tori-shaped hole in the wall.”
Her comment is lighthearted, but the reference to my ‘shape’ leaves me feeling annoyingly self-conscious for a moment. I beat the body-image demons away.
Tori: Taking it one step at a time. Not worrying about tomorrow or the implications. Living in the moment. Being happy. I guess that’s my definition.
Valentine Stranger: I can’t afford to live in the moment. I’ve got a career that demands a lot of my time. I’ve got family responsibilities. It’s not just myself I have to worry about .
I want to ask more about him, but I’m getting too invested. It’s like he’s trying to force me to take an interest. And I am, which is bad. I’m not going to fall head over heels over the freaking phone.
“He’s mentioned his personal life,” I murmur.
“Ask him about it,” Lily counsels.
“Tell him to put a sock in it and hurry up with the dick pic.”
“Cleo!” Lily says, but she’s laughing.
“That’s less ‘casual’ and more ‘end up on a list,’ Cleo,” I say.
My phone vibrates again.
“Silver fox update,” Cleo says. “He just typed loads then put his phone down… right when your phone screen lit up.”
Butterflies swirl in my belly as I pick up my cell to read his next text. What if it is him ? I almost don’t want it to be. If it’s somebody else, I might have more chance of keeping things casual.
When he looked at me, I don’t know, I felt like… Ah, there it is—that nasty, defeatist, not-very-Cupid-like thought. I feel like Mom: a sucker waiting to be taken advantage of.