That One Moment

8. Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight

Jamie

“ H ey, sleepyhead, wake up.” I press gentle kisses to Cooper's forehead, then his cheeks, and slowly work my way down to his lips. He grumbles and his eyelids flutter as I continue kissing a trail down his body, breathing in his sleep scented skin. “Time to get up.” He pushes my head away and I bite him hard on the stomach, making him hiss.

“Too early, stop it you heathen,” he chuckles while tugging on the hair gripped in his hands. I lick across his stomach, kissing the beauty mark that sits just above his navel before continuing my descent.

“It’s your birthday, beautiful boy. Time to get up and celebrate.” I slide lower, pulling his boxers down and freeing his morning wood. His cock is long and slender, cut with a flushed mushroom head. His skin is warm and velvety and I swipe my tongue over the tip then down the shaft and along his taint before sucking his balls into my mouth.

Cooper moans, his hands dropping from my head to grip the rumpled sheets. His eyes are still closed, though his head is now thrown back and I keep my eyes on him as his body squirms under the assault of pleasure. “Birthday boys should get to sleep in.” He moans again as I add a hand, moving upwards in a twisting motion. “Hmmmm, actually, birthday boys should definitely get to come.”

Taking his cock into my mouth, I hum in agreement and he thrusts his hips up, hitting the back of my throat.

“Yes, fuck yes. Best. Birthday. Ever,” he breathes out while moving his hips, fucking into my mouth.

I take his cock deeper, holding him in my throat until my head starts to spin, my vision getting hazy at the edges, but still I don’t stop watching him. Sliding one hand between his ass cheeks, I rub one finger over the puckered flesh of his rim, eliciting a sinful groan from his lips. I don’t press it in further, just tap against his entrance while I pull back to catch my breath. His eyes shoot open and his beautiful blues catch on mine. His breathing picks up, pants and whimpers filling the otherwise quiet room. My own dick aches, begging for release as I rut it against the mattress.

“Make love to me,” Cooper says, his voice a raspy whisper. My body screams ‘yes’ and I let go of his throbbing cock and climb back over him, bringing my swollen lips to his. I don’t care about morning breath as I seal our lips together and kiss him. Our cocks meet, mine still trapped in my boxers, and he hurriedly pushes at the waistband, tugging them down as best he can while our lips remain locked together.

“Please, I want you inside me, please Jamie.” We’ve been building up to this over the past few weeks, indulging in hand jobs and blow jobs and a shit load of dry humping. Thanks to part time jobs and heavy loads of school work though, a lot of our time together is rushed - hot but rushed.

The first time we make love, it needs to be perfect. Slow and sensual with nothing else on our minds. Today, now, feels perfect, and I want nothing more than to sink myself inside him, to lose myself in the man I love.

I love him.

Pulling back, I frame his face with my hands and look down into his sapphire blue eyes. They swirl with emotion and darken a fraction when I lick my lips.

“I love you, baby. So damn much. I've known it since the day you walked into my life. It was love at first sight. You’re it for me, Cooper. My entire world.”

The romantic in me preens at how well I managed to deliver those words without my voice cracking, the emotion inside me bubbling to the point of explosion. A tear escapes Cooper’s left eye and I lick it up, loving the salty taste of him on my tongue.

“I love you too.” He presses up, gently bringing our lips together. “I never thought that by the time I turned twenty, I’d have found the love of my life, and I certainly never thought it would be with my stepbrother. But none of that matters. I’m going to love you forever.”

Fluttering warmth fills my chest as we kiss, all the emotion and our dreams of the future together surging between us.

“Please make love to me now,” he pleads while I kiss his neck, his collarbone, his chest, his stomach and every bit of available flesh. I will kiss this man for the rest of our lives.

He rolls to the side, fumbling in my bedside drawer, pulling out a tube of lube and a condom, which he tosses next to me on the bed. I know for a fact I didn’t put those there, and he smirks at me when I eye them and then focus my gaze back on him.

“You came prepared,” I say, and he rolls onto his stomach, leaving me with a beautiful view of his pale, muscular ass.

“Knew what I wanted for my birthday,” Cooper replies, then dips his head between the two pillows and lifts his lower body onto his knees. Fuck, my lover is eager and it’s making me far too excited, too quickly.

“God, baby, you have no idea what you’re doing to me.” I scoot behind him, take the globes of his ass in both hands and spread them apart, sucking in a breath when I’m met with his puckered hole.

I’ve had sex before but it’s always been fast and impersonal. This is different and I plan to take my time, to draw it out for the both of us. My dick leaks, throbbing in time with my heartbeat, and though those are my intentions, I am already so close to coming.

Cooper looks over his shoulder and smiles wickedly. “I want to know what it feels like to have your tongue inside me.”

A long, primal groan ripples out of me. “Holy fuck, Cooper, you can’t say things like that when I’m this worked up.” My body quakes with barely contained desire as a rush of adrenaline and excitement courses through me like a jet plane. I lightly slap his ass then pull his cheeks apart again and dive down, doing just as he asked. I lick and suck and nibble around his sensitive hole, all the while Cooper's moans and whimpers get louder. If anyone was to walk past my bedroom, there’s no doubt they’d hear him. Thankfully, my housemates are all pretty late risers.

Sliding my tongue inside Cooper’s tight channel, my eyes roll back as his taste hits me. Musky and sweet, with an edge of bitterness. Intoxicating. His ass is wet and dripping with my saliva when he starts begging for more. I will give him everything he ever asks for, but I don’t want to do it like this. When I slide myself into him for the first time, I want to do it with our eyes on each other. I want to know what he looks like when he feels that first bite of pain, how his lips move when I hit the sensitive spot inside him. I want to know every minute detail of how he looks when we’re connected completely.

“Roll over, baby,” I say, sitting back on my knees and tapping his thigh. Cooper rolls over. He has a sly smile on his face as he dances his fingers down his chest and then takes his flushed cock in hand. Squeezing and twisting, a small drop of liquid cascades down the side of his erect shaft. He spreads his legs and lifts his knees while putting on a show for me. His breath hitches and he moves his hips, fucking his own fist, and I can see in the tension on his face that he’s close, too close. I bat his hand away from his cock then crawl over him, blanketing his body with mine as our lips meet again. His hands roam my naked back, fingertips tracing my spine before coming to rest at the nape of my neck.

“You don’t get to make yourself come, that’s my job,” I mutter into his ear, biting at the soft flesh of his earlobe.

“Then do it, make me come.” I chuckle at the command in his voice, at the way my usually laid back, go with the flow, lover is suddenly so needy and vocal about it. Cooper is the giver, he never asks for anything - at least not outside the bedroom. Here though, he’s calling all the shots.

“With fucking pleasure, beautiful boy.” I pull back, but keep my eyes on him. Cooper watches me coat my fingers with lube, then bites his bottom lip as I wordlessly press one slick finger inside him, twirling it around before adding a second.

He hisses as I scissor my fingers then bend them in a ‘come here’ gesture. As I hit that soft bundle of nerves inside him, he cries out, his hips jerking up on the bed.

“Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit,” he pants, and I can’t hold back the chuckle at the wide eyed glare on his face. He looks shocked, completely mesmerised.

“You’ve had your prostate stroked before, right?” The look of absolute amazement leads me to believe he hasn’t. He told me he’s bottomed before but that doesn’t mean he knows what this feels like. I stroke over the spot again and Cooper whines, throwing his head back as his hips launch up again and a stream of precum leaks from the head of his dick.

“No,” he pants, “never felt that before. Do it again,” he begs. I wiggle my fingers, then apply pressure, and Cooper grips the bedsheets hard enough to turn his knuckles white. “If you don’t stop doing that, I’m going to come.”

Indecision stills me for a moment. I want to feel him come on my cock but the look of bliss lining his features as I stroke him again, is too much to ignore. Decision made, I lightly press on his prostate again, then press harder, alternating my rhythm until his tight channel is gripping my fingers.

“Come for me,” I grit out, my own orgasm right there threatening to overtake me. It’s been years since I came prematurely but the feel of Cooper gripping me, the mewl-like sounds he’s making and the look of his pale body writhing and pulling taut with pleasure because of me , has me so worked up, I wouldn’t be surprised if I exploded just watching him.

I wrap my hand around his cock, my fingers milking his prostate, and that’s all it takes. Cooper’s eyes slam shut as his cock erupts, streams of thick white liquid hitting his chest and covering my hand.

As fast as I can, I pull on the condom and coat my dick in lube then line myself up at his entrance. I need to be inside him. I need it more than the air in my lungs.

“This okay?” I ask because I know he may be too sensitive. A blissed-out smile tips his lips as he nods. Pressing in slowly, I watch the muscles move in his face as I sink all the way in. I study every subtle movement - the twitch of his lips, the flare of his nostrils - memorising every last detail of this moment.

As I move inside him, Cooper’s mouth parts on a silent exhale, his pupils dilate and he throws his head back, exposing the long, pale expanse of his slender neck. His cock twitches and when I lean over him, licking a stripe up his neck and then to his earlobe, I feel it harden between us.

“More, baby?”

He hums in response, lifting his hands to lie above his head. Offering me his body to do with as I please. My lips meet his in a hungry kiss. It’s sloppy and wet, tongue and teeth clashing as my movements speed up.

“I’ve never felt anything like this,” I say, my voice coming out strained and hoarse. I’m so close, but I don’t want this to end. “You were made for me, just for me.”

“Yes,” he whispers. “You feel incredible, so perfect.”

Sliding my hands beneath his shoulders, I flip us, until Cooper is on top of me, his full weight pressing me into the bed as he sits up, looking down with hooded eyelids. His hands find my pecs and he digs his nails in, a bolt of pain heating my blood until all I can hear is the beating of my heart in my ears.

“Fuck, you’re breathtaking,” I say, completely and utterly blown away by his beauty. By the lines of his body, the way the muscles in his arms and legs bunch as he swirls his hips, the ripple of his toned stomach as he clenches around me and the faintest goosebumps that rise on his skin. But it’s his eyes that get me. The bluest blue I’ve ever seen, a thousand different shades all swirling together, shining with passion and love.

So much love.

“I love you,” Cooper says, leaning down and pressing his forehead to mine. He’s breathless so I take over, fucking up into him. Cooper fists his cock, working it in a steady rhythm.

“Love you, baby. Always.”

We move together, a tide, ebbing and flowing, the natural rhythm of our heartbeats guiding us, pulling us closer, fusing us together. This is what love feels like. Not the sex, but the connection. The feeling that this person is a part of me as much as I am a part of him.

“Love you, love you,” I say over and over again. Cooper’s body tenses, his hole clamps down and I feel his hot cum hit my stomach. Rolling us back over, I take his hips in my hands, and thrust in harder, once, twice, then a third time before pleasure ricochets from the tips of my toes and up through my balls. I come deep inside him, with a huge fucking smile on my face.

My body quivers, my legs and arms tingling from the exertion and pleasure, and I collapse on top of him. He coughs out a ‘hmph’ as I squash him into the bed and he kisses my now sweaty head. Rolling over, I maneuver myself up the bed and throw my leg over his waist. My bed isn’t big but even if it was king sized, I’d still want to be right here, right on top of him.

“So glad I stayed over last night,” Cooper says, a grin playing on his lips. His eyes are closed and he looks thoroughly fucked. Bright pink cheeks, a flush down his entire body and red marks where I gripped him a little too hard.

“Happy birthday, my love,” I say, pulling him closer and moving him so his head is against my chest, right over my heart.

With my hand toying with his black locks, I close my eyes, humming a tune under my breath and loving each second of his warm body next to mine.

“What is that song?” he asks, his hand fiddling, drawing lines along my naked skin, my stomach fluttering every time he passes below my navel.

“It's called Always by Bon Jovi.”

“Hmmm,” he sighs, “It's really pretty.” His voice is sleepy as I pull him up higher so I can kiss his cheek.

“I'll sing it for you sometime.”

He smiles, closes his eyes and then snuggles into me, eliminating any space between us as he swings his leg over my hip. I hum a little longer, the lyrics playing in my head until I drift off too.

It’s after ten when we finally wake again, both of us in desperate need of a shower. I’m still cuddled into Cooper but he pulls out from under me and rolls onto his side. I do the same so that we’re face to face. Then we’re kissing. Slow, languid, kisses. Kisses that speak of how we feel in a way words never could. Kisses that say, ‘you are my everything’ and ‘I would do anything for you.’ They’re lazy Sunday kisses that warm every corner of my heart, body and soul.

“I have to get up,” Cooper breathes the words against my lips.

“I know,” I say back, reluctantly pulling away from his tempting lips. He’s a twin, which means today is not just his birthday and I know he has plans with Caiden. They're playing paintball and having lunch together. Cooper explained that each year they take turns picking their birthday activity and this year was his brother's choice.

Cooper stretches then rolls off the bed and throws on yesterday's clothes before gathering up fresh ones and a towel. My room is two doors down from the shared bathroom, and as much as I would love to jump in with him, I let him go alone and instead flop down on my bed and grab my phone.

Scrolling through social media, I come across some photos uploaded by a girl I know from one of my architecture classes. It appears to be at a party, there’s people everywhere, red cups and beer bottles littering the table in front of her and a huge beer keg set off to the side. She’s sitting on a blue sofa with a girl on her lap and they’re both smiling widely at the camera. I scroll to the next photo and it’s much the same, as is the third and fourth, only now there are more people on the sofa. It’s the fifth photo that catches my attention. It’s a selfie with the same girl and her friends, but there, on the edge of the group, is Caiden. His eyes are bloodshot and glossy and from the high angle she’s taken the shot, I can see that his shirt is torn. He’s the only one not smiling, instead his eyes are fixed on a guy to the right of the girl. He’s a jock type, dressed in a polo shirt and an expensive watch which is visible because he has his arm around the girl's shoulder while he's kissing her cheek.

An unfamiliar feeling rumbles in my gut the longer I stare at the photo. The more I study it, the more I notice that something isn’t right with Caiden. Not only is his shirt torn, but when I zoom in, I can make out a red mark on the side of his neck. Like someone held him too tight or maybe hit him. I throw my phone down with a sigh. Caiden is a mystery to me but as much as he rubs me the wrong way at times, I hate that lost look he gets in his eyes, like he’s hopeless, like he doesn’t matter.

Cooper comes back soon after, freshly showered and shaved, smelling like mint and coconut. He straddles my waist on the bed, and takes my cheeks between his hands.

“You give the best birthday presents,” he says with a chuckle. “I’d like to put in a request for the same for Christmas, Easter, Valentine’s Day and Halloween and any and every day in between.”

“Anything you want, baby.” Cooper climbs off my lap and I want to pull him back but today isn’t about me and what I want. “I got you another gift. Oh, and I bought Caiden something, I’ll give it to him later.”

“You did?” Cooper furrows his brow as he pulls on his socks and shoes.

Opening my bag which is lying next to the bed, I pull out two small boxes. “This one’s for you,” I say, handing the larger of the two boxes to Cooper.

He opens the box slowly, and lifts the necklace up, then runs it between his fingers. It’s a polished silver chain with a washer on it. Engraved with the words, ‘Always and Forever’ and then ‘Cooper and Jamie’.

“It’s gorgeous,” he says, looking up at me with impossibly bright eyes. He presses the pendant to his lips then holds it out to me. “Put it on me?” I kneel on the bed behind him and place the chain around his neck, kissing the back of it once the necklace is fastened. His skin pebbles with tiny goosebumps and I run my hands down his arms, hugging him and soaking in every bit of his warmth that I can. I will never tire of holding this man, he will never not be everything I need. “Thank you, I love it.” Cooper touches the pendant that rests neatly on his clavicle. I sit back then hand him the second box.

It’s smaller than his was, and not as fancy, but I really hope Caiden will like it. Cooper pulls out the bracelet and holds it up to the light. It’s made of blue and black stainless steel links that look like a series of clasps snapped together. It’s chunky and shiny and when I saw it online, something about the colours reminded me of Caiden.

“I think he’ll love it. Thank you for trying with him,” he says softly. “It means a lot to me.”

I’m just out of the shower, Cooper having left an hour ago to meet up with his brother, when my phone pings with an incoming message. Opening it, I smile when I see the message is from Sage, though my lips drop as soon as I read her message.

Sage: Have you spoken to Caiden today? Something’s up with him.

The photos from last night come to mind and I hit call on her number.

“Hey,” she says. “Are you still with Cooper?”

My eyes look around my room, seeing signs of him in my space - a pair of socks on the floor, his boxers on the bed, half a glass of water next to the bed.

“No, he left a while ago. Why did you say that about Caiden?”

Glasses clink in the background and a cupboard closes, and I can just make out the bubbling of a kettle.

“I went to that Alison girl’s birthday party, you know the one I invited you to?” Sage asks. I nod though she can’t see me. “Caiden was there. Drunk off his face, slurring and stumbling about the place.”

“Was he with someone?”

“I got there really late because I had to work so if he had been with someone earlier I don’t know. But he was very much alone when I found him. He looked wrecked. His eyes couldn’t focus and his top was shredded, like someone had forcibly grabbed it.”

Sage is quiet for a moment before she continues. “He also had some bruising on his neck. I asked him about it but he just mumbled it was none of my business and tried to walk away.” I think back to the photo I saw of Caiden, the description matching up with what Sage is telling me.

“Why didn’t you call me? I would have come and got him.” I’m pacing my room now, for no other reason than that the thought of what’s going on with Caiden is making me antsy.

“And ruin your date with Cooper? No, I had it under control. I wasn’t alone so I had my um….my friend help me get him back to mine. It wasn’t easy, he argued, but when I reminded him he had a big day today with Cooper, he softened. But Jamie?”

There’s hesitation in her voice when she says my name.

“Yeah?”

“I don’t think he’s okay. I left him staring at the ceiling but when I popped back into my room five minutes later to grab a warmer coat, he was crying. Covered in my duvet but full on sobbing. I know the guy’s a dick but it broke my heart to hear.”

“Thanks for doing that, Sage, and thanks for letting me know. I’ll try and talk to him later. You still coming for dinner?”

“For sure. And anytime. He’s important to Cooper, so that means he’s important to me too.” A man’s voice in the background catches my attention but Sage shushes him before speaking to me again. “Anyway, got to run.”

“Don’t think I won’t be prying you for information about this ‘friend’, Miss Sage.”

“Static…..bssshhh…can’t hear you.” Sage makes a terrible attempt at mimicking the line breaking up before she hangs up on me.

Turning on some music, I sit on my bed and listen, singing along as I close my eyes, ignoring the stone that sits heavy in my stomach when I think about Caiden.

“That you, Jamie?” My mum shouts as I walk through the door of their home. A song I don't recognise is playing, older than the eighties and nineties music that fills my playlist, but it's upbeat and the lyrics are fun.

With the birthday cake in one hand, I kick off my shoes and awkwardly shuffle out of my coat. Mum comes into view, taking the box from me then kissing me on the cheek. “It’s so lovely to see you, thanks for picking this up.”

Mum turns and walks back into the kitchen and I follow. “No problem.” My feet stop abruptly when I enter the room, my eyes widening comically. “Holy shit, Mum!” Every surface in the kitchen is covered with trays of food, and three pots are bubbling on the stove. The scent of chili overpowers everything, but I can see salads, baklava, macaroni cheese, tarka dal and an array of spiced vegetables. “How many people are coming tonight?”

She bats my hand away as I go to take a piece of syrupy dessert. “Just you, the twins, me and Duncan and Sage. I invited Leo but he had plans, and Cooper didn’t want to invite any of his friends.” My guess is that Cooper didn’t want to make his brother feel uncomfortable by having a group of his friends over.

My eyes dart around the room again before coming to land on mum’s smiling face. Her eyes are bright today, and she’s wearing a pink dungaree set covered by the cow print apron that I gave her for her birthday when I was twelve. I had saved up for that apron for months and it’s now worn and tatty but she refuses to replace it. “I made all the twins’ favourites. There’s a passionfruit cheesecake in the fridge for Caiden and homemade mint ice cream in the freezer for Cooper.” Have I mentioned that my mum is the best person I know?

“You could feed an entire football team, but I think they’ll love it.” Adjusting the backwards ball cap on my head, I wait for mum's back to be turned before sneaking a little of the baklava. The syrupy goodness bursts on my tongue and I stifle a moan then lick the evidence from my fingers quickly before she turns around.

Duncan comes in then, he's wearing jeans and a plaid shirt, and when he grins at me I see so much of Cooper in him. They have the same warm eyes, and they both smile with such ease.

“Your mum wouldn’t listen to me when I told her one dish was enough. But who am I to tell the woman I love that she can’t cook up a storm when she looks so happy doing it?” Duncan rounds the kitchen counter and kisses my mum on the head as she stirs the chili. I know she will have made it meat-free. Since finding out that Caiden is vegetarian, she no longer cooks meat when we’re all eating together. She wants so badly for him to feel a part of our new blended family.

“Jamie, love, can you blow up the balloons and hang them above the dining table? Maybe throw some of the streamers around too.” This is the twins’ first birthday with us and they’re about to find out just how much birthdays mean to mum.

My phone buzzes as I’m blowing up the ninth black polka dot balloon, my head feeling a little fuzzy from the effort.

Cooper: Did you know that paintballing actually fucking HURTS?

Me: I did.

Cooper: Failed to mention that to me. Thought you loved me?

Me: And ruin your birthday? Never.

He sends back an angry face emoji and I chuckle under my breath.

Cooper: We’ll be there in thirty minutes. Just heading back to my place to change.

Cooper doesn’t mention Caiden, and I don’t ask. Not yet. I’m torn about telling him what Sage told me but at the same time, I don’t want to start keeping things from the man I love. That doesn’t bode well for the start of our relationship. Is it your place though? I ask myself over and over again as I blow up more balloons. Eventually, once all forty are blown up - twenty for each twin - my lips taste like plastic and I need to sit down for a moment to clear the dizziness in my head.

“The guests of honor are here!” my favourite voice says as the front door swings open and a fresh faced Cooper walks in. His hair is wet, looking darker than usual and falling around his eyes. He’s wearing a white crop top and navy blue jeans with white Vans. Leaping from the sofa, I pull him into my arms and kiss him deeply, the hours since I last saw him far too long for my liking.

“Missed you, baby,” I whisper against his lips, before looking over his shoulder. All my earlier thoughts about whether or not I should tell him about Sage’s phone call go out the window when I see Caiden. Whatever happened to him the night before is written all over his body.

His eyes are dim, dark circles sit heavily beneath them and the red mark on his neck peeks out from behind his black polo. He’s much thinner than Cooper and his usually black painted nails are chipped as he picks at them. He looks at me expectantly, his head tipped to the side and a deep line between his brows. It’s clear from the set of his lips that he’s daring me to say something. He’s not stupid, he knows that Sage will have told me.

Stepping away from Cooper, I reach out a hand to Caiden. “Happy Birthday.” His eyes widen briefly before he schools his features and places his hand in mine. I want to say that I don’t feel something when his skin brushes mine, but the little buzz of electricity in my blood can’t be ignored. I tell myself it’s because I’m glad he didn’t push me away, that maybe he's finally warming up to me.

“Thank you,” his voice is soft and tentative. The space he takes up in the room is so much smaller, so much darker than that of his brother, who is currently bouncing on the soles of his feet.

“Boys! You’re here,” my mum says as she sweeps Cooper into a hug. “Happy Birthday! Did you two have fun today?” She drops her arm from around Cooper then takes a step towards Caiden. His shoulders tense, but she hugs him anyway and I watch as he visibly softens as she whispers in his ear and he nods.

“What happened to your neck?” Concern laces my mum’s voice as she levels Caiden with that stern mum look of hers. The one that always has me spilling my secrets. Duncan joins us and suddenly, all eyes are on Caiden. He shifts his feet, and chews on his bottom lip. Like an animal cornered, he hunches his shoulders, folding in on himself as he looks around for an escape.

“Paintball,” Cooper offers up. “He got hit, bloody hurts too.” Cooper lifts his top showing us a bruise blossoming near his underarm. “See, those bullets leave a mark when they hit.” It’s a bad lie, and I’m certain no one believes him, but there’s no chance to say anything more because the front door flies open again and my best friend walks in, her fruity, jasmine scent filling the air as she gives everyone in the room a hug.

Caiden flinches when she hugs him, and when they share a look that is a plea from him and an understanding from her, he dips his head and leaves the room. Cooper watches him go.

“Everything okay?” I ask Cooper, twining our hands together then tucking his head against my shoulder so I can kiss the side of his head.

“I don’t think so. He won’t tell me how he got the bruises, just that he got drunk and Sage let him crash at hers. I’m going to ask him again later because, I’m not sure if you believed me or not, but that wasn’t from paintball.”

I kiss his sweet pink lips. “Baby, I don’t think anyone believed you.” He smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes, so I pull him closer and hug him tighter.

Once the greetings are over, we find Caiden in the kitchen and Mum ushers us into the garden and tells us to ‘play’ like we’re five and this is a birthday party, while her and Duncan finish setting up the dining table. It’s fucking cold out, but we all have coats on, and I grab a selection of beanies from the basket at the back door, handing them around before we filter outside.

Cooper immediately finds a ball and throws it at his brother, hitting Caiden in the leg.

“Ow, you little shit! What was that for?”

Cooper laughs loudly before grabbing a second ball from the garden storage container and lobs it at Sage, catching her on the hip. “Dodgeball,” he shouts, then shrieks and turns and runs down the garden as Caiden chases him, ball in hand.

“I don’t think this is how you play dodgeball,” Sage says as she stands next to me. “There’s rules and safety measures, and teams. This is -” she continues rambling on so doesn’t notice when I step back, pick up the other discarded ball and throw it, hitting her right in the ass.

“You did not just hit me with a ball, Jamie Durand!” Her words are firm but her eyes shine with excitement and mischief as she bends down and then takes aim at me. I turn on my heel and sprint towards where the twins are now wrestling on the cold floor. The ball narrowly misses my right leg and I spin around to mock her poor aim when another ball comes flying out of her hand and hits me square in the jaw.

“Oh shit, I am so sorry,” Sage cries, rushing over to me as I hold my hand against my smarting cheek. “Sorry, sorry, sorry,” she says again, moving my hand to inspect the damage. “I told you this game needed rules.”

“You are the worst best friend ever,” I say playfully, grabbing her in a headlock and pulling her down with me. The four of us, acting like the children my mother thinks we are, roll around on the ground until we’re out of breath.

It’s dark now and the night sky is clear. A deep navy filled with a million shattered diamonds.

Cooper reaches for my hand and I take it, lacing our fingers together then shuffling closer to him. Caiden is on his other side, and Sage is on mine. The four of us lie in silence for a while, watching the stars, cheering when we see a shooting star go by.

“I hope that’s where we go when we die,” Cooper says, his voice full of wonder. “It would mean that we get to look down on everyone we leave behind and they would always look up at us too. Because who doesn’t stop to look at the stars?”

It’s a somber yet beautiful thought.

“Well this is picture-worthy,” Mum says when she finds the four of us, lying together, looking at the night sky. “Duncan!” she yells out, “grab the camera and get a picture of them from upstairs. It’ll be the perfect shot.”

We’re shivering by the time we leave the garden and head into the dining room for what looks to be a medieval banquet minus the stuffed pig.

“That’s a lot of food, Mummy Maria,” Sage says as she sits. We all follow suit and wait for Mum to say her little birthday speech and then, we dig in, eating until our bellies ache. No one asks Caiden about his meal with his mother, but my guess is she didn’t show, again, and no one mentions the bruising on his neck. He catches me looking at it once but I duck my eyes and return to my meal.

Once the food is packed away, and Mum has placed three containers of leftovers onto the counter - one for each of us who don’t live here - we sit together in the lounge to hand out gifts. We laugh at the joke gifts Sage bought the twins, a smile even touching Caiden’s lips when he opens a cereal box that she’s filled with squishy, smiling penises. Duncan gives the boys both gift cards which they gladly receive and my mum gifts them both rugby jerseys from their favourite team, signed by the team captain.

“I already gave Cooper his gift,” I say, reaching into my bag to pull out Caiden’s. Sage whispers something that sounds like ‘I’m sure you did,’ under her breath and Duncan snickers. My cheeks heat, but I ignore the rising blush and hand the small black box to Caiden.

He holds it in the palm of his hand, looks from the box to me, then back at the box. Slowly, as though disarming a bomb, he peels off the ribbon and slides the lid off. If he was going for suspense, that’s exactly what he got. Holding my breath, I wait for him to react. He pulls out the bracelet, lays it in the palm of his hand and just….looks at it. Next to me, Sage coughs, but he doesn’t take his eyes off the piece of jewelry.

Caiden’s brow furrows then he looks at me. “This is…” he clears his throat and starts again. “This is…thank you.” His blue eyes meet mine and I can’t decipher the look that crosses them before his attention is back on the bracelet.

“It’s perfect, right?” Cooper says, depositing himself on my lap. “Jamie gives the best presents.”

“Yeah,” Caiden says, his voice barely a whisper. “It’s perfect.”