Chapter 3 #3
Their every interaction with Ryder had been about teaching him something. Not to touch their drinks, not to whine, not to laugh so loud, not to interrupt... The battle to protect her son’s feelings had gotten so maddening, Joey had chosen to skip the visits so Ted could go alone.
Looking back, she knew that had been her first step toward ending their marriage.
And Ted had blamed Ryder for that, too.
“Ah, Joey.” This time Hendrix cupped her face and touched his forehead to hers. “I see so much in your eyes. I need you to know, however your husband felt, whatever he did, I’m not him.”
Being this close to Hendrix, feeling his understanding, sent the disturbing memories away. “Believe me, I’m aware. It’s just that no one else has prioritized Ryder.”
“No one but you.” Gathering her close so that she rested against his chest, he moved his hands up and down her back. “It’s been tough, I know.”
God, it felt good to be held, to do some of that leaning he’d invited.
“Loving Ryder is easy, but the rest of it...” Surreptitiously hoping he wouldn’t notice, she filled her lungs with his stirring scent.
“My sister is great, but she’s so far away.
He’s had wonderful teachers, too, and when I tutor, the other parents are nice to him and sometimes the student has a sibling he can play with. ”
“But it’s not the same as family.”
“No, it’s not.” As she straightened away, she brushed back her curls and tried not to look so affected by his touch. “So now what? Just like that, you don’t mind the company?”
“I don’t mind your company. If it wasn’t you and Ryder, yeah, I’d still want the park to myself.”
She could address the relationship stuff later.
Holy cow, she had agreed to a relationship!
For now, she wanted to know more about Hendrix.
From the first day she’d met him, he’d fascinated her in that way of dark, mysterious, quiet men.
“I think being here all by yourself sounds horribly lonely.” Especially at Christmas.
“It wasn’t. It was...” His brows gathered closer again in thought.
“Well, I’d say peaceful, but that’s a lie.
Maybe self-indulgent.” His lips firmed. “I decided I was against Christmas, so sealing myself off was a way to deal with it. The thing is, I also sealed myself away from my parents and my sister, brother-in-law and nephew, too.”
Sensing his pain, she put her hand to his jaw. He had rough beard stubble, and beneath that, his skin was so warm. Touching him was nice; it made her feel better grounded, connected instead of alone. “Hendrix, I’m sorry. I won’t pry, but you must have been hurting to do that.”
“More pissed than hurt.” He zeroed in on her mouth. “I’ll tell you about it someday soon, but for now, let’s concentrate on you.” As if they had a longstanding intimate relationship, he kissed her.
An undemanding kiss, like a brief exploration, tentative and curious.
A kiss that lingered three seconds, then four. As he lifted his head, he whispered, “God, I needed that.”
Apparently, she’d needed it more, because only a scant amount of space separated them before she closed in, and the kiss she initiated was a lot hotter. Stepping between his legs, she settled her body flush against his. Heaven. She couldn’t get close enough, fast enough.
With her arms around his neck, she tipped her head for a better fit, and encouraged him with a small sound of hunger.
Totally on board, he cinched one arm around her waist, gathering her closer still, while he tunneled the fingers of his free hand into her hair.
When she parted her lips and touched her tongue to his, he took over, turning so she was practically across his lap, boldly devouring her mouth like a starving man.
The kiss grew hotter, deeper, until Joey thought she might go up in flames.
Before things got completely out of control, Hendrix eased up. He was still right there, enveloping her in his heat, scent and touch, but now only their breaths mingled, not their lips.
She had a more difficult time. Her fingers were knotted in his shirt, her heartbeat rapping hard against her breast.
Lightly stroking her, he gentled his fierce hold. “Damn.”
“Yeah.” It had been so long for her, she couldn’t think of anything better to say. She should have been out of practice, but that had just happened, leaving her feeling like the most naturally sensual woman in the world. She could still taste him, and her every nerve ending sizzled with need.
It took him a minute, and then he said, “The very last thing I want to do is leave you.”
It was the last thing she wanted, too. How nice would it be to stretch out on the futon with Hendrix and his powerful body? That is, if he’d even fit. She glanced at the flat, lumpy mattress, currently folded upright to serve as a couch.
Hendrix snorted. “That thing doesn’t look at all inviting, but you?” He kissed her forehead, her cheek, the side of her neck where he lingered, nuzzling and setting off a new round of exciting shivers. “For you, I’d somehow make it work.”
She smiled at his attitude. “Except that Ryder is sleeping in his room, not that far away.”
“Exactly.” His expression sobered. “I’m guessing he’s not used to...disruptive sounds at night?”
Very true. “Nothing more than me closing a book and turning out a light.”
“And your snores.”
She swatted his shoulder, then had to pause and just feel him.
Flattening her hand, she slid it over the hard curve of his shoulder and down to his biceps, then over to his chest to explore.
Heat radiated through his flannel shirt, and she had to draw in a shaky breath.
“I didn’t even know I wanted this until you. ”
“This?”
“Attention from a man,” she said absently, again smoothing her hands over his broad chest. “This closeness, the intimacy.” Looking into his eyes, she whispered, “Sex.”
That small word caused his eyes to heat. His nostrils slightly flared with a deep inhale. He looked hard, provoked, but to Joey it was sexy as hell.
She expected another kiss, and he didn’t disappoint.
He treated her differently than anyone else. Not brusque and disappointed like Ted, or critical like her in-laws. Not with the affection and sibling love she got from her sister.
Hendrix brought out an onslaught of emotions and sensations that threatened to take out her knees.
He seemed to know it, too, given how he braced her against him, wrapping her up in comfort and stimulation.
His mouth crushed hers, his tongue stealing all thought as her body came sharply alive in so many unfamiliar ways.
It was going to take some getting used to, feeling this way. Being this way - with him.
Only him.
How did she deal with that?
When he lifted his mouth, he growled, “I’m glad it’s me.”
How could it have been anyone else?
“You look...”
“Confused? Off balance? Because I am, but in the very best ways.”
“Giving you something to think about at night, huh?”
“And even during the day,” she conceded. “I can guarantee I’ll be thinking about sex tonight.”
A ragged groan rumbled from deep in his throat. “Damn, me too. Eventually, we’ll figure it out. Until then, I need you to know that I’ll never rush you.”
“I believe you.” After all, he was the one who’d ended the kiss. “What if I rush you?”
The corner of his mouth lifted. “The second the timing is right, let me know.” He followed that up with another kiss, one that lingered but didn’t go too far. “It’s late, we both need some sleep, and I don’t want to chance waking Ryder.”
Though she knew he was right, she hated for him to go. The past hour with him had a real revelation.
“I need you to promise me something, Joey.” Holding her face in his hands, he said, “Don’t ever disregard your instincts. If something seemed off tonight, you were right to be cautious. Ignoring those feelings could get you or Ryder hurt.”
Having her uneasiness acknowledged brought it all back to her. With Hendrix, she’d started to forget. “Did you see anything?”
“Without a flashlight, there wasn’t much to be seen, but nothing seemed out of place, I didn’t run into anyone, and I didn’t hear any movement.”
She hadn’t even considered that. “And if you had?”
He tucked back her hair. “I would have handled it.”
The very idea of him going up against an intruder propelled her from his arms.
Hendrix caught her before she’d gone far. “Joey, don’t.”
“But you could have been hurt.”
“Not likely. I’m good at this. At protecting people. Besides, this is my campground, so it’s my job to keep things secure. Two, I can deal with trouble. It’s what I did for years before I left the police force. Three, and this one is a biggie, if I know the issue I’ll be better prepared.”
“There was no issue. You said it yourself, you didn’t find anything.”
“This time.” He held her gaze. “I have a feeling you’re concerned about something, or someone specific?”
She deflated. Since he was involving himself, he did need to be better prepared so he wouldn’t underestimate the situation.
“My ex can be... unpredictable, and sometimes violent. If he dropped in... Well, it wouldn’t be the first time he’d shown up unexpectedly, but usually it’s because he’s in a mood so things get ugly quickly. ”
“A mood.” Hendrix said the word as if it left a bad taste in his mouth. “I assume we’re talking about a shitty mood, right? An aggressive mood? Dangerous?”
“Um...all that?” Unfortunately, there wasn’t a nicer way to put it. “He randomly gets annoyed about things, especially when he’s been drinking.” And he drank far too often.
“Have you heard from him?”
She shook her head, but admitted, “I’ve had a few calls with numbers I didn’t recognize. Probably just telemarketers, but I guess that’s why I was jumpy.”
“No, you were jumpy because you know your ex can be a problem and you love your son. You want to protect him but a woman alone doesn’t stand much of a chance.”
It was so wonderful to have acceptance, to have her feelings validated. “Thank you,” she whispered, “for understanding.”
“Just because I didn’t find anyone tonight doesn’t mean you overreacted. It doesn’t mean that he, or someone else, wasn’t here scoping out your circumstances.”
Oh, God.
“I don’t want to scare you, and I definitely don’t want Ryder worried, but you two will be pretty isolated for the rest of the month.” The firm press of his lips to hers kept her from interjecting. “But now you’re not alone. I’m here and there’s no way I’m going to let anyone hurt you.”
Having this discussion while in his arms changed everything. Her chilled body absorbed his heat, his confidence made her feel more confident, too. With Hendrix, her every sense sparked with new life. She felt more...of everything. Everywhere.
Looking into those intense gray eyes, she saw his sincerity, and his need to assist. “You’re still a cop at heart, aren’t you?”
“I’m a man,” he said, as if that explained it thoroughly enough.
Overwhelmed with gratitude, she gave a shaky nod.
“What a difference a day makes. First the pizza and toys, then the agreement to let us stay.” His open hands against her back nudged her nearer, reminding her of the biggest surprise.
“It’s like some giant shift in the universe where I went from a failure as a wife, a broke and worried mom, the great sexless wonder, and now I’m making out with the hottest guy alive. ”
He grinned at her description. “You’ve obviously misjudged yourself.”
With help from Ted, but he was her past now and she planned to keep him there. “It’s almost like Christmas came early.”
His mouth tightened at the reminder of Christmas.
“You know the first thing I noticed about you? How you carry yourself with authority, like you know you have everything under control.”
“Not even close.”
“Whether that’s the case or not, it’s the vibe you give off. Before you, I didn’t know I was into that, but around you I feel safer.”
Tipping up her face, he said, “I sensed that with you, things could start to click into place, and I didn’t want that.
I wanted to keep nurturing my anger. I could deal with people, but I had no interest in socializing.
I wanted you, but still I fought the idea of getting involved.
” With a self-deprecating smile, he shook his head.
“Then you fed me peanut butter and jelly crackers, and Ryder showed me pants-less Wonder Woman.”
He was never going to let her live that down – and she didn’t mind at all.
After another soft smooch to her mouth, his smile turned gentle, introspective. “I enjoyed running into the two of you all week. After the first few times, I started anticipating it. I’d head out and my first thought was whether or not I’d see you.”
“We felt the same.”
“Then Ryder gave me that card, and it was like he cracked me wide open.” He went silent for a few seconds, introspective. “For the first time in almost two years, I saw myself, or rather, the man I used to be instead of the indifferent stranger I’d become.”
Joey went on tiptoes to kiss him. “I bet the old Hendrix is pretty fascinating, too.”
“I hope you’re willing to find out. Not that I want to embrace Christmas,” he cautioned. “I don’t, but I want us to spend more time together. Obviously, my schedule is flexible since I’d planned to hide out here.”
“A man of leisure,” she teased, but in her heart, she ached for him. She knew part of Hendrix was still hurting, and as soon as they got together again she’d make it a priority to find out why he disliked Christmas so much.
And if she could, she’d work a little holiday magic to help him through it.
“If you get anymore unfamiliar calls on your phone, keep track, okay? Do a screenshot before you block the number. Also, keep my number handy in case you hear anything else that bothers you.” He tipped up her face. “Anything at all, Joey. I don’t care if it’s a cricket. I mean that.”
“All right.”
He nodded as he pulled on his jacket. “Let me know whenever you’re free –if you feel like sharing a meal, using the hot tub, or just letting Ryder play.”
All of it sounded great to her. “I’ll figure out my schedule for next week and let you know.”
With a final touch to her cheek and a kiss that would have her missing him all night, he opened the door and stepped out. “Be sure to lock up.”
“Always. Goodnight, Hendrix.”
“Goodnight, Josephine. Sweet dreams.”
Smiling from the inside out, she closed the door, secured the deadbolt, and then hugged herself.
Sure, her situation was still dire, her finances hanging on by a frayed thread, and Christmas would be here in a few more weeks. Still, she felt lighter than she had in forever, buoyant with a sense of hope.
Hendrix had given her the greatest gift: time, opportunity to make it all work, and understanding.
He’d given himself. Yes, for her, Christmas was already here.