Chapter 14 #2
His hands moved. Traveled down Adriel's body, slow and deliberate, leaving trails of heat everywhere they touched. Down his back, fingers pressing into the muscles there, feeling the shape of him. Around to his sides, thumbs tracing the curve of his waist.
Adriel gasped into his mouth.
Landen swallowed the sound. Kissed him deeper. His hands found Adriel's hips, gripped them, pulled him closer until there was no space left between them.
His own hands moved without permission. Fisted in Landen's shirt again, pulled him closer, held on like he was drowning and Landen was air. He kissed back desperately, sloppily, poured everything he couldn't say into the press of his lips, the slide of his tongue.
Landen groaned against his mouth. The sound vibrated through Adriel, settled somewhere deep, made him want more.
One of Landen's hands slid lower. Cupped the curve of his ass, squeezed, pulled him tighter. The other found the back of his neck.
Adriel moaned. The sound was answered by another low groan from Landen. His tongue slid against Adriel's, explored every corner of his mouth, tasted him like he couldn't get enough. Like Adriel was something he'd been starving for.
Then the world shifted.
Adriel's back hit something soft, the mattress, and suddenly he was on his back with Landen above him, those long, strong limbs bracketing his body, that weight pressing him into the sheets.
Landen's body felt so good over his. So solid. So warm. So right in a way that made Adriel's chest ache.
His breath hitched. A small whimper escaped his mouth as their groins aligned, as the heat of Landen's body settled against his, as their cocks brushed through layers of clothing. The contact was electric, sent sparks up his spine, made his hips twitch without permission.
Landen dove right in. Kissed him furiously.
Deeper, harder, more desperate than before.
His tongue plunged into Adriel's mouth, claiming, possessing, leaving no corner unexplored.
Adriel kissed back as well as he could, which wasn't well at all; he was shaking too much, gasping too much, feeling too much to do anything but hold on and try to keep up.
Landen's hands began to move. They traveled down Adriel's body, palms pressing against his chest through his sweater, fingers spreading wide to feel as much of him as possible. The heat of those hands seeped through the fabric, warmed him from the outside in.
It felt so good.
Adriel was so hard it hurt. His cock was pressed against his thigh, trapped in his jeans, aching for attention he was too afraid to ask for. Every brush of Landen's hands, every shift of his weight, every slide of his tongue sent new waves of want crashing through him.
But.
There was always a but.
Every touch made him cringe slightly. Just a little. Just in the part of him that was watching this happen, waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Landen's hands moved lower. Found his stomach. Pressed into the softness there.
Adriel flinched. A tiny tensing of muscles, a catch in his breath. Landen didn’t seem to notice.
His hands moved lower still. Found the swell of Adriel's belly, the place he hated most, the part of himself he'd spent years trying to shrink and hide and make smaller. Landen's palms pressed into it, fingers spreading, feeling the give of it.
Adriel's eyes stung.
He was sure, with every passing moment, that this was it. That Landen would balk. That he'd finally come to his senses, finally feel what Adriel really was under the clothes and the low light and the wanting. That disgust would flicker across his face and he'd pull away, make an excuse, leave.
Landen's hands kept moving. Kept touching. Kept exploring. His tongue slid deeper into Adriel's mouth, and Adriel kissed him back, and waited for the moment it would end.
Then Landen's hands were beneath his sweater. The contact was sudden; warm palms against bare skin, fingers spreading over his stomach, his sides, his ribs. Landen's hands were soft. Warm. They felt so good against his skin, so right, so…
Adriel froze.
Every muscle locked. His hands flew from where they'd been clutching the sheets and grabbed the edge of his sweater. Tugged at it. Tried to pull it down, to cover himself, to hide.
Landen slowed the kiss. Drew back.
Adriel couldn't look at him.
He stared at Landen's chest instead. At the wrinkled shirt, the undone collar, the skin at his throat. Anywhere but those eyes. Anywhere but the judgment he was sure he'd find there.
His face was flaming. He could feel the heat of it, the burn spreading down his neck, probably staining his chest. He'd never been more embarrassed in his life.
"Do you want me to stop?" Landen asked quietly. His voice sounded strange. Raspy. Broken in a way Adriel hadn't heard before.
Why? Adriel wondered.
Why did he sound like that?
Adriel stayed quiet for a long time.
Of course he didn't want Landen to stop.
He had never felt this good in his entire life.
Never felt this wanted, this desired, this seen.
Landen was probably the most beautiful man Adriel had ever met.
And he was here. In Adriel's bed. Touching him.
Kissing him. Looking at him like he was the beautiful one.
No. He didn't want him to stop.
But.
If he said so, things would only progress further. He would have to take his clothes off. Have to bare himself completely, every inch, laid out. And then Landen would see. Really see. And everything would stop anyway.
And that, that would be far more devastating than just saying no now. Than pretending he didn't want this.
He finally looked up.
Landen was still hovering over him. His expression was open, waiting, patient in a way that made Adriel's chest hurt.
The words were there. On the tip of his tongue.
Yes. Stop. I don't want this. (You don't want this. You don't want me.)
But they stuck. Lodged in his throat.
Something flickered in Landen's eyes. Too quick for Adriel to understand. Too quick to read.
Then he shifted. Moved from hovering over Adriel to lying on his side next to him. His body snug against Adriel's, warm and solid. He propped himself up on one elbow, looking down at Adriel with those eyes, those impossible eyes.
"Do you trust me?" Landen asked, his gaze never leaving Adriel's.
Yes. The word came immediately. Without thought. Without hesitation.
He knew he shouldn't. Knew it was foolish. Knew where this had led the last time he'd trusted a man too far out of his league.
But.
This was different. Landen was different. Adriel didn't know how he knew, but he knew.
So he nodded.
Landen's hand came back. It didn't go for his skin. It went for his hand. Pressed against Adriel's fingers, the ones still clutching the edge of his sweater in a death grip. His palm covered them, warm and steady, and then it just... rested there.
His thumb began to move.
Slow caresses across Adriel's knuckles. Back and forth. Soothing. Gentle. The motion was hypnotic, calming, made Adriel's racing heart slow just slightly, just enough to breathe.
His eyes never strayed from Adriel's face. Never dropped to his body, to the skin he was trying to hide, to the parts of himself he was sure would make Landen run.
Adriel's grip on the sweater loosened. Barely. Just a fraction.
Another breath. Another loosening.
Then his hand went lax beneath Landen's. The tension drained out of his fingers. His hand softened, opened, let go. Let it fall to the sheets beside him.
Landen's hand stayed where it was.
Hovering in the air for a moment. One. Two.
Then it fell. Landed on Adriel's hip. The warmth of it seeped through his jeans, through the thick fabric, settled into his skin like it belonged there. Landen's fingers spread, covered as much of him as they could, held him gently but firmly.
His thumb found a small patch of skin.
Where the sweater had ridden up, just above the waistband of his jeans. A sliver of bare flesh, exposed and vulnerable. Landen's thumb pressed into it, barely there, a whisper of contact.
Then it moved.
Circles. Slow, lazy circles traced into that tiny patch of skin. Round and round, the motion hypnotic. Each pass sent shivers up Adriel's spine, made his breath catch, made his hips twitch involuntarily.
His breath stuttered. Came out in a shaky exhale that was almost a moan.
His cock, trapped in his jeans, throbbed painfully.
He could feel it, hard and aching, pressing against the fabric, desperate for attention.
A damp spot was forming at the tip; precome seeping through his boxers, through his jeans, evidence of how badly he wanted this. How badly he wanted him.
Landen's thumb kept moving.
Circles. Circles. Circles on that tiny patch of skin, driving Adriel slowly out of his mind. His hips shifted, just slightly, seeking friction, seeking something, anything, to ease the ache.
Landen's eyes stayed on his face. Taking in every micro-expression, every flutter of his lashes, every parted breath. He saw everything. Adriel was sure of it. Saw the want, the need, the desperate longing that Adriel had spent years trying to hide.
His thumb kept moving. Circles. Circles. Driving Adriel slowly, inexorably, out of his mind.
Then his hand moved.
It slid beneath the hem of his sweater, slow and deliberate, giving Adriel time to stop him. Time to say no.
Adriel didn't move. Couldn't move. Could barely breathe. He lay there, heart pounding, as Landen's hand crept upward. Palm against his stomach. Fingers spreading. Warmth seeping into skin that hadn't been touched like this in years.
Landen's other hand joined.
Both hands now, beneath his sweater, pushing the fabric up as they went. Inch by inch. Revealing him slowly, like he was unwrapping something precious. The hem crept higher; past his belly button, past the soft swell of his stomach, past his ribs.
Adriel's eyes squeezed shut. He couldn't watch. Couldn't bear to see the moment it happened.
He waited for it.
Braced for it.