Chapter 7
Chapter Seven
THE BEAUTY OF LIFE
W hen I awoke from my nap, I changed into something a little more comfortable. I settled on another sundress, but it was one that reached my ankles. After sliding my feet into a pair of flip flops, I headed downstairs to see what everyone was doing.
My mother and father were sitting in the living room together, watching a movie. It wasn’t often I got to see them spend time like this together. Neither of my brothers were with them, so I lingered in the doorway, watching the two of them from a distance as they laughed at the TV.
They both looked so carefree in the moment, like they had nothing to worry about except for what they were watching. I loved that for them and wished they had more time like this together. Most days, my father was exhausted after he got home from work and would fall asleep before they even made it up to bed.
I missed seeing the two of them like this together.
“Are you spying on them?” Eli whispered as he stopped beside me and rested his arm on my shoulder.
I swallowed hard over the emotion that was thick in my throat. “They look so content. They’re always so stressed and I never get to see them like this.”
"They’re stressed because they care, Luna. You know, they could have given you up if they didn’t want the responsibility, but they didn’t.”
His words felt like a blow to the chest. Like he reached inside my rib cage and drove his fist directly into my heart. “Sometimes, I wish they would have.”
“That’s pretty fucked up,” he muttered under his breath, his voice matter of fact. “None of us would change the way our lives have been. Stop being so damn negative about it and be grateful for having people who care this much about you.”
“Don’t tell me how to feel, Eli,” I whispered to him, tasting the venom on my tongue. “You don’t know what it feels like to be in my shoes.”
“No one knows what it feels like to be in anyone else’s shoes but their own.” He tilted his head, a ghost of a smile playing on his lips. “That’s the beauty of life. We just get to live on our own and make the best out of it.”
“What about them, though?” I questioned him as we both turned our attention back to our parents. “Don’t they get to enjoy their lives sometime?”
Eli is silent for a moment.
“What do you think they’ve been doing this entire time?”
“I’m sorry,” I apologized to him, my voice quiet and layered with guilt. “These past few weeks have been emotional and I’ve been letting them drag me down.”
“Well, stop it then. You’re our sunshine and none of us like cloudy skies. Don’t let the loud negative thoughts dim the light that shines down on our world.”
Eli removed his arm from my shoulder and gave it a squeeze with his hand before he left me alone to watch our parents. His words continued to ring in my head as I lingered in the doorway for a few more minutes before I finally entered the room.
My mother, with her supersonic senses, somehow noticed my presence and turned around to face me. A smile pulled at the corners of her lips and my father turned off the TV as he glanced over at me.
“How was your nap?” my mother questioned me, her voice warm and comforting like a baby's blanket.
“It was good.” I smiled back at her. “I feel refreshed. Like I can conquer the night now.”
Both of my parents rose to their feet and headed in my direction. My father looked at me thoughtfully and it made my heart constrict. He was never a man of many words, but he didn’t need them. He had a way of speaking with his expressions.
“I’m sure the Hart’s are waiting for us,” he said softly as he smiled at me and wrapped his arm around the tops of my shoulders. “What do you say we all head over there and crash the party?”
My phone vibrated in my hand and I glanced down to see that it was Giana calling. I looked back to my parents. “It’s G. Can I talk to her quickly and then we’ll head over?”
“Of course.” My mother smiled brightly. I slipped out from under my father’s arm and stepped into the other room as I answered her call.
Giana’s tanned face showed up on the screen and she had the biggest grin on her face as she waved at me. There was so much commotion in the background, but her sole focus was on me right now. Her bright blue eyes shined and I wished we were able to celebrate with each other.
Your mother sent me the video from your graduation ceremony, she signed after setting the phone down in front of her.
I did the same and propped it against the backsplash in the kitchen.
I wish we would have been able to celebrate together, I signed back to her.
Giana frowned for a moment. Sometime over the summer? I know you and Oliver have big plans, she said with a wink as she wiggled her eyebrows at me.
I gave her the middle finger just as her brother’s face appeared in the frame next to hers.
“Luna!” Nico said, his voice loud and filled with excitement. “Congratulations on your graduation!”
I was surprised to see him with her. I had met Nico while we were in the hospital, and since Giana and I had grown as close as we did, our families were well acquainted. I hadn’t seen either of them since their mother passed away last year. We celebrated Nico getting drafted into the NHL and then a few short months later, we were mourning the loss of the rock in their family.
“Hey, hot shot.” I smiled at Nico. “How’s the professional hockey life treating you?”
Nico shrugged. “Spent the past season proving my worth, but I’m really hopeful I’ll get the call.”
I smiled back at him. Nico worked hard playing hockey to get to where he was now. “There’s no doubt in my mind at all that you will get the call.”
Giana tried to shove her brother out of the way. The two of them laughed and the sound of Giana’s laughter made my heart swell. Since she had lost her hearing when we were kids, it wasn’t often she let her real voice be heard. The times I had actually heard it were few and far between.
“Well, it looks like I’m getting kicked out of this conversation. Hopefully we’ll see you soon, Luna!” Nico said with a playful grin. His bright blue eyes matched his sister’s, along with their dark hair.
“Bye Nico!”
Sorry about him, Giana signed to me as she rolled her eyes. He’s annoying as hell.
What brother isn’t annoying? I replied back to her, and we both smiled. My mother appeared in the doorway and tapped at her wrist. I turned back to Giana. Sorry, G, but I have to go. Oliver’s parents are having a party.
Text me later, Giana told me before adding she loved me and ended the call.
I turned back to my parents who were both waiting and offered them a smile. “Sorry, she just wanted to congratulate me on today.”
My mother smiled as I walked over to them. “Emilia would have been so proud. I can’t believe Giana graduated last week. And did I hear Nico’s voice too?”
I nodded at her. “It sounds like things are going really well for him with hockey.”
“He’s one hell of a player,” my father chimed in. “I always knew Nico Cirone would go places.”
There was a soberness that settled around us as all our thoughts drifted to Giana and Nico’s mother. It hadn’t been an easy two years for them, and a part of me had struggled with survivor’s guilt since Emilia passed away. Her cancer came quickly and it wasn’t long before she lost her battle. I should have died a long time ago, yet here I still was.
Life didn’t make sense.
“Okay, enough of this.” My mother’s voice broke through the silence as she clapped her hands together. “We have two amazing kids we need to go celebrate.”
My father smiled at me; his expression filled with pride. “Let’s head over to the Harts before they send out a search team.”
The three of us walked out of the kitchen together and my mother paused at the bottom of the stairs before calling up to my brothers. They both came down immediately, and we headed over to Oliver’s house together as a family.
It was in these moments I missed all of us being under the same roof together. Who knew how much time we would have like this? The thought was one that troubled me constantly, but I didn’t want to hold my brothers back from living their lives. They had every right to experience it to the fullest.
When we got over to the Harts house, the party was already in full swing. A few of my aunts and uncles greeted us as soon as we walked through the gate that led into the backyard. The blades of grass tickled the bottoms of my feet as they slipped between my feet and flip flops. There were more people than I expected, but this was everything Oliver deserved. He deserved to be celebrated.
After briefly speaking with our family members, I slipped away when I caught Oliver’s gaze from across the lawn. His parents were sitting at one of the tables seated near the patio attached to the back of their house. We had spent so much time playing in his yard as children, it would always hold a special place in my heart.
Mrs. Hart had strung fairy lights between the trees and the house and it illuminated in the darkness of the night. Music played from the surround sound speakers they had hidden around the patio area. As I walked past her, she smiled brightly at me, raising her hand to wave.
I waved back to her, feeling like I was in some sort of a dream. None of the people around me really mattered at that moment. I wanted to get to my best friend because he was who I really wanted to celebrate with. We made it through all these years together and our time together was running out faster than I wanted.
It was like watching the sand in an hourglass drain from the top to the bottom. Yet, it was as if it was moving in fast forward. It was draining, five grains of sand at a time instead of one.
“Luna.” Oliver beamed at me, his voice a stark contrast to its hoarseness. “I was beginning to worry you weren’t going to come over.”
“You’re not going to get rid of me that easily, Oliver Hart,” I reminded him with a wink.
A mixture of emotions flickered in his eyes, but it quickly washed away as he held one hand out to me. “Come with me.”
Sliding my hand into his, I let him lead me away from the party. As we walked around the back of their shed, I knew exactly where he was taking me. We reached the massive oak tree in the back corner of the yard, both of us tipping our heads back to look at the treehouse Mr. Hart built for us when we were younger.
Oliver glanced over at me, a soft smile played on his lips as he slipped his hand from mine and motioned to the wooden ladder that hung from above. “After you, my queen.”
A soft laugh escaped me and I rolled my eyes at him. “You’re going to inflate my ego if you keep calling me your queen.”
“That’s the plan, Luna.” He winked at me as I grabbed hold of one of the prongs on the ladder. “Even after you realize I’m speaking the truth, I will never stop reminding you of what you really are.”
My breath caught in my throat, leaving me breathless for a moment. If I didn’t know Oliver the way I did, I would think he’s just a smooth talker. The type of guy who tells you the things you want to hear. But that’s not Oliver Hart. He tells me the things I need to hear.
My lungs decided to cooperate and I sucked in a deep breath before I began my ascent up the ladder, toward our own little slice of heaven we created together. It was dark inside as I crawled up through the hole in the middle of the floor. Oliver was right behind me and walked past me to reach the battery powered lights we had hung across the ceiling.
I dropped the hatch over the opening in the floor and Ollie lit up the treehouse with the lights. My eyes traveled around the space, a feeling of nostalgia filled me as I looked at the posters we hung up many years ago. On one side were the boy band ones I hung, and on the other were all the football related ones Oliver hung.
“Jeez, we should maybe update this place, don’t you think?” I questioned him with a smirk as I dropped down onto one of the bean bags we had. We each had our own, along with some pillows, blankets, and extra cushions from their old patio furniture.
Ollie sat down on the other bean bag chair with an inquisitive look on his face. He tilted his head to the side. “Now why would we do that? It’s like a history museum here… the history of our childhood.”
His words warmed my heart, and I couldn’t fight the smile that pulled on the corners of my lips. He was right. Even though it was outdated, it had different pieces from when we were growing up. Oliver’s comic books were stacked in one corner and the young romance novels I read were stacked right beside them.
“You’re right,” I agreed with him, nodding thoughtfully. “We used to spend so much time up here when we were kids. I feel like we haven’t been up here in so long.”
“Which is why we’re back here now. This is our place, Looney Tune, and no one else’s.”
Someone from the party called for Oliver, and I glanced out the window to see his mother walking around. “I think your mom is looking for you. Maybe we should get back to the party.”
Oliver’s hand was warm as he wrapped it around my wrist and pulled me back to my bean bag chair. “Nope. I don’t care about the party, and she can bother me later. Right now, this is our time, in our place.”
A soft laugh fell from my lips. “Whatever you say. When she gets mad because she couldn’t find you, that’s your fault.”
Oliver pursed his lips and sighed as he rose to his feet. I watched him as he walked over to one of the windows and pushed open the wooden shutter before yelling out to his mom to tell her we were up here and we’d be down in a little bit. He pulled the shutters closed and the hinges creaked from wear and tear before he took his seat next to me.
“What are we doing up here, anyway?”
“I know you better than anyone else, Luna,” Ollie reminded me with a smirk. “You’d rather be up here and away from all the people down there.”
I shrugged dismissively, even though he hit the nail on the head. “Yeah, you’re right.”
“And I want to talk about your bucket list,” he added, completely catching me off guard as he rolled onto his side on the chair to face me. “Summer starts tomorrow, so what’s first on our agenda?”
My eyes widened as I stared back at him. “I didn’t bring my list with me,” I all but choked the words out. I still hadn’t written a revised version for him to see, but I would do that later tonight.
“Luna, you have a better memory than anyone I know,” he admitted, his eyes shining back at me. I watched the way his shirt hugged the muscles in his back as he turned away. My mouth suddenly felt dry and I swallowed roughly, trying to not study him, but I couldn’t tear my eyes away.
Oliver rolled back to face me with a notebook and a pen in his hand. His gaze collided with mine as he caught me watching him. A look of amusement danced in his eyes and he raised an eyebrow at me as the warmth spread up my neck and across my cheeks.
Being the perfect gentleman he was, he didn’t call me out on it.
“Tell me what was on your list and I’ll write it down now.”
I swallowed again, wishing I had brought a water bottle with me. My list had a few personal things but I could leave them out. All I had to do was tell him the other things on the list. “Okay, but one thing,” I told him, my voice low with warning. “You’re not allowed to laugh at any of them.”
“Deal.” He smiled, nodding as he held out his pinky finger to me. I slid mine through his and we linked them together, shaking before we broke apart. Oliver positioned his pen on the paper and began to write as I read out my list.
I watched as Oliver finished writing the last one before he looked up at me. His sage green eyes collided with mine and there was a hint of sadness in them. It wasn’t the expression I was anticipating from him. Most of the items on my list seemed juvenile and I was worried that he would judge me for them.
“They’re stupid, aren’t they?” I questioned him, waving my hand dismissively as though none of it really mattered.
Oliver shook his head and his throat bobbed as he swallowed hard. “None of them are stupid, Luna,” he assured me, his voice hoarse and thick with emotion. “Each and every single one is perfect.”
“Why the long face, Ollie?” I questioned him, refusing to ignore the way that he was looking at me with a dampness in his eyes.
“Sometimes it just hurts, you know?”
His words caught me off guard and my breath caught in my throat as I tilted my head to the side. “What hurts?”
“The fact that you don’t get the simplicity in life and these other assholes take everything they have for granted.”
It felt like a ton of bricks had landed on my chest. He spoke nothing but words of truth, and if only he knew how often that thought crossed my mind. I had spent a lot of my life sitting on the sidelines, watching the world around me continue to move as if I were stuck in my own personal purgatory.
As a child, I watched the kids at the playground get into arguments while they played tag. All I had wanted was to have the option to get tagged by another kid, but I struggled to walk up a flight of stairs without being completely breathless.
I couldn’t fault anyone for not realizing they had a lot more to be thankful for. You can’t judge someone from the outside when you don’t fully know what is going on in their lives or their own internal struggles.
We were all on our own journeys in life, some of them just looked a little different than others.
“You can’t be mad at them for it, Oliver,” I told him, my voice soft and gentle as I reached out for his hand. His skin was warm against mine and it was seeping into my veins. “They don’t know what they’re taking for granted because they’ve never been without it.”
His jaw clenched and he laced his slender fingers through mine. I watched him carefully as he squeezed his eyes shut, his chest rising as he inhaled a deep breath. When he lifted his eyelids, there was nothing but torment that filled the depths of his green irises. “It’s just not fair, Luna.”
“We don’t get to choose what is or isn’t fair,” I reminded him as the corners of my lips lifted into a sad smile. “That’s just the beauty of life.”